Don't know if I am straight or gay!

LegacyUser

Im a girl, and Ive always been into guys, ever since I can remember. I never felt that attraction towards girls. I like looking at them and what theyre wearing, but never had sexual thoughts about them. Then I met this girl and I cant get her out of my head! Everything about her drives me crazy, her smile, her sense of humour etc. She occupies my thoughts morning, noon and night! I lay awake in bed thinking about what she might be doing or just about her in general.

Why am I feeling like this all of the sudden? I kissed a girl once before and it didnt do anything for me. So why this very strong attraction out of nowhere!!

Any thoughts from anyone??

Boston

You could be neither. Welcome to the middle, most people are here somewhat. Sounds like you have a crush, It's pretty normal. Basically you're pretty much straight up to now but this one person has come a long and thrown everything you thought was true about your sexuality out the window. Not much advice I can give except that it happens. Everyone started off with that first crush.

Chuchoter

The big thing here is is it a sexual or emotional attraction? Do you view her as sexy, exactly like you would a guy or is it just she's really charismatic and beautiful. I'd call you bicurious, leaning heavily straight.

Do you want to kiss her etc etc. If not you're probably the way you always were.

stephen_n

The question is how much does it matter to you, to put yourself in a category?

Attraction happens on many levels and some times it becomes confusing as to the nature of it. Freud believed we are different things at different points in our lives and that our sexuality is fluid, so this might be the case for you!

Dwn Wth Vwls

I think I've heard Cynthia Nixon (Sex and the City) talk about her experience with this, you might find interviews with her helpful. As far as she was concerned she was straight all her life, then she just "fell in love with a woman".

It's quite common really. The only difference is that people are open minded enough to question it these days, instead of ignoring it out of fear. I suppose what you have to figure out is if it's sexual and if you want to do anything about it.

(Straight and gay are not the only two options obviously.)

LegacyUser

Thanks for the comments peeps, and for not being condescending. I suppose it is a crush, but I do think of her in a sexual way. I still cannot stop thinking about how much I want to kiss her. When I see her come online, my heart kind of skips a bit.

I told her the other day I thought she was incredibly sexy and I found her extremely attractive. I even told her about wanting to kiss her. (I am so lucky she did not run away screaming 'psycho internet stalker')
She said she thought I was very cute, and normally would love flirting with me, but she was in a relationship. She was really flattered, and said she hoped I didnt stop talking to her.

Crushed as I was, I still enjoy talking to her. And, yes still have thoughts about her. But im not looking for a woman to date (in general). Like when I go out, I dont check out the girls.

Still confused, but not afraid of what feelings may come or go. I guess you fall for a person, and who they are, not whats in their pants.