Public Toilets & Boys?

zuroph

wolfpawnat wrote: »

There has been a few attempted abduction cases around the south Dublin/Bray area in recent weeks. The man has attempted to abduct both boys and girls.

Man is between the ages of 20-30 years old, using either a black saloon car or white van.

I say this as there is an air show in Bray today, a perfect time to attempt another attack, mums and dads please keep an eye on your kids today in Bray, especially in the Public bathrooms along the prominade!!!!!

No there hasn't. I can say that with some authority.

Nevyn

Is that you stating you are a member of the Garda zuroph?

zuroph

Thaedydal wrote: »

Is that you stating you are a member of the Garda zuroph?

No its me stating that I know a garda in bray.

Yourself

Okay, I haven't read right to the end so excuse me if I'm echoing anyone.

OP, you shouldn't have felt you had to explain yourself to that woman, she was obviously in a mood and I would have completely blanked her (to hold my tongue).

Lets face it, there's nothing in a Ladies toilets for anyone to see aside from mirrors, sinks hand dryers and toilet doors!

I could go on for hours as a lot of people points really irritated me! :mad:

On a few occasions I allowed my OH to take my child into the Gents with him for the novelty until my son got a nasty infection the doctor told me was probably from touching it against the urinal, aside from bad language, Child molesters and bad habits, the Gents are filthy places for children, with or without supervision!

Its true that its usually someone that a child knows and trusts, who would be the one to violate them if it were to happen and bare in mind just because someone hasn't been convicted does not mean they aren't guilty. Basically it is your number one job as a parent to take care of your child, go with your gut.

CrazyRabbit

Hooperati wrote: »

So nothing could happen to a kid in a busy public toilet then,yeah right!http://www.thefreelibrary.com/GARDAI+HUNT+FOR+McDONALD'S+PERV%3B+Boy,+7,+molested+in+toilets+as+his...-a0135015254

I don't think anyone suggested that nothing could happen, only that it is extremely rare. You could say the same about just about any place really.

K-9

Yourself wrote: »

Okay, I haven't read right to the end so excuse me if I'm echoing anyone.

OP, you shouldn't have felt you had to explain yourself to that woman, she was obviously in a mood and I would have completely blanked her (to hold my tongue).

Lets face it, there's nothing in a Ladies toilets for anyone to see aside from mirrors, sinks hand dryers and toilet doors!

I could go on for hours as a lot of people points really irritated me! :mad:

On a few occasions I allowed my OH to take my child into the Gents with him for the novelty until my son got a nasty infection the doctor told me was probably from touching it against the urinal, aside from bad language, Child molesters and bad habits, the Gents are filthy places for children, with or without supervision!

Its true that its usually someone that a child knows and trusts, who would be the one to violate them if it were to happen and bare in mind just because someone hasn't been convicted does not mean they aren't guilty. Basically it is your number one job as a parent to take care of your child, go with your gut.

Jaysus, I'm not familiar with these male toilets you describe at all!

As for doctors, well some of them can be extremely small minded and prejudiced. Depends on the infection I suppose and the chances of getting it from touching an urinal, but fair enough.

As for bad language, haven't experienced it either, maybe in pubs and nightclubs, so not a concern for my son yet. If it does happen, I'm sure it wont be the first time he heard it! Maybe even heard it from girls!

zuroph

Yourself wrote: »

On a few occasions I allowed my OH to take my child into the Gents with him for the novelty until my son got a nasty infection the doctor told me was probably from touching it against the urinal, aside from bad language, Child molesters and bad habits, the Gents are filthy places for children, with or without supervision!

So only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children?

Having worked in several bars and nightclubs, and having friends who have worked in several shopping centres, cafes and restaurants, Women's bathrooms are no better than mens, and often much much worse. the old "hover" trick seems grand in theory but in reality, ye're not that accurate. seen horrific womens jacks.

Also, fair play to your doctor for being able to make such an acute diagnosis.

If he was going in with his father, he's in no fear of molesters. the bad language and habits, pretty non-existent unless you're talking about a bar late at night.

Yourself

K-9 wrote: »

Jaysus, I'm not familiar with these male toilets you describe at all!

As for doctors, well some of them can be extremely small minded and prejudiced. Depends on the infection I suppose and the chances of getting it from touching an urinal, but fair enough.

As for bad language, haven't experienced it either, maybe in pubs and nightclubs, so not a concern for my son yet. If it does happen, I'm sure it wont be the first time he heard it! Maybe even heard it from girls!

zuroph wrote: »

So only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children?

Having worked in several bars and nightclubs, and having friends who have worked in several shopping centres, cafes and restaurants, Women's bathrooms are no better than mens, and often much much worse. the old "hover" trick seems grand in theory but in reality, ye're not that accurate. seen horrific womens jacks.

Also, fair play to your doctor for being able to make such an acute diagnosis.

If he was going in with his father, he's in no fear of molesters. the bad language and habits, pretty non-existent unless you're talking about a bar late at night.

I never said only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children! My point was when your child is with you, you can protect them from certain things and address issues as they arise!

My list was echoing an earlier post.

Love the sarcastic tone by the way! :rolleyes: I was concerned for my sons health, wanting to prevent further occurrences, this is what the Doctor suggested it could be from, so I took his word for it. Just glad the doctor could sort it out, wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I haven't yet brought my son out clubbing but thanks for the heads up!

I haven't come across any of these filthy Ladies toilets in the light of day, though maybe its just the places I frequent. As for the Gents toilets, you can usually smell them before you see them.

Im not sexist, just want to keep my child safe in a vulnerable situation until he is old enough to go it alone.

K-9

Yourself wrote: »

I never said only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children! My point was when your child is with you, you can protect them from certain things and address issues as they arise!

My list was echoing an earlier post.

Love the sarcastic tone by the way! :rolleyes: I was concerned for my sons health, wanting to prevent further occurrences, this is what the Doctor suggested it could be from, so I took his word for it. Just glad the doctor could sort it out, wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I haven't yet brought my son out clubbing but thanks for the heads up!

I haven't come across any of these filthy Ladies toilets in the light of day, though maybe its just the places I frequent. As for the Gents toilets, you can usually smell them before you see them.

Im not sexist, just want to keep my child safe in a vulnerable situation until he is old enough to go it alone.

Never suggested you said that, the general tone was there in your post though.

As for the clubbing, exactly! Bad language is not a normal event in toilets in shopping centres etc. Don't know where you got that impression from or indeed filthy male toilets. What shopping centres have filthy male toilets?

What filthy ladies toilets? I never suggested that, but I would agree with Zurophs experiences in that regard. Then again, it is nightclubs and pubs, so largely irrelevant to the current discussion.

zuroph

Yourself wrote: »

I never said only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children! My point was when your child is with you, you can protect them from certain things and address issues as they arise!

I haven't yet brought my son out clubbing but thanks for the heads up!

I haven't come across any of these filthy Ladies toilets in the light of day, though maybe its just the places I frequent. As for the Gents toilets, you can usually smell them before you see them.

Im not sexist, just want to keep my child safe in a vulnerable situation until he is old enough to go it alone.

you said that your other half used to be allowed take him to the jacks, but no more, do you not trust him to supervise?

as for the gents, in a shopping centre, the mens and the womens are cleaned as often as each other, and if you can't see them, how would you know they are filthy? chances of your son touching off a urinal are lower than touching off a toilet bowl in a cubicle too btw.

you stated there is bad language, child molesters and bad habits to be found in the male toilets. I'd challenge that the exact same is equally as likely in female toilets, and, accompanied, the child would be fine in the mens. unaccompanied, he'd probably be fine too.

Yourself

K-9 wrote: »

Never suggested you said that, the general tone was there in your post though.

As for the clubbing, exactly! Bad language is not a normal event in toilets in shopping centres etc. Don't know where you got that impression from or indeed filthy male toilets. What shopping centres have filthy male toilets?

What filthy ladies toilets? I never suggested that, but I would agree with Zurophs experiences in that regard. Then again, it is nightclubs and pubs, so largely irrelevant to the current discussion.

zuroph said: "So only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children?"

I was not saying that you said it, nor was I saying it.

I think the topic is drifting here, in my own situation I'm keeping my child with me for safety reasons. I wouldn't leave him alone with a group of law abiding strangers for 5 minutes, never mind if he had his genitals in full view during that time.

Yourself

zuroph wrote: »

you said that your other half used to be allowed take him to the jacks, but no more, do you not trust him to supervise?

I'd challenge that the exact same is equally as likely in female toilets, and, accompanied, the child would be fine in the mens. unaccompanied, he'd probably be fine too.

Other half is no longer in the equation.

Probably is not good enough for me.

From what age do you think a child should go unsupervised without parental supervision?

Peppapig

I was shocked when I read this. I thought it was a joke! An EIGHT year old boy in the ladies..ffs

zuroph

Yourself wrote: »

Other half is no longer in the equation.

Probably is not good enough for me.

From what age do you think a child should go unsupervised without parental supervision?

Depends on the child, and the bathroom. Ideally, first supervised, but 8 they should be starting to get used to using the jacks themselves IMO. obviously not in every situation, but in a lot of situations , you can wait outside the door and let them go. It'll be as much a learning experience for the parent as the child.

Nevyn

It is a learning experience and which all parents will go through with thier child when thier child is capable but children differ and you can't just set a fixed age.

zuroph

Thaedydal wrote: »

It is a learning experience and which all parents will go through with thier child when thier child is capable but children differ and you can't just set a fixed age.

yes, but I think we can safely say that 11 is excessive for a healthy normal boy to need to be brought to the ladies.

Yourself

zuroph wrote: »

Depends on the child, and the bathroom. Ideally, first supervised, but 8 they should be starting to get used to using the jacks themselves IMO. obviously not in every situation, but in a lot of situations , you can wait outside the door and let them go. It'll be as much a learning experience for the parent as the child.

My child is younger, I dont feel I'm over protective

K-9

Yourself wrote: »

zuroph said: "So only men can have bad habits, curse, and molest children?"

I was not saying that you said it, nor was I saying it.

I think the topic is drifting here, in my own situation I'm keeping my child with me for safety reasons. I wouldn't leave him alone with a group of law abiding strangers for 5 minutes, never mind if he had his genitals in full view during that time.

Well of course you are entitled to your opinions but they seem to be based on incorrect assumptions about male toilets. Fair point about the strangers, but there seems to be an over fascination about urinals on threads like this.

Male toilets in shopping centres would usually have a couple of cubicles too, so they can go there as well.

Thaedydal wrote: »

It is a learning experience and which all parents will go through with thier child when thier child is capable but children differ and you can't just set a fixed age.

Indeed, the word is experience. Posters are giving their experiences and barring one or two (which I don't think, barring 1, are directly related to the OP's particular scenario), the experience in letting them go themselves is positive.

wolfpawnat

zuroph wrote: »

No there hasn't. I can say that with some authority.

http://www.braypeople.ie/premium/news/attempted-abduction-2261679.html

zuroph

wolfpawnat wrote: »

http://www.braypeople.ie/premium/news/attempted-abduction-2261679.html

vintage car/ black saloon,white van. one reported incident in the paper/ man going around trying to abduct lots of kids.

see how this is a spiralling rumour already?

wolfpawnat

zuroph wrote: »

vintage car/ black saloon,white van. one reported incident in the paper/ man going around trying to abduct lots of kids.

see how this is a spiralling rumour already?

It is not a spiralling rumour, the original article I read was on hotmail news the other day, sadly it is not available now as it is updated daily. As a mother of a child in that locality and having brought my son to the Bray seafront several times I read the news piece in great detail as I expect many other parents in the area did had they seen it!

metrovelvet

I dont think you can fix an age. For example, the son of a single parent might have little or no experience in a gents toilet before venturing in by himself. The son of parents who has experience of the gents by being accompanied by his father will be far more aware of the proticols and environment before venturing in on his own for the first time. My guess would be the latter could start younger.

zuroph

wolfpawnat wrote: »

It is not a spiralling rumour, the original article I read was on hotmail news the other day, sadly it is not available now as it is updated daily. As a mother of a child in that locality and having brought my son to the Bray seafront several times I read the news piece in great detail as I expect many other parents in the area did had they seen it!

In fact, there is newspaper reports dating back to february online. the recurring theme? not one of them has a garda source, or even alludes to sources of any type. One article even admits that it has not yet verified the rumours with the Gardaí before going to print.

My point stands, if there is child abductors all over dublin at work since february or before, the dublin children have nothing to fear, as, since no children have gone missing, they are truly the most inept bunch of abductors known to man. that, or they're very very picky.

LegacyUser

I have an 8 yr old son, and when he needs the toilet while we are out shopping, then I let him go into the Mens while I stand outside. However, if I also need to use facilities myself, then I bring him into the ladies and have him stand outside the cubicle, or by the sinks - as I am certainly not going to leave him alone in a shopping centre even for three minutes.
I'd like to know what the woman who complained about your son expected you to do with him if this was the case.

K-9

zuroph wrote: »

In fact, there is newspaper reports dating back to february online. the recurring theme? not one of them has a garda source, or even alludes to sources of any type. One article even admits that it has not yet verified the rumours with the Gardaí before going to print.

My point stands, if there is child abductors all over dublin at work since february or before, the dublin children have nothing to fear, as, since no children have gone missing, they are truly the most inept bunch of abductors known to man. that, or they're very very picky.

Which kind of goes back to the point raised earlier, they should be aware of the risks anyway, media reports or not.

metrovelvet

Have any children gone missing?

From some basic googling it seems the child abductions in Ireland are related to custody disputes and Hague convention violations.

zuroph

Problem is, no doubt some of these rumours occur because parent's are scaring their children with warnings. You tell a kid, "be careful of strangers in cars", then some guy stops near a kid and the tale is woven.

LegacyUser

zuroph wrote: »

Problem is, no doubt some of these rumours occur because parent's are scaring their children with warnings. You tell a kid, "be careful of strangers in cars", then some guy stops near a kid and the tale is woven.

Why have you continued to insist that the world (or dublin in this instance) is full of over protective mothers who due to some exaggerated media articles, are all scare mongering, and have our kids terrified into believing that strangers could possibly be dangerous?

Should we not tell our children to be wary of strangers?

I am very confused by your replies.
Do you have children? I assume you don't, not that it should be relevant, but in this instance you have been berating anyone and everyone who has said they would prefer to keep their children informed on ways to keep safe. You have even made a mockery of the 'supposed' abductors in Dublin. And I don't understand why you would do this?

zuroph

Unregistered wrote: »

Why have you continued to insist that the world (or dublin in this instance) is full of over protective mothers who due to some exaggerated media articles, are all scare mongering, and have our kids terrified into believing that strangers could possibly be dangerous?

Should we not tell our children to be wary of strangers?

I am very confused by your replies.
Do you have children? I assume you don't, not that it should be relevant, but in this instance you have been berating anyone and everyone who has said they would prefer to keep their children informed on ways to keep safe. You have even made a mockery of the 'supposed' abductors in Dublin. And I don't understand why you would do this?

I do it because it was spiralling out of control, people were insisting their local gardaí were doing nothing, complaining that their principals should be fired for not sending out warning letters, all for a scare that never existed.

There is nothing wrong with parents teaching their kids to be vigilant. There is something terribly wrong with not even letting the kids be afforded the chance to be vigilant; locking them indoors, not letting them out to play, not letting them use the bathroom by themselves at the age of 11. There is also something terribly wrong with pointing the finger at every man who looks twice at a child and shouting "pervert!".

Nevyn

Can we please not drag this thread off topic by bringing other thread into it.