Online Dating

cantdecide

Galvasean wrote: »

So... coffee? :cool:

Oh my

Any port in a storm and all that!

Galvasean

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

im just asking i dont understand how a guy can have 17 dates ? yet get no were with any of them, genuinely curious

I said I went on 17 dates?

I was bitchin'/moanin' about nobody replying to my mails on dating sites....

Snowie

Galvasean wrote: »

I said I went on 17 dates?

I was bitchin'/moanin' about nobody replying to my mails on dating sites....

throw up a typical mail youve said to a chick... see what your saying....:)

Galvasean

Hmmm.... Is that such a good idea? Ireland is a small place...

LegacyUser

Galvasean wrote: »

I am serious man.
I write serious message.
I make serious reference to what is written in profile.
I are seriously ignored. :mad:

Feh, i used to get annoyed every time I read a woman's tale of woe on this thread, about all the weirdos she met up with. I used to think, "How come those dickheads are getting all the dates? Why am I being overlooked in favour of obvious weirdos??"
Now I just chuckle to myself. Your loss ladies! :pac:
That probably makes me a bad person. Oh well.

I always always replied to someone who made an effort in messaging me. Even if just to say thanks but not this time. I ignored the one line messages, almost without exception.

But then you wouldnt have messaged me in the first place cos I had no profile pic up!

I'm taken now anyway, met him on OKC.

Bottle_of_Smoke

Logged into it last night. sent a message but got no reply. Though I did get a message from another girl. Thing is I just don't fancy her at all. Wondering should I reply at all or would that be leading her on. And telling her the truth may be unneccesary.... so ignore or tell her I'm not interested?

Snowie

Galvasean wrote: »

Hmmm.... Is that such a good idea? Ireland is a small place...

thatsa very good point... intirely up to you....
I just thought it might be a good way to see what your saying in your mails

are they long mails short mails

flirty funny? or are they funny to you?
what are you useing as your subject...
are you saying you like the pics yada yada yada

mood

Messi2 maybe you should have set up a fake male profile as well to compare. I'm sure it would have got loads of views but like in the real world (rightly or wrongly) I think it is generally expected that the guy should make the first move. A male friend of mine who tried internet dating said girls would view his profile but not initiate contact.

AnnyHallsal

mood wrote: »

A male friend of mine who tried internet dating said girls would view his profile but not initiate contact.

I think girls/women should initiate contact if they like a profile. I certainly did. It feels too contrived to sit a-waiting

Each to their own, I suppose.

Galvasean

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

throw up a typical mail youve said to a chick... see what your saying....:)

Very well. I shall throw up a vague template of a message I recently sent (editing out specifics to protect the innocent). The actual message was more conversational (ie: not bullet points)

- Pointed out similar degree.
- compliment appearance (in this case hair), nothing sleazy
- Point out similar taste in film, ask question about said films.
- Point out similar taste in TV.
- Sign off saying profile was very cool.

Most of my mails are something like this. Just referencing what's in their profile (apparently that's the key to getting replies :rolleyes:). Ask a simple question or two and throw in a bit of a compliment. Not particularly long, but not too snappy/vague.

the_syco

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

I think girls/women should initiate contact if they like a profile. I certainly did. It feels too contrived to sit a-waiting

Each to their own, I suppose.

A few women have contacted me on OKCupid, but I'd have nothing in common with them. I seem to attract only the big ladys, though

Galvasean

I've never had a woman instigate contact with me on OKcupid. Get the odd one on CS, but they're always older than my mother and she remembers the dinosaurs

The_Morrigan

Galvasean wrote: »

I've never had a woman instigate contact with me on OKcupid. Get the odd one on CS, but they're always older than my mother and she remembers the dinosaurs

I've contacted guys on OKC - only two have every replied
So its not just the guys that don't get responses from the girls!

Snowie

Galvasean wrote: »

Very well. I shall throw up a vague template of a message I recently sent (editing out specifics to protect the innocent). The actual message was more conversational (ie: not bullet points)



Most of my mails are something like this. Just referencing what's in their profile (apparently that's the key to getting replies :rolleyes:). Ask a simple question or two and throw in a bit of a compliment. Not particularly long, but not too snappy/vague.

please don't take this personal but you sound like a scintist, dude you sound intelgent and well some people take that as a bit boring ....

Dude serously lighten up, dont be so rigid dont talk at them talk to them dont talk about degrees pull the pisss out of them be cheeky live a little sure if your mails arnt working rework them, to the woman read what she says not what she does.... who the hell wants to talk about there job on a dating site....

be fun ...

AnnyHallsal

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

please don't take this personal but you sound like a scintist, dude you sound intelgent and well some people take that as a bit boring ....

Dude serously lighten up, dont be so rigid dont talk at them talk to them dont talk about degrees pull the pisss out of them be cheeky live a little sure if your mails arnt working rework them, to the woman read what she says not what she does.... who the hell wants to talk about there job on a dating site....

be fun ...

Erm, just to counterbalance this, intelligence is a very attractive trait, so don't dumb down either Sean (obviously I know you wouldn't!). Continue to play to your demographic

Patience, no expectations, not taking things personally ... that's all I'd advise ... not very useful that

Snowie

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

Erm, just to counterbalance this, intelligence is a very attractive trait, so don't dumb down either Sean (obviously I know you wouldn't!). Continue to play to your demographic

Patience, no expectations, not taking things personally ... that's all I'd advise ... not very useful that

theres a difference between dumbing it down and having fun and a bit of zest its a fine ballance

i think personality is important..... :cool:

mood

I don't see anything wrong with your example of a e-mail Snow-Monkey. I'm female and would reply to a e-mail like that if the guy had a photo and I thought I might fancy him in person and if what we are looking for match (age bracket etc). Maybe try a different site.

AnnyHallsal

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

theres a difference between dumbing it down and having fun and a bit of zest its a fine ballance

i think personality is important..... :cool:

Sure, but intelligence and personality aren't mutually exclusive :P

Snowie

mood wrote: »

I don't see anything wrong with your example of a e-mail Snow-Monkey. I'm female and would reply to a e-mail like that if the guy had a photo and I thought I might fancy him in person and if what we are looking for match (age bracket etc). Maybe try a different site.

thank you

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

Sure, but intelligence and personality aren't mutually exclusive :P

Yeah ya see your looking at it from what you think, not what a woman will find attractive, while yes intelgence is an important factor for most people.....

There's over doing it bring to many things to talk about unless you have the ability to keep the girl interested i.e attraction

I beleave just keeping it relaxed cool and funny. There's plenty of time for conversation thast a long way away you first as man gotta stand out of the crowd because some women receave up to a 100 mails a day....

Anny its ok for you to say your a girl youve never had to woo a lady.....

mood

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

some women receave up to a 100 mails a day....

But once they exclude guys they wouldn't be interested in (age/location/smoker/non-smoker/etc) the amount of e-mails that might lead to something greatly decreases.

Galvasean

I don't think asking a girl which Disney film she likes best is being overly-intellectual..
Bear in mind I phrase my mails a lot differently (was bullet pointing here for the sake of simpplicity and anomnity - im not actually a robot) and yes, I do throw in jokes too.
Just didn't wanna copy n' paste a recent mail in case someone who recieved said mail posts on boards.

edit: Lemme clarify; I dont simply go "*Bzzt* Similar taste in film noticed. Compatibility assumed. *Bzzz*"
I pick up on similar interests and try start a conversation about them.

Snowie

mood wrote: »

But once they exclude guys they wouldn't be interested in (age/location/smoker/non-smoker/etc) the amount of e-mails that might lead to something greatly decreases.

so let me get this straight youd sit there four two hours going threw mails you got on a dating website ?

thats a serious chunk of time out of your day....

Snowie

Galvasean wrote: »

I don't think asking a girl which Disney film she likes best is being overly-intellectual..

its lame tho, it makes me wanna puke... sorry man being honest here not trying to make you sound bad hear.. every time you right a mail to a girl ask your self what would ari gold say and then tone it down bye about 100% :pac:...

what do you do for fun ?


me i play air base guitar with jamerqui and im even better then the base player why because its escapisim and fun

are you getting what im saying ?

mood

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

so let me get this straight youd sit there four two hours going threw mails you got on a dating website ?

thats a serious chunk of time out of your day....

No. I never said that. Where the hell did 4/2 hours come from

At a glance I know I'm not going to want to date an 60 year old man so don't even read such e-mails. And I don't read e-mails form guys with no photo etc. It doesn't take that much time.

And I've only got about 10 - 20 e-mails a day because I use a paid site so there are less people on it and one girl here who said she gets 100 e-mails a day is on 3 sites so obviously get tripple the amount of e-mails most people would get!!!

mood

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

its lame tho, it makes me wanna puke...

But your not a girl!

Snowie

mood wrote: »

No. I never said that. Where the hell did 4/2 hours come from

At a glance I know I'm not going to want to date an 60 year old man so don't even read such e-mails. And I don't read e-mails form guys with no photo etc. It doesn't take that much time.

And I've only got about 10 - 20 e-mails a day because I use a paid site so there are less people on it and one girl here who said she gets 100 e-mails a day is on 3 sites so obviously get tripple the amount of e-mails most people would get!!!

so let me get this straight you use a pay site fair enough, but with less users you receeave less mails.... But your happy with how it goes... thats fair enough... But there completely different circumstances..

Seans using a free site there for more male members and the like hood that a girls gonna receave more mails which means theres more of need to stand out.. In a positive way. (hell thats a lot of mores :pac:

<snip>

mood

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

so let me get this straight you use a pay site fair enough, but with less users you receeave less mails.... But your happy with how it goes... thats fair enough... But there completely different circumstances..

Seans using a free site there for more male members and the like hood that a girls gonna receave more mails which means theres more of need to stand out.. In a positive way. (hell thats a lot of mores :pac:


So I dont see how you'd know more about the subject. I don't mean to be sexist but women are none for not giving good woman advice to men and that's a fact.

Fact! Really! Sounds more like your opinion to me! It's up to Snow-Monkey who's advice who wants to take, if any.

From my personal experience the guys who are full of jokes and don't try to chat properly are just time wasters. The ones who try to have a proper conversation are the one I prefer to get e-mails form and the ones I went on to meet in person.

PS I never said I know more about internet dating. I just am giving my opinion for personal experience just like other people. Surely I'm entitled to that!

AnnyHallsal

There are different kinds of guys, different kinds of girls.

None of that Ari Gold bulls%*t would work on me and I would find the Disney question adorable. That's what I meant by demographics. You can't please all the people all the time.

Snowie

mood wrote: »

From my personal experience the guys who are full of jokes and don't try to chat properly are just time wasters. The ones who try to have a proper conversation are the one I prefer to get e-mails form and the ones I went on to meet in person.

if you'le notice i said that.
would you agree that what im saying is a better approach....:)

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

thank you


I beleave just keeping it relaxed cool and funny. There's plenty of time for conversation thast a long way away you first as man gotta stand out of the crowd because some women receave up to a 100 mails a day....

mood

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

There are different kinds of guys, different kinds of girls.

None of that Ari Gold bulls%*t would work on me and I would find the Disney question adorable. That's what I meant by demographics. You can't please all the people all the time.

Possible a stupid question but what is Ari Gold bulls%*t?