Banned from PaC

Novella

I'm not actually sure if PaC is allowed to be mentioned because it's a private forum etc., but hey, I'm not a member anymore so I guess I don't have to follow the rules.

My problem is that I have had my access removed from PaC for a very petty, and personal reason - who my boyfriend is.

My boyfriend is an ex PaC member whose access was removed and he then received an infraction, which no longer stands as he explained himself.

I get along really well with many of the members in PaC, and have never had any trouble in posting there. I also never once betrayed the confidentiality of the forum, and I enjoyed being able to get to know posters better in such a tight-knit community.

However, having had my access taken away in such a manner leaves a bitter taste. Sharpshooter didn't even PM me to let me know that I was no longer a member, and I had to PM her myself for a reason.

She said had she have known who my boyfriend was, I would never even have been considered for PaC. Tbh, I just find the whole incident really immature, catty and also hurtful. I've been an active and avid poster on Boards for the last year and a half, and I expect to be judged on my own posting history, and not my choice of boyfriend and/or his actions in the past - which have no relation to me.

I am insulted that she considers me to be "a risk to privacy" because I am, and have always been, so far from that. I think that the way in which I have been treated is unfair, and this is why I am here, posting in Help Desk.

Beruthiel

PaC is a private forum and they are free to apply or remove access as they wish.
We have advised the mod that a polite PM to you informing you that your access was being removed would have been the best way to go about it.

Novella

Beruthiel wrote: »

PaC is a private forum and they are free to apply or remove access as they wish.
We have advised the mod that a polite PM to you informing you that your access was being removed would have been the best way to go about it.

Tbh, I just don't think that this is good enough. I'm not one to kick up a fuss. In fact, I am seriously non-confrontational, but the manner in which I have been treated by "the mod" isn't appropriate.

A polite PM informing me that my access was being removed would not have been the best way to go about it. I didn't do anything to deserve a retraction of my access. I am raising serious questions over "the mods" ability to be a mod because she clearly isn't able to separate her own emotions from her duty to the forum.

Who I choose to go out with is of no concern to her, and her dislike of my boyfriend should not automatically rule me out of participation in the forum. It's completely ridiculous. Resorting to these kind of playground tactics is out of line.

Is there anywhere else I can take my concern, because I am content with this outcome?

Novella

I meant NOT content.

Beruthiel

Novella wrote: »

TI am raising serious questions over "the mods" ability to be a mod because she clearly isn't able to separate her own emotions from her duty to the forum.

It's her private forum. How she runs it is up to her, as long as it is within the acceptable limits of this site.

Resorting to these kind of playground tactics is out of line.

I do not disagree with you.

Is there anywhere else I can take my concern, because I am content with this outcome?

No. There is no where else you can take your concern. It's a private forum and it is entirely within the remit of private forums to grant and deny access at will. That is the point of a private forum.

Novella

I don't know what to say to you at this stage. Can just anyone have their own private forum then? Because I know I sure as hell would be able to manage one far more adequately. It's outrageous how I've been treated. I would never ever resort to such absolutely petty measures.

I have always been very fond of Boards, and I admired the fact that users being treated with respect was one of the top priorities. Was I wrong? It seems ludicrous that 'the mod' can suddenly decide I am not worthy of her forum. I didn't do anything wrong.

I'm sorry I'm arguing with you, 'cause I know it must be a complete pain for you to have to sort out other peoples messes but this really is not okay. I don't want any other member of Boards to be accepted into PaC and then suddenly discarded because 'the mod' simply feels it. If nothing else, it is bullying and I, nor anyone else, deserves it.

Zaph

While your anger is completely understandable, as Beruthiel stated, private forums don't necessarily have to adhere to the same set of rules that regular forums do. They are hosted forums, which means that Boards merely provides a platform for someone to run their own forum. Who they decide to allow or deny access to is entirely up to them.

Novella

Zaph, I appreciate that this is putting you and any other admin who choses to deal with this in an awkward position, but I'm not going to let it go.

I understand private forums, so reiterating the point about access etc. being up to the mod entirely isn't necessary. I get it. The problem here isn't access. If I'd done something within breach of the forum charter, I wouldn't be here. But I didn't.

There has got be some kind of rules for private forums too. If I was banned from After Hours, or The Ladies Lounge because a mod didn't like my boyfriend, would that be acceptable? No. My boyfriend is my personal life, and no way in hell will I have it held against me.

Sharpshooter should not be able to act like a spoiled child throwing her toys out of the pram. It makes no difference whether the forum is private or not, rules have got to come into play and a mod excluding me FOR MY PRIVATE LIFE is unacceptable.

I know that I'm in the right here, and I won't be bullied and like I said, a stand has to be made somewhere. I'm not the only person who has been upset by this decision. It was rash modding, power tripping and no one has been able to argue convincingly that Sharpshooter acted appropriately - because she didn't.

Modding of private forum has got to come under some kind of rules as well. Treating people in this manner is downright horrible. I'm not walking away.

oscarBravo

Novella wrote: »

It makes no difference whether the forum is private or not...

On the contrary, that's exactly what makes the difference. There are several private hosted forums on the site which have their own rules as to who is and isn't allowed access.

I completely understand that you're unhappy about being removed from the forum, but by the same token there may be others who are unhappy about never having been granted access in the first place. We're not going to intervene on their behalf, and I don't see that we're in a position to intervene on yours.

Novella

oscarBravo wrote: »

On the contrary, that's exactly what makes the difference. There are several private hosted forums on the site which have their own rules as to who is and isn't allowed access.

I completely understand that you're unhappy about being removed from the forum, but by the same token there may be others who are unhappy about never having been granted access in the first place. We're not going to intervene on their behalf, and I don't see that we're in a position to intervene on yours.

That's ridiculous, because people who have never been granted access wouldn't know about the forum in the first place. I am being discriminated against. I was granted access because users in the forum wanted me there, and my access was removed why? Because the mod dislikes my boyfriend. Are you for real?

I never argue mod decisions, ever, but this is completely out of order. It's downright nasty, and you can try defend SS as much as you like but you know as well as I do that this isn't acceptable and I know that your hands are tied due to his whole private forum thing, but mods should not be allowed bully users in this manner anywhere on site.

Zaph

Novella wrote: »

you can try defend SS as much as you like

I've yet to see any admin defending the decision to ban you. All that has been stated is that it's a private forum with its own rules for admission.

Novella wrote: »

you know as well as I do that this isn't acceptable and I know that your hands are tied due to his whole private forum thing, but mods should not be allowed bully users in this manner anywhere on site.

OK, so you've stated that you know the admins' hands are tied, so what is it exactly that you expect us to do then?

If it was me banned in such an arbitrary manner I'd probably be mad as well, but tbh any forum where I was treated like that is not one I'd want to remain a member of anyway.

Novella

Oh, I don't want my access back! God, no!

I want you to take a look at private forum charters. I want to know why it is acceptable for mods of private forums to bully other users? I did try to start a thread in Feedback, but typically it was locked after a few minutes.

I do have support, so I am not alone in my annoyance at how modding of private forums is being handled. I am actually really sorry that this is still on-going, and tbh, I can't stand coming here and arguing with any of you.

It's just that none of this sits quite right within the ethos of Boards. There is no respecting the user, no general 'don't be a dick' in play. Why are private forums falling so far outside the rules of the site?

What do I want you to do? I want you to sort that out. I want Sharpshooter to apologise to me for writing me off in the manner that she did, considering I never once did anything to deserve it. I just want to be treated fairly, and I don't think that's too much to ask.

Beruthiel

Let me explain again how a Private Forum works Novella.

It's private. What goes on in there, stays in there.
Setting up a Help Desk thread is not within the remit of private forums. The Help Desk forum is for public forums only.

The Mod of a private forum can grant and remove access at will. It is their private forum and they get to decide who gets access.

Now SS could have handled this differently, BUT, she is within her rights to ban anyone she wishes.
If you want an apology from her, drop her a PM and ask her for one.
End of discussion.