The Breast Feeding Support Thread

bee06

Congrats and well done scarepanda! As probreastfeeding as I was pre baby I never knew “extended” bf was a thing and then it did take me a while to get my head around it. I always said I wanted to get to a year but the closer I get to it (he’s 8 months next week) the less I can imagine stopping.

shesty

Mystery egg you've had it tough.And honestly, you've done so well to get him to latch on.The only other piece of advice I will add is take to the bed and feed with skin to skin as much as possible.It encourages the baby to latch more often,I gather.I have had variations on your experience (two) and the advice given to me to up supply/relactate was to pump ten mins on each breast (or together) regularly during the day, loads of water, take fenugreek tablets every day, and there is a tiny tube you can get that you put one end in the bottle, and the other end at your nipple, and baby takes in the nipple and tube together-when he sucks he gets formula from the bottle through the tube, and breastmilk, encouraging him to suck longer and increase your supply until you can gradually wean him off it.I was advised to get it on my second and I was given it on my third...it didn't work on him for other reasons, but I can see how it would work.
The colic thing, I have had it particularly with my first and third, who is an incredibly windy baby.Just take each day as it comes, and be sure to swop out with your partner whenever you can when baby is screaming.The biggest thing to remember is that it's not your fault and in a couple of weeks it will pass...honestly.Even if it seems like forever.

scarepanda

I was the same bee06, sure I barely made it home from the hospital! I never envisioned going past 3 months if I'm honest, but then we were on a roll (aside from PHN worries), so said I'd try go to 6 months, then that vaguely went to a year and then very quickly in my own head it went to 2 yrs, although I took a long time to admit it, even to my husband. I'm not sure if I ever really stated for definite that I wanted to go to 2 yrs other than to him and one really good friend. I decided a few months ago when I was going to finish up, which was a good thing I think as Iv actually found it a lot easier emotionally than I initially thought I would. She hasn't looked for boobs either though which has made it a lot easier. She's happy out with her book.

One comment that remembered reading here was about how it's completely normal and somewhat expected to see a toddler with a bottle, even if it's just at bedtime, but seen as weird/not normal, and dare I say it, not 'natural' to see a toddler still being breastfed. It really made me think about perceptions regarding what's normal/not normal with breatsfeeding and extended nursing.

lazygal

All breastfeeding is good, whether its for a day, a week, a month a year or longer. I was so uninformed on my first, I really hadn't a clue and fell prey to the misconceptions. I'm due my third next month and I'll feed as long as it works for the baby/toddler/child and me. I'm hoping this time around to make expressing work if possible, so I've a hakaa pump and one bottle ready for the six week mark and money set aside for some nice new nursing bras.

Millem

Scarepanda well done!
I have made it to the 1 year mark. Am thrilled
Going back to work soon....no idea how I will manage it as still feeding every 4 hours but apparently boobs are just magic and figure it out!!

fits

Millem wrote: »

but apparently boobs are just magic and figure it out!!

They do! Im back at work since January and still feeding away. They are 20 months old now. :eek:

jlm29

They totally figure it out, you’ll be fine. I’m quite keen to stop feeding now, I’m a bit over it. I’ve no idea how to manage it though, without introducing a bottle, which seems crazy at 14 months.

jlm29

They totally figure it out, you’ll be fine. I’m quite keen to stop feeding now, I’m a bit over it. I’ve no idea how to manage it though, without introducing a bottle, which seems crazy at 14 months.

scarepanda

At 14 months why would you need to introduce a bottle? I would just put all fluids in a beaker rather than a bottle. We've loved the 360 cups in this house if that's any help.

jlm29

scarepanda wrote: »

At 14 months why would you need to introduce a bottle? I would just put all fluids in a beaker rather than a bottle. We've loved the 360 cups in this house if that's any help.

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

scarepanda

Ah right, I thought you meant generally during the day. I personally don't see any point in introducing a bottle once they are old enough to start using a beaker. But that's just me.

For your situation, could you change up bed time routine, have boob before brushing teeth and gradually change to beaker, so he's full before going up to the room and then reading a book/having a chat/singing songs before going down to bed? We always and boob after teeth, and a mixture of chat/singing/story after boobs. The last while we have been reading a story before bed and then allowing her to bring her book into the cot with her. She 'reads' to her teddies before going down to sleep. Even though she has a late enough bedtime, sometimes she's not tired enough going straight to sleep when she's put into the cot. But the book keeps her occuy enough while she's switching off. She keeps going if we're around.

catrionanic

jlm29 wrote: »

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

Do you mean he won't go to bed without boob first, or that he won't settle after night time waking without boob?

jlm29

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

Do you mean he won't go to bed without boob first, or that he won't settle after night time waking without boob?

Mainly night time waking. He has occasionally settled for the night with neither a bottle or boob, but during the night, he will not settle back to sleep if the goods are withheld!

catrionanic

jlm29 wrote: »

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

Do you mean he won't go to bed without boob first, or that he won't settle after night time waking without boob?

Mainly night time waking. He has occasionally settled for the night with neither a bottle or boob, but during the night, he will not settle back to sleep if the goods are withheld!

We also had that problem with our little man. The best way to solve it was to get daddy to settle him. If he saw me, he was never going to go to sleep without boob.

You could also try a bottle for a little while. Milk for a week or two, then watered down milk, then just water - they soon stop waking when they're no longer getting the goods.

Best of luck.

Millem

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

Do you mean he won't go to bed without boob first, or that he won't settle after night time waking without boob?

Mainly night time waking. He has occasionally settled for the night with neither a bottle or boob, but during the night, he will not settle back to sleep if the goods are withheld!

We also had that problem with our little man. The best way to solve it was to get daddy to settle him. If he saw me, he was never going to go to sleep without boob.

You could also try a bottle for a little while. Milk for a week or two, then watered down milk, then just water - they soon stop waking when they're no longer getting the goods.

Best of luck.

catriona how long would let him cry for? We tried this but he just was hysterical so I ended up feeding:(
My breastfeeding group leader tells me he “just has a need for milk at night”

Last week he was feeding every 90 mins at night for maybe 20 mins this week we are back to 3-4 hours!! Going back to work properly in 2 weeks!!!

catrionanic

Millem wrote: »

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

catrionanic wrote: »

jlm29 wrote: »

He won’t settle at night with anything less than a boob (or a bottle the odd time I’m not here). I don’t want to start giving him bottles all the time, but I don’t want to be pacing the floors every night with a screaming baby

Do you mean he won't go to bed without boob first, or that he won't settle after night time waking without boob?

Mainly night time waking. He has occasionally settled for the night with neither a bottle or boob, but during the night, he will not settle back to sleep if the goods are withheld!

We also had that problem with our little man. The best way to solve it was to get daddy to settle him. If he saw me, he was never going to go to sleep without boob.

You could also try a bottle for a little while. Milk for a week or two, then watered down milk, then just water - they soon stop waking when they're no longer getting the goods.

Best of luck.

catriona how long would let him cry for? We tried this but he just was hysterical so I ended up feeding:(
My breastfeeding group leader tells me he “just has a need for milk at night”

Last week he was feeding every 90 mins at night for maybe 20 mins this week we are back to 3-4 hours!! Going back to work properly in 2 weeks!!!

How old is he? Obviously as they get older they feed less. But if you're going back to work, he may feed more in the night to make up for reduced daytime feeds unfortunately.

We don't really do cry it out, because we live in a little terraced house with thin walls so don't think it's fair on the neighbours, so unfortunately I've no advice on that one.

Often with breastfeeding, it becomes a sleep association though- they don't know how to go back to sleep when they wake up unless they have boob. Have you tried googling this? Some mothers swear by introducing a wee comforter. You may also find that you need to change his bedtime routine, if you usually feed him to sleep. I had to stop this and start settling him by other means, and I think it helped night waking too.

Also, I can't emphasise enough how much better our boy settled for his dad than for me!!

Millem

Catriona he is 1 year old!

jlm29

I tried to settle him with no boobs a couple of weeks ago when he woke at 1am. He was having none of it!! I lasted an hour and a half, where I offered him a cup of milk, a bottle of water, a soother (he actually hurled that across the room in temper!). Eventually I gave in and gave him a boob.

shesty

Millem,the boob is his way of going back to sleep!!!It's his soother.
Wouldn't suggest crying it out, but maybe start breaking the connection between boob and sleep at bedtime first....does he feed to sleep at bedtime??
Speaking as a mum whose kids never fed to sleep from about 3 weeks old.(they were too nosey and too windy!!!!).If you can break the connection between sleep and milk, and let hin figure out how to fall asleep himself, that's the best way to work it

scarepanda

Jlm, he knows your breaking point!

What I would say is firstly work on falling to sleep without boob at bedtime, get that sorted and it'll be easier to work on middle of the night wakes. You need to stick to your guns though!

What I did with my girl (although admittedly I did do it from an earlier age) was to slowly work towards getting baby into cot a little less sleepy each night. I think I broke it down to about 4 stages of sleepiness (fully asleep, just about to fall asleep, almost awake and fully awake) and waited until she was happy with each stage before moving on. At first, she did kick up stink, but it was a whinge as opposed to a cry and only lasted at most 10 mins for her on a bad night. If she was getting to the stage of crying I went up and calmed her down, rince and repeat untill there was no whinging (without really interacting with her and giving her the reward she was looking for). It's hard listening to them whinge, and my husband used to find it awful hard, but it worked and didn't take her too long to figure out the whole settling down business on her own. Now, if she wakes at night, I'll wait and see how she goes and give her a couple of minutes before going into her, she usually settles back down herself. The almost alseep stage is the hardest because they don't know how to fall asleep themselves and will try their hardest to get your attention and sympathy and boob! But once my girl started to figure it out, the last couple of stages were a lot easier and quicker.

At 14 months id probably introduce a book between boob and cot also, maybe a favourite toy or teddy? My girl has been going to bed with her book for a good few months now and loves going into the cot to 'read' to her two teddies.

Toots

Just wondering did anyone else have a huge delay in getting their period back after the birth, while breastfeeding? My daughter will be 7 months on Friday and still no sign of mine. Even went so far as to take a pregnancy test just in case (negative) After I had my son my period came back after about 8 weeks, but I wasn't able to breastfeed him so I'm not really comparing like with like

hollymartins

Toots wrote: »

Just wondering did anyone else have a huge delay in getting their period back after the birth, while breastfeeding? My daughter will be 7 months on Friday and still no sign of mine. Even went so far as to take a pregnancy test just in case (negative) After I had my son my period came back after about 8 weeks, but I wasn't able to breastfeed him so I'm not really comparing like with like

I was the same Toots, I breastfed for nearly 8 months and my period only returned when I stopped feeding.

jelly&icecream

Toots wrote: »

Just wondering did anyone else have a huge delay in getting their period back after the birth, while breastfeeding? My daughter will be 7 months on Friday and still no sign of mine. Even went so far as to take a pregnancy test just in case (negative) After I had my son my period came back after about 8 weeks, but I wasn't able to breastfeed him so I'm not really comparing like with like

.
I think it was 9 months or so when mine retuned last time. Completely normal.

bee06

I’m 8 months in and nothing either. I think it has to do with the frequency of feeding?

jlm29

I can’t remember on my first, but on my second, it came back at 6 months, and it was 9 on my third I think! It’s definitely common for it to be delayed with feeding. I’m sure you know, but you could get pregnant with the first egg that’s released, so before your period returns at all, so if you don’t want another, be careful!

Millem

Toots wrote: »

Just wondering did anyone else have a huge delay in getting their period back after the birth, while breastfeeding? My daughter will be 7 months on Friday and still no sign of mine. Even went so far as to take a pregnancy test just in case (negative) After I had my son my period came back after about 8 weeks, but I wasn't able to breastfeed him so I'm not really comparing like with like

Yes my son is 1 and still no sign! Still feeding during the night

catrionanic

Yes I think it depends on how good a sleeper your baby is!!!! If you have longer breaks between feeds, your period will return sooner.

I got mine back at 9 months(and two periods later, I was pregnant again....!). Apparently the average is 8 months, but anything up to 18 months is normal.

scarepanda

8 months for me and it came back after madam started increasing her solids and reduced a feed

Toots

jlm29 wrote: »

I can’t remember on my first, but on my second, it came back at 6 months, and it was 9 on my third I think! It’s definitely common for it to be delayed with feeding. I’m sure you know, but you could get pregnant with the first egg that’s released, so before your period returns at all, so if you don’t want another, be careful!

Thanks guys, that's put my mind at ease!

We've been using contraception since we started having sex again but I can't use hormonal contraceptives so it's condoms only, which was grand until it transpired that they were the ones that Durex had to recall! Affected batch and everything! :eek: I think it's just a bit unnerving when my period tracker app saying 466 days since my last period :pac:

Happydippy

Toots wrote: »

Thanks guys, that's put my mind at ease!

We've been using contraception since we started having sex again but I can't use hormonal contraceptives so it's condoms only, which was grand until it transpired that they were the ones that Durex had to recall! Affected batch and everything! :eek: I think it's just a bit unnerving when my period tracker app saying 466 days since my last period :pac:

My little girl was 17 months old when I got my first period and they were bit irregular for a few months. Think it depends on how often they breastfeed as well as your own hormones.
Talk to your gp about contraception as I think some types of pill are safe when breastfeeding. Although, like you, we stuck to condoms just in case. Not that there was much time for sex between work, tiredness and a toddler who liked to nurse once or twice a night then sleep in the middle of our bedðŸ˜.