Teens with nothing to do?

Deliverance

Teens are a problem in some if not all areas, would that be a fair point?

Problem1: In some places they gather in groups and unfortunately abuse and mouth off to some adults for a wind up.
Problem2: In some cases they hang out outside off licences asking folks to buy them beer or cigs.

Now if they had something better to do at their difficult stage of life (hormones and all that) then surely they could and would socialise with each other in a more constructive way?

As parents of kids / teens I would ask you guys: What suggestions that you might have to give them something to do that would effectively give them something to do that would fit their social needs and possibly give them a place or places to go to?

Moonbeam

I have found youth cafes and youth groups excellent for teenagers,they can socialise together in a safe environment that is theirs.

Deliverance

Moonbeam wrote: »

I have found youth cafes and youth groups excellent for teenagers,they can socialise together in a safe environment that is theirs.

That option more often than not does not exist in some/ most places. And the teens in some areas. If it works in the respect of something for them to do and socialise, then that is good and more importantly it provides them with a means to socialise with each other in a supervised sense.

However I find locally that these potential places are underfunded and uncaring towards the teens plight. It is more than easy to see them as problems rather than doing something about them in a positive way.

Previously on this forum I viewed them as a problem that I had a strong bias against. I now view them first and foremost as individuals that need help.

I suppose that is because I gained oppurtunities that I wish to pass on to said teens as a teacher?

John Mason

20 years ago things were the same.

i was not allowed hang around on street corners, so my parents made my house the hang out place.

we had our own room, where we would hang out with my mam making tea and toasted sandwiches for everyone.

into my twenties, my mates would still back to my house after the pub and hang out, in fairness my mother was known to throw people out of the house at 4am but that was all part of the fun.

now i am in my late'ish 30's, dont live in my home town and some of friends and my brothers friends will still knock up to my parents for tea and dinner. if we are all going out, my parents place is still the meet up point.

in recent years, we lived next door to my gran and they would all call up at various times during the to have tea with her.

what i am trying to say - make your house the hangout place, be the cool parents. make your kids friends want to hang out in your house.

i was not allowed hangout on the streets, so if i wanted to see my friends they had to come to my house.

if my friends were/are having problems they would/do come and talk to mother (i could never/cant talk to my mother about anything but i had another family member to talk to )

Davidth88

It's an interesting problem

I can see both sides .

Our local shops are virtually no go areas after about 7-8pm with up to 50 youths hanging about .

Now basically they are not doing anything wrong , but even I find them a little intimidating , and in the mornings what do you find ? broken bottles/litter/evidence of drinking etc.

As for the local parkland , that's just a mess !

But to be honest where do they go ? ?

There are youth cafe's / various youth clubs , however by their very nature kids want to be rebel , and these options are seen to be ' too organised '

Tell them to do something , they will do anything to not do it.

Perhaps we allow teenagers too much freedom, Ill be honest what parent allows their 12-13-14 YO out until 11-12 at night ?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Why are you asking us? Why not ask them?

Nevyn

Davidth88 wrote: »

Perhaps we allow teenagers too much freedom, Ill be honest what parent allows their 12-13-14 YO out until 11-12 at night ?

Ones who want the kids out of the house and away from them and don't care enough to have them at home.

Davidth88

Thaedydal wrote: »

Ones who want the kids out of the house and away from them and don't care enough to have them at home.

Don't think it's as simple as that , its easy to say that ( I think and say it all the time too ) . But I am sure you have kids who have said they are somewhere , but are actually somewhere else, others where the parents have to work etc etc.

I hope when my little one gets to be that age I have the wisdom of Soloman

The trouble is , you get a gang of 10-20-30 teenagers together , and you will get mischief , ( or anti social behaviour as they call it now ).

I applaud the Scouts/Youth Clubs/Gaa etc who try their best.

Nevyn

A child under the age of 15 out roaming at 10/11 at night is not on imho.
Mine have never been let roam the street and currently don't lie about where they are going to be, with the eldest being 12 I know that the difficulties of teen age years are ahead of us but still I wasn't allowed roam the streets either or hang out on street corners and I will be adopting the same policy myself.

It is very sad to see kids out hanging around at night esp when the weather is miserable
makes me wonder how bad home must be if they school that over it.

Deliverance

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

Why are you asking us? Why not ask them?

Good suggestion. I am asking 'you' because I am looking for some feedback and support from adults as a parent myself. Also I am living in an area where there are a large amount of teens with nothing to do. This leads to some gatherings and eventual 'mischief'.

I do think that with the economic downturn then the problems could go beyond 'mischief' into something more sinister.

If enough people feel the same way as mature adults then maybe it is an issue that is at large i.e. a problem which needs addressing?

Some good feedback so far which I appreciate. I can relate to the idea of having the friends over to enjoy themselves at a friendly supervised house. My own parents do this for all my younger siblings (provide sandwhiches etc), this really works for some and my family, especially my mum are v.respected in the community.

There is a v.ltd underfunded youth club initiative, this helps a bit. But as said previously teens like to rebel and don't like to be organised in this way.

Maybe it is as Thaeydal mentioned, some kids just have parents who just do not give a damn and want the kids young adults out of the house as much as possible. I do see some of them out in freezing weather and rain. Maybe these kids should be targeted in some kind of innovative initiative to get them to respect themselves by having an actual activitie that might fit them? After all it is an incredibly difficult age (I would not wish to go back to being a teen).

Thanks for the feedback so far it is encouraging.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

With teenagers, you either do what will attract them, or it will fail. While I appreciate you asking the parents of teenagers, it will be the teenagers who will decide what will or will not attract thenm off the corners.

Personally? I always thought something artistic. Making videos for example. Get them to make their own music video or horror video. Something compeltely different to what they´re used to.

smelltheglove

The hang out place is a good option, didnt work hugely for me as my dad wouldnt let boys even into the garden so in teen years when I wanted to hang out with boys we went around the green, mind we lived in a very nice area and there wasnt really much mischief going on. Still all girls were welcome, my dad was laid back enough about when they came over and tehy could stay whenever they wanted. My brother and his mates used to hang around the house often enough, it was liek a party house, they would all come back after the pub on a sat night and dad would have a fry up ready in the morning. Even though my younger brother doesnt live with my dad anymore he still goes up there with his pals often enough to have a game of pool or whatever and all of our friends found my dad very approachable with our house being a real comfort house. I would hope that I would have the same approach with my girls when they reach their teens, friendly with an element of respect, we never wanted to let our dad down so pretty much what he said went, none of us were ever in trouble and none of our friends were ever in trouble. I like the story above of the friends still visiting the mothers house years on, its not something that you see often and giving your children that 'haven' at home would most likely give them great memories.

John Mason

smelltheglove wrote: »

The hang out place is a good option, didnt work hugely for me as my dad wouldnt let boys even into the garden so in teen years when I wanted to hang out with boys we went around the green

i went to a mixed school from start to end, so i always had male friends so there was never a problem with them in the house

i remember back in the very early 80's, there was a community club for teenagers but it was closed down due to drinking and drugs.

they tried to re-start many, many times over the years but there was always the same problems.

i was given a time to be home, 8pm, i think and if i wasnt home, my parents would come looking for me - humiliating as ****, wasnt worth it

Deliverance

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

With teenagers, you either do what will attract them, or it will fail. While I appreciate you asking the parents of teenagers, it will be the teenagers who will decide what will or will not attract thenm off the corners.

Personally? I always thought something artistic. Making videos for example. Get them to make their own music video or horror video. Something completely different to what they´re used to.

Yes, that is a very good option I will look into that. If the local authorities will fund this then it will at least give them a starter. Video editing is an amazing skill easily learned for the teens interested as a form of expression.

It would certainly give them some kind of outlet to express themselves. More than that it will also give them a realisation of further options that are available education wise.

Good call Ickky Poo. Your input has been inspirational. Feel free to add more.

smelltheglove

Great idea, we had a music video made for our wedding dvd, highway to hell, would be a great example if you wanted to look at it, will have to find where to upload it though becuase youtube wont allow it because of copyright issues etc.

Deliverance

Haha sounds very cynical in that respect. I have done a recut or two as well. Video editing is an art that is fun and kind of expressive.

the_syco

How about beavers/cubs/scouts/ventures? Beavers start at 6 years old, ending with ventures at 17. It's usually on one night a week (usually the beavers is a Sunday morning for most places, it seems). More info @ http://www.scouts.ie

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Glad to help

Deliverance wrote: »

Haha sounds very cynical in that respect. I have done a recut or two as well. Video editing is an art that is fun and kind of expressive.

Doesn´t have to be expensive to start off with: couple of video cameras (some paretns might have these already) and head off on a field trip into the countryside to reinact Shrooms or Balir Witch or something. Editing software, might be expensive, I´´m not sure, but send a sponsorship letter or something to the Head Offices of some of the big software companies that operate locally.

Of course, they´ll have to write the scripts first, and that can be done for nothing at the local hang-out basement room.

Nevyn

The youthreach centres have programs for this.

Ever2010

Thaedydal wrote: »

A child under the age of 15 out roaming at 10/11 at night is not on imho.
Mine have never been let roam the street and currently don't lie about where they are going to be, with the eldest being 12 I know that the difficulties of teen age years are ahead of us but still I wasn't allowed roam the streets either or hang out on street corners and I will be adopting the same policy myself.

It is very sad to see kids out hanging around at night esp when the weather is miserable
makes me wonder how bad home must be if they school that over it.

I had a quite a large group of friends when I was a teenager and we did hang out on greens etc - mostly because there were too many of us to go into one person's house - nothing to do with any of us having bad homes!

Two parents had a room for their kids so if there were only 8/9 of us we'd watch a video (it was the mid 90's ), but in the Summer we'd play football etc and go for walks. We did go to some gigs that were for under 18s and to be honest we used to get into pubs purely so we had places to hang out - all sitting over 1 pint and some blackcurrant!

I never lied to my mother about where I was - even at free houses, she always knew - but kept it from Dad

Deliverance

Thaedydal wrote: »

The youthreach centres have programs for this.

Just had a look at their website... Seems like their online presence for a start is severely lacking. That could be a starter area to look at for a total re-design to make them more attractive socially online towards the audience that they are (not attracting at all at the moment).

Could then link them to Bebo, myspace etc once a decent enough site was up. Ideas are forming here by looking at the gaps in contact that are there.

So far from what has been suggested and said I feel that a stronger online presence would be one avenue worth exploring.

No teen would be attracted by this: http://www.youthreach.ie/

I reckon I could use most of my free time to make the site work better for a start.

Willbbz

I'd reckon if teenagers like myself could get jobs in this country it would solve this hanging around shops and off licenses thing :P Me and my friends do hang around places and then we're told to leave and we go somewhere else and then told to leave and go somewhere else and it really cycles like that :P Time and nothing to do with it, that's why I hang around boards when it's cold out ;D

Deliverance

WilliamOC wrote: »

I'd reckon if teenagers like myself could get jobs in this country it would solve this hanging around shops and off licenses thing :P Me and my friends do hang around places and then we're told to leave and we go somewhere else and then told to leave and go somewhere else and it really cycles like that :P Time and nothing to do with it, that's why I hang around boards when it's cold out ;D

Haha, that is a very good input. It must be incredibly frustrating to have to go through this daft 'move on' process.

It would be great to actually get some further feedback from you to actually try to at least make an attempt at doing something that was more interesting than hanging out with nothing to do. I would ask you to make a suggestion based on your experience.

I think that adults in general don't get it and see you guys as a threat especially when you gather in groups. I also think that teens see adults as v.judgemental (they are), but only through general ignorance. We are stupid in some ways.

I imagine that it is up to you guys to teach the adults for a change;)

Willbbz

Deliverance wrote: »

It would be great to actually get some further feedback from you to actually try to at least make an attempt at doing something that was more interesting than hanging out with nothing to do. I would ask you to make a suggestion based on your experience.

Well I said if there were jobs teenagers could work part time you would have a fraction of the 'nothing to do' with something to do#
Teenagers need money to DO stuff

Only other things I can think of would be; Sport clubs, gyms and cafés.

And anyone that wants my opinion for youth clubs. None of my friends go to any of them not because of it being 'too organised' kinda "rebelion" that I read earlier in this thread but because they seem kinda.. sad. Being socially awkward would be pinned to people that go to them. I'm not being mean towards people that do go to them but it seems to be the reality. - From my perspective so I wouldn't argue if you say I'm wrong

Deliverance

I think that you are right WilliamOC. Not enough funding or interest is being put into giving teens in urban areas something more to do. I think that the youth clubs etc that you mentioned do not cut it. They really just provide a pocket of same-ness within the same environment. That simpy does not work. Like you said it is not cool.

The funding at the moment to do something more should be there politically. This funding should in my opinion be put in place to do research into what the teens like and want. Then a lot more should be done by the same folks on what should and could be done (as experienced adults) by what would benefit teens with nothing to do.

Adults are the responsible parties in all of this. Instead of complaining, hiding and fearing about the behaviour of teens in general, maybe adults in general as responsible people / parents should be looking into ways of providing solutions and suggestions and more?

thesimpsons

as parent of 2 teens and another not far off that age, I find one of the biggest problems is lack of facilities open at evenings or weekends. I'm within city limits of Limerick and there are no public tennis courts, no public pitches of any sort (basketball, rugby, soccer), no swimming pools, no cinmeas, for the whole of my side of the city. Teens can't play ball in public parks, the clubs all have big locked gates on them, school playgrounds are out of bounds, there is one skateboard park and cycle lanes are so stop/start they are not much good. When I was young, we had a host of pitches avail to us cos no one was citing "insurance" at the drop of a hat, we had a public pool for the summer and 4 public playgrounds within close walking distance.

teens need somewhere to run about and burn off energy. Even joining a club (rugby/gaa/etc) isn't much help as they pitches are only open for training or matches and a teen who is just an average player doesn't get chosen for matches that they give up the sport sooner or later.

Mine were never allowed to just hang out when younger and they still don't do that. My house is open for anyone and its used alot in bad weather but garden space doesn't give them room to run off energy when its fine. Scouts are good but unfortuantely not seen as cool - my son still does it and has an absolutely ball camping out, hiking across mountains, canoeing, cooking, so much life skills he has gained from scouts, etc but he doesn't admit it in school that he does scouts.

Sleepy

I know 'the gaf' youth café worked quite well for my younger brother's generation in Galway. Most of his friends still drank or dabbled in soft drugs (not unusual considering most of them were a) Irish teenagers and b) musicians) but they weren't allowed to do either in or outside the café or treated in a judgemental fashion if they talked about it whilst in there.

I only saw the place whilst running music equipment in and out for them as an unpaid roadie but they seemed to be well set up offering counselling sessions, loads of leaflets about safe sex, unwanted pregnancies, alcohol, drugs, etc.

I think it was part funded by the HSE and the rest came from benefactors but I'm not certain of it. For those of you who remember the series, it always reminded me a bit of biker grove.

The likes of Foroige come up against the problem that they tend to be organised in parish halls etc. and in environments that actively put teenagers off. By setting up as a café and letting the teenagers run the social activities committees etc. to determine what they were going to do (usually led to gigs or battle of the bands etc. from what I could see) they put themselves in the position of being a safe place for the kids to hang out, where they could enjoy themselves, not be patronised and had access to lots of safety nets they may have been afraid to seek out elsewhere.

Herb Powell

now this could be controversial, but skateboarding is absolutely great.
obviously it's not for everyone, but for the teens who do try it out and like it, they will be hooked! it's a form of exercise, is constructive, it is suited to urban areas, and it gives a sense of freedom. You do not have to pay to go out and skate, and the most attractive thing I think is there is no coaches telling you what to do.
unfortunately, it's seen as anti-social behaviour by a lot of people, and skaters still get looked down upon. almost all skaters I've met have been genuinely decent young people, just looking to have some fun.
so yeah, skateboarding could be an option.

Deliverance

Herb Powell wrote: »

now this could be controversial, but skateboarding is absolutely great.
obviously it's not for everyone, but for the teens who do try it out and like it, they will be hooked! it's a form of exercise, is constructive, it is suited to urban areas, and it gives a sense of freedom. You do not have to pay to go out and skate, and the most attractive thing I think is there is no coaches telling you what to do.
unfortunately, it's seen as anti-social behaviour by a lot of people, and skaters still get looked down upon. almost all skaters I've met have been genuinely decent young people, just looking to have some fun.
so yeah, skateboarding could be an option.

Ah yeah I agree I know a few skateboarders and it is definately an urban sport. It is actually refreshing to me to see lads in some areas practising there art in open spaces in the city. I know a skateboard park was opened awhile back in my area but it didn't last long due to the cost of insurance.

Some of the tricks that they do are amazing, they make it look so easy. I borrowed a skateboard off a chap once and he tried to teach me how to do an 'olly', needless to say I almost fell on my ass.

Also the scout thing sounds excellent. Tis a shame that it is seen as 'uncool' when in reality it is actually great.

On hindsight and from reading these posts and from experience it does appear that there is lots to do for any teen to alleviate boredom in urban areas.

Therin lies the existing problem, 'some' teens just 'hang' and do nothing constuctive, consequently they cause problems by burning stuff and insult folks. They tend to not have stuff to do despite the fact that life is actually full of things to do.

Recently and interestingly I have noticed parents in my area behaving like teens with nothing to do. (Single Moms mostly), they do not take the kids out for walks, to parks or events. They seem to hang around with the kids in view and only seem to get up in the middle of the day wearing pyjamas and smoking ciggies whilst chatting to similar Moms. To me they look like no hopers who have got the council flat and are settling for that lifestyle i.e. got me flat or house, now I can settle back into depression without realising it.

One Mom in particular kicks the young chap out for the day and doesn't let him back in despite the little chap swearing and kicking at the door for 10mins, he urinates in the back hall at times due to lack of access.

Maybe they (the parents) should be given something more to do in this respect? I'm not sure what activities would be suitable for these single parents. But I imagine that in some way they are the source of the problem potentially?

r3nu4l

Give them some interests that can be done anytime, day or night.

Football clubs are great and all but once training is over for the night, that's it.

When I was a teenager myself and my mates used to meet in the large (block built) shed in our garden every Sunday from 5PM until 10PM, playing role-playing games. Nerdy? hell yes. Kept us off the streets? Hell yes!

Get kids involved in a band?
Scouts? (largest ever recruitment in the UK in the past two years!)
DVD movie or gaming nights in each other's houses on Fridays etc.

Some of those ideas will work for some kids and not for others, the point is that there's loads of things out there but finding the right thing is difficult imo.

Herb Powell

Deliverance wrote: »

Ah yeah I agree I know a few skateboarders and it is definately an urban sport. It is actually refreshing to me to see lads in some areas practising there art in open spaces in the city. I know a skateboard park was opened awhile back in my area but it didn't last long due to the cost of insurance.

Some of the tricks that they do are amazing, they make it look so easy. I borrowed a skateboard off a chap once and he tried to teach me how to do an 'olly', needless to say I almost fell on my ass.

Also the scout thing sounds excellent. Tis a shame that it is seen as 'uncool' when in reality it is actually great.

On hindsight and from reading these posts and from experience it does appear that there is lots to do for any teen to alleviate boredom in urban areas.

Therin lies the existing problem, 'some' teens just 'hang' and do nothing constuctive, consequently they cause problems by burning stuff and insult folks. They tend to not have stuff to do despite the fact that life is actually full of things to do.

Recently and interestingly I have noticed parents in my area behaving like teens with nothing to do. (Single Moms mostly), they do not take the kids out for walks, to parks or events. They seem to hang around with the kids in view and only seem to get up in the middle of the day wearing pyjamas and smoking ciggies whilst chatting to similar Moms. To me they look like no hopers who have got the council flat and are settling for that lifestyle i.e. got me flat or house, now I can settle back into depression without realising it.

One Mom in particular kicks the young chap out for the day and doesn't let him back in despite the little chap swearing and kicking at the door for 10mins, he urinates in the back hall at times due to lack of access.

Maybe they (the parents) should be given something more to do in this respect? I'm not sure what activities would be suitable for these single parents. But I imagine that in some way they are the source of the problem potentially?

I agree with ya there, going out to the woods/wherever for a few days was mad craic