How forgiving are you

LilMsss

I don't want to go into exact details for understandable reasons, but in the last day or so, my Dad couldn't swallow, so couldn't ingest pain medication etc.

The only reason we agreed to a nurse in the last few days was to administer the pain meds through injections, and when he needed an injection, she refused to give it, as he had received one 3.5 hours earlier. Our GP had assured us that he would give him all and any medications needed to make him comfortable, but he was unavailable that night and we were stuck with that nurse.

I'm not sure what happened with that individual but I think she may have received a warning.

CDfm

Its always difficult to know whether or not to bring a person home or not.

My parents are both alive but a few years back both were ill and I commuted a long distance several times a week -as it was safer for them to be home because of one of those bug outbreaks.

SugarHigh

LilMsss wrote: »

I totally agree, if and when you are unlucky enough for it to happen to a family member, the concept of forgiveness goes out the window. My Dad died a year after he was finally told about his diagnosis, and it was a long, difficult year for everyone involved.

In the end, he decided his delayed diagnosis wasn't worth taking further as he wanted (and needed) to concentrate on his family and the time he had left. My Dad's one year anniversary was this month, so it's still raw for me, but I would have very little faith in some quarters of the medical profession.

Another issue we had that we did take further was the cancer nurse that was allocated to us the night my Dad died (he died at home) was incompetent and ill-equiped for the nature of the job she was employed to do. She totally fell apart, missed all of the obvious signs that death was imminent meaning that we were only in the room with him for the last five minutes, was incapable of administering pain medication when required, and generally just got in the way. We put in an official complaint about her.

While I admit that there are people who are both good and bad at the job that they do, and indeed others who are indifferent, the fact remains that mistakes in most professions outside of healthcare are not issues of life and death.

Quite simply, the stakes are higher when it comes to people's lives, so forgiveness of incompetence isn't nearly as easy.

The point is you have no idea what incompetence looks like unless you know how to do the job yourself.

LilMsss

I should probably add that whether or not the hospital had informed my Dad when they had done the initial diagnosis, he still would have had Stage IV cancer, and still would have died.

The one positive thing he said was that for that year that he went undiagnosed, although he knew his health was deteriorating, he lived his life as normal, without worry or depression etc.

Had they diagnosed earlier, they probably would have done high dose chemo or some other really tough treatment that would have only bought him a few extra months. I'm still angry over everything, but not bitter, and it's part of the grieving process.

When something like this happens, it's natural for us to want to blame someone. Usually, there is no one else to blame ... but in cases like this, all of the anger and frustration is focused on the individual or department deemed responsible.

SugarHigh

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

im allergic to penicillin.... I was giving it bye some, nurse, as result I got to spend an extra 2 days in hospital It wasn't really that nice :rolleyes:......

she did call round every day and said she was sorry etc... Ive never been so hot in all my life my temperature when through roof...

Wasn't particularly nice experience...

personally I don't think there's any room for any kinda of misdiagnosis or medical blunders...

especially if lives are at risk... or just the dammage a miss diagnosiss could cause some one....

Tho then again there's a guy who I don't know personally but from my locals town. He went to a doctor with what he thought was a migraine the doctor told him to go home....and take some migraleave 24 hours later he died of a brain tumor...

How can there not be any room for a misdiagnosis? Do you have any idea how vague most symptoms are and how frequent they in completely different diseases? Misdiagnoses are part of the job and it is completely acceptable to occasional misdiagnose someone because it is impossible to be always be certain, there simply isn't enough information available to the doctors, scans aren't perfect.

He went to a doctor with what he thought was a migraine the doctor told him to go home....and take some migraleave 24 hours later he died of a brain tumor

What the hell was the Doctor supposed to do? Do you know how many people get migraines that are completely harmless? Should everyone who gets a migraine automatically get a brain scan?

SugarHigh

LilMsss wrote: »

I don't want to go into exact details for understandable reasons, but in the last day or so, my Dad couldn't swallow, so couldn't ingest pain medication etc.

The only reason we agreed to a nurse in the last few days was to administer the pain meds through injections, and when he needed an injection, she refused to give it, as he had received one 3.5 hours earlier. Our GP had assured us that he would give him all and any medications needed to make him comfortable, but he was unavailable that night and we were stuck with that nurse.

I'm not sure what happened with that individual but I think she may have received a warning.

There is obviously a reason for this. She wasn't just doing it to be a bitch you know.

LilMsss

SugarHigh wrote: »

The point is you have no idea what incompetence looks like unless you know how to do the job yourself.

I would seriously dispute this: incompetence is incompetence ... failure to correctly diagnose a terminal illness in a timeframe where interventions can be done that may save or prolong life is incompetence.

I am highly educated but don't need a medical degree to know that an individual who is incapable of fulfilling the basic requirements of their job to the required standard, particularly when people's health and/or lives are in the balance is incompetence of the highest order!!!

While you are entitled to an opinion on the general topic, do not attempt to lecture me on my family's situation, or whether or not my family suffered from the incompetence of individuals within the health sector.

I have chosen to share some of the details of this personal experience to add to the discussion and help others who may have experienced similar issues. Thanks to those who have offered their support.

SugarHigh

LilMsss wrote: »

I would seriously dispute this: incompetence is incompetence ... failure to correctly diagnose a terminal illness in a timeframe where interventions can be done that may save or prolong life is incompetence.

I am highly educated but don't need a medical degree to know that an individual who is incapable of fulfilling the basic requirements of their job to the required standard, particularly when people's health and/or lives are in the balance is incompetence of the highest order!!!

While you are entitled to an opinion on the general topic, do not attempt to lecture me on my family's situation, or whether or not my family suffered from the incompetence of individuals within the health sector.

I have chosen to share some of the details of this personal experience to add to the discussion and help others who may have experienced similar issues. Thanks to those who have offered their support.

No it isn't. I don't think you know how difficult it is to diagnose cancer even for an experienced doctor , even after a scan has taken place it is still easy to miss a tumour and there are acceptable error margins.

LilMsss

SugarHigh wrote: »

No it isn't. I don't think you know how difficult it is to diagnose cancer even for an experienced doctor , even after a scan has taken place it is still easy to miss a tumour and there are acceptable error margins.

Sorry if I wasn't clear in my earlier posts. It wasn't that the hospital missed the cancer, because the tumours were large cell and fast growing so were very clear on the x-rays and scans.

It was that they diagnosed it, but didn't bother informing the patient or his GP, until it was chased up almost a year later because my Dad's health had deteriorated so quickly. It was only then that his consultant was changed and he was asked by the hospital to come in immediately.

SugarHigh

LilMsss wrote: »

Sorry if I wasn't clear in my earlier posts. It wasn't that the hospital missed the cancer, because the tumours were large cell and fast growing so were very clear on the x-rays and scans.

It was that they diagnosed it, but didn't bother informing the patient or his GP, until it was chased up almost a year later because my Dad's health had deteriorated so quickly. It was only then that his consultant was changed and he was asked by the hospital to come in immediately.

That's mistreatment not misdiagnosis so it doesn't make sense why you said that a misdiagnosis makes a Doctor incompetent.

It sounds more like an administration problem but I wouldn't be sure, you should definitely look into it.

LilMsss

SugarHigh wrote: »

That's mistreatment not misdiagnosis so it doesn't make sense why you said that a misdiagnosis makes a Doctor incompetent.

It sounds more like an administration problem but I wouldn't be sure, you should definitely look into it.

I said misdiagnosis in reference to other situations not necessarily my own. Misdiagnosis and/or mistreatment = incompetence, and not just doctors, but all of those involved in the care of sick patients.

As I stated in previous posts, my issue is with the delayed diagnosis and also the inadequate care received from the particular nurse in my personal situation. I've shared as much as I'm willing to about this, and further discussion of my situation will not add to this thread.

SugarHigh

LilMsss wrote: »

I said misdiagnosis in reference to other situations not necessarily my own. Misdiagnosis and/or mistreatment = incompetence, and not just doctors, but all of those involved in the care of sick patients.

As I stated in previous posts, my issue is with the delayed diagnosis and also the inadequate care received from the particular nurse in my personal situation. I've shared as much as I'm willing to about this, and further discussion of my situation will not add to this thread.

Misdiagnosis does not equal incompetence. Misdiagnosis can be as high as 40% in some cases because it simply is not as straight forward as you think.

CDfm

I didn't intend this thread to discuss medical issues.

It is not a good thing to focus on a loved ones final illness as there are too many what ifs that we have very little control over. My late aunt refused treatment really and unless you had been there its difficult to fathom.

So I wouldn't try to over analyse it. I think its better personnally to focus on the good times.