Why are you single?

G-Money

RacoonQueen wrote: »

Even in pubs and clubs, when they approach you it's so much more natural than here. Irish men tend to stumble up, looking terrified before uttering some crappy ice breaker. Us Irish wimmen must be right bitches if we scare them that much.

I think you should go out some night and try to chat up straight women. Seeing you are a woman also, I suspect you'd get the same treatment as a normal guy would

BraziliaNZ

RacoonQueen wrote: »

Even in pubs and clubs, when they approach you it's so much more natural than here. Irish men tend to stumble up, looking terrified before uttering some crappy ice breaker. Us Irish wimmen must be right bitches if we scare them that much.

centuries of church oppression, over dependency on alcohol, living with our mother's till we're 45, etc, this has all taken it's toll on the Irish Male Persona over the years, give us a break ffs

bronte

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

we're well able to do it it's just the reaction we assume we would get, i.e. "he's a bleedin' weirdo", or, police sirens.

Yeah, but there's a damn good chance you wouldn't!
Maybe it's confidence?
I got so good at doing the asking when I lived in Ireland, it's like second nature to me now ( I have no patience and couldn't be arsed waiting around :pac: )
Over here tis like being on holiday.
They really don't hang about!

BraziliaNZ

bronte wrote: »

Yeah, but there's a damn good chance you wouldn't!
Maybe it's confidence?
I got so good at doing the asking when I lived in Ireland, it's like second nature to me now ( I have no patience and couldn't be arsed waiting around :pac: )
Over here tis like being on holiday.
They really don't hang about!

maybe you just come across as gamey?

4zn76tysfajdxp

bronte wrote: »

Over here tis like being on holiday.
They really don't hang about!

Where do you go on holiday?

Snowie

grandmaster wrote: »

For me it's not so much the rejection that I'm worried about, I kind of fully expect to get rejected if it's someone I really fancy. It's the manner in how they do it which is the worrying thing. I think most girls are polite enough but some can be very rude, or worse, when a guy even just says hello.

I think it's fair to say that if a girl made a move on a guy, 99.9% of the time even if he's not interested, he won't be a nasty about it. I think that percentage drops dramatically when the roles are reversed to be honest.

Dude im bye no ways a m,an to speek to women about im ****. unless shes english then suddenly ive got a porcelen tounge and get away with things that irish women would box my ears in for saying...

Take a bmx rider like the video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKy3FKCLEho

betta ya he, gets back up and goes and does the same thing again and nails it.... why because he knows if he doesnt the fear will get worse....

But the thing is he can go over watch what he just did on a camera see where he went wrong, and then corrected it. Theres no body there to tell him where hes gone wrong, hes got to figure it out for him self...

Exxpecting to get rejected tho your almost your own worst enemy for that, its like allready making up her mind.. with out saying anything... well i think so...assume nothing

tink2

RacoonQueen wrote: »

Irish dating culture is basically, get luck and meet and hit it off with someone when you're out and have a few drinks on you or happen to be out at the same time as someone you like/have the same friends as them - you both have drink on you and thus you both summon up the confidence to hook up. In general, people just don't 'date' here.



Yeah, thats the thing isn't it? It's not what we do, in the states they ask people out in the supermarket, in cafes, in the street. Here, we just get locked and hope to get lucky.

Jaysus getting locked is great isn't it?!! LOL!

bronte

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

maybe you just come across as gamey?

I can assure you Sir, I do not.

Mario Full Coroner wrote: »

Where do you go on holiday?

Will be in Rome in a few months Mr. Adarf.

Snowie

Fago! wrote: »

Thanx. I just basically started thinking liike... "If I'm not in I can't win"

exactly like folding on a game of texas holdem before youve ssen the flop

quicklickpaddy

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

exactly like folding on a game of texas holdem before youve ssen the flop

some people are dealt a 7, 2 tho :rolleyes:

Red Hand

quicklickpaddy wrote: »

some people are dealt a 7, 2 tho :rolleyes:

And some people don't even know how to play.:eek:

4zn76tysfajdxp

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

exactly like folding on a game of texas holdem before youve ssen the flop

"Flop" probably isn't the best word to use in this context.

Snowie

quicklickpaddy wrote: »

some people are dealt a 7, 2 tho :rolleyes:

yep and some times 2, 7s fall just afterwords

happened to me on friady one 50 quid

RacoonQueen

grandmaster wrote: »

I think you should go out some night and try to chat up straight women. Seeing you are a woman also, I suspect you'd get the same treatment as a normal guy would

Why don't I just go out with you instead?

tink2 wrote: »

Jaysus getting locked is great isn't it?!! LOL!

I wouldn't know, I don't drink that alcohol stuff.

Fago!

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

exactly like folding on a game of texas holdem before youve ssen the flop

I don't play tennis!

4zn76tysfajdxp

bronte wrote: »

Will be in Rome in a few months

Oh. You know what you're gonna have to do when you're there...

Mr. Adarf.

Huh?

paky

Im single because of my social status

G-Money

RacoonQueen wrote: »

Why don't I just go out with you instead?

heehee, incoming PM :pac:

bronte

Mario Full Coroner wrote: »

Oh. You know what you're gonna have to do when you're there...

Egg the pope?

Mario Full Coroner wrote: »

Huh?

Ah come on!

Mr. Adarf wrote: »

I'm new here and as a new member, I must say that this whole debacle is highly innappropriate. I'm new, by the way.





New.

I rofld! :pac:

tempura

grandmaster wrote: »

Why don't you do the sking then? There's no law against it you know

Oh, i have done the asking many a time only to be told later that it somehow destroys the mans masculinity.

The last bloke i asked out ( who duly accepted btw ) repeatedly told me that he had every intention of asking me out but i just beat him to it, this in effect left me as the decision maker for all of our future outings, a role i just did'nt want. I think had i waited for him to ask me out, theres every possibility that id still be waiting.

Oh, and just to add the time span between first clapping eyes on this person and the asking out was about 3 months, so he had plenty of time to make the first move.

bronte

tempura wrote: »

Oh, i have done the asking many a time only to be told later that it somehow destroys the mans masculinity.

The last bloke i asked out ( who duly accepted btw ) repeatedly told me that he had every intention of asking me out but i just beat him to it, this in effect left me as the decision maker for all of our future outings, a role i just did'nt want. I think had i waited for him to ask me out, theres every possibility that id still be waiting.

Oh, and just to add the time span between first clapping eyes on this person and the asking out was about 3 months, so he had plenty of time to make the first move.

See this is the other problem.
They hate doing the asking, so you do it.
Problem is they love the thrill of the chase, which kinda disappears after you've asked them out.
Basically you can't win!

RacoonQueen

grandmaster wrote: »

heehee, incoming PM :pac:

*taps foot*

migozarad

Remember the tv prog "Game ON",there was a character called Matthew (Malone),who had a social anxiety disorder,which meant he never ventured outside his flat.That,basically,is me,without the swarthy good looks (of Ben Chaplin,I'm more of a pasty Rory Delap clone)

Duggy747

Relationships are a pain in the ass!

It's all like a goddamn game of Snakes & Ladders, one wrong move (Directly or indirectly) and you're back where you started......except you generally feel alot shìttier than the said, enjoyable board game.

Women seem to love screwing around with me (Not in the way that benefits me, anyways :pac:) and every one seems to be the polar opposite of the last one, wrecks my fùckin' head when trying to balance out the current one! It's all like it's turning out to be individual case studys where I'll have to invest in a filing cabinet full of archives when venturing into the next "relationship" - "Right, do more of this..................less of that.............ignore this................"

Was with a girl recently for a few months where I didn't want to get too involved too quickly because I hate investing too much into relationships (I'm fragile like a flower :P).

Recently I got a text off her saying "I don't think this is working...we don't see each other enough...can we still be friends?" :mad: and *BAM* that was litteraly the last I heard from her. Fùck her if I'm going tailing after her like whipped cream as, from previous experience, she'll more than likely end up texting me down the line wanting to rekindle la la la.

Rekindle this, buddy! *grabs balls*

I just came to the conclusion that I generally enjoy myself more when single at this point in life , don't have to put up with so much horse-shìt when I got more important things to take care of!

Bah..............wimmen..............*cracks open beer can*............cùnts! :pac:

tempura

Duggy747 wrote: »

Relationships are a pain in the ass!

It's all like a goddamn game of Snakes & Ladders, one wrong move (Directly or indirectly) and you're back where you started......except you generally feel alot shìttier than the said, enjoyable board game.

Women seem to love screwing around with me (Not in the way that benefits me, anyways :pac:) and every one seems to be the polar opposite of the last one, wrecks my fùckin' head when trying to balance out the current one! It's all like it's turning out to be individual case studys where I'll have to invest in a filing cabinet full of archives when venturing into the next "relationship" - "Right, do more of this..................less of that.............ignore this................"

Was with a girl recently for a few months where I didn't want to get too involved too quickly because I hate investing too much into relationships (I'm fragile like a flower :P).

Recently I got a text off her saying "I don't think this is working...we don't see each other enough...can we still be friends?" :mad: and *BAM* that was the last I heard from her. Fùck her if I'm going tailing after her like whipped cream as, from previous experience, she'll end up texting me down the line wanting to rekindle la la la.

Rekindle this, buddy! *grabs balls*

I just came to the conclusion that I generally enjoy myself more when single at this point in life , don't have to put up with so much horse-shìt when I got more important things to take care of!

Bah..............wimmen..............*cracks open beer can*............cùnts! :pac:

OH, your a right ole charmer, wanna go for a drink ?

Duggy747

tempura wrote: »

OH, your a right ole charmer, wanna go for a drink ?

I'm just afraid you'll flee when you see what's under this hard, bitter shell :P

4zn76tysfajdxp

bronte wrote: »

Egg the pope?

Is that what the Romans do?

Ah come on!


I rofld! :pac:

I don't know what you're talking about...

jonnygiles

RacoonQueen wrote: »

See that's more like it. For the record, he was English, English guys are waaaay more forward than Irish guys.

For the record I find english girls are more approachable than Irish girls-was over in Newcastle for a weekend last year, gud times was had:D!

Single for about a month now, havent exactly had the greatest gf's in the world so I reckon ill give up looking for a relationship for a long while. Too much hassle it seems

bronte

Mario Full Coroner wrote: »

Is that what the Romans do?

When I'm there they do!

Mario Full Coroner wrote: »

I don't know what you're talking about...

Must have you confused with that other Mr. Adarf.
How embarrasing

nowimtalking

Don't know what I want out of a relationship, but I have loads of time!
People aren't flexible enough for me!

Have been in some messes of relationships which would put me off but they're over!! :D

Giselle

I'm single, which I don't mind, but I'd like a relationship. Its just meeting someone thats the problem.

I don't drink and being approached in pubs is really awkward if the guy is drunk, and clubs are much the same (or more so).

And I'm shy and quiet which works against me in two ways. I don't approach guys myself, and when they approach me, I think they think I'm aloof, but I'm not. I just need to know someone for more than a few minutes before I'm comfortable chatting.

McChubbin

They keep escaping.

jonnygiles

Giselle wrote: »

I'm single, which I don't mind, but I'd like a relationship. Its just meeting someone thats the problem.

I don't drink and being approached in pubs is really awkward if the guy is drunk, and clubs are much the same (or more so).

And I'm shy and quiet which works against me in two ways. I don't approach guys myself, and when they approach me, I think they think I'm aloof, but I'm not. I just need to know someone for more than a few minutes before I'm comfortable chatting.

Shy and quiet?Just my type o yesh!"how u doin?"

Giselle

jonnygiles wrote: »

Breathing?Just my type o yesh!"how u doin?"

FYP :pac:

jonnygiles

Giselle wrote: »

FYP :pac:

How did my original wording change to breathing?Ah guess i like my women breathing anyway:rolleyes:

Hooked

Jaysus, I don't know...

Between the many threads in the Ladies Lounge, Personal Issues and Relationship Issues I'm certain of one thing. Uncertainty.

Why are so many women (and men) happy to put up with a significant other who (in this weeks threads), doesn't lift a finger in the household, can't figure where to put his finger between the sheets and would rather use his/her fingers in an online forum with strangers than actually communicate with their partner.

Why am I sitting here ranting on keyboard, single (would mind dating/not really trying), 31 years of age, with own house, car, hair and teeth... great job, healthy eating, road running, funny, confident, creative, artistic, did I mention great cook? With a face not resembling a blind cobblers thumb. When the majority of the lads and lassies on here put up with day after day of lying, cheating, lazy excuses of boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancées, husbands and wives?

The answer I'm afraid escapes me. We're all very different people and I guess due to a mix of our upbringing, past relationships, attitudes and emotions -*want different things from life - and there's a plethora of reasons why we choose to put up with the pages and pages of topics covered daily in TLL, PI OR RI. And unfortunately no 'single' quick fix or formula that will bring that special someone into our lives.

What I will say is this... Once you find yourself single in your late twenties, having been in a few short termers and one long term relationship for most of your 20's, a few things become apparent.

1. The school days, college years and part time jobs are in the past - as are the countless opportunities to meet someone new.

2. Chances are you're settled in a full time job that survived the recession and work is full of, unfortunately, unavailable men/women.

3. If the threads on boards are anything to go by... 'some' women don't like to be chatted up in public, or do the asking themselves, and are guarded in a pub/club scene as they're sick of pissed up lads with a pint o'confidence approaching them to get the leg over.

So where do I bring my fishing pole now (no pun intended)? Online dating? Sorry, I just can't be arsed sifting through the rough to find a diamond. Join a club/society? Perhaps...

But the pond is definitely looking more like a puddle. If you're still single at 30+, you've got less fish and even lesser bait and the ones you do infrequently see jumping have been thrown back before and aren't keen to bite again. Strange that, fishing analogy, Hooked username, and never been fishing? Oops.. off on a tangent...

Leaving me, like so many other 'decent guys' - and gals! - with the I enjoy being single, wouldn't mind dating someone, but not really trying very hard attitude...

MIN2511

Hooked wrote: »

Jaysus, I don't know...

Leaving me, like so many other 'decent guys' - and gals! - with the I enjoy being single, wouldn't mind dating someone, but not really trying very hard attitude...

Wow... That was Long!

Kasabian

Giselle wrote: »

I'm single, which I don't mind, but I'd like a relationship. Its just meeting someone thats the problem.

I don't drink and being approached in pubs is really awkward if the guy is drunk, and clubs are much the same (or more so).

And I'm shy and quiet which works against me in two ways. I don't approach guys myself, and when they approach me, I think they think I'm aloof, but I'm not. I just need to know someone for more than a few minutes before I'm comfortable chatting.

Hooked wrote: »

Jaysus, I don't know...

Between the many threads in the Ladies Lounge, Personal Issues and Relationship Issues I'm certain of one thing. Uncertainty.

Why are so many women (and men) happy to put up with a significant other who (in this weeks threads), doesn't lift a finger in the household, can't figure where to put his finger between the sheets and would rather use his/her fingers in an online forum with strangers than actually communicate with their partner.

Why am I sitting here ranting on keyboard, single (would mind dating/not really trying), 31 years of age, with own house, car, hair and teeth... great job, healthy eating, road running, funny, confident, creative, artistic, did I mention great cook? With a face not resembling a blind cobblers thumb. When the majority of the lads and lassies on here put up with day after day of lying, cheating, lazy excuses of boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancées, husbands and wives?

The answer I'm afraid escapes me. We're all very different people and I guess due to a mix of our upbringing, past relationships, attitudes and emotions -*want different things from life - and there's a plethora of reasons why we choose to put up with the pages and pages of topics covered daily in TLL, PI OR RI. And unfortunately no 'single' quick fix or formula that will bring that special someone into our lives.

What I will say is this... Once you find yourself single in your late twenties, having been in a few short termers and one long term relationship for most of your 20's, a few things become apparent.

1. The school days, college years and part time jobs are in the past - as are the countless opportunities to meet someone new.

2. Chances are you're settled in a full time job that survived the recession and work is full of, unfortunately, unavailable men/women.

3. If the threads on boards are anything to go by... 'some' women don't like to be chatted up in public, or do the asking themselves, and are guarded in a pub/club scene as they're sick of pissed up lads with a pint o'confidence approaching them to get the leg over.

So where do I bring my fishing pole now (no pun intended)? Online dating? Sorry, I just can't be arsed sifting through the rough to find a diamond. Join a club/society? Perhaps...

But the pond is definitely looking more like a puddle. If you're still single at 30+, you've got less fish and even lesser bait and the ones you do infrequently see jumping have been thrown back before and aren't keen to bite again. Strange that, fishing analogy, Hooked username, and never been fishing? Oops.. off on a tangent...

Leaving me, like so many other 'decent guys' - and gals! - with the I enjoy being single, wouldn't mind dating someone, but not really trying very hard attitude...

Hooked have you met Giselle , Giselle this is Hooked:)

Let the magic begin :pac:

BraziliaNZ

Hooked wrote: »

Jaysus, I don't know...

It's not all doom and gloom. They're still out there, but they're probably just as cynical as you are nowadays too.

Tigger

I think you need to talk less listen more
also you sound a little bitter and a little frustrated

if you wanna meet women then dating svs are more honest than pretending interests you don t have

]

Hooked wrote: »

Jaysus, I don't know...

Between the many threads in the Ladies Lounge, Personal Issues and Relationship Issues I'm certain of one thing. Uncertainty.

Why are so many women (and men) happy to put up with a significant other who (in this weeks threads), doesn't lift a finger in the household, can't figure where to put his finger between the sheets and would rather use his/her fingers in an online forum with strangers than actually communicate with their partner.

Why am I sitting here ranting on keyboard, single (would mind dating/not really trying), 31 years of age, with own house, car, hair and teeth... great job, healthy eating, road running, funny, confident, creative, artistic, did I mention great cook? With a face not resembling a blind cobblers thumb. When the majority of the lads and lassies on here put up with day after day of lying, cheating, lazy excuses of boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancées, husbands and wives?

The answer I'm afraid escapes me. We're all very different people and I guess due to a mix of our upbringing, past relationships, attitudes and emotions -*want different things from life - and there's a plethora of reasons why we choose to put up with the pages and pages of topics covered daily in TLL, PI OR RI. And unfortunately no 'single' quick fix or formula that will bring that special someone into our lives.

What I will say is this... Once you find yourself single in your late twenties, having been in a few short termers and one long term relationship for most of your 20's, a few things become apparent.

1. The school days, college years and part time jobs are in the past - as are the countless opportunities to meet someone new.

2. Chances are you're settled in a full time job that survived the recession and work is full of, unfortunately, unavailable men/women.

3. If the threads on boards are anything to go by... 'some' women don't like to be chatted up in public, or do the asking themselves, and are guarded in a pub/club scene as they're sick of pissed up lads with a pint o'confidence approaching them to get the leg over.

So where do I bring my fishing pole now (no pun intended)? Online dating? Sorry, I just can't be arsed sifting through the rough to find a diamond. Join a club/society? Perhaps...

But the pond is definitely looking more like a puddle. If you're still single at 30+, you've got less fish and even lesser bait and the ones you do infrequently see jumping have been thrown back before and aren't keen to bite again. Strange that, fishing analogy, Hooked username, and never been fishing? Oops.. off on a tangent...

Leaving me, like so many other 'decent guys' - and gals! - with the I enjoy being single, wouldn't mind dating someone, but not really trying very hard attitude...

smurgen

don't know how i'm in a relationship with such a nice good looking girl.i can honestly say i'm the most anoying person i know!

Panthro

im single because ive decided to let the ladies come chasing me for a change....


yup....any minute now...

Tigger

she get your password again smurgen?

Giselle

lonad wrote: »

Hooked have you met Giselle , Giselle this is Hooked:)

Let the magic begin :pac:

/Stares at shoes.

/Blushes.

/Runs away.

mojesius

papagormo wrote: »

im single because ive decided to let the ladies come chasing me for a change....


yup....any minute now...

You may be waiting a long time. A lot of ladies I know including myself would never do the chasing. I wish I could but agggghhhhhhh! Rejection! Plus there's that myth/truth that blokes don't like women doing the chasing. Any truth in that?

bronte

mojesius wrote: »

You may be waiting a long time. A lot of ladies I know including myself would never do the chasing. I wish I could but agggghhhhhhh! Rejection! Plus there's that myth/truth that blokes don't like women doing the chasing. Any truth in that?

Apparently it makes you appear "Gamey"

GLaDOS

mojesius wrote: »

You may be waiting a long time. A lot of ladies I know including myself would never do the chasing. I wish I could but agggghhhhhhh! Rejection! Plus there's that myth/truth that blokes don't like women doing the chasing. Any truth in that?

It's both, depends on the guy, like all those things

Duggy747

mojesius wrote: »

You may be waiting a long time. A lot of ladies I know including myself would never do the chasing. I wish I could but agggghhhhhhh! Rejection! Plus there's that myth/truth that blokes don't like women doing the chasing. Any truth in that?

Nah, well I love it anyways. Last girl I was with came up to me out of the blue in the nite-club and gave me the oddest chat-up line:

"Where you at the Metallica concert?"

I also realise how dick-ish my last post was too, I'm useless expressing myself on boards :pac: A pinch of salt too far, me-thinks.

Panthro

mojesius wrote: »

You may be waiting a long time. A lot of ladies I know including myself would never do the chasing. I wish I could but agggghhhhhhh! Rejection! Plus there's that myth/truth that blokes don't like women doing the chasing. Any truth in that?

i have no idea to be honest, based soley on my expericence, the one girl that actually approached me after about an hour of eye contact was an american girl!
she jsut came up and said hello and we got chatting.
personally i was well impressed, its not the easiest thing to just go up to a stranger and make conversation, no matter the gender u are!

mojesius

Duggy747 wrote: »

Nah, well I love it anyways. Last girl I was with came up to me out of the blue in the nite-club and gave me the oddest chat-up line:

"Where you at the Metallica concert?"

I also realise how dick-ish my last post was too, I'm useless expressing myself on boards :pac: A pinch of salt too far, me-thinks.

Not dick-ish at all. There are far more dick-ish worthy posts here. And I'm with you on the filing cabinet idea.