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Masturbation?

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12467

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    #92
    Banned Account
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,553 ✭✭✭Banned Account


    Penny White Logging wrote: »
    'Heavy weight Belly Button Boxing Champion of the World' here!.

    x2 per day.

    Meh, I'd challenge you if it wasn't so homoerotic.


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    #93
    Kasabian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,689 ✭✭✭Kasabian


    questionmark? wrote: »
    you need help try this guy http://bajan.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/gun.jpg


    I have one, Thanks anyway.


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    #94
    Fizman
    Registered Users Posts: 6,605 ✭✭✭Fizman


    Masturbation makes Baby Jesus cry.


    /Baby Jesus being one of many names for my penis.


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    #95
    Banned Account
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,553 ✭✭✭Banned Account


    Fizman wrote: »
    /Baby Jesus being one of many names for my penis.

    Mine is more like Lazarus;)

























    I hope that wink wasn't homoerotic:(


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    #96
    W.Shakes-Beer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,975 ✭✭✭W.Shakes-Beer


    mines Mister Round-Tree :D


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    #97
    Sanjuro
    Registered Users Posts: 4,236 ✭✭✭Sanjuro


    We (well my ma. I don't live at home any more) have these neighbours who live across the road. The husband and wife are real weirdos. They dress like they live in 1950's suburban America. He sits on his doorstep every Halloween with a cricket-bat. And once he went around the street trying to get his neighbours to sign a petition to stop his neighbour from sunbathing topless in her own back garden. The weird couple even turned up to my father's funeral and sat up front despite never having spoken to either of my parents.

    Anyway, my mam's friend lives back-to-back with this strange couple and their four sons, whome we've never seen speak and used to scuttle back to the house every time somebody spoke to them in the street. The kids were real shut-ins and very strange boys. Anyway, one night my mam's friend was in the one of the back rooms of her house. And she happened to look into her neighbour's garden. She says the parents must have been away because she saw into the living room and saw the oldest of the boys standing right in the middle of the room, bollock naked, bathed in blue light, going hell for leather on himself. My mam's friend said it was one of the weirdest things she's ever seen.

    Not sure if she consigned the image to the ****-bank.


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    #98
    VinnyTGM
    Registered Users Posts: 827 ✭✭✭VinnyTGM


    Regular **** is meant to be good for your prostate gland, and helps prevent cancer on it. Thats my excuse anyway.


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    #99
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    mink_man wrote: »
    well bo selecta said the **** wall was 7, that would be hard enough reach!
    Speak for yourself... :cool:
    Kasabian wrote: »
    I had to Google clitoris :eek: :pac::pac:
    Search for clitoris? Nothing new there... :pac:


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    #100
    FlutterinBantam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,575 ✭✭✭✭FlutterinBantam


    Hmmmm

    Fond of playing the pink oboe I see:cool:


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    #101
    Yourself
    Registered Users Posts: 341 ✭✭Yourself


    blueser wrote: »
    That one's been doing the rounds since Noah was giving sea trials to the ark! The original version has our hero listening to music on his headphones with his eyes shut while he was pulling the pud. When he had 'finished', he saw a cup of coffee on his bedside table. And his mother was the only other person in the house!!

    Must have been a ghost! :eek:

    send this on 6 billion times or you will be friendless and learn that nobody loves you :rolleyes:





    ps hands up who's at it reading this thread!?


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    #102
    W.Shakes-Beer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,975 ✭✭✭W.Shakes-Beer


    Yourself wrote: »
    Must have been a ghost! :eek:

    send this on 6 billion times or you will be friendless and learn that nobody loves you :rolleyes:





    ps hands up who's at it reading this thread!?

    Are you trying to seduce me Mrs. Robinson?


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    #103
    Yourself
    Registered Users Posts: 341 ✭✭Yourself


    Dudess wrote: »
    Speak for yourself... :cool:
    I dont need anyone to speak for me, thanks


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    #104
    Yourself
    Registered Users Posts: 341 ✭✭Yourself


    W.Shakes-Beer wrote: »
    Are you trying to seduce me Mrs. Robinson?

    Apologies... but I'm all out of batteries!


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    #105
    Faith+1
    Registered Users Posts: 3,674 ✭✭✭Faith+1


    I'm using a walking stick now!:(


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    #106
    bytey
    Closed Accounts Posts: 266 ✭✭bytey


    caseyann wrote: »
    Its a sin :mad:

    AAAA- HA HA HA HAH AH HA HA HAH AH

    * fap fap fap fap fap fap

    im thinking of you by the way

    fap fa pfappity fap fap FAP FAP FAP *


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    #107
    Degag
    Registered Users Posts: 9,970 ✭✭✭Degag


    K4t wrote: »
    Majority of lads I know have a w**k (or two) every day.

    Differs with girls or so they say: One girl told me that her and her friends rarely if ever do it. Another said her and her friends do but just not at the same rate (dunno if she was referring to speed!) as lads.

    Never understood how the term w**ker is deemed to be offensive either. I just smile and pretend to **** (or actually do ****) when someone calls me it.

    Take what you will from that.:D

    I don't understand this. My friends (both close and casual) and I never discuss this, nor would even dream of discussing personal **** habits it think... is this normal?:confused:
    bluto63 wrote: »
    I know someone who heard that if you sniff poppers just as your coming
    At the risk of sounding pretty stupid... what are poppers?


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    #108
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poppers


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    #109
    NoHornJan
    Registered Users Posts: 553 ✭✭✭NoHornJan


    One has to be very careful nowadays, masturbating while using a vibrator and watching erotica on one's laptop can result in one waking up dead in the morning, with a pussy on one's chest and one's name plastered all over the tabloids


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    #110
    Tar.Aldarion
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,092 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tar.Aldarion


    have to, a lot. It changes my personality a lot if I don't. Mmmm relaxing

    I was told it was a sin in school, I took the piss out of the nun until I got everybody kicked out, oh well.


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    #111
    alwaysadub
    Registered Users Posts: 11,554 ✭✭✭✭alwaysadub


    Faith+1 wrote: »
    I'm using a walking stick now!:(

    Well, whatever turns ya on i suppose. Don't get splinters!! :eek:
    :pac:


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    #112
    I_AmThe_Walrus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 355 ✭✭I_AmThe_Walrus


    I think it's a natural thing, particularly when you're not getting your bit... :pac:

    What sites would you recommend?


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    #113
    magicianz
    Registered Users Posts: 1,115 ✭✭✭magicianz


    I say go onto bebo and read your mail! Always some webcam spam there :D


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    #114
    I_AmThe_Walrus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 355 ✭✭I_AmThe_Walrus


    magicianz wrote: »
    I say go onto bebo and read your mail! Always some webcam spam there :D

    I don't have a Bebo...I thought that stuff was for children..


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    #115
    magicianz
    Registered Users Posts: 1,115 ✭✭✭magicianz


    Yeah I had one as a kid :D it's that old now :S go google omegle, you'll find someone eventually :D


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    #116
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    Here's a conundrum... if **** makes you go blind & carrots help you see better - what happens if you only **** when you have a carrot stuck up your arse?


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    #117
    Tar.Aldarion
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,092 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tar.Aldarion


    Are you eating the carrot after?


    Truly, a scenario worth investigating on mythbusters, finally.


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    #118
    Killer Wench
    Registered Users Posts: 2,386 ✭✭✭Killer Wench


    I freely acknowledge that I have very bad, horrible eye sight.

    :D


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    #119
    epgc3fyqirnbsx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,228 ✭✭✭epgc3fyqirnbsx


    It's that time of night again anyway, I'm going up to ride my hand


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    #120
    Seloth
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,039 ✭✭✭Seloth


    did anyone else notice the lack of likes at the start of this thread :D


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    #121
    Motley Crue
    Registered Users Posts: 6,382 ✭✭✭Motley Crue


    questionmark? wrote: »
    I'll hold my sticky hand up folks:pac: and say every now and then i may have knocked one out. Now saying that it is very rare mainly because i happen to live with herself and my ahem... needs are usually meet.

    I remember my Dad once trying to have a conversation with me about Masturbation, and saying to me something like "I know a lot of single men like to Masturbate, but in this house...."

    I think you've hit the nail on the head, if you're in a sexual relationship with frequent sex then there's no real need


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