The Bill, Dunphy & Giles Great Quotes Thread.

starbelgrade

You either love them or love to hate them, but either way, you certainly can't deny that they come up with some right crackers, so here's the place to post them....

Kicking off with -

About the Fergie V Strachen feud.

Eamon: "Scots - they're either nice or they're horrid and these two are horrid."
Bill: "The Scots wont like that Eamon, thats bordering on racism".
Eamon: "Its not racism its ethnic criticism, Bill".

Sir Gallagher

Any sentance followed by "baby".

monkey9

Bill: Can i just interrupt and say somethi.............

Panel: NO, BILL!

Spiritoftheseventies

starbelgrade wrote: »

You either love them or love to hate them, but either way, you certainly can't deny that they come up with some right crackers, so here's the place to post them....

Kicking off with -

About the Fergie V Strachen feud.

Eamon: "Scots - they're either nice or they're horrid and these two are horrid."
Bill: "The Scots wont like that Eamon, thats bordering on racism".
Eamon: "Its not racism its ethnic criticism, Bill".

Bambi on ice from Giles tonight was a good one. But do think they play up a bit tonight. Were slightly over the top tonight.

starbelgrade

On the subject of Ronaldinho

Eamon: "He had two great seasons, Bill, he was world footballer of the year and he won the Champions League for Barcelona. And then he went to the party."

Gilesy: "He's still at the party, Bill"

Bill: "It must have been one of Eamon's Parties!"

kippy

Spiritoftheseventies wrote: »

Bambi on ice from Giles tonight was a good one. But do think they play up a bit tonight. Were slightly over the top tonight.

They (dunphy in particular) were pissed that United didnt make it to the semis.
We've seen ****e games at this stage before with PL games involved, they just didnt appear as ****e because we had some tenuous link to the games.

They are decent to watch purely for the comedy value, but tonight, like a lot of nights was more about talking about how didnt United manage to get there.

Spiritoftheseventies

kippy wrote: »

They (dunphy in particular) were pissed that United didnt make it to the semis.
We've seen ****e games at this stage before with PL games involved, they just didnt appear as ****e because we had some tenuous link to the games.

They are decent to watch purely for the comedy value, but tonight, like a lot of nights was more about talking about how didnt United manage to get there.

Yes Giles was acting up tonight. You expect him to play it straight but some strange lines coming from him. Wish Brady was back.

Ush1

kippy wrote: »

They (dunphy in particular) were pissed that United didnt make it to the semis.
We've seen ****e games at this stage before with PL games involved, they just didnt appear as ****e because we had some tenuous link to the games.

They are decent to watch purely for the comedy value, but tonight, like a lot of nights was more about talking about how didnt United manage to get there.

Excellent point.

starbelgrade

It's a quotes thread lads, not a discussion on the relative merits of the panel!

Eamon: "Look at Graeme, he won four Champions Leagues."

Graeme Souness: " Three."

Eamon: " He won four league titles."

Souness: "Five."

Dunphy: "It's not bloody Mastermind."

bamboozling

On Michael Carrick - " Carrick was signed for Spurs a few years back for 3m. That's the level he is at. He is a nothing player. He is one-paced. He doesn't have the personality to always get on the ball like a United player should. "

On Rio Ferdinand - " Ferdinand is a clown. He was a liability for the first goal and he is always a liability. It was Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink against Rio Ferdinand of Barclays Bank. "

On Fabio Cannavarro - "If Rio Ferdinand is worth 100,000 a week, then this guy is worth EUR100 million . . . . . a day"

On the Midfield - " United have nothing in midfield - they are a shambles.

On Samuel Eto'o - " He is a good finisher other than that he is pretty ordinary

On Barcelona - "After watching Watford against Manchester City last night that was like a bubblebath. It was beautiful."

On Roy Keane - "He's a gentleman. He's a class act. He's a rebel. And he stands up to bullies."

On Roy Keane - "He's right, he's right about everything!"

On Niall Quinn - "I'm not gonna address the Niall Quinn agenda,I think Niall Quinn is a creep" On Niall Quinn - "The man's an idiot, a Mother Theresa"

On Gary Doherty- "Doherty's head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg."

On Liam Brady and the vacant Irish Job - "It would have to be a young, hungry fighter. that rules out everybody here."

On Harry Kewell - "Kewell should have been yanked off the pitch at half time and put in a hot bath, a boiling hot bath."

On Ireland in the 2002 World Cup - "I will be supporting Germany and Saudi Arabia in the contests ahead."

On Garth Crooks and Sven Goran Eriksson - "ha, ha, ha, that's the first time you'll see sex between 2 men live on the bbc"

On Liverpool v Barca - "I was hoping in the last fifteen minutes that Barcelona would beat them. I've made my mind up on Benitez tonight. He's a nice man but he's got a huge negative streak running through him. Liverpool were terrible in the second half. They didn't play football. If that was a concert, you'd boo. Gerrard: found out. A nothing player. They were terrible. Terrible.

On Liverpool v Arsenal - "You've jumped over the fence there baby!" while talking to Liam brady on being biased towards Arsenal and not being impartial as an analyst.

On Journalist Rod Liddle after Liddle had written a particularly scathing article [2] criticising Roy Keane- "That's the fella who ran off and left his wife for a young one!" Dunphy later apologised to Liddle for making this comment.

fillmore jive

Dunphy: 'Sergio Ramos is a headbanger, he's like Paul Mcshane on steroids!'

Spiritoftheseventies

All here in one clip

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iBDlJEabiI

kippy

starbelgrade wrote: »

It's a quotes thread lads, not a discussion on the relative merits of the panel!

http://www.dangerhere.com/hallofguff/eamonn_dunphy.php

From here:
http://www.talkceltic.net/forum/talkceltic-pub/62910-eamon-dunphy-quotes-man-who-knows-nothing.html

On Luis Garcia:
"They (Liverpool) should put Garcia where he belongs - in the dustbin."

On Djibril Cisse:
"here we have Cisse, right wing, attempts to put in a cross, BANG...hits the full back, again BANG hits the full back, BANG...off the full back again, and once more, BANG...smacks the full back again.... Millions of euro and he can't clear the first man, I mean...what's he trying to do to the full back here, Kill him??"

On Harry Kewell:
"Kewell should have been yanked off the pitch at half
time and put in a hot bath, a boiling hot bath."
"Fat and a clown. A fat clown for all to see."

On Rio Ferdinand:
"Ferdinand is a clown. He was a liability for the
first goal and he is always a liability. It was Jan Vennegoor of
Hesselink against Rio Ferdinand of Barclays Bank."
"a tramp"

On Fabio Cannavarro:
"If Rio Ferdinand is worth £100,000 a week, then
this guy is worth €100 million . . . . . a day"

On Liam Brady (After Ireland lost a two goal lead against Holland in 1983):
"He is often looked on as a great player. He is nothing of the kind. His performance on Wednesday was a disgrace, a monument to conceit adorned with vanity and self-indulgence, rendered all the more objectional by the swagger of his gait. He was deemed by many observers to have had a splendid game."

On Niall Quinn:
"I'm not gonna address the Niall Quinn agenda, Niall
Quinn is a creep"
"The man's an idiot, a Mother Theresa"

On Barcelona:
"After watching Watford against Manchester City last night
that was like a bubblebath. It was beautiful."

On Garth Crooks and Sven Goran Eriksson:
"ha, ha, ha, that's the first time you'll see sex between 2 men live on the BBC"

During the coverage of Euro 2004:
"You need dictatorships and poverty to produce great footballers."

On Christiano Ronaldo:
the way Ronaldo "clicks his heels", is the "most wicked thing in the game." "a simple cheat" "Poof ball"

On Mick McCarthy:
"He's one of the biggest whingers in world football... he's a bloody eejit."

On Kevin Kilbane:
"Kilbane's head is better than his feet. If only he had three heads, one on the end of each leg."

On John Giles:
"Usually it takes a bottle of Bacardi and a gallon of Coke to get John out of his seat."

On Michael Carrick:
"Carrick was signed for Spurs a few years back for £3m. That's the level he is at. He is a nothing player. He is one-paced. He doesn't have the personality to always get on the ball like a United player should. "

Before the Liverpool .v. Real Betis game at Anfield when Roy Keane announced his retirement from football Bill O'Herlihy stated that in the column about Roy a journalist called him a thug. Dunphy continued roaring at Bill asking him who's column it was. Bill replied it was on the back page of the Sunday Times. "Look at it" he told Eamon. Eamon still pestered him asking who wrote it. Bill replied "I can't remember his name". Eamon continued saying:
"I'll tell you who wrote it, Rod Liddle, he's the guy who ran away and left his wife for a young one".

On about the Fergie V Strachen feud:
Eamon: "Scots they're either nice or they're horrid and these two are horrid.
Bill: "The Scots wont like that Eamon, thats bordering on racism".
Eamon: "Its not racism its ethnic criticism Bill".

On the stubborn climate which exists in the board room at Real Madrid:

"Bill, Bill... those directors over there are on another planet. They're on mushrooms or something...THEY'RE ON ACID BILL!!!"

On John Hartson:

'Bill, Hartson is not a 7million pound player....its a disgrace, a shambles! This is the state of football today Bill. I have a clip here of why Hartson is NOT a £7million player....Roll it there Bill! (literally 1 second in to the clip) OKAY, HOLD IT THERE BILL!!! (draws a circle around Hartson's arse) Bill, that is NOT the arse of a £7million player!''




http://www.okeydokefootball.com/showArticle.asp?ArticleID=2


and of course the best place for quotes:
www.google.ie



Happy now? Quotes have been done before all over the place but sure lets have another one.
Quotes dont really add to discussion in my opinion but I suppose no harm in having a thread on them.

starbelgrade

Eamo can't count

"Eamon Dunphy is a nobody with one virtue; honesty and realism."

SlickRic

kippy wrote: »

On John Hartson:

'Bill, Hartson is not a 7million pound player....its a disgrace, a shambles! This is the state of football today Bill. I have a clip here of why Hartson is NOT a £7million player....Roll it there Bill! (literally 1 second in to the clip) OKAY, HOLD IT THERE BILL!!! (draws a circle around Hartson's arse) Bill, that is NOT the arse of a £7million player!''

i didn't stop laughing for a good 30 seconds.

epic.

starbelgrade

kippy wrote: »

Happy now? Quotes have been done before all over the place but sure lets have another one.

Well, forgive me for even bothering my hole. However, the tip on how to find quotes via the internet is much appreciated. I must go and try out that Google thing you speak of.

kippy

starbelgrade wrote: »

Well, forgive me for even bothering my hole. However, the tip on how to find quotes via the internet is much appreciated. I must go and try out that Google thing you speak of.

Glad to be of service......;)
Seriously, sorry to have dragged the post off topic slightly, and sorry again for being a bit narky about the topic. To be honest, the show is pure comedy, I reckon the lads would be just as funny analysing paint drying.

Spiritoftheseventies

kippy wrote: »

Glad to be of service......;)
Seriously, sorry to have dragged the post off topic slightly, and sorry again for being a bit narky about the topic. To be honest, the show is pure comedy, I reckon the lads would be just as funny analysing paint drying.

The show was comedy tonight. Most of the time would watch them over ITV anytime but tonight it was sloppy

missingtime

Eamonn Dunphy calls apres match "****ing stupid" live on Air. Ha ha ha ha

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_uNY2uw4_OA

never seen it!!

starbelgrade

kippy wrote: »

Seriously, sorry to have dragged the post off topic slightly, and sorry again for being a bit narky about the topic.

It's what's known in the business as "throwing an Eamo".

Bill: "So you think they (Arsenal) can score, even in Spain?"

Gilesy "Well I don't know what you mean by 'even in Spain', I mean the goals there are the same size and all that..."

Ush1

fillmore jive wrote: »

Dunphy: 'Sergio Ramos is a headbanger, he's like Paul Mcshane on steroids!'

That's just brilliant on so many levels!:pac:

newballsplease

Dunphy: 'Man Utd must be sitting at home pulling their hair out watching that'

Bill: ' Id say their slitting their wrists'

Dunphy: ' I wouldnt go that far Bill'

Pinturicchio

AQUARD?

newballsplease

maybe not then!

mike65

Its a good thread, not a great thread

murpho999

I love watching Giles & Dunphy, mightn't agree with everything they say but love watching them.

Lived abroad for a few years and WC & EC weren't the same without them.

Love all the quotes and vids here. Here's my two cents worth which I enjoyed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Fvsg_Ct1cw

starbelgrade

murpho999 wrote: »

I love watching Giles & Dunphy, mightn't agree with everything they say but love watching them.

They really don't like the Souness at all!

Eamon to Liam Brady. "Hold on, you've jumped the fence, baby!!"

Reganio 2

starbelgrade wrote: »

They really don't like the Souness at all!

Eamo had a love affair with Souness for a while when he started. He used to lick the you know what off him.

Jayob10

Dunphy on Uniteds next round game against Inter Milan

"Bill, United won't have it as easy in the next round, ya see Inter have this guy up front called Ivanisovic (meant Ibrahimovich) who can punish them".

Would have been classic if Bill cut to a clip of him serving a double fault at Wimbledon.

LuckyLloyd

Spiritoftheseventies wrote: »

All here in one clip

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iBDlJEabiI

Awesome ridiculousness! That said, he was spot on about Veneables, and nailed him to the cross in a way no other journalist seemed really willing to do at the time.

Mikeyt086

Shocked we havent this one in the thread:

Dunphy: "United are ordinary. Fletcher is an amateur player, Ronaldo is a puffball. They will be found out tonight by a well drilled Italian outfit."

Final score: United 7-1 Roma. Ronaldo and Fletcher performing particularily outstanding.

NabyLadistheman

I remember this one there a couple of season's back Giles & Dunphy were discussing the merits of Avram Grant as Chelsea interim manager.

Dunphy "At Leeds back in the 70's, now John will know more about this than me, Clough got the bullet after a month in charge & Jimmy Armfield came in & did a wonderful job. The late Jmmy Armfield. A marvelous manager, he galvanised the team & brought them to a European cup final"

Giles "Sorry there Eamon but Jimmy's still alive"

Dunphy "I told you John knew more about it than me"

Amidst guffaws of laughter:

Bill - Okey doke we'll go to a break!

am i bovvered

I posted this before.......from Giles, I've heard twice,
"tactics are irrelevant"
A great qoute from an ex international manager

Raytown Rocks

On last nights show.

Dunphy " You know I dont like to talk about my footballing career"
Giles " I wouldnt if I was you either Eamonn"

Superb

Kev_ps3

Cant wait for the world cup with Dunphy and co:D

Jayob10

torresistheman wrote: »

I remember this one there a couple of season's back Giles & Dunphy were discussing the merits of Avram Grant as Chelsea interim manager.

Dunphy "At Leeds back in the 70's, now John will know more about this than me, Clough got the bullet after a month in charge & Jimmy Armfield came in & did a wonderful job. The late Jmmy Armfield. A marvelous manager, he galvanised the team & brought them to a European cup final"

Giles "Sorry there Eamon but Jimmy's still alive"

Dunphy "I told you John knew more about it than me"

Amidst guffaws of laughter:

Bill - Okey doke we'll go to a break!

I remember that! Nobody passed comment on it at the time or after which was amazing considering it was one of Eamo's finer gaffes! Quality stuff the way he butted in and said "the late great Jimmy Armfield", thinking he was paying the man the greatest of respect.

We watched that at home and then subsequently christened our fantasy football league "The Jimmy Armfield Memorial Cup"

NabyLadistheman

Jayob10 wrote: »

I remember that! Nobody passed comment on it at the time or after which was amazing considering it was one of Eamo's finer gaffes! Quality stuff the way he butted in and said "the late great Jimmy Armfield", thinking he was paying the man the greatest of respect.

We watched that at home and then subsequently christened our fantasy football league "The Jimmy Armfield Memorial Cup"

Ya it was legend alright! It slipped through the net as there were other heroics in the studio the same night. Searched everywhere for a clip of it but not to be. Gold mine!

Paleface

Long may these guy stay in their job for pure entertainment value alone which at the end of the day is what makes great TV.

I have no interest in listening to analysis on any other station.

I think Apres Match hit the nail on the head with this sketch!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zaGcW4aU9bw

Green Giant

Dunphy on the Barcelona defence in 2007:

"van Bronkhorst is over the hill. Puyol and Marquez are ordinary. Oleguer is a disaster waiting to happen."

keane2097

Green Giant wrote: »

Dunphy on the Barcelona defence in 2007:

"van Bronkhorst is over the hill. Puyol and Marquez are ordinary. Oleguer is a disaster waiting to happen."

spot on imo

Warper

You have to admit they are great entertainment

Even last night Dunphy on Barcelona:

Dunphy: "You wont win anything with a defense like that"

Ronnie: "They won the CL last year with that defense"

Dunphy "Ok they won the CL last year"

Irishcrx

On C.Ronaldo - Dunphy - "Ronaldo is the clown in the circus that is Real madrid"

On Real Madrid Dunphy - "Toy boys Bill, They spend more time in the dressing room doing their make up and hair than worrying about tactics"

Irishcrx

Almost forgot one of the best ones. 99 final against Bayern Munich.

Dunphy before match - "Utd haven't a chance here , Munich will outclass them on expierience and class 2-0"

Dunphy after match - " I always knew deep down that Utd could pull this one out of the bag Bill"

NaiveMelodies

Does anyone think that the real thing has now surpassed Apres match in terms of hilarity?

starbelgrade

Bill: "It's been said that Fabregas isn't a natural leader, what's your opinion on that John?"

Giles: "Who said that Bill, that's rubbish?"

Bill: "It's been written in the media."

Giles: "By who?"

Bill: "By people."

starbelgrade

dreamers75

only1stevo wrote: »

Does anyone think that the real thing has now surpassed Apres match in terms of hilarity?

Talking tru your hoop only1stevooooooooo

Ush1

keane2097 wrote: »

spot on imo

Oh that defence that won the Champions League and La Liga? Same ol' cliche about the current defence that also won, hang on a sec, the CL and La Liga!

OPENROAD

starbelgrade wrote: »

ah the real clip from 1990 I Would love to see is the analysis after the Egypt match

monkey9

dreamers75 wrote: »

Talking tru your hoop only1stevooooooooo

Possibly so! Possibly so!