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  • 12-03-2010 3:31pm
    #1
    coldfire1x
    Registered Users Posts: 3,354 ✭✭✭


    A history teacher & his wife were sitting at a table. The wife asked. 'Anything new at work?'
    He replied, 'No, I'm teaching History.'



    • Two old ladies were attending a rather long church service. One leaned over & whispered: My butt is going to sleep. 'I know,' replied the other, 'I heard it snore three times.'




    • Q: What's the diff between mother & wife?
    A: One woman brings into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.



    • A guy took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler, calling people for their views on various issues. On his very first call, he introduced myself, "Hello, this is a telephone poll."
    A man on the other end replied, "Yeah, and this is a street light!"




    • John enters kitchen, opens sugar container, looks inside and closes it. He does this again and again. Why?
    Because his Doctor told him to check sugar level regularly.



    • Boss: I'll give you 3000 per month and in three months, I'll raise it to 6000. So when would you like to start?
    John: In 3 months.



    • A girl proposed to Santa and he denied simply saying that in our family, we marry only our relatives. My mom married my dad, my brother married my bhabhi , my uncle married my aunt and so on. So please excuse me !!!!!



    • I took my secretary to lunch the other day, and I discovered she was not the old fashioned type. After two old fashions she couldn't type.



    • Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world.
    There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord,"
    And there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."



    • There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go thru hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.


    History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
    Little Johhny : sir, i am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....
    Teacher : U failure ! @ ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
    Little Johhny : Mind u, Sir, but @ ur age hitler commited suicide


    Teacher : four beautiful ladies r walking on the road. change it to
    exclamatory sentence ...
    Little Johhny : WOW !

    If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?
    Ans : the days after marriage


    The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
    The wife decided to make a wish,too. But she leaned over too much, fell
    into the well, and drowned.
    The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled "It really works!"


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