The Breast Feeding Support Thread

galah

Someone please tell me things will get better soon

We've been up feeding every 2 to 3 hours, day and night, for the past 4 months (before that it was more often, babba is 5.5 months now). I can't do much more of this, I'm so exhausted I could cry if I had the energy. I've been trying to give him a bottle, no joy (tried all the tricks such as leaving the house so that hubby could do it etc) and slowly started solids, also no joy, he's just not interested. Any wise words? I just need some decent sleep soon, I'm turning into a health and safety issue as I'm totally zombiefied

If I'd known that we would have problems giving him a bottle I would have started a lot sooner, but obvs breastfeeding was going so well I didnt wanna mess with it (had a bit of a hangup about it as it was so hard with our first, and this time it was just so easy and enjoyable - the feeding part, not the frequency).

How Strange

Oh dear galah you have my empathy and sympathy. I've been there on my 2nd so I really understand your exhaustion and frustration. It does change around 6 months once you introduce solids. Perhaps try some solids now if you haven't already. I personally don't see a reason to hold off 2 weeks to the illusive 6 months. Hopefully within a month or so the solids will be somewhat established so night feeds might decrease.

Other than that all I can suggest is cosleeping. It really was my only lifeline and I'd have gone stir crazy without it.

Obviously, if you can, rest during the day and try get lie ins at the weekends etc when your partner is at home.

Also are you taking a supplement because you're probably drained and run down. I found floradix fantastic and I'd really recommend it. Don't underestimate what a negative effect being run down can have on you psychologically.

I'm sorry, I wish I could tell you it'll magically improve but it will change gradually over the next couple of months.

Btw well done on getting this far!

Bagheera

galah wrote: »

Someone please tell me things will get better soon

We've been up feeding every 2 to 3 hours, day and night, for the past 4 months (before that it was more often, babba is 5.5 months now). I can't do much more of this, I'm so exhausted I could cry if I had the energy. I've been trying to give him a bottle, no joy (tried all the tricks such as leaving the house so that hubby could do it etc) and slowly started solids, also no joy, he's just not interested. Any wise words? I just need some decent sleep soon, I'm turning into a health and safety issue as I'm totally zombiefied

If I'd known that we would have problems giving him a bottle I would have started a lot sooner, but obvs breastfeeding was going so well I didnt wanna mess with it (had a bit of a hangup about it as it was so hard with our first, and this time it was just so easy and enjoyable - the feeding part, not the frequency).

Galah I'm in the exact same boat as you, even with my first being a disaster with feeding versus easy second time around. I haven't much advice as I was ready to run very far away yesterday! I started solids yesterday and I suppose like everything it takes time.

You could try tonight sleeping in the spare room with earplugs, and letting your partner try to settle your little one for the first night waking. My hubby has done that a few times and often it doesn't work and I have to feed anyway, but sometimes it gets an extra hours stretch out of him which gives you more unbroken sleep. Also we tried the bottle from around 8 weeks and he didn't take one for months. He will now take around 2oz but not much more.

If you need to vent feel free to PM me as I know exactly how you feel unfortunately

Sligo1

Galah you poor thing. I don't really have a lot of advice but can only empathise really. The little bit if advice I do have is maybe try her with the spoon. At 5.5 months he's definitely old enough.

My LO is 15 weeks now and after 6 weeks of trying to get her to take a bottle of EBM she's only just starting! I was persecuted with it and couldn't leave the house or go anywhere without her! So I know the feeling. The only saving grace was that she's not a bad sleeper and only wakes once at night... So I can only imagine how uou must be feeling with the lack of sleep! It was finally the MAM bottles that worked for us. But she still comes looking for the boob to put her back to sleep... Which I know is a habit we need to break.

At my PHN checkup the last week (when LO still wasn't properly taking the bottle)... Phn said to start trying her with a bit of solids at 16 weeks. I was a kit taken back as i thought breast fed babies needed to wait till around the 24 week mark. But she said anytime between 16-24 weeks for breast or formula fed babies is grand and just to start when we think she is ready. I'm not going to start before 20 weeks anyway. But maybe it something you could consider at 5.5 months just to get that little bit extra stretch in your sleep.

How Strange

Sligo1 it's such a shame that these phns are still giving their own opinions as official advice. As I said to galah, I think 5.5 months is pretty much the same as 6 months so start giving tastes if the baby is interested but 16 weeks :0

As you know yourself you've got the perfect food for your baby right now so how could baby rice or a spoon of carrot have any benefits nutritionally?

Sligo1

How Strange wrote: »

Sligo1 it's such a shame that these phns are still giving their own opinions as official advice. As I said to galah, I think 5.5 months is pretty much the same as 6 months so start giving tastes if the baby is interested but 16 weeks :0

As you know yourself you've got the perfect food for your baby right now so how could baby rice or a spoon of carrot have any benefits nutritionally?

Yes I would totally agree with you! That's why I was taken back when she said 4 months or 16 weeks! I said to her I thought I needed to wait till the 6 months so her little digestive system is a bit more mature but she said I didn't need to! Anyways she's a really happy little baby at the moment and seems to be happy with what she is getting so I'm definitely not going to jump into giving her anything else in the next while. I may re evaluate at around the 5-6 month mark... But definitely not before. .

galah

Quick update, babba now takes some solids (fruit purée and baby rice, given at lunchtime and before bed), but it's not making a blind bit of difference to his sleep patterns. He still wants the boob every three hours, day and night.

How Strange

Hopefully he'll settle down a bit when he gets past 6 months. There's a series of sleep regressions and developmental leaps between 4-6 months. My son slept through the night for the first time at 7 months and he was an awful sleeper between 4-6 months.

Starting them on food made no difference to mine feeding a lot either but it does help with some babies.

kandr10

Yeah solids didn't make a difference here until she was on proper 3meals, 3 big meals. Took about a month for her to give up a feed and another month to give up the next. Down to 4-5 a day now which is a bit better!

detoxkid

My daughter is six weeks old today. I'm exclusively breastfeeding her. I think I'm starting to get run down from the lack of sleep/broken sleep. And I've just woke up with awful heartburn. Anyone else get this when breastfeeding? Maybe there is no connection at all. Should I keep breastfeeding when feeling off or do I risk her getting sick by doing this?

How Strange

Well done on getting to 6 weeks. It's definitely the toughest stage of breastfeeding and things will start getting easier, bit by bit, from now on.

Definitely continue feeding even if you're not feeling 100% as there's very few times when a mothers health or an illness affects breastfeeding. Your little baby will only get the goodness and if you're fighting a virus she'll also get the antibodies to give her immunity.

Are you getting enough rest? When you're breastfeeding a newborn you really have to take it easy and rest (daytime naps if you can or at least feet up on the sofa) as much as you can. I know we always see these super women out in shopping centres or wherever doing 50 things at once with tiny babies but I was never like that. I tried on my son and I got very rundown so on my daughter I just slowed everything down and slept as much as I could.

Talk to a pharmacist about taking a multivitamin supplement. You can't take ginseng when breastfeeding so get one without that. I used to take a sona one.

I hope you feel better soon and congrats in your little baby

contrary_mary

detoxkid wrote: »

My daughter is six weeks old today. I'm exclusively breastfeeding her. I think I'm starting to get run down from the lack of sleep/broken sleep. And I've just woke up with awful heartburn. Anyone else get this when breastfeeding? Maybe there is no connection at all. Should I keep breastfeeding when feeling off or do I risk her getting sick by doing this?

My son was six weeks on Monday and just this week I've been feeling very run down too. I think the exhaustion is catching up on me - I have aches in my legs and back and I'm blaming the sleep deprivation. He's still feeding around the clock - the PHN said he "should' be starting to stretch out his feeds but no sign yet! I must take above advice and get myself a multivitamin.

How Strange

I'd be wary of anyone saying your baby *should* be doing x, y or z especially when it comes to feeding. Unfortunately they're all individuals and they do as they please. I say this as a mother of a baby who couldn't sleep more than 3 hours at a time without waking for a snack. My son did stretch out his feeds even by 6 weeks and by 5 months he'd go up to 6-7 hours without feeding during the day and night. He was my first so you can imagine how confused I was with my second.

Telling a mother what their baby *should* be doing can set her up for disappointment.

detoxkid

How Strange wrote: »

Well done on getting to 6 weeks. It's definitely the toughest stage of breastfeeding and things will start getting easier, bit by bit, from now on.

Definitely continue feeding even if you're not feeling 100% as there's very few times when a mothers health or an illness affects breastfeeding. Your little baby will only get the goodness and if you're fighting a virus she'll also get the antibodies to give her immunity.

Are you getting enough rest? When you're breastfeeding a newborn you really have to take it easy and rest (daytime naps if you can or at least feet up on the sofa) as much as you can. I know we always see these super women out in shopping centres or wherever doing 50 things at once with tiny babies but I was never like that. I tried on my son and I got very rundown so on my daughter I just slowed everything down and slept as much as I could.

Talk to a pharmacist about taking a multivitamin supplement. You can't take ginseng when breastfeeding so get one without that. I used to take a sona one.

I hope you feel better soon and congrats in your little baby

Thanks a mill for the reply. This is such an encouraging thread and it really makes a huge difference to get a big of encouragement so thanks. Totally not following the advice of sleeping during the days guess I had an idea of what maternity leave would be like and wanted to make the most of it by getting out and about with her. Anyway I've fast learned thAt this approach doesn't work for me or my daughter!

olaola

detoxkid wrote: »

My daughter is six weeks old today. I'm exclusively breastfeeding her. I think I'm starting to get run down from the lack of sleep/broken sleep. And I've just woke up with awful heartburn. Anyone else get this when breastfeeding? Maybe there is no connection at all. Should I keep breastfeeding when feeling off or do I risk her getting sick by doing this?

From the start, I expressed a bottle & my husband gave this one to the baby at the '11pm' feed. The break meant so much to me in the early days. I think it was one of the reasons why I stuck at it! Even if I lay in the same room reading, mentally and physically it just gave me a bit of space. Now on the weekends he does the during the night feed too. Even though I have to wake to express, it's like a holiday feeling! Don't get me wrong, I love feeding my son, but I think the little breaks help me love it even more. And I don't feel as burdened with ALL of the responsibility.

Sligo1

olaola wrote: »

From the start, I expressed a bottle & my husband gave this one to the baby at the '11pm' feed. The break meant so much to me in the early days. I think it was one of the reasons why I stuck at it! Even if I lay in the same room reading, mentally and physically it just gave me a bit of space. Now on the weekends he does the during the night feed too. Even though I have to wake to express, it's like a holiday feeling! Don't get me wrong, I love feeding my son, but I think the little breaks help me love it even more. And I don't feel as burdened with ALL of the responsibility.

Olaola my 16 week old has just started taking bottles of expressed breast milk. She wouldn't take a bottle at all and has just started the last 2 weeks... Which is great as I can go out to the shops ect and not have to worry.

Thing is we are now giving her a bottle of EBM every night like yourself. mainly so she won't revert back to refusing the bottle altogether again... But I feel so guilty! It's really wierd... Even tho it's breast milk she's getting I still feel like I should be the one feeding her. Even tho the relief is massive and the time I now have to my self in the evening while Oh gives bottle is fantastic... I still feel really guilty. And I feel bad thinking that I might not be able to Feed her to sleep again or she might prefer the ease of the bottle or I just won't be able anymore...

Am I just a weirdo... Or has anyone else felt like this?

Isolt

olaola wrote: »

From the start, I expressed a bottle & my husband gave this one to the baby at the '11pm' feed. The break meant so much to me in the early days. I think it was one of the reasons why I stuck at it! Even if I lay in the same room reading, mentally and physically it just gave me a bit of space. Now on the weekends he does the during the night feed too. Even though I have to wake to express, it's like a holiday feeling! Don't get me wrong, I love feeding my son, but I think the little breaks help me love it even more. And I don't feel as burdened with ALL of the responsibility.

I'm really interested in hearing about your experience olaola. My baby is not born yet (due September) and I have always said I'd love to at least give breastfeeding a try. But now that I'm reading into it and checking out the support groups I must say I am second guessing everything. Some places seem really, really against using expressed milk. Some say don't express until at least 6 weeks, others say 12 weeks. Others say if you give them a bottle you'll confuse them and upset them etc.
It's very hard to know what's right. Ideally I'd love to feed him/her myself but have the option of having my oh give him/her a bottle every now and again. How can I achieve this without causing all of the confusion mentioned by bf support groups? Or without causing an affect to milk supply, which seems to be the other reason mentioned again and again. Surely expressing and feeding together would do no harm at all to supply?

kandr10

Isolt wrote: »

I'm really interested in hearing about your experience olaola. My baby is not born yet (due September) and I have always said I'd love to at least give breastfeeding a try. But now that I'm reading into it and checking out the support groups I must say I am second guessing everything. Some places seem really, really against using expressed milk. Some say don't express until at least 6 weeks, others say 12 weeks. Others say if you give them a bottle you'll confuse them and upset them etc.
It's very hard to know what's right. Ideally I'd love to feed him/her myself but have the option of having my oh give him/her a bottle every now and again. How can I achieve this without causing all of the confusion mentioned by bf support groups? Or without causing an affect to milk supply, which seems to be the other reason mentioned again and again. Surely expressing and feeding together would do no harm at all to supply?

I understand you're confusion. I was the same myself. I think the reason they suggest waiting 6weeks to pump is because your supply is all over the place until then. Basically the more the baby feeds or you pump, the more you'll produce. Since the baby's needs change quite a bit in the first 6weeks, you go through phases of overproducing and being slightly engorged. Pumping a lot along with this would exacerbate this effect.

There are various side effects of engorgement, like if you can't empty the breast you're at risk of getting mastitis. It can be a little uncomfortable too.

With all that in mind though, it's possible to make pumping work if you're careful about how you do it. If you're managing to feed your baby yourself for all feeds, as in there's no problems establishing breastfeeding, you could pump a little at a specific point in the day. The morning time tends to yield more milk for most women. Even if you only got an ounce or two, you can store them up until you've built up a full feed. Just be wary of taking too much in case it leaves you engorged. Through a bit of trial and error you'll get to know the right amount to express so that you're not left feeling uncomfortable.

If you have problems getting established, pumping is a great way to get a bit of breastmilk into the baby and to keep your supply going so that you can keep trying it.

As for the whole nipple teat confusion thing, I don't know if it's true. I pumped at the start cos I had problems then once we were established I stopped for a few weeks to let my supply settle. Then the baby started rejecting the bottles as she wasn't used to them when we tried to re introduce them. On my next I'll definitely be pumping a little from the start so that that doesn't happen. Awful to be in the situation where you feel you can't leave the baby cos they won't take bottles.

A lot of it is trial and error and learning what suits you and your baby so try to be open minded. Best of luck :-)

olaola

Isolt wrote: »

I'm really interested in hearing about your experience olaola. My baby is not born yet (due September) and I have always said I'd love to at least give breastfeeding a try. But now that I'm reading into it and checking out the support groups I must say I am second guessing everything. Some places seem really, really against using expressed milk. Some say don't express until at least 6 weeks, others say 12 weeks. Others say if you give them a bottle you'll confuse them and upset them etc.
It's very hard to know what's right. Ideally I'd love to feed him/her myself but have the option of having my oh give him/her a bottle every now and again. How can I achieve this without causing all of the confusion mentioned by bf support groups? Or without causing an affect to milk supply, which seems to be the other reason mentioned again and again. Surely expressing and feeding together would do no harm at all to supply?

Well! At the start, I had real issues - cracked nipples, intense pain. The expressing was more to give me respite for that one feed, I think I would have gone loopy without it.
Instead of trying to fit in expressing around his feeds, I used a formula bottle to get me into 'arrears' with expressing. So if he fed 8 times a day, my boobs only 'worked' 8 times a day - if you get me! So after using that one formula bottle, I'd pump that night & use that milk the following evening in a bottle & pump again, and so on. Otherwise, I'd be getting into a situation of trying to pump between feeds, which was extra effort I just wasn't interested in.
We never had any issues with nipple confusion. I'm very lucky with him, as my very lovely local midwife (& lactation consultant) called him a 'barracuda'! He'll eat anything from anything. I'm not sure if that's because I introduced them all early, or he's just a great little feeder. I also had to use nipple shields for a few weeks to let my nipples heal, while still feeding him.

So, what is right? What works for you, I reckon.

I am loath to give advice, but I would stop saying 'I'm going to try to breastfeed' and say that 'I am going to breastfeed'. There's really no reason why you can't! And as my midwife was very keen to tell me, and it is true, breastfeeding is hard. For me, it was harder than the whole pregnancy & birth. But he's 3 months now, and I wouldn't have it any other way. And to be honest, it's really only 'clicking' over the last few weeks.

Dr Jack Newman's website is great & the Kellymom one too for any questions you need answered in the middle of the night!

olaola

Sligo1 wrote: »

Olaola my 16 week old has just started taking bottles of expressed breast milk. She wouldn't take a bottle at all and has just started the last 2 weeks... Which is great as I can go out to the shops ect and not have to worry.

Thing is we are now giving her a bottle of EBM every night like yourself. mainly so she won't revert back to refusing the bottle altogether again... But I feel so guilty! It's really wierd... Even tho it's breast milk she's getting I still feel like I should be the one feeding her. Even tho the relief is massive and the time I now have to my self in the evening while Oh gives bottle is fantastic... I still feel really guilty. And I feel bad thinking that I might not be able to Feed her to sleep again or she might prefer the ease of the bottle or I just won't be able anymore...

Am I just a weirdo... Or has anyone else felt like this?

I possibly felt like this for a few mins while my husband was feeding him, then turned over in the bed, fell asleep and forgot all about it!

But in all seriousness, yes, I panicked that he'd only take the bottle then. But it was all unfounded. He doesn't seem to care one iota, as long as there's grub at the other side of the nipple - be it real or plastic!

kandr10

I've only just after 8 months discovered how to feed lying down. Could not for the life of me manage it before. Did not realise that one arm and shoulder on a pillow would be key! Duh!!!

ncmc

Another pumping question, baby is 6 weeks on Thursday and I'm trying to pump 2/3 oz every second day. So this morning I fed her on the right a and then straight away pumped on the left. She's due a feed shortly, should I feed on the side I pumped or feed from the same side as I did this morning?

Sligo1

kandr10 wrote: »

I've only just after 8 months discovered how to feed lying down. Could not for the life of me manage it before. Did not realise that one arm and shoulder on a pillow would be key! Duh!!!

It's amazing! Feeding lying down is what got me through the first couple weeks! She'd fall asleep beside me and we'd both get a few hours sleep. I'm not sure if have managed without that position in the early stages.

kandr10

ncmc wrote: »

Another pumping question, baby is 6 weeks on Thursday and I'm trying to pump 2/3 oz every second day. So this morning I fed her on the right a and then straight away pumped on the left. She's due a feed shortly, should I feed on the side I pumped or feed from the same side as I did this morning?

I do the same thing and I usually feed from the side I pumped. If my girl is fussing on the boob I try the other side. If you felt fuller on one side than the other go with the Fuller

kandr10

Sligo1 wrote: »

It's amazing! Feeding lying down is what got me through the first couple weeks! She'd fall asleep beside me and we'd both get a few hours sleep. I'm not sure if have managed without that position in the early stages.

It's genius! When I'd try it with her as a newborn I felt like I was smothering her! I feed her lying down now and when she's asleep do a nice scoop n drop manoeuvre into her cot :-)

Sligo1

kandr10 wrote: »

It's genius! When I'd try it with her as a newborn I felt like I was smothering her! I feed her lying down now and when she's asleep do a nice scoop n drop manoeuvre into her cot :-)

Yea I always felt I was smothering my son when I tried it with him. Was
Constantly putting pressure on my boob so i wasnt blocking his nostrils. But for whatever reason my daughter took to it really well and would sprawl put asleep when she'd had enough. Lol

Sligo1

Lol

http://whatmyfriendsthinkido.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/what-my-friends-think-I-do-what-I-actually-do-breastfeeding.jpg

kandr10

Sligo1 wrote: »

Lol

http://whatmyfriendsthinkido.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/what-my-friends-think-I-do-what-I-actually-do-breastfeeding.jpg

Brilliant! I swear at the start I would have tried no5 I went through that many positions to get going!

ncmc

Girls is it normal for babies to go through phases where they're not that interested in feeding? Christine is 6 weeks tomorrow and so far the BF has been going really well, she's happy and content, sleeps well and has increased her birth weight by 33%. But the last few days she hasn't been madly interested in feeding. Seems happy to sort of sit on the boob rather than feed. Plus I've felt her latch hasn't been as good.

Also this week I've been trying to pump a couple of oz every second day to build up a bit of a stash of expressed milk, but this morning I only got 1oz from one boob, whereas previously I would have got 3/4 oz no problem. I'm a bit worried my supply is drying up. I was waiting and prepared for the 6 week growth spurt, this is the last thing I was expecting!

How Strange

Boob has a sale on their fast good bras. I can't recommend these bras enough. I bought 6 in total for my year of breastfeeding; 2 x l, m and s and that's all I needed. They're feminine too as most of the breastfeeding bras, unless you spend a lot, are ugly.

http://shop.boobdesign.com/en/product/529/amnings-bh-fast-food-randig