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First Time!

124678

Comments

  • #152
    whadabouchasir
    Registered Users Posts: 942 ✭✭✭whadabouchasir


    orourkeda wrote: »
    A cucumber will do.
    Reminds me of the time someone lefta cucmber and tub of vaseline at the self service checkout in my local tesco.


  • #153
    clikityclak
    Registered Users Posts: 470 ✭✭clikityclak


    Wolfbagging... I'm still laughing!
    :pac:


  • #154
    LD 50
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,559 ✭✭✭LD 50


    whadabouchasir wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time someone lefta cucmber and tub of vaseline at the self service checkout in my local tesco.

    Reminds me off the time a guy in front of me in the queue bought a cucumber, vaseline, and Nuts magazine.


  • #155
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    OP, just stick it in her pooper!


  • #156
    Millicent
    Registered Users Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    LD 50 wrote: »
    Reminds me off the time a guy in front of me in the queue bought a cucumber, vaseline, and Nuts magazine.

    Swear to God, I have it on good authority that someone came into the store I worked in at night (after midnight), bought a cucumber, left and came back about 5 minutes later to buy one of those Durex Play vibrating willy rings. DIY dirtiness!


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  • #157
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    This thread has so much gold in it.

    Op, just make sure she cums first and you're set.
    After the first time, you turn it into a game.

    I remember my first time buying rubbers, I was petrified and thought I was going to get weird looks off the girl at the till. It ended up being like I was buying a packet of crisps, barely even took notice of my existence.

    Consider yourself lucky you can just pop down to the shops to buy them... Uugh!!


  • #158
    Bolag_the_2nd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,224 ✭✭✭Bolag_the_2nd


    is tonight the night then, remember, no pressure, just cos every poster in A/H is there with you, relax, it will be grand, just dont shout out Bolag when ur jizzin, try not to look at your oh and think of wellallhavetea ;)


  • #159
    LD 50
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,559 ✭✭✭LD 50


    Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »
    is tonight the night then, remember, no pressure, just cos every poster in A/H is there with you(watching), relax, it will be grand, just dont shout out Bolag when ur jizzin, try not to look at your oh and think of wellallhavetea ;)
    ;)


  • #160
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »
    is tonight the night then, remember, no pressure, just cos every poster in A/H is there with you, relax, it will be grand, just dont shout out Bolag when ur jizzin, try not to look at your oh and think of wellallhavetea ;)
    Try not to shout any random things :pac:

    I remember when I was 15 I said glasses :o

    Dunno why though and never will. Good thing she was finished :p


  • #161
    Real FM
    Registered Users Posts: 239 ✭✭Real FM


    Do the superman. Afterwards when she's asleep jiz on her back. At some stage she'll role over onto her back...and in the morning hey presto, the bed sheet turns into a cape.


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  • #162
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    OP, its probably going to be lackluster and awkward the first time.

    But the second time when your bodies get comfortable with each other and are in sync... mmmmmmmm!!


  • #163
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    I don't think I've ever shouted anything, years of silent masturbation has made me rather quiet in bed.
    Ah, it's better than keeping the rest of the house awake...

    You know, the usual.
    Mad sexy. :cool:


    I feel sorry for my GF, I am the least sexiest person in the world.


  • #164
    epgc3fyqirnbsx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,228 ✭✭✭epgc3fyqirnbsx


    You'll get some good tips here OP ;)


  • #165
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    CianRyan wrote: »

    I feel sorry for my GF, I am the least sexiest person in the world.


    You should give her a treat - wear one of these....

    http://members.optusnet.com.au/~ba8/mypic117.jpg


  • #166
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    You should give her a treat - wear one of these....

    http://members.optusnet.com.au/~ba8/mypic117.jpg
    Whatever you're in to :confused:


  • #167
    Doyler92
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,664 ✭✭✭Doyler92


    Jayson Stale Stork wrote: »
    Did you meet her through Facebook? If so watch out for syphilis.


    Don't know the OP or his girlfriend but I'm pretty sure her name is not syphillis


  • #168
    m5ex9oqjawdg2i
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,221 ✭✭✭✭m5ex9oqjawdg2i


    So, OP... how was it? Go on, tell us what happened... did you spiderman her? Did she love it? ;)


  • #169
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    You should give her a treat - wear one of these....

    http://members.optusnet.com.au/~ba8/mypic117.jpg

    But sure, that would just be adding materiel.

    If I try and spice it up in anyway, it'll be through Pokémon!


  • #170
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    CianRyan wrote: »
    I don't think I've ever shouted anything, years of silent masturbation has made me rather quiet in bed.
    Ah, it's better than keeping the rest of the house awake...

    You know, the usual.
    Mad sexy. :cool:


    I feel sorry for my GF, I am the least sexiest person in the world.

    You ARE mad sexy. :)


  • #171
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    Bonito wrote: »
    Whatever you're in to :confused:

    More like hanging out of in one of those yokes.


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  • #172
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    CianRyan wrote: »
    If I try and spice it up in anyway, it'll be through Pokémon!

    Buy blue body paint and make her dress up as mudkips


  • #173
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    Buy blue body paint and make her dress up as mudkips
    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    You ARE mad sexy. :)

    Here, you heard the man!


  • #174
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    CianRyan wrote: »
    Here, you heard the man!

    Note taken.


  • #175
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    Note taken.

    Just google Mudkip Girl for inspiration :D


  • #176
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    Just google Mudkip Girl for inspiration :D

    I just did, hahahaha...
    My WHOLE body!?
    It's not even attractive. But whatever.


  • #177
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    I just did, hahahaha...
    My WHOLE body!?
    It's not even attractive. But whatever.
    Google "that's not sexy" Then click I'm feeling lucky ;)


  • #178
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    Bonito wrote: »
    Google "that's not sexy" Then click I'm feeling lucky ;)

    Unfortunately I already googled that after seeing it earlier in this post.
    I puked.


  • #179
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    Unfortunately I already googled that after seeing it earlier in this post.
    I puked.
    You get a thank for that :D

    How awesome am I. Bet you all hate me now. :pac:


  • #180
    landsleaving
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,345 ✭✭✭landsleaving


    Bonito wrote: »
    You get a thank for that :D

    How awesome am I. Bet you all hate me now. :pac:

    Why yes, yes I do.


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  • #181
    landsleaving
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,345 ✭✭✭landsleaving


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    I just did, hahahaha...
    My WHOLE body!?
    It's not even attractive. But whatever.

    If ever the phrase pics or gtfo was needed...

    :p

    you kids.


  • #182
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    Bonito wrote: »
    You get a thank for that :D

    How awesome am I. Bet you all hate me now. :pac:

    Correct. :D

    Google "Who's the cutest" and click I'm feeling lucky.
    Everyone will love me for this. :)


  • #183
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    Gummy Panda wrote: »
    Just google Mudkip Girl for inspiration :D

    Tbh.
    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    Unfortunately I already googled that after seeing it earlier in this post.
    I puked.


    Haaa! :D
    That is now all I'm going to think of when I see you, I love my brain...


  • #184
    efb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    Ask her if mum wants to watch.

    Then ask her to join in.

    Cougartown baby.


  • #185
    orourkeda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,918 ✭✭✭✭orourkeda


    Have you rode her yet?


  • #186
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    landsleaving wrote: »
    If ever the phrase pics or gtfo was needed...

    :p

    you kids.


    I'll hide the camera in my room. ;)


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  • #187
    orourkeda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,918 ✭✭✭✭orourkeda


    whadabouchasir wrote: »
    Reminds me of the time someone lefta cucmber and tub of vaseline at the self service checkout in my local tesco.

    Was it a bloke or a bird?


  • #188
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    CianRyan wrote: »
    Tbh.




    Haaa! :D
    That is now all I'm going to think of when I see you, I love my brain...

    Pikachu is WAY better to dress up as!


  • #189
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    Correct. :D

    Google "Who's the cutest" and click I'm feeling lucky.
    Everyone will love me for this. :)
    That's an oldie but, I'll give you a thank anyway to be nice since you think I'm cute. ;)


  • #190
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    CianRyan wrote: »
    I'll hide the camera in my room. ;)

    YOU WILL NOT!


  • #191
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    CianRyan wrote: »
    I'll hide the camera in my room. ;)
    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    YOU WILL NOT!

    Am I missing something here? :confused:


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  • #192
    bullets
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,612 ✭✭✭bullets


    Did he ride her yet, I'm drunk at the moment while reading this thread reached page 4 before I skipped to latest post ?

    ~B


  • #193
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    Bonito wrote: »
    Google "that's not sexy" Then click I'm feeling lucky ;)

    OMG.... :mad:


  • #194
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    Bonito wrote: »
    Am I missing something here? :confused:

    Nope, I don't thinks so?


  • #195
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    GirlOfGlass wrote: »
    Nope, I don't thinks so?
    I'm on to you two.

    http://maninthemoon.today.com/files/2008/12/glaring-eyes.jpg


  • #196
    GirlOfGlass
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭GirlOfGlass


    Bonito wrote: »
    I'm on to you two.

    http://maninthemoon.today.com/files/2008/12/glaring-eyes.jpg

    Hahah, it would seem so. ;)


  • #197
    InTheTrees
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,900 ✭✭✭InTheTrees


    Bonito wrote: »
    Am I missing something here? :confused:

    Yes, Its a TRAP!!!

    :eek:


  • #198
    Bolag_the_2nd
    Registered Users Posts: 1,224 ✭✭✭Bolag_the_2nd


    Bonito wrote: »
    You get a thank for that :D

    How awesome am I. Bet you all hate me now. :pac:

    yes, for my spilt tea yesterday and the image of a sweaty 15 year old, shouting GLASSES like some naked tourettes dude, jeez Bonito,


  • #199
    Mars Bar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 31,949 ✭✭✭✭Mars Bar


    Bonito wrote: »
    You get a thank for that :D

    How awesome am I. Bet you all hate me now. :pac:

    Yes we do.

    First time I tried it was in my college accommodation and it was blocked under the category of "pornography".
    I'm home now and decided to google it again. :eek: <= That was my face.

    Mars Bar will take head of proxy warnings when it's you that's linking anything again!


  • #200
    CianRyan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,721 ✭✭✭✭CianRyan


    Bonito wrote: »
    Am I missing something here? :confused:

    She belongs to me. :)




    In real life.


  • #201
    Bonito
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,399 ✭✭✭Bonito


    Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »
    yes, for my spilt tea yesterday and the image of a sweaty 15 year old, shouting GLASSES like some naked tourettes dude, jeez Bonito,
    Why are you imagining me naked at 15. I'm much hawter now :pac:


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