Online Dating

That_Guy

2 Miles From Narnia wrote: »

I'm on match, and keep getting winks from guys whose profiles are in other languages. :eek:

Reply back in Irish.

2 Miles From Narnia

That_Guy wrote: »

Reply back in Irish.

How about (with the help of my dusty leaving cert books..... or Google translate)

Lovely to hear from you! I'm a millionaire playbunny looking for a short marraige with no prenup. Write back soon! xxxxx

tHE vAGGABOND

Just discovered this thread when thinking about this very subject myself, over 5000 posts! I think Tom and the boards lads need to ditch adverts and deals and start dating.boards.ie

Until that day, time to take the plunge again, after a terrible online dating experience when I was in London, and not really doing it since.

Autosport

I seem to attract foreign men who want me to look after them :rolleyes: i give up

That_Guy

Autosport wrote: »

I seem to attract foreign men who want me to look after them :rolleyes: i give up

I don't know why, but I pictured a middle Eastern man in a nappy and a bottle with a caption above his profile picture saying, "Look after me"

Autosport

That_Guy wrote: »

I don't know why, but I pictured a middle Eastern man in a nappy and a bottle with a caption above his profile picture saying, "Look after me"

That made me laugh But I aint gonna be no ones mammy and i aint no bank :rolleyes:

ahal

Hi all,

I joined Anotherfriend.com ages ago and a half Nigerian girl sends me a wink. We got chatting (messages back and forth) and she goes "maybe I'll risk sending you my number". I took this to mean that she wasn't a paid member (which would result in her getting barred from the site), so I joined up only to then find that she IS then a paid member. She initially contacted me about 6 months ago but I'd been banned from the site for a while before all of this. In fact I'd never replied to her winks because I thought I was still banned even when it expired.

Anyways, this past week it's all grand then she starts questioning the age of my photos. FFS the pic I have on there is about a year old, and I'm sure I've not aged that much in the interim, but she tells me basically to have a nice life and blocks me. Whatever else, if this is the 'norm' it seems to me that she's making a lot of money for the people who run Anotherfriend.com!

stargazer 68

Larianne wrote: »

No word from Dovies.

Im here!! Far too hungover yesterday to be able to type!
Date report - really cute (much better in the flesh than his pics). What I thought was going to be a couple of drinks and home turned into a 'still out at 2am thing!! Really chatty and wants to see me again! Woohoo

So if and when that happens all well and good. And no I wasn't suffering from sexual exhaustion yesterday - thanks Gatecrash - but he is a great kisser (Im such a tart) :eek:

cyrusdvirus

Dovies wrote: »

Im here!! Far too hungover yesterday to be able to type!
Date report - really cute (much better in the flesh than his pics). What I thought was going to be a couple of drinks and home turned into a 'still out at 2am thing!! Really chatty and wants to see me again! Woohoo

So if and when that happens all well and good. And no I wasn't suffering from sexual exhaustion yesterday - thanks Gatecrash - but he is a great kisser (Im such a tart) :eek:

WOOHOOO!!!!

2 success stories!!

Way to go you!!

bobbles87

Wow, I googled this and from the ladies lounge I found this form, ovef 5,000 posts - this is a hot topic

Soooo after chatting randomly to a friend of a friend on a nite out, she was telling me about online dating. TBH I thought there was always a stigma attached to using these sites but this girl made me see sense and to give it a shot. So I did for a week.

I set up an account on POF and granted there were some emails of the perverted form, there were some decent guys aswell. Im als up for the craic and I love going out but it is very difficult to meet someone in a club who usually is only looking for birds that are 'fair game'..

So after a week, and exchaging emails with one guy all week, we decided to add each other on fb...and from there on skype, he asked for my no as well, which I did give out after a week :P. Now weeks on, I chat to him almost every 2nd nite, he nearly always emails me 1st via skype, fb or txt. Its grand and we seem to get on well, theres als a bit of banter.

Thing is I actually havent spoken to him and I dropped hints last nite, which he casually brushed off...Im thinkin its a waste of both of our time if we dont actually speak or meet in person.

May be he is just after a pen pal, but Im not, and dont get me wrong, I dont want anything serious, just someone to go on the odd date with, but not a classified **** buddy either, im not really like that.

What do you guys think? Im not stupid and Im guessing he is just wasting my time...how can I get a straight answer without coming on too strong or seeming desperate ???

Any advice will do.....Im new to this online dating scene, and quite a few of you seem to be having successes

Thanks!

stargazer 68

Well bobbles you meet all sorts online believe me!

But I would be the type to say, by now, well when are you taking me out for a beer?? Be direct and see what happens - if he fobs you off then you have your answer - you are in the friend zone!

xxdilemmaxx

Quick question, just joined OKC after being in a 7 yr relationship so outta the game quite a while

Just wondering if you guys reply to people even if you're not interested, gotten a few long/personalised/nice emails off people I just amn't attracted to. Is it better to ignore or reply to say I am not interested? Eek!

cyrusdvirus

xxdilemmaxx wrote: »

Quick question, just joined OKC after being in a 7 yr relationship so outta the game quite a while

Just wondering if you guys reply to people even if you're not interested, gotten a few long/personalised/nice emails off people I just amn't attracted to. Is it better to ignore or reply to say I am not interested? Eek!

This is one that comes up here regularly enough. I'm in the camp of if someone has gone to the effort of doing up a mail, that doesn't look like a copy and paste job, then do them the courtesy of a response, even if it is a You seem nice, just not what I'm looking for mail

There are others who go with the don't respond you will only encourage the real saddos to try and change your mind option.

Both are valid and i really don't think there is any one, cover all options blanket rule.
'
personally i prefer a 'thanks but no thanks mail', because I DO put a bit of effort into my mails.

stargazer 68

xxdilemmaxx wrote: »

Just wondering if you guys reply to people even if you're not interested, gotten a few long/personalised/nice emails off people I just amn't attracted to. Is it better to ignore or reply to say I am not interested? Eek!

Ooh the million dollar online dating question. General consensus is to reply with thanks but I dont think we are compatible, good luck in your search type of email. But then that can bring on - stuck up bi*ch emails etc or okay no problem ones. I tend to find if you reply with a chatty email too the conversation continues and then they ask you out - thats harder to reject than the original one.

ecoli

Would agree with Dovie on this one. There could be a hundred different reasons why a guy doesn't instigate a meet up first off.

Some guys are on these sites because they are not comfortable making the first move (which could make sense if they are trying online dating as an alternative to meeting people in a more traditional sense

Some don'y wanna seem to eager. Given the amount of weirdo's who bombard girls with mails they want to almost 'prove' there are not only after one thing and as such come across as not interested in more (which more than often they are)

Some are genuinely just looking to talk to new people and as such aren't looking to meet up on dates

Some can be a little fearful of not living up to their picture in person.

There are many reasons why a guy doesnt make the first move and it doesn't always mean that they are not interested. Be upfront and direct about these things. Worst case they aren't interested and atleast you know where you stand

Anyone

xxdilemmaxx wrote: »

Just wondering if you guys reply to people even if you're not interested, gotten a few long/personalised/nice emails off people I just amn't attracted to. Is it better to ignore or reply to say I am not interested? Eek!

Cant speak for everyone, but I appreciate a mail back even to say thanks but no thanks(not those words) when I send someone a mail I put a bit of effort into writing. But that's just me.

ecoli

Anyone wrote: »

Cant speak for everyone, but I appreciate a mail back even to say thanks but no thanks(not those words) when I send someone a mail I put a bit of effort into writing. But that's just me.

+1 on this

Can find it really discouraging if you get constant silence from people. Atleast a quick mail just to acknowledge they read it and arent interest is better than nothing (again just my perspective)

Larianne

Well I got a "no dice" mail off a guy before and to be honest, I prefer the silence...

bobbles87 - if you've been mailing away and texting/skyping whatever for a while now and he hasn't asked you out then I don't think he will. Is there a reason why you haven't asked him out?? Some guys are just on those sites for the chats I think, so if that's not what you're after then wish him well. You are just wasting your time.

oh, and go Dovies!!

bobbles87

ecoli wrote: »

Would agree with Dovie on this one. There could be a hundred different reasons why a guy doesn't instigate a meet up first off.

Some guys are on these sites because they are not comfortable making the first move (which could make sense if they are trying online dating as an alternative to meeting people in a more traditional sense

Some don'y wanna seem to eager. Given the amount of weirdo's who bombard girls with mails they want to almost 'prove' there are not only after one thing and as such come across as not interested in more (which more than often they are)

Some are genuinely just looking to talk to new people and as such aren't looking to meet up on dates

Some can be a little fearful of not living up to their picture in person.

There are many reasons why a guy doesnt make the first move and it doesn't always mean that they are not interested. Be upfront and direct about these things. Worst case they aren't interested and atleast you know where you stand

Thanks for this, its a difficult one...its funny cos other guys that I spoke to online were very forward and after a few mails they were suggesting a meet up but i was like woooahh too soon and the one that I would have the most interest in wont instigate it!! Typical! This guy is relatively good looking and we seem to have the craic online neway, I just hope this isnt something to feed his ego.....Im sure plenty of that goes on from POF! He is only 23 as well so may be its an immaturity thing, just finishing up in college, hmmmm i donno. Suppose its the 21st century, time to bite the bullet and just put a suggestion out there :L

stargazer 68

23?? Ah bobbles hes only a baby fishie - throw him back!
Go on bite the bullet and ask him out for a drink - you have nothing to lose!

ecoli

Dovies wrote: »

23?? Ah bobbles hes only a baby fishie - throw him back! Go on bite the bullet and ask him out for a drink - you have nothing to lose!

Don't be ageist nothing wrong with young blood (to an extent)

bobbles87

Larianne wrote: »

Well I got a "no dice" mail off a guy before and to be honest, I prefer the silence...

bobbles87 - if you've been mailing away and texting/skyping whatever for a while now and he hasn't asked you out then I don't think he will. Is there a reason why you haven't asked him out?? Some guys are just on those sites for the chats I think, so if that's not what you're after then wish him well. You are just wasting your time.

oh, and go Dovies!!

Hi Larianne,

Ya I think I am just wasting my time here, I have dropped hints like 'will I ever get to put a voice to the face then?' ...to which he replied 'course yeah'...and then went on about something else, that was last nite and tbh I think its in black and white right there! We've been chatting on and off over the past 2 weeks, It went from emailing on POF bout 4 weeks ago to him adding me on fb then we didnt chat for 2 weeks and from there we just started chattng on fb one eve, after a few eves he asked to add me on skype and then last week he asked for my number.

I have dropped other hints and he hasnt risen to the occassion, unless I just come straight out with it? again i donno what hes after, but I aint interested in a pen pal:p!!!! There certainly would be less work in a club!!

Thanks for the feedback

bobbles87

Ha ha fishie baby Lol love it....

Well I am 24 and I dont tend to go for younger guys probs for this reason, right I will just spell it out when Im talkin to him again, couldnt be arsed with these time wasters

Larianne

Just ask him out! If he says no or makes some bullshít excuse, forget about him. At least you won't be wasting your energy and time wondering if he does or doesn't like you.

You ain't on the site to make penpals right?

stargazer 68

bobbles87 wrote: »

Ha ha fishie baby Lol love it....

Well I am 24 and I dont tend to go for younger guys probs for this reason, right I will just spell it out when Im talkin to him again, couldnt be arsed with these time wasters

You do realise, now that you are in the thread and have received our very valuable input to your love life, that you have to come back and tell us what happened!!

ecoli

bobbles87 wrote: »

I have dropped other hints and he hasnt risen to the occassion, unless I just come straight out with it? again i donno what hes after, but I aint interested in a pen pal:p!!!! There certainly would be less work in a club!!

Thanks for the feedback

Us guys arent always the smartest tools in the shed (moi being the obvious exception of course:p) Sometimes you just need to spell it out.
Not a bad idea in one the previous posts of "so when you taking me out for a drink" or something jokingly like that. Try to be flirty with it rather than intimidating but at the same time be direct so he has no wiggle room to avoid the question. That way you will have an answer one way or another and can get on with things either way from the answer.

Odaise Gaelach

"Some fellows you have to hit with a brick to get their attention. Some you have to hit with a BIG brick."
-- Delia Koudelka, 'Memory'

bobbles87

Oh gawwwd!!! He defo doesnt seem too shy, altho...txts and emails are great to hide behind! I will give it a shot, at least he was still interested after adding me on fb and seeing all my messy fotos!! ha ha...I will defo let yas know what happens.

I may need to get myself back on POF ASAP! I really dont know why there is such a stigma attached to the sites, I was having great banter emailing relatively normal people!! a few weirdos aside!
Here reading some of yer funny stories I could be adding to the disaster list soon

Justask

All the loolaa's are out in force today....some VERY odd mail :eek:

cyrusdvirus

Justask wrote: »

All the loolaa's are out in force today....some VERY odd mail :eek:

Thankfully the sites are blocked in work.... I plead innocence m'lud