Am I mad??

LegacyUser

Would just like to hear any opinions on this. I'm trying for another baby, am now in my late 30s, was last pregnant almost 11years ago. I'd really love another baby, but put it off so long as my last child has a disability that would have a small enough chance of happening again. I've spoken to my doctor about it, and have taken a course of action to help prevent this. Apparently the risk is now further reduced to 1 in 100. But a big part of me is scared that if I do get pregnant, something will be wrong. Also I'm worried a bit about my age, though doctor assured me I'm still young enough! Anyway, trying 5 months now and nothing yet. To be honest I'm mad to get pregnant but know if I'm lucky enough to conceive I'll worry myself sick till I find out if all is ok. Also worried what would do if something is wrong as we've had an awful lot of worry with our 10yr old. But what scares me more is not trying and never knowing. Am I mad ??!

Cat Melodeon

I find I mostly regret the things I didn't do, not the things I did. This is a completely personal decision for you and your family. If the worst case scenario is another child with the same condition as your 10 year old, how bad would that be? Could you cope with that?

Your doctor obviously thinks you're in good health and capable of having another perfectly healthy child. Having had a previous child with health problems, you would probably be offered extra check-ups and scans during any future pregnancy, which might help to put your mind at ease. You don't want to be a ball of stress though - would it help to speak to someone who is a specialist in the area first?

jordata

Wabs,
I found myself pregnant in my late 30's - totally unplanned. Had 2 other school going children at the time. I worried and fussed and paniced through the pregnancy in case anything would go wrong. That baby is now 4 and prefect thank god. Full of life and fun. Can't imagine how empty my life would be without her. My only regret is all the time I should have been enjoying my pregnancy I was worrying. Go for it Wabs and enjoy every minute of it. Life is to short for worrying about stuff that will most likely never happen.
Good luck

mrsberries

Dont have any experience to share or any advice I could give, but completely agree with the others regarding regrets. Go with your heart and best of luck with everything

LegacyUser

Hi there, thanks so much for your replies,it was so good to read them. Am going to go with the heart on this one and stay positive should I conceive. Weighing it up, I have another totally healthy child of 17, so I know I am capable of this. And as one poster says my doctor thinks so too. Also, it would do our 10yr old the world of good to have a little one to dote on, she'd love that! Thankfully, she has a mild enough form of the disability, and leads a full life, though has been through some rough times ,and it does affect her life on a day to day basis. I suppose my fear would be having a child with a more severe form of it. But what is meant to be will be, and hopefully things will turn out for the best, should I be lucky enough to fall pregnant again. Thanks again everyone!