best scumbag story

major bill

happyfriday74 wrote: »

Do you guys remember this guy, used to hang about westmoreland street, he puts on a fake english accent and tells you some sob story that he just got off the ferry and needs cash to get a bus or something. He been around for years!

let me guess he had all his luggage robbed????

ha no way i got done by this guy years ago i remember walking away after giving him a fiver and me ex gf nearly boxing the head of me for doing it :pac:

happyfriday74

Yeah that him, he asks for a 5er and I gave him 2 yoyos, got a cheers bruver in response.

Ran into him a year later when I worked nearby and he asked me the same question. I rather checkly told him that he really oucht to bring his ATm card with him when he gets the ferry!

He know my face now and doesnt try it again, very funny when you hear him speaking his natural tongue of inner ciity Dublinese when he isn't in charactor!

Fair play though, at least he has a harmless pitch, got surrounded one after the temple theatre and boxed in by 3 lads looking for cash,clearly they meant to take it by force if it wasnt given by choice luckly a copper happened to walk by!

RMD

happyfriday74 wrote: »

Do you guys remember this guy, used to hang about westmoreland street, he puts on a fake english accent and tells you some sob story that he just got off the ferry and needs cash to get a bus or something. He been around for years!

Think he's got a new story for the people. I've been asked twice by a "traveller" who's "lost his family because they're travellers" and "needs money to stay in a hostel until I find". Don't think the accent has worn off him yet because they'res still a hint of an English accent to him.

Edit: Going past the Parnell street entrance to the Ilac I saw some scumbag getting carried out to a Garda van by about 6 Gards in total. Guy was putting up a fight, kicking about and jerking his arms and body all over the place. Just as the Gards are about to throw him into the back of the van he gives his upper body some almighty jerk and the 3 Gards holding his arms / torso lose their grip, causing the knacker to fall out of their arms and crack his head off the bottom of the doorway of the van.

Think he broke his nose because blood was streaming down his face, didn't put up a fight after that.

pebbles21

Was in the Donameade Inn watching a match,there is a regular who drinks there whos confined to an electric wheelchair who is paralyzed from the neck down(anyone from around there will know who i mean)and hes also a ringer for Christy Brown,even sounds like him,got the beard even drinks his pint from a straw

Anyhow this Little Scumbag was over whispering in his ear, and at the same time dropping his hand behind his wheelchair where "Christy" has his money in a little zip up bag(normally has a carer with him to get his money for him but not sure why he didnt this time)

So just as i noticed this and was about to have a word with the scumbag,three other lads jumped up before me,grabbed your man, gave him a few slaps,pulled him to the ground,stud on his neck and made him repeatably say "Im sorry Christy" and "Respect for Da" till the novelty wore off, then Fcuked him out the door!

D.R cowboy

pebbles21 wrote: »

Was in the Donameade Inn watching a match,there is a regular who drinks there whos confined to an electric wheelchair who is parallelized from the neck down(anyone from around there will know who i mean)and hes also a ringer for Christy Brown,even sounds like him,got the beard even drinks his pint from a straw

Anyhow this Little Scumbag was over whispering in his ear, and at the same time dropping his hand behind his wheelchair where "Christy" has his money in a little zip up bag(normally has a carer with him to get his money for him but not sure why he didnt this time)

So just as i noticed this and was about to have a word with the scumbag,three other lads jumped up before me,grabbed your man, gave him a few slaps,pulled him to the ground,stud on his neck and made him repeatably say "Im sorry Christy" and "Respect for Da" till the novelty wore off, then Fcuked him out the door!

I would shake your hand if I ever meet you man, we need to stand together and fight the scum
also i have been doing some research and there is a new law which lets you hit anyone who is trying to rob your gaff, and they can not sue you any more

AAAAAAAHHH

pebbles21 wrote: »

Was in the Donameade Inn watching a match,there is a regular who drinks there whos confined to an electric wheelchair who is parallelized from the neck down(anyone from around there will know who i mean)and hes also a ringer for Christy Brown,even sounds like him,got the beard even drinks his pint from a straw

Anyhow this Little Scumbag was over whispering in his ear, and at the same time dropping his hand behind his wheelchair where "Christy" has his money in a little zip up bag(normally has a carer with him to get his money for him but not sure why he didnt this time)

So just as i noticed this and was about to have a word with the scumbag,three other lads jumped up before me,grabbed your man, gave him a few slaps,pulled him to the ground,stud on his neck and made him repeatably say "Im sorry Christy" and "Respect for Da" till the novelty wore off, then Fcuked him out the door!

Parallel to what? Sometimes I'm parallelized from the neck down as well. If I'm standing next to a wall for example.

Brendog

sensibleken wrote: »

is that the really short guy with glasses. his sticks out his hand and points at his ear. I see him in town and around rathmines. the other day i saw him get a few quid of this old woman then walk straight into the news agent and up to the lotto stand

THATS THE GUY!!!

hes a disgusting little stump of a person. keep an eye out for him man!!

left_behind

Many moons ago at the Witness festival 2 scumbags sat down beside my tent at 4am while i was trying to get some sleep.
Scumbag 1: Im bleedin freezin
Scumbag 2: Im diein of the hyperthermic
Scumbag 1: What the **** is hyperthermic
Scumbag 2: (long dramatic pause easily a minute for the legendry reply) Its when ur fookin freezing.
To be fair it was cold but i had a sleeping bag and tent

Brendog

not_xanthor wrote: »

There's a variation on this which involves the girlfriend or sister having a miscarriage and the gentleman in question needing to get to some other town.


..and yes they do tend to pick me out of a crowd.

yeah its seriously annoying....

love how everyone knows who they are just by there ridiculous stories

pebbles21

AAAAAAAHHH wrote: »

Parallel to what? Sometimes I'm parallelized from the neck down as well. If I'm standing next to a wall for example.

OK paralyzed then .....fecking american spell checker

sligopark

Another absolute classic - Athlone Scumbags

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oZTW30fAQY

a chap to be kept away from Dublin Zoo - and a mamma that needs to turn her child over to foster

Gunsfortoys

sligopark wrote: »

Another absolute classic - Athlone Scumbags

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oZTW30fAQY

a chap to be kept away from Dublin Zoo - and a mamma that needs to turn her child over to foster

Only the 10th time that has been posted in this thread.:rolleyes:

sligopark

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

Only the 10th time that has been posted in this thread.:rolleyes:

should read more closely but a classic all the same Guns

stepbar

Seen a junkie drop her bottoms on the Millenium bridge during lunch a couple of months ago..... that put me off my lunch....

dazberry

One of the local well known not too bright petty criminals where I grew up tried to rob the post office and the story goes like this:

> Anto runs into post office wearing a balaclava and wielding a baseball bat
> Anto: Give me the f**ing money
> Postie: Ah f**k off Anto, we know it's you
> Anto: It's not me - right !!!!!!

D.

CiaranMT

Deleted User wrote: »

Not a dramatically scummy story, but coming from a very scummy family (actually they've become more of a race on their own these days...)
They come into my work all the time, normally they try to rob all round them but on this occassion they decided to pay for once and not bother...one of the wee lads that works with us had the pleasure of serving them. One of the mothers comes up to him at the till with the products, he puts it through, tell her its 24 quid, she then reaches down her top, inside her bra, rummages around for a min then pulls out 2 tens... his little face was classic enough at this point, but then she puts her hand down the other side and pulls out a pile of coins!! I just had to walk away and laugh, thing is like she had a handbag and pockets so why the hell keep your money in your bra, especially coins! Nothing them people do anymore shocks me...

This ^^^.

Happened me tonight while serving a lady at the tills. Gas out

coughlan08

wobzilla1 wrote: »

A few years back, Some little scummer started working in the supermarket where I worked. I found out from my da that he was actually on some sort of back to work scheme and had just been released from trinity house (my da worked there). Anyway he didn't last very long in the shop and ended up back in trinity house.
Then about 2 years ago, I found out that he had stolen a car in Limerick and crashed it. I lolled when I heard he was dead

god your sad boi...:rolleyes:

Run_to_da_hills

Two scumbags were caught pelting rocks at the fire service at a local halloween bonfire. Both of were cuffed together and thrown into the back of the mariah. The cops continued around to several other estates rounding up more of them.

The two lads hopped out at the first oppertunity and legged it. They called the local locksmith at about 2AM to see if he could open the cuffs. The locksmith wouldnt entertain them because word would only get back. He advised them to go to the barrix with a good excuse.

The next morning both of them went down and explained, "Garda, we were bursting for a pi*ss in the back of the van, when it stopped we hopped out to take it and then it took off without us".

Duck's hoop

Run_to_da_hills wrote: »

called the local locksmith

As you do.

Run_to_da_hills

Duck's hoop wrote: »

As you do.

These guys would have been brainless.

Locksmith was local and well known to them.

I would have got someone with a 4" angle grinder, bench vice, a very steady hand and a bucket of water.

D.R cowboy

coughlan08 wrote: »

god your sad boi...:rolleyes:

LMAO at your Irish religious sympathy for bad people:D

OutlawPete

Walking past the junction of Marlborough St and Talbot St on Saturday and this bloke shakes this guys hand as his bird is hurrying him along.

As he walks away after wishing him well, he remembers something and shouts after him at the top of his voice:

Nutjob: "Remember the times I used to stay your gaff Johnner"

Johnner: "I do, I do indeed".

Nutjob: "And did anything ever go missing on ya?"

Johnner: "Not once."

Nutjob walks off proud as punch.

zuroph

Run_to_da_hills wrote: »

Two scumbags were caught pelting rocks at the fire service at a local halloween bonfire. Both of were cuffed together and thrown into the back of the mariah. The cops continued around to several other estates rounding up more of them.

The two lads hopped out at the first oppertunity and legged it. They called the local locksmith at about 2AM to see if he could open the cuffs. The locksmith wouldnt entertain them because word would only get back. He advised them to go to the barrix with a good excuse.

The next morning both of them went down and explained, "Garda, we were bursting for a pi*ss in the back of the van, when it stopped we hopped out to take it and then it took off without us".

and you know this truthful story how?

citizenerased1

OutlawPete wrote: »

Walking past the junction of Marlborough St and Talbot St on Saturday and this bloke shakes this guys hand as his bird is hurrying him along.

As he walks away after wishing him well, he remembers something and shouts after him at the top of his voice:

Nutjob: "Remember the times I used to stay your gaff Johnner"

Johnner: "I do, I do indeed".

Nutjob: "And did anything ever go missing on ya?"

Johnner: "Not once."

Nutjob walks off proud as punch.

id be proud too if i was him...johnner never noticed a thing

Run_to_da_hills

zuroph wrote: »

and you know this truthful story how?

I knew the locksmith.

DOC09UNAM

Run_to_da_hills wrote: »

I knew the locksmith.

intersting how the locksmith knew every part of the story, even when he wasn't involved.


AH has more imaginary posts than a forum on dreams.

Too many people looking for "thanks".

Anna Molly

Today around half three I was on the Luas heading towards Busarus when three lovely gentlemen...:rolleyes: got on. Two of them had that proper inbred look about them, and the other was massive, wearing a filthy tracksuit and the conversation went as so..
Massive Guy: I was paying 300 euros a month for de gym but den I bough one of dose weigh machines, like dey have in prison.

Inbred 1: Ahhh yeeee

Massive Guy: Gonna be a bleedin tank! Dis guy on Merchant's Quay one day stabbed me, for no reason. 16 times, stabbed in me three lungs [:eek:wow]
I had to run all the bleedin way to Abbey Street for an ambulance.

Inbred 1/2: ahh jaysis

Massive Guy: Well he aint alive anymore.
Did I tell ye? Dis morning walkin out me estate dis guy came up with a bleedin massive knife, saying I owe him money from before I went ta prison, i said if you're gonna stab me with dah, ya better run!
So I'm gonna get built first, like a tank and den get me revenge

Inbreds: laughing in joy-ah yeeee, get em when dey least expect it

Massive Guy: I'm gonna be bleedin massive! Anyway is dis fookin luas gonna stop?!?

He proceeded to get off at Abbey Street and stand by the ticket machines, begging for money. I swear to holy baby jesus, that's not a word of a lie. My boyfriend and I were sitting there trying not to burst ourselves from laughing!

tman

DOC09UNAM wrote: »

intersting how the locksmith knew every part of the story, even when he wasn't involved.


AH has more imaginary posts than a forum on dreams.

Too many people looking for "thanks".

The title of the thread is best scumbag story... Last time I checked, a story can be fictitious.
So what if it "happened" to the friend of a friend of a friend of the poster, as long as the story is amusing it shouldn't really matter!

Lando Griffin

Reganio 2 wrote: »

Your right, that bloke that spit in your man's face is a big scumbag. The bloke banging the cars and what not might have been a scumbag but spitting in someone's face is just disgusting.

Play with fire expect to get burnt.

Yes, I agree it was a disgusting thing to do, but the he deserved it.

He might think twice before he does it again.

danniemcq

Was working for the funfair for few months and we had a one off event in Dublin. Had few drinks and tried to meet up with mates after they had been at Daft Punk gig, was near Stephens Green and some wee scumbag came walking up to me. He asked if i had a light said i didn't smoke, he then asked for a fag, said again i didn't smoke so he asked for my wallet instead and swung a bottle at my head and caught me nicely i'll give him that.

Being slightly drunk and thick skulled the blow didn't take much outta me so i took step forward and swung my fist as hard as i could (i'm scrawny myself but funfair helped here) into his nose and he hit the ground moaning. walked away only then realising i was bleeding quite bad and then i got lost...

a mix of good times bad times that night but mostly good