Online Dating

Marcus_Crassus

If you feel that you like the person sufficiently, then I say meet up with them asap. Exchanging emails is not really the way to feel out someone's character, but it can help you suss them out a bit.

So yeah if you feel like there is something there, meeting up quickly is imperative IMO. No point in dragging it out with back-and-forth responses.

Ophiopogon

No but thats what I don't want. I don't want to meet up asap I jsut want to chat first but it has not gone down well if I say it to someone. I think they think I'm stringing them along.

LollieB

So I'm back on the OKC horse and have a date next week with a new guy, whilst being in contact with two others.

The guy I was previously dating has suddenly decided to ignore me despite us spending a great weekend together! But, as put out as I was at first, I'm not too upset over it. I liked him & was a little disappointed but I'm glad I had a good experience with online dating- two months of meeting someone new and having fun dates has given me renewed hope!

I'm surprised at how much interest I've had on the site- believe me, I'm not the hottest thing out there, but it has boosted my self confidence a bit. I've no qualms about emailing guys first & going on a date with a stranger is hard but fun at the same time. There are still a lot of great guys out there, it just takes longer for me to find them!

phoenix833

So my experience so far....

I didn't realise how important it was at first but having a great headline and "about me" section is paramount. Initially I had an "About Me" section which was funny in my opinion but when I read back over it I was trying too hard be funny. I was getting a few responses so wasn't too caught up on it.

However I re-wrote it in a conversational style and to give an honest account of myself and it's when you try do that your true personality comes through. It was honest but managed to be funny as well without trying to force the opinion onto whoever was looking at it.

Since I changed it I've had 8 first contact emails in just over a day!! I didn't get that many in the first month I was on it. All of them saying "great profile" "you're funny" "you seem really interesting".

So if I can give any advice to anybody starting out is do not underestimate how important the headline is, something short and unique that will catch the attention.

Captain Havoc

Meanwhile in Kilkenny and surrounds:

Xios

After a lovely conversation with the biker girl. She proceeded to delete her account

Guys, are there any resources online that'll give me good tips on what to say, what not to say, how to phrase things etc. Cause what i'm doing obviously ain't working, with 2 months and ZERO dates, somethings wrong

liz2

Xios wrote: »

After a lovely conversation with the biker girl. She proceeded to delete her account

Guys, are there any resources online that'll give me good tips on what to say, what not to say, how to phrase things etc. Cause what i'm doing obviously ain't working, with 2 months and ZERO dates, somethings wrong

Just be yourself, really
it takes time to click with the right person. its not anything you're doing wrong.
i was on pof on and off for about a year (with a few dates here and there) and it was only recently that i found someone i really clicked with.

Good luck

RonMexico

Captain Havoc wrote: »

Meanwhile in Kilkenny and surrounds:

Add Limerick to that. Everyone is in either Dublin, Cork or Galway.

KTRIC

Back on OKC the day after i dumped my gf i met on the same site. I'm thinking 3rd time lucky with the site and hopefully find someone that doesn't have more issues than me.

Howard the Duck

Well had a date during the week with a girl that messaged me first. It went well i am very attracted to her and i didn't even snot all over myself this time!
Planning to meet up again during the week so i'll see how it goes but so far so good

Lon Dubh

Right, went on a date. The guy is nice, no red flags, seems to be who he said he was, some similar interests between us, BUT (oh god why does there have to be but ) I can't see myself dating him. There was nothing at all wrong with him, but I just couldn't picture us together. He was a bit different personality-wise than what I was expecting (in spite of my efforts not to build up a picture of him before meeting).

Did anyone find doing internet dating that they felt like this initially (like that there was no chemistry/spark), but once they got to know the person a bit better they changed their minds? I am a bit of a slow burner, though I don't think that is the issue this time.

I might meet him one more time if he is interested just to see how it goes (I actually keep hoping he won't want to meet up again so I can avoid dealing with it, which is probably a very bad sign!). Maybe if I met him again and got to know more of him that I might see something in him that would attract me? Though on the other hand I might just be kidding myself. Unfortunately he lives much further away than I thought so this is also putting me off a bit, as well as making me think I should make a quickish decision because of the amount of effort needed just to meet up.

That_Guy

Lon Dubh wrote: »

Right, went on a date. The guy is nice, no red flags, seems to be who he said he was, some similar interests between us, BUT (oh god why does there have to be but ) I can't see myself dating him. There was nothing at all wrong with him, but I just couldn't picture us together. He was a bit different personality-wise than what I was expecting (in spite of my efforts not to build up a picture of him before meeting).

Did anyone find doing internet dating that they felt like this initially (like that there was no chemistry/spark), but once they got to know the person a bit better they changed their minds? I am a bit of a slow burner, though I don't think that is the issue this time.

I might meet him one more time if he is interested just to see how it goes (I actually keep hoping he won't want to meet up again so I can avoid dealing with it, which is probably a very bad sign!). Maybe if I met him again and got to know more of him that I might see something in him that would attract me? Though on the other hand I might just be kidding myself. Unfortunately he lives much further away than I thought so this is also putting me off a bit, as well as making me think I should make a quickish decision because of the amount of effort needed just to meet up.

Seems to me that you've aleady made your mind up really. If you don't feel anything then there's really no point in forcing the issue.

stargazer 68

Ophiopogon wrote: »

No but thats what I don't want. I don't want to meet up asap I jsut want to chat first but it has not gone down well if I say it to someone. I think they think I'm stringing them along.

Problem with that is other people want to meet them too so you snooze you lose. Also you can find if you chat for ages and then meet up it can be a disappointment.

Maguined

Lon Dubh wrote: »

I might meet him one more time if he is interested just to see how it goes (I actually keep hoping he won't want to meet up again so I can avoid dealing with it, which is probably a very bad sign!). Maybe if I met him again and got to know more of him that I might see something in him that would attract me? Though on the other hand I might just be kidding myself. Unfortunately he lives much further away than I thought so this is also putting me off a bit, as well as making me think I should make a quickish decision because of the amount of effort needed just to meet up.

I would meet him once more just to give it the benefit of the doubt, everything else seemed good and you never know he might have just had a bad day so give it another shot and if you feel the same then you can end it without any worry of making a rushed decision.

Fluorescence

Email from OkC wrote:

You are Hot!


Hey <snip>,

We just detected that you're now among the most attractive people on OkCupid.

We learned this from clicks to your profile and reactions to you in Quickmatch and Quiver. Did you get a new haircut or something?
Well, it's working!

To celebrate, we've adjusted your OkCupid experience:

You'll see more attractive people in your match results.

This won't affect your match percentages, which are still based purely on your answers and desired match's answers. But we'll recommend more attractive people to you. You'll also appear more often to other attractive people.

Sign in to see your newly-shuffled matches. Have fun, and don't let this go to your head.

This amuses me muchlies :pac:

cyrusdvirus

fluorescence wrote: »

This amuses me muchlies :pac:

Damn.... i must be ass ugly so!!!

stargazer 68

gatecrash wrote: »

Damn.... i must be ass ugly so!!!

'You will see more attractive people in your search results'

Clearly not the OKC site that I use then!!

Fluorescence

gatecrash wrote: »

Damn.... i must be ass ugly so!!!

Well not everyone can be as breathtakingly stunning as I am

:pac: :pac: :pac: :pac: :pac: :pac:

Kali_Kalika

I had a date this weekend

Met up on saturday night and it was great, we'd chatted online and had been texting for awhile, so I pretty much knew exactly what to expect, he lived up to (and beyond!) all expectations.

Got a text from him that night after we parted, complimenting the night Always a good start in my opinion! And best of all, I got another text the next day again complimenting me and the evening. Good god, do I dare to say it ..... I think he might be a keeper.

But now that I said it - it'll probably go nowhere :rolleyes: But plans have been laid out for next weekend, so fingers crossed and all of that!

cyrusdvirus

fluorescence wrote: »

Well not everyone can be as breathtakingly stunning as I am

:pac: :pac: :pac: :pac: :pac: :pac:

That's no help!! :pac:

Fluorescence

The trick is to have the right profile picture. Fun and flirty :P Like mine!

phoenix833

Otis Driftwood wrote: »

I came across one profile the other day.The girl was mid/late 20s,breathtakingly attractive but had nothing in her profile whatsoever aswell as having her occupation in as,and I kid you not,"professional cúnt",ya,good one.:rolleyes:

Didn't know my ex was doing the online dating thing as well
:pac::pac::pac::pac:

That_Guy

Came across an interesting profile on POF.

Hi i am a full time nun, i love to pray to god.. he gives me wat i want. my favourite book is the bible i have an autographed copy. i have never had sex an i never will i am very faithful to my god and always will be!! i love to sing in choirs an i have de craic wi the other nuns u shud come along some day.. i am trying to make new friends

Lon Dubh

Thanks That Guy and Maguined, for your replies. He has written to me suggesting another date, so I am thinking of saying yes to this, but will I tell him I am very unsure whether it will go anywhere, so that he knows the score. We might chat a bit more before that as well which might help.

Overheal

I have girls messaging me, not the other way around. But it's annoying that they just seem to lose interest after a few messages. I feel like "hey, you're the one who contacted me, why do I feel like I'm the only one trying to hold a conversation ". Anyone have better luck?

Maguined

Lon Dubh wrote: »

Thanks That Guy and Maguined, for your replies. He has written to me suggesting another date, so I am thinking of saying yes to this, but will I tell him I am very unsure whether it will go anywhere, so that he knows the score. We might chat a bit more before that as well which might help.

Personally I wouldn't tell him anything before the date, this being only the second date things are inherently unsure so it would not be any benefit telling him as that would only make him nervous and could negatively influence his mood during the date. Just agree to the date, try and have a good time and if things work out then at the end you can just let him know you don't see it going anywhere then.

G-Money

Flip all happening here. Joined OKCupid, sent one mail, and as expected, no reply. I'm not too bothered anyway, it was more out of boredom that I mailed the girl in question. I received one mail from a girl in the US, I didn't reply, I don't feel like it's a legit profile.

stupidusername

Lon Dubh wrote: »

Thanks That Guy and Maguined, for your replies. He has written to me suggesting another date, so I am thinking of saying yes to this, but will I tell him I am very unsure whether it will go anywhere, so that he knows the score. We might chat a bit more before that as well which might help.

No need to tell him that at all, think about it, would you want to know if someone was unsure before you go out? if you're really not interested after this one then it's not that big a deal to let him down then.

Overheal wrote: »

I have girls messaging me, not the other way around. But it's annoying that they just seem to lose interest after a few messages. I feel like "hey, you're the one who contacted me, why do I feel like I'm the only one trying to hold a conversation ". Anyone have better luck?

well if they feel they haven't got much to talk to you about, you can't really blame them.

G-Money wrote: »

Flip all happening here. Joined OKCupid, sent one mail, and as expected, no reply. I'm not too bothered anyway, it was more out of boredom that I mailed the girl in question. I received one mail from a girl in the US, I didn't reply, I don't feel like it's a legit profile.

you're probably right to trust your feeling about it.

G-Money

It's funny. My ex is on OKCupid and she is coming up as the highest percentage match I don't see her getting in touch though and I don't think she wants me to either so.

newbee22

Hi guys! On pof how do you hide your profile from one person?! They haven't memailed so can't block that way?