cheeckiest thing ya ever siad to a teacher

Smokin_Aces

ItsAWindUp wrote: »

I'd hazard a guess that this only encouraged him further.

No sir. I edited in my post what happened after it. But he was known for it though.

ItsAWindUp

Smokin_Aces wrote: »

No sir. I edited in my post what happened after it. But he was known for it though.

Has he ever been investigated for it? On the plus side, you didn't have to go to any w/anky (pardon the pun) school masses.

Junco Partner

speakin of cheek did anyone have a teacher who used to let you away with stuff that would land others outside the door

my english teacher had a soft spot for me i reckon i used to throw dirty jokes into most of our convos and shed laugh and then someone else would get kicked out for talking outof turn

Smokin_Aces

ItsAWindUp wrote: »

Has he ever been investigated for it? On the plus side, you didn't have to go to any w/anky (pardon the pun) school masses.

He was, Murphy case last year I think it was. Only going by what I heard.

ItsAWindUp

Smokin_Aces wrote: »

He was, Murphy case last year I think it was. Only going by what I heard.

Looks like you were in the right so!

flanno_7hi

Some of you don't know where the cheek/being a cnut line is though.
One of my favourites:
It wasn't me though..
Back in 2002 (jesus) We had this poshdub (hot as fook) young physics teacher. She was a bit of a yummy one anyway and into her taebow which she liked to tell us about. She also happened to be a mental bitch who although obviously very clever could not handle a class of 6 or 7 (pretty nerdy) lads.
One week she comes in with a black eye from Tae bow(????), anyway gets to about Thursday and as usual one of us is gettin a bollokin from this bitch when one of the lads turn around and pipes up with "no wonder he ****in hit her" Cue her face dropping and her running out of the room, us lads pissin ourselves laughing and a suspension for the (usually quiet) young lad. The look on her face was one of the funniest things I have ever seen.

One of my own, not very funny but memorable for me:
Religion class in LC (like you had **** all else to do??) our "cool" young "hippy" religion teacher is conducting a discussion on something divisive (probably abortion) any way everyone is chiming in (i was in a bit of a licky class). I was bored as **** but could see that the end of class bell was coming up.
Everyone was getting pretty animated and loud so I stick man hand up(trying to get some quiet and I hadnt said much in this debate)...
...Silence...

Hippy Teacher: Yes Flanno?
Me: Miss thats all well and good but If a dog is chasing his own tail and he catches it does he implode.
...Silence accept for my mate beside me sniggering...Bell goes i jump up and leave.

Out with the lads for a bit of standing round the corridor for breaktime. teacher comes up and stops me in the corridor and i got 20 questions about was everything ok at home and do I need to talk to anyone (FFS it was a joke)
I thought it was funny anyway

G_R

hmmm,

we had a french lady in our school who us pronunciation and stuff one day a week. The 6th years do a thing each year where we deliver valentines messages from students around the school to their valentine. Basically an excuse for a doss couple of classes.

Anyway, after we had delivered the messages and the roses, we had a few left over, and we could see the french teacher was walking over towards the building we were in. So i got one of the roses and stood in the middle of the hallway and waited for her.

Me: Bonjour madame!
Ms F: *suspicious* Bonjour Daniel, are you ok?
Me: Oui Madame *drop to one knee, holds out rose* Voulez-vous couchez avec moi, ce soir?
Ms F: Awh, *takes rose* tank you for zee rose, but No:eek:. *walks off*

I was crushed :mad:

m@cc@

DazMarz wrote: »

Principal: Can I have a quick word?
Me: Velocity

Cheeky cúnt.....:p

English wasn't your strong point then.

Blisterman

We were watching a video following a guy around with learning disabilities on his search to get a job. Afterwards...

Teacher: "The government runs a program to enable people with mental disablities to get jobs."
Me: "Is that how you got your job.?


Suspended, but it was worth it.

YouTalkinToMe

Teacher that had a drink problem and trust me you would know it looking at her anyway i came in to her maths class one friday morning after been out at a work party the night before (part-time supermarket).So i wasnt to feeling to well and was asked to answer a math q but couldnt so she says to me whats your problem and i said i had a hangover, so she glares at me and before she could say anything i asked her for a curer from her cabinet,so she screams at me to get out of her class which im doing and as im leaving she says stand outside the door and i said good luck im off for a pint and the whole class pissed themselves laughing.;)

MikeyCdublin

Redzer7 wrote: »

Saying batman to a mad fùcker of a teacher who eats chalk, brave man and suffered the consequences. Legend in my eyes anyways.

Is that teacher in a school in ballymun

SarahBeep!

Turned everything in my english teachers class room upside down!
Even the orientation of the screen on his laptop Arrived into his class later that day (first time he saw) to see his going apeshit! Ahahahahahahaha.
He ran around blaming EVERY other class in the school except us...legend.
Would have gotten in so much trouble only for the fact my physics teacher was head of discipline. He got me outta so much stuff over the years, one of the reasons I'm training to be a science teacher.

But English teacher had no time for me so I had no time for him. By rights, if I was a scumbag who got bad grades I prob would have been tossed out at some point.

Tilt Gone

We had a teacher called Miss O Reilly for Business. One day she asked me for my homework and when i gave her a bull**** excuse she said "Oh really". I couldn't help myself and jumped out of my seat and shouted at the top of my voice (while pointing at her) "No O' reilly" Cue the whole class bursting into the fits of laughter.

A very high standard of courtesy and respect are expected of students in their dealings with other students, teachers and members of the public. I had to write that line so many times it still sticks with me now and i'm 29

Cypher_sounds

I got into a bit of hot water in my french class one afternoon i was in 5th year, was accused of disrupting the class once too many, the teacher started writing out a report sheet for me, at the end of the class as i was walking out she handed me the report form for my wrong doings,

I said to her casually - ''I hope the ink is dry on this before i wipe my arse
with it'' and walked fairly swiftly out of the room, i had it up to my neck with that auld hag

But the funniest thing i ever heard was one friday evening think we were in 3rd year, we were just about finished for the week, and right as we were about pack our bags the teacher told us ''ok so do questions 1-10 on page 57'' we started groaning but in the midst of it all one of my mates said out loud 'AHH MAMMY' LMAO funniest thing every and was fairly frickin embarrassed about it the chap forgot himself completely, the whole class were in fits of laughter lol

m@cc@

It's amazing, the volume of hard bastards in this thread.

ROCKMAN

m@cc@ wrote: »

It's amazing, the volume of hard bastards in this thread.

Come back ere ,and say that ....

nkay1985

Not me but one of the other lads. We were in transition year and, as such, had a load of handy classes.

One was IT which was taught by a lad straight out of college. Another was some form of business taught by a girl straight out of college.

A few weeks into class, we were talking to the girl and she mentioned the college she went to. It was the same as the IT teacher so of course everyone was straight away asking did she know him back in college etc. She got real embarassed, real quick. Cue the lad in class, "Did he show you his three and a half inch floppy miss"?

owenc

nkay1985 wrote: »

Not me but one of the other lads. We were in transition year and, as such, had a load of handy classes.

One was IT which was taught by a lad straight out of college. Another was some form of business taught by a girl straight out of college.

A few weeks into class, we were talking to the girl and she mentioned the college she went to. It was the same as the IT teacher so of course everyone was straight away asking did she know him back in college etc. She got real embarassed, real quick. Cue the lad in class, "Did he show you his three and a half inch floppy miss"?

Schools down there seem to get away with everything, we wouldn't dare say that! We arn't even aloud to have our ties past 5 strips, or have our hair past our collar (not that i would, some emo freaks do) or we get suspended. But who cares because everyone calls us snobs!

Cormac2791

m@cc@ wrote: »

English wasn't your strong point then.

Velocity = speed

m@cc@

cormacharraghy wrote: »

Velocity = speed

Indeed, doesn't imply quick. Rather it's the rate of change of position.

blaze1

not quite a teacher but got the bully good.

in middle school there a was another pupil that used to give me a bit of stick.
anyways cant remember exactly what he did but he had to write 200 lines.

so i told him to write the first line and just put ditto marks under all the words as it just meant the same thing hahahahaahah

he then got 500 lines and left me alone after that.

questionmark?

blaze1 wrote: »

not quite a teacher but got the bully good.

in middle school there a was another pupil that used to give me a bit of stick.
anyways cant remember exactly what he did but he had to write 200 lines.

so i told him to write the first line and just put ditto marks under all the words as it just meant the same thing hahahahaahah

he then got 500 lines and left me alone after that.

As TT once said was he one of those kids that only went to school because thats where the bus stopped.

Gang of Gin

pablomakaveli wrote: »

When i was in first year our teacher was out sick and another techaer who happened to be our year head was supervising us for the class.

When our regular teacher was back the next day he asked "So how did you get on with the year head yesterday"

For some reason which ill never know i shouted out "She tried to rape us" as a joke. I immediatly regretted it. Anyway the teacher killed me and i was humiliating when i had to apologize to the year head.

That is hilarious!

ThelotusKid

Teacher: Do you think I'm some sort of an eejit, or something?

Me: Clint Eastwood stare - all I could hear was my heart pounding in my chest.

Sometimes, actions speak louder than words.

carefulnow100

Wow all I can say going by this thread every Irish teacher in the country is a b!atch:D.

Transition year we had this guy for loads of different classes, he could never get us to do anythin and in fairness we wernt bothered. So he walks passed me and my mate one day and i whispered that his face looked weird.

Out comes my mate with " yeah lad, he has some blówjob lips on him" teacher turns and gives us a stare that would kill a goat!

I nearly died, i was a good(ish) boy:rolleyes:.
Same teacher got hit in the head with a peice of chalk from 20ft one day, he was none to pleased I tells ya! pity the guy who threw it was standing right under a camera...linked directly to the principles office!

Donkey Oaty

ThelotusKid wrote: »

Teacher: Do you think I'm some sort of an eejit, or something?

Me: Clint Eastwood stare - all I could hear was my heart pounding in my chest.

Very good...you can hear the Ennio Morricone "Aah-eee-ahh-ee-ah!" in the background. Reminds me of a scene from Joyce's Dubliners:

Tell me," he added, glancing first for approval to the
lady beside him, "do you take me for a fool? Do you think me an
utter fool?"

The man glanced from the lady's face to the little egg-shaped head
and back again; and, almost before he was aware of it, his tongue
had found a felicitous moment:

"I don't think, sir," he said, "that that's a fair question to put to me."

There was a pause in the very breathing of the clerks. Everyone
was astounded (the author of the witticism no less than his
neighbours) and Miss Delacour, who was a stout amiable person,
began to smile broadly. Mr. Alleyne flushed to the hue of a wild
rose and his mouth twitched with a dwarf s passion. He shook his
fist in the man's face till it seemed to vibrate like the knob of some
electric machine:

"You impertinent ruffian! You impertinent ruffian! I'll make short
work of you! Wait till you see! You'll apologise to me for your
impertinence or you'll quit the office instanter! You'll quit this, I'm
telling you, or you'll apologise to me!"

owenc

carefulnow100 wrote: »

Wow all I can say going by this thread every Irish teacher in the country is a b!atch:D.

Transition year we had this guy for loads of different classes, he could never get us to do anythin and in fairness we wernt bothered. So he walks passed me and my mate one day and i whispered that his face looked weird.

Out comes my mate with " yeah lad, he has some blówjob lips on him" teacher turns and gives us a stare that would kill a goat!

I nearly died, i was a good(ish) boy:rolleyes:.
Same teacher got hit in the head with a peice of chalk from 20ft one day, he was none to pleased I tells ya! pity the guy who threw it was standing right under a camera...linked directly to the principles office!

Thank god i don't have it then, it would be horrible for me because it would be all this republican rubbish and they'd translate my name and everything.. ugh god i can just imagine it.

Donkey Oaty

owenc wrote: »

Thank god i don't have it then, it would be horrible for me because it would be all this republican rubbish and they'd translate my name and everything.. ugh god i can just imagine it.

Ciúnas, a Eoin!

owenc

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

Ciúnas, a Eoin!

What? You can't translate my surname!:P:P

Son Of A Vidic

Walked into my Leaving Cert Maths class late one morning, the teacher turned from the blackboard and said ''You late for class.'' my response was - ''obviously.'' The class erupted into laughter, I sat down and got away with it.

Daemos

Lone Stone wrote: »

When i was in secondery school my english teacher threw the role book at me for calling him a care bear :eek:

I nick named my geography teacher eye go from sligo and made her cry in the class and eh hmm what else ow i drew a nasty picture of jesus in that religious studys class one time and said some stuff when the teacher called me evil and i was kicked out of the class for ever :eek:

emm meny other things i wont go into.

Did anyone else read this post in the voice of Eric Cartman?

mink_man

i knew there was something funny about the thread title, only realised there that there's a "c" in it! ha

Mars Bar

mink_man wrote: »

i knew there was something funny about the thread title, only realised there that there's a "c" in it! ha

"said" or "siad" in this case, stood out to me first!

Savage Tyrant

mars bar wrote: »

"said" or "siad" in this case, stood out to me first!

And then the same mistake repeated in the first post!

Horse_box

We used to have a teacher ,Smokey Joe, who would always leave for a smoke break half way through the class(was before the smoking ban) He was renowned for it and very rarely wouldn't go out for one

Anyway, one day he went out of the class to photocopy something and left his smoke box on the table. One of the lads grabbed them and gave everybody in the class one to have in their hand for when he came back into the class.

After 5 mins he arrives back in only to see 12 or 13 lads with smokes hanging out of their mouths. He stood there in silence for a few seconds not knowing what hell was going on and me, the little cheeky fecker that I was, said ''Any chance of a light sir?'' with the fag wavering out the side of my gob

The class were hysterical and Smokey Joe, who was actually a fairly sound man, saw the funny side of it. That or he was sh1tting it that he would get in trouble for leaving smokes unattended in a classroom full of young lads

Those were the days

Savage Tyrant

Horse_box wrote: »

We used to have a teacher ,Smokey Joe, who would always leave for a smoke break half way through the class(was before the smoking ban) He was renowned for it and very rarely wouldn't go out for one

Anyway, one day he went out of the class to photocopy something and left his smoke box on the table. One of the lads grabbed them and gave everybody in the class one to have in their hand for when he came back into the class.

After 5 mins he arrives back in only to see 12 or 13 lads with smokes hanging out of their mouths. He stood there in silence for a few seconds not knowing what hell was going on and me, the little cheeky fecker that I was, said ''Any chance of a light sir?'' with the fag wavering out the side of my gob

The class were hysterical and Smokey Joe, who was actually a fairly sound man, saw the funny side of it. That or he was sh1tting it that he would get in trouble for leaving smokes unattended in a classroom full of young lads

Those were the days

We actually had a Chemistry teacher that let a few of us smoke in his class at lunchtime. We had those classroom huts/mobiles. His was the furthest away from the main school and it was there most of the smokers went to smoke behind his class. Every so often a teacher would come up to catch the smokers and dish out a gew detentions.
The Chemistry teacher that used that hut was sound, and used to let a few of us in there to smoke and chat, he'd often sit with us. Proper sound teacher that I'm sure was near unheard of in a northern Grammar school.

Selected

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

Very good...you can hear the Ennio Morricone "Aah-eee-ahh-ee-ah!" in the background. Reminds me of a scene from Joyce's Dubliners:

FYI

Clint would have shot Joyce.

PS - Morricone was a thief.

Put that in your windmill and smoke it.

Kind Regards,

Can't remember who I'm supposed to be!

Oh yeah, impertinent ruffian.

owenc

Savage Tyrant wrote: »

We actually had a Chemistry teacher that let a few of us smoke in his class at lunchtime. We had those classroom huts/mobiles. His was the furthest away from the main school and it was there most of the smokers went to smoke behind his class. Every so often a teacher would come up to catch the smokers and dish out a gew detentions.
The Chemistry teacher that used that hut was sound, and used to let a few of us in there to smoke and chat, he'd often sit with us. Proper sound teacher that I'm sure was near unheard of in a northern Grammar school.

what the hell is sound?

Savage Tyrant

owenc wrote: »

what the hell is sound?

Sound = Dead on

Redzer7

One time when the class was in complete silence one lad who probably talked twice the whole year asked the strictest teacher in the middle of an exam is a Jaffa Cake a biscuit, or a cake." She said "pardon?"
He then repeated himself in a deeper voice, "Is a Jaffa Cake a biscuit or a cake answer the question!!"
She then start roaring the head off him and he wasn't talking back it was like the cat got his tongue.
He then says, "I don't like Jaffa Cake Biscuits anyways,
I just wanted your opinion on the matter" and she ran a muck again.
He kinda backed down at the end but it was one of those "You had to have been there" moments.
It's always the quiet ones, so unexpected :P.

Selected

Savage Tyrant wrote: »

Sound = Dead on

Every thread has potential - and the potential are, unfortunately, miscreants.

Savage Tyrant

Selected wrote: »

Every thread has potential - and the potential are, unfortunately, miscreants.

Wooosh!!....ya lost me! lol

Selected

Savage Tyrant wrote: »

Wooosh!!....ya lost me! lol

Just keep looking up as the Universe passes you by.:)

Krusader

keep looking down your nose at people and eventually it will be broken

Selected

Got a bit carried away yesterday evening - just woken up with a rather sore nose.

Selected

Got a bit carried away yesterday evening - just woken up with a rather sore nose.

Minxy Moo

As a tecaher, i've never had a student say anything too bad! But lads are cheeky and try their luck, its what they do. All part the job

m@cc@

Selected wrote: »

Got a bit carried away yesterday evening - just woken up with a rather sore nose.

Selected wrote: »

Got a bit carried away yesterday evening - just woken up with a rather sore nose.

And amnesia?

Minxy Moo

That helps too

AAAAAAAHHH

paul 101 wrote: »

i'm in college now, but when i was in school we siad all sorts of cheecky things to ever

althought i'm not proud of it, one of our teacher was giving out to another student n i turned round n shout "ara miss, will ya stop mouthing will ya!!!" don't know why i did it

that was everyday stuff but it's just to give you an example
i hope ye share ye'r stories

And she's probably still teaching and you're semi-illiterate. Look who's laughing now.