ladies . . .worst pick up line????

A V A

ladies . . . . what is the worst pick line you have ever heard or said to you . . . . did they work , did they make you laugh ???

lets share some storys:D:D

Scarinae

Alas, this one was not used on me but I was there when it happened!

There was a group of us in a pub, Smirnoff had just launched a new drink and were doing a promotion where everyone could try one for free. There was a bit of a crush at the bar as a result, with people trying to get a free drink before they ran out of them.

One of the girls with us was waiting for her drink, and a guy next to her turned and said "Phew, I'm sweating!"

She kinda nodded and smiled politely, and turned back towards the bar.

Then he said "I'm sweating cos you're so hot!"

She was like, errr... Ummm... What?

He was like, "No really! Feel my forehead!", and tried to grab her hand and put it on his big sweaty face She just grabbed her drink and ran!

Ah, why do the good ones never go for me?! :pac:

Emme

An Italian guy said to me: Your eyes are like spanners

Me: Why?

Him: Every time you look at me my nuts get tighter!:rolleyes:

c00kie m0nster

I heard a guy on the bus calling out to girl one morning on the way to school a few years ago. She was having none of his advances and he replied "Come on baby, don't be picky... I wasn't!"

Asphyxia

Haha! Great thread!

The most horrid one I've heard.
Are those space pants because you ass is outta this world!

In my experience some of the cute guys can pull them off but thats because there cute. Come to think of it I think my fella asked me one ha!

Mackleton

Worst I can remember (there have been a few unfortunately)

Him: (walks up on the dance floor holding out a bit of his jumper)
"Hey, could you tell me something?"
Me: Em, yeah, what?

Him: What sort of material is this? (holding out jumper)

Me: Mm, I dunno, wool maybe?

Him: (winking) No, thats boyfriend material! (Grinning madly)

Needless to say, I had to laugh and give him credit for originality!

Delicate_Dlite

A guy walks over from across the bar, rather quickly, eyes not raising from my breasts, "Are those beauties real?". :rolleyes:

xoixo

Sleazy Greek told me I look like a Barbie doll - he really thought that was a brilliant compliment as well. Couldn't understand when I didn't take it well and told him I didn't want to look like a barbie, thanks.

Also, "is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven?"

A V A

hahaha
god they are ridiculous !!!!! hehehe


there not getting old atal

The Big Red Button

I have to admit, I once used the classic Fat Penguin as a chat up line.

(It worked! )

Scarinae

chatterpillar wrote: »

I have to admit, I once used the classic Fat Penguin as a chat up line.

(It worked! )

Hey, it breaks the ice!

The Lovely Muffin

One time when myself and the family were abroad on holidays in Tunisia and were walking down a street and this guy from one of the restaurant's ran down the street after us and said to me 'you come back when you 18 and we get married my princess' - I ain't been back to that country since!

Delicate_Dlite

A good friend of mine, actually uses this line on women, luckily, he's hot.

"Did you just fart?, becase you just blew me away."

xxchloexx

"does your dad work for jacobs cause you're a craker" ha found that one funny.

oh and in a bar some guy came up with an ice cube smashed it on the counter and said "now that i've broken the ice whats your name? " couldn't ignore him after that he had me in stitches laughing!

or "lets replace the alphabet and put U and I together" cringeee:o

sky88

my friend went up to a girl and licked her on her face then proceeded to get a drink thrown over him good times haha

3hn2givr7mx1sc

xxchloexx wrote: »

oh and in a bar some guy came up with an ice cube smashed it on the counter and said "now that i've broken the ice whats your name? " couldn't
ignore him after that he had me in stitches laughing!

I'm so trying that.:D

Silverfish

baz2009 wrote: »

I'm so trying that.:D

Can I recommend practising this beforehand, icecubes can be hard to smash on a bar and can end up scooting off and causing an incident.

Just saying. Never happened to me. *cough*

3hn2givr7mx1sc

Silverfish wrote: »

Can I recommend practising this beforehand, icecubes can be hard to smash on a bar and can end up scooting off and causing an incident.

Just saying. Never happened to me. *cough*

That could be the only kink in my plan.:pac:

how do you like your eggs in the morning fertilised ? yeah i laughed

"You dont need a weapon too kill smeone, your smile is enough"

LAAAAAAME.

charmer

Not exactly the chat up line itself but rather the situation, extremely lame attempt...
About to get off the bus at my stop yesterday, driver says oh are you going to ____ (popular bar near my stop), I say no i'm going home. "Oh, so you don't want to meet me there for a drink later then?"
Awkward silence while I wait for him to open the doors and then jump out and power walk away
Why do I attract the weirdos?!

sarmer

A few years ago in Paris I met this American dude in a bar and got chatting to him. He was very impressed with the fact that I was Irish and came out with this - "Your accent is like cupid's arrow right through my heart!" I was very embarrassed as all of my friends heard and burst out laughing! Needless to say I made my excuses and left.

Contessa Raven

I've posted this before but it's the worst one I've had directed at me.
I was on the LUAS with my boyfriend around a year and a half ago and a junkie got on and sat opposite us. This is how the conversation went:

Junkie to OH: Here, is that your bird?
OH: Yeah.
Junkie: She's f***ing gorgeous!
OH: Thanks.
Junkie to me: Here love, do you fancy comin' home with me? I can wrap it around me leg twice!
Me: Er... No thanks!

My boyfriend was not impressed!

ems_12

My sister was waiting at the bar when a guy starting chatting her up...

guy: "So, are you having a good night?"
Sis: "em, yeh..."
guy: "can I make it any better?" :cool:

reallyrose

ems_12 wrote: »

My sister was waiting at the bar when a guy starting chatting her up...

guy: "So, are you having a good night?"
Sis: "em, yeh..."
guy: "can I make it any better?" :cool:

I actually kinda like that one!

magneticimpulse

This is one which I use:
"Hey you might not be the most beautiful man in the world, but....
Beauty is only a lightswitch Away"

I love it...its so bad, guys dont expect it. Works everytime

"My love for you is like diarrhea, i just cant keep it in!!"

Ah man, im giving all the good ones away (im a girl and use these lines on blokes and they love it hehe)

Brendog

I was a bar with my girlfriend and this drunk guys comes up and says to her, "Here love you know what you remind me of? The hottest bird ever"

and as quick as a flash she says "Well you remind me of the Titanic.. you broke the ice, then you crash and burned"


he stumbled off into the night...

barryfitz

sky88 wrote: »

my friend went up to a girl and licked her on her face then proceeded to get a drink thrown over him good times haha

Is your friends name Gordo by any chance?

Antomus Prime

A friend of mine was out with me one night but wasnt drinking. He had a pint of water and walked up to a girl at the bar and put his finger in his water, then rubbed it on the girls top and said "now lets get you out of those wet clothes!"

I was looking from the other side of the bar waiting for him to get a slap but to my complete surprise she engaged him in conversation and they spent the night playing tonsil tennis, must try it some night lol!!

gym_mom

My all time favourite... "Get your coat, you've scored !!!"

Vinta81

When visiting Zululand in SA in April, one of the Zulu men grabbed me and hugged me and said " you worth 1000 cows". The most a Zulu man usually pays for a woman is 11 cows :pac:

Sound Bite

I was out one night with one of my friends who is stunning looking.

This very drunk guy came out with this great line

"99% of the men in this place would probably prefer your friend, but not me I think you're far better looking than her,"

He couldn't understand why I didn't take this as a huge compliment!!!

cazzycaz

I was working in a bar in England when an Irish guy came in and asked me 'have i any Irish in me' I said no and he said 'would you like some ?'

charmer

gym_mom wrote: »

My all time favourite... "Get your coat, you've scored !!!"

One i've been so tempted to use on a guy - "Get your coat, you'll do.."

pow wow

"I'd take me up on it if I were you, I don't see them queueing up for ya like..."

Be still my beating heart.

trebor28

Contessa Raven wrote: »

Junkie to me: Here love, do you fancy comin' home with me? I can wrap it around me leg twice!

cant understand how this would be appealing, if he could do this when flaccid then he'd be about a metre long when erect!!:eek:

Fago!

charmer wrote: »

One i've been so tempted to use on a guy - "Get your coat, you'll do.."

Charmer by name, charmer by nature. :rolleyes:

Some lad says to me last week on facebook :

Him: Can I tell ya something?
Me: Shoot.
Him: You're so cute.
Me: Awww thanx
Him: I'd break you!
Me: "......Fago is offline....."

Nulty

charmer wrote: »

One i've been so tempted to use on a guy - "Get your coat, you'll do.."

/coat

Improbable

Guy: Hey, are you drunk?

Female friend: No...

Guy: Well that's not good, how can I hit on you if you're not drunk.

Lets just say she didnt appreciate it.

bigtuna

I was going into my flat one night about 3ish. I live in town, This guy was looking for directions so I told him how to get to where he wanted to go. He then said "Can I stay with you?". Eh no and then he said "I'll even shag ya!". I managed to restrain myself :rolleyes:

christ on a bike!

How would you like to be buried with my people?

reallyrose

christ on a bike! wrote: »

How would you like to be buried with my people?

Jayus, I even have a good farm o' land. *rubs knees*

gym_mom

Years ago a group of my friends and I went down to Lisdoonvarna for the "matchmaking festival" Now we were all early 20's and out for a laugh and by no means looking for a batchelor !! But on the Sunday morning an 80 something year old asked my friend up to dance, being a geryatric nurse at the time she couldn't bring herself to refuse. While on the dance floor he said "I've a fine house and a big farm o'land, will ya marry me ?" . No joke, she fell off the dancefloor laughin, poor old fella was highly insulted and couldn't believe he'd been turned down.

Junior D

A favoured chat-up line of mine:

"I may not be the best looking guy in here, but hey, I'm the only one talking to you."

Mysteriously never works

My friend was told this one,

"Let me take ya home, & i'll make ****s of your box"

He, couldnt understand her disgust.

Esel

Deleted User wrote: »

My friend was told this one,

"Let me take ya home, & i'll make ****s of your box"

He, couldnt understand her disgust.

Trying to figure what ****s is, in the box context.....

starbelgrade

esel wrote: »

Trying to figure what ****s is, in the box context.....

Slops?

Flojo

sh!ts?

Killer Wench

I was in a New Orleans bar when a drunken guy walks up to me and says:

"When a White woman asks her husband what he is eating, he says 'Nut'n Honey' but when a Black woman asks her husband what he is eating, he says "Nuthin' B**ch!".

He then asks me if I want to go back to his condo.

spudd

Had a sleazy italian come up my desk at work, in the middle of the day, where he told me I shouldn't look him in the eye, because he might fall in love with me...yawn...

Silverfish

Alright people, less rape jokes and insinuations please.