Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

stupidusername

Yeah my withdrawal isn't too bad.i'm on skipping 4days now I think.i get zappy which is just horrendous.i took one yesterday just cause I couldn't handle a day of it.

sparkle_23

Hello, I have previously been on meds for depression back in 2009 for about a year. Things got a lot better for me and I was happy and my life was back on track. Since December last year I've been feeling low again. There's problems at home and I'm finding college really tough. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of two years and now I feel like I've hit rock bottom. I'm thinking about starting taking meds again but I wonder is it right? I don't feel I can better myself but I'm a bit nervous about going on meds again

LegacyUser

Been ok the last few weeks but I can once again feel the pressure in my head start to build.

Why am I unemployed? Why can't I get a job? Why do I keep trying and find nothing? What will I do with my life? Will I emigrate? If I have to go on my own for a few months, will I find I don't love my OH when I see him again? Will it damage our relationship/my perception of our relationship? Why do I worry so much about this stuff?

I can feel the tears coming back over the last few days, for no reason. Yesterday I considered calling the counsellor I went to a few months ago, just for...something, I don't know. I know my problem right now is that I'm so down about being unemployed, so frustrated by the whole experience. I resent the fact that I might have to emigrate, that I'd be driven out of my home and my country. I know other people are worse off and I'm a bit excited about possibly going - but I'm just so scared of what might happen if I'm alone in some other country without the support of my family and the panic attacks come back.I hate the fact that I worked so hard through school and college and the last few years of work, to end up here - faced with having to go back to waitressing or shop work (assuming I'd even manage to get that) just to get by. That that's all I get for all the work I put in. I am being driven mad by endlessly turning over in my head all day what to do next - Masters (which one? Which one? How on earth would I pay for it and for the house for the next year?), any old job I can get my hands on, or emigrate??

I also get the odd feeling again of wanting to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head and never come out. I want someone else to solve this for me. I'm so sick of fighting - trawling through websites, hunting for anything out there by way of a job, sending out CV's, worrying about what to do next, worrying about whether I'll ever manage to be able to get a job and earn money again. I'm just so tired of it all. And worse, I know I pull away inside myself when I get like this - I feel like I have to deal with this stuff all by myself, and I push everyone away - because it takes everything I have to cope, leaving me with nothing to give to anyone else, no matter how much I love them. I just feel so incredibly alone sometimes, even though in reality I'm not.

I just want...I don't know what I want. Just for things to be right again.

mdan

*Sparkle* wrote: »

Hello, I have previously been on meds for depression back in 2009 for about a year. Things got a lot better for me and I was happy and my life was back on track. Since December last year I've been feeling low again. There's problems at home and I'm finding college really tough. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of two years and now I feel like I've hit rock bottom. I'm thinking about starting taking meds again but I wonder is it right? I don't feel I can better myself but I'm a bit nervous about going on meds again

Have you tried any other therapies to help you

margarite

stupidusername wrote: »

Its a bit more complex than that.nothing gets solved by listening to music.i appreciate the input but for me at least its no use.taking things one day at a time used to be my way but cant approach everything like that.and things keep happening so you cant ignore them

I know it is more complicated then that and I do not mean just listen to music I mean taking time out doing something that you enjoy and then taking on things one at a time. If you feel overstressed or overwhelmed take a step back see what you can deal with and do it. It is hard I should know I used to feel like you now I take one things at a time and if something turns up unexpectely if I cannot deal with it I will look for help.

Sophie_

Panic Central wrote: »

Been ok the last few weeks but I can once again feel the pressure in my head start to build.

Why am I unemployed? Why can't I get a job? Why do I keep trying and find nothing? What will I do with my life? Will I emigrate? If I have to go on my own for a few months, will I find I don't love my OH when I see him again? Will it damage our relationship/my perception of our relationship? Why do I worry so much about this stuff?

I can feel the tears coming back over the last few days, for no reason. Yesterday I considered calling the counsellor I went to a few months ago, just for...something, I don't know. I know my problem right now is that I'm so down about being unemployed, so frustrated by the whole experience. I resent the fact that I might have to emigrate, that I'd be driven out of my home and my country. I know other people are worse off and I'm a bit excited about possibly going - but I'm just so scared of what might happen if I'm alone in some other country without the support of my family and the panic attacks come back.I hate the fact that I worked so hard through school and college and the last few years of work, to end up here - faced with having to go back to waitressing or shop work (assuming I'd even manage to get that) just to get by. That that's all I get for all the work I put in. I am being driven mad by endlessly turning over in my head all day what to do next - Masters (which one? Which one? How on earth would I pay for it and for the house for the next year?), any old job I can get my hands on, or emigrate??

I also get the odd feeling again of wanting to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head and never come out. I want someone else to solve this for me. I'm so sick of fighting - trawling through websites, hunting for anything out there by way of a job, sending out CV's, worrying about what to do next, worrying about whether I'll ever manage to be able to get a job and earn money again. I'm just so tired of it all. And worse, I know I pull away inside myself when I get like this - I feel like I have to deal with this stuff all by myself, and I push everyone away - because it takes everything I have to cope, leaving me with nothing to give to anyone else, no matter how much I love them. I just feel so incredibly alone sometimes, even though in reality I'm not.

I just want...I don't know what I want. Just for things to be right again.

Hi there,
Have you got any family or someone you trust cthat can help you out? It's hard to ask for help when you're so down but I think perhaps asking someone you trust to help you through this tough time & ask them to take you to your GP. It will get better but I think you should get that appointment with your GP,
Best of luck

LegacyUser

Thanks Sophie. I do have family, and my OH, who I love very much (and thankfully, that love is returned). It's just that being on your own for most of the day does weird things to your brain. I worry a lot about the future, on many fronts and I had panic attacks a few months ago which brought these worries right back to the very fore front of my mind. I'm really sick of just being in limbo the whole time, waiting to see what will happen. We've discussed emigration, the whole works, but as our wedding is later in the year, we have to wait until after that before taking any major steps.

I get very down and resentful that I'm penny pinching, watching money the whole time, unable to buy or do anything - can't even buy myself underwear without budgeting for about 2 weeks for it. My OH does his best but it's slowly but surely chipping away at me.I just hate that I should be enjoying this time - late twenties, engaged, happy - and all I can think of is how on earth I'll ever manage to get a salary again. It's horrible.

I know there are people out there far worse than me, and with many more problems, but when you're in the thick of it, it's very hard to think like that.

stupidusername

Have to move out of my apartment and i've nowhere to move to.i've been really unsettled all day.i dont see how i'll be able to sleep.constant tense feeling

starviewadams

Crap weekend but went for a walk in the park this evening to calm myself down a bit,will have to ask for an advance in my wages in work tommorow to pay the feckin esb bill,I'm absolutely dreading it,so awkward and guilty.

stupidusername

What a horrible situation to be in.i can well imagine the nerves that you'd have.have screwed myself over many times because I can't confront people. I hope it goes well for you.

careca11

HI
Hope everyone is doing good today

I've been on Ciprimal now for about the last 6 weeks (I'm a worrier by nature, but got so wound up about money and possiblity of losing my job coming down the line) , all of this culminated in me suffering serve lack of sleep (went 5 full days with only 2 hours sleep) and none interest in anything especially my wife,I tried my best to hold it together in front of my 20month old son .......................
anyway since been on it I've been doing well , and not letting things bother me ,and most of all I'm actually sleeping great for the first time since I was about 20 (all of 14 years ago)
but have any of you currently on it had any side-effects like erectile dysfunction? this is annoying my as I normally have a very high sex-drive
how did you get over it ,
all opinion's welcome

Plumeria

Crashing all the time atm.

Altogether I've spoken to three GPs, tried several meds, and spent close to a grand on psychiatrist appointments. Nobody can even tell me what my problem is.

The only thing anyone can say to me is "seek help" or "talk about it". I have already done that.
I think about suicide a lot now and it's getting harder to think of reasons not to do it. Sorry for posting this.

KnifeWRENCH

So....I had what was pretty much the most intense counselling session I've ever had today. I came out with stuff I'd thought before but had never said out loud, and quite frankly a lot of the stuff I come out with was quite scary.

I'm getting the feeling that I'm not ready to recover, and I may never be ready. Recovering would involve accepting who I am and no longer hating myself. And that sounds pretty much impossible, despite the medication and the counselling and whatnot.

If I ever wanna get better, I'm ultimately responsible for taking those steps myself, of my own accord. And I cannot do that.

*sigh* The idea of being depressed for the rest of my life is horrifying, but the idea of ever being fully recovered is too unreal and alien to even begin contemplating. I'm now so confused about whether I ever wanna get better or not, and even if I do will I be ready to do it?

Ugh, I don't know....

Plumeria wrote: »

I think about suicide a lot now and it's getting harder to think of reasons not to do it.

If you're thinking of suicide, please read the link here and contact some of the organisations listed in it. They deal with this kind of thing all the time, so they'll be able to advise you better than any of us here would. Please give it a chance.

starviewadams

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem,doctors and nurses have said this to me so many times and it's true.If you are feeling suicidal please ring the samaritans @ 1850 60 90 90 or a friend or family member and talk things over,suicide isn't the answer to anything,even if it seems to you like it is now.

stupidusername

But what if the problem isn't temporary. Boards gets me down so much so often,but i've nothing else to do with my time.i've one friend I see maybe once a week.what a lonely existence

bob50

careca11 wrote: »

HI
Hope everyone is doing good today

I've been on Ciprimal now for about the last 6 weeks (I'm a worrier by nature, but got so wound up about money and possiblity of losing my job coming down the line) , all of this culminated in me suffering serve lack of sleep (went 5 full days with only 2 hours sleep) and none interest in anything especially my wife,I tried my best to hold it together in front of my 20month old son .......................
anyway since been on it I've been doing well , and not letting things bother me ,and most of all I'm actually sleeping great for the first time since I was about 20 (all of 14 years ago)
but have any of you currently on it had any side-effects like erectile dysfunction? this is annoying my as I normally have a very high sex-drive
how did you get over it ,
all opinion's welcome

Hi Carecall I am on Lexapro now have been taking Cipramil 20mg and 10 mg over the last 7 years Also same as you they help to keep me together

But i ve have the same side effects as you with the sex drive its a real bummer.

Carecall pm me and i will discuss

starviewadams

stupidusername wrote: »

But what if the problem isn't temporary. Boards gets me down so much so often,but i've nothing else to do with my time.i've one friend I see maybe once a week.what a lonely existence

The problem might not be temporary,I know that mine isn't,I've felt depressed and anxious since I started in secondary school over 10 years ago,but giving up on life shouldn't be an option.I've been hospitalized in the past I've gotten that low and self harmed so badly and I probably will again in the future unfortunately,but things do improve every now and then,even just slightly,so it's worth sticking around for.

I'm in the same boat as you,I don't get on with my family and only have one person who I can actually classify as a friend who calls around on a Friday night for a few beers,I get up every morning and sit in a dank office basement with two other horrible people making sales calls and then come home and sit in my room and over analyze the the day that's just passed,it is a shít existence but hopefully things will get better in the future.

Princess Peach

I hate when I'm fine for a while and then have a few teary days for no reason, like now. I tend to forget that this happens quite often when things are going well

stupidusername

Jesus starview that sounds bad.but how do you keep going? I mean I dont know how to

careca11

starviewadams wrote: »

The problem might not be temporary,I know that mine isn't,I've felt depressed and anxious since I started in secondary school over 10 years ago,but giving up on life shouldn't be an option.I've been hospitalized in the past I've gotten that low and self harmed so badly and I probably will again in the future unfortunately,but things do improve every now and then,even just slightly,so it's worth sticking around for.

I'm in the same boat as you,I don't get on with my family and only have one person who I can actually classify as a friend who calls around on a Friday night for a few beers,I get up every morning and sit in a dank office basement with two other horrible people making sales calls and then come home and sit in my room and over analyze the the day that's just passed,it is a shít existence but hopefully things will get better in the future.

perhaps a hobby would help , so when you get home from work you could concentrate on this instead of the day that just past.
at the moment , my wife and son , kepp me going , but before my son ever existed , I started studying , and took the hobby of Model Railways (ok not everyone's cup of tea....................but it helped me, when I completed a small project i had a sense of pride in myself)
and most recently I find cooking to be very helpful

mdan

careca11 wrote: »

HI
Hope everyone is doing good today

I've been on Ciprimal now for about the last 6 weeks (I'm a worrier by nature, but got so wound up about money and possiblity of losing my job coming down the line) , all of this culminated in me suffering serve lack of sleep (went 5 full days with only 2 hours sleep) and none interest in anything especially my wife,I tried my best to hold it together in front of my 20month old son .......................
anyway since been on it I've been doing well , and not letting things bother me ,and most of all I'm actually sleeping great for the first time since I was about 20 (all of 14 years ago)
but have any of you currently on it had any side-effects like erectile dysfunction? this is annoying my as I normally have a very high sex-drive
how did you get over it ,
all opinion's welcome

ciprimal 20mgs for the past 3 years and it affects women also in the same way - no sex drive - I think its the same though for most of the meds its very hards - hope your wife understands talk to her about it thats what I had to do with my husband and it does help - good luck with everything xx

LegacyUser

I HAVE to try and go for a walk everyday. It's one of the few things keeping me sane.

Don't expect miracles.Just enjoy being out and about. I'm lucky to live on the coast so the landscape is nice - and the breezes blow the cobwebs away...I don't know how it does it, but i always feel a bit better after a few days in a row of going for a walk everyday.

Maybe the solution isn't "curing" or "recovering". Maybe it's just as simple as learning to live with it. To have more good days than bad, and to know inside you that when the bad days come, they'll pass.

If I learned anything in the last few months, I learned that there isn't really a label for what comes into my head - it can be described by many things - anxiety, panic, high levels of worry, obsessive thinking, whatever. So there's no point going from doctor to doctor to try and get a label for it(in my case). As long as I have some control over it, I'm happier. Which helps a lot.

careca11

mdan wrote: »

ciprimal 20mgs for the past 3 years and it affects women also in the same way - no sex drive - I think its the same though for most of the meds its very hards - hope your wife understands talk to her about it thats what I had to do with my husband and it does help - good luck with everything xx

My wife does indeed understand the predictament ,but she wondering how we get over this minor hurdle as both of us would have had a very high sex-drive ,
what she does not understand is the fact that I have had to end up getting medication in the first place , but then again she's a very happy go lucky sort of person ,,things just don't seem to bother her ,
and no matter what she gets a great night sleep (i kinda envy her),
whereas most nights i'd be climbing the walls with stress and sh1t going round my in head ,
since been on the med , sleep pattern much better thankfully, big black circles under my eyes seem to be disappearing "woohoo"

Laisurg

Lately i've been feeling very down, the thing is, i'm not really sure why, a few months ago things were extremely rough but now things are starting to look up but i've been feeling worse and worse, i've lost interest in virtually everything i used to enjoy doing and become very quiet around other people, i've had problems with anxiety my whole life but the strange thing is that these feelings have gone and have been replaced with feelings of hopelessness, the only thing i can think of that could be causing this would be my inability to make relationships work, but i don't actually feel that down about that, i just feel miserable and can barely bring myself to get out of bed some mornings, has anyone else here ever experienced feelings like this when things were actually going pretty well?

monkeyactive

Hi there , here are a few things which have for me personally really made the difference and I feel are helping me to heal slowly and surely .

Books ;
Anything by Eckharrt Tolle - helps to understand how thinking effects us and how to be more concious of our thinking .

The road less followed - good book on spiritual turmoil from a therapists perspective

Depression: An Emotion, Not a Disease by Aine Tubridy ,Michael Corry - very insightful and book that argues for a holisitc approach to working with depression.

Therapies ;
Tai chi - slow moving martial art , slows down the mind and has numerous health benefits teaches you to kick ass also .

Talking Therapy ; find a good therapist you have good communication with you will know when you have found one that is right for you.

Homeopathy - medecine that urges the body to naturally express witheld energy and emotion rather than repress .

Reiki - energises the bodies natural healing energy again will help to bring up emotional discomfort .

And the cliched but necessary stuff ;

Exercise , time in nature , keeping up social contact even if it is very difficult , doing what you like to do , a healthy balanced diet , looking after yourself .

starviewadams

Laisurg wrote: »

Lately i've been feeling very down, the thing is, i'm not really sure why, a few months ago things were extremely rough but now things are starting to look up but i've been feeling worse and worse, i've lost interest in virtually everything i used to enjoy doing and become very quiet around other people, i've had problems with anxiety my whole life but the strange thing is that these feelings have gone and have been replaced with feelings of hopelessness, the only thing i can think of that could be causing this would be my inability to make relationships work, but i don't actually feel that down about that, i just feel miserable and can barely bring myself to get out of bed some mornings, has anyone else here ever experienced feelings like this when things were actually going pretty well?

Go and explain to your GP how you are feeling,he might prescribe you something or he might refer you to a counsellor or psychiatrist to talk about how you are feeling and why.

LegacyUser

Hi Everyone,

I've tried 5 different types of meds and none have made any difference for me. Psych put me on max dose of Cymbalta but it really has been making me suicidal i think. I went to GP who halved the dose back down to 60mg. That dose never helped me either. I've to wait months for my next psych appointment.

I just feel so bad. Ive been in therapy for over a year but I dont seem to get any better. My life is a nightmare.

Has anybody had the same experience with anti-depressants and suicidal thoughts?

Has anybody tried several meds before finding one that worked?

Can somebody be resistant?

Thanks all. xx

Ps Mods-I think it would be much more helpful if the depression forum was divided up into categories. Lumping all the issues in together isn't as helpful as it could be and threads are not answered alot of the time.

Princess Peach

Had a pretty ok day and was pretty motivated to come home from work and do a bunch of things that need to be done about 3 weeks ago that I keep putting off. Then one tiny little thing has upset me and now I just want to curl up and go to sleep. Wish I could just brush things off, or stand up for myself a bit better.

I want to be one of those easy going people that don't let little things get them down.

BornIn84

hi Can anybody tell me how long the drug ciprotan takes to work .My mother is on them 3 weeks and to me shes worse.

stupidusername

Could've written that myself PP. I can't help but let things get to me. my boss makes a comment to me every day about leaving work when I do, and it's gotten to the point that I feel nervous when it comes time to leave, and I know he's being an idiot, but I'm getting to really hate work now because of it. and there's stuff going on in a forum on here, people being quite nasty to me, and it's really getting to me. it makes me nervous to see a new post in those threads in case it's something directed at me. I'm just not able to deal with people.