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I was messaging another girl there about a week ago. She mailed me so I had a quick read through of her profile, she seemed sound, profile pic looked good, she lived nearby, thought to myself happy days.
Few messages back and forth, all good, had a second look at her profile pics and the second one I was not at all attracted to her (Shallow Hal syndrome:o)
I haven't replied to her last message, and shes visited my profile a few times...I'm such a bollocks!!
Something like that happened to me as well. Got texting a girl who lived nearby, her pics were ok but not stunning but I decided to give it a chance anyway as I know I'm not exactly photogenic myself. Was texting her back and forth. A few times I called her and there was no answer and she'd text back a while later saying she was just heading out the door or something. At this point we still hadn't spoken and she text'd something like "I'll call you tomorrow". The next day came, the phone never rang so I deleted her number and haven't heard from her since.
Don't know why people bother sometimes. F****g waste of time. I think if I ever join up to a dating site again I'm going to add something to my profile like "if you only want to email or text, I suggest you join ijustwantapenpal.ie or dontwastemyf****gtime.ie"
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Otis Driftwood wrote: »God damnit.
And this thread was going so well.
Don't write us all off there, Otis, my good man. :cool:0 -
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I joined Match.com 3 weeks ago and so far its leaving me kinda fustrated and a bit pissed off.
I know its only been 3 weeks and i should give it more time but i'm tempted to say F it and log off permentantly (i have been on it in the last couple of days). This is not my main boards account, i'm kinda use this account for more PI posts, so i'll try and be brutually honest.
So i'm looking for some perspective from people with more experience and any tips and advice you can offer.
Here's my experience so far (its going to be a good whinge
):
I'm a very good looking guy and i think i have a decent profile with a few good pics.
My first issue is i got loads of views, winks and emails in the first week (all from girls i didnt really fancy but its still flattering), then very few the second week and one the 3rd week. The first week i was getting 3/4 winks on average and day, that went down to one a day then last week one the whole week. i know when my profile was first setup, it was probably the top of all searches but i didnt think the drop off in interest should be that dramatic. My profie hasnt changed since i joined so what gives?
My second issue is sending bunches of emails and girls not even reading them. (i have a premium account so i can tell if they read them). I checked when girls where last active to make sure i wasnt emailing somebody who hasn't been on in 3 weeks. So i've sent a bunch of emails to girls and they havent read them which is quiet fustrating. Fair enough if i sent and email and they read it but didnt feel compelled to reply. But then i read a girls profile where she said she doesnt have a full account so she cant read email (WTF is the point in joining?). It seems a bit of a scam to me that you can send emails to girls, who dont have a proper account and cant even read you're email and Match.com doesnt even tell you this when you send an email.
(Also Match.com sending me my matches to girls who havent been online in 3weeks :mad:)
I sent 3 emails the last week when i was last on and i see the 3 girls havent read them yet.
So i have been emailing 3 girls with mixed results:
Girl #1: Some good emails back and forth and we will probably meet up this week when she is back from holidays. Only issue is she only had a few pics up on her profile when i first started emailing and she looked cute but since then has put up more pics and she doesnt look great so if i had seen the other pics i wouldnt have emailed (sorry that sounds really bad). So i dont know if i should meet up with her cos i know i'd be wasting her time.
Girl #2: Nice looking girl, seems like good banter. Emailing back and forth, i send her an email and she doesnt log in for 3 days. I see when she does log in she hasnt read my email...so ok fair enough she hasnt had time to read it. Its been a week now and the weird thing is she's looked at my profile a couple of times since i sent the email, but still hasnt read my email!! Any ideas whats going on? Maybe she accidently deleted the email or something. I'm going to give it a couple more days and just shoot her another email, but its certainly weird.
Girl #3: Very beautiful girl, the best looking by far. We exchanged about 3 or 4 emails, her responses were always very enthusiastic, but then nothing...Just didnt reply to my last email, a bit disappointing. She's been online since and has read it. I'm going to take it she's not interested but why did she bother to reply in the first place? i may shoot her an email in a couple of days in a desperation move (i guess i have nothing to lose).
Ive sent a bunch of emails and probably getting 1in5 to respond so i dont know if its worth the hassle going forward. Im probably taking it more personally than i should, but taking time to write emails with the prospect that the girl may not even look at it is a pain.0 -
looks like i shall be adding to the unsuccessful stories myself! the guy i was dating for the last 4 weeks upped and disappeared on me too...
fair enough if he decided it wasn't going to work out (it was going quite well!), but i would have thought id deserve at least a text :rolleyes:
so back to the drawing board for me (aka pof) mind you, im not sure if i have the patience for it anymore!0 -
scared_silly wrote: »I joined Match.com 3 weeks ago and so far its leaving me kinda fustrated and a bit pissed off.
I know its only been 3 weeks and i should give it more time but i'm tempted to say F it and log off permentantly (i have been on it in the last couple of days). This is not my main boards account, i'm kinda use this account for more PI posts, so i'll try and be brutually honest.
So i'm looking for some perspective from people with more experience and any tips and advice you can offer.
Here's my experience so far (its going to be a good whinge):
I'm a very good looking guy and i think i have a decent profile with a few good pics.
My first issue is i got loads of views, winks and emails in the first week (all from girls i didnt really fancy but its still flattering), then very few the second week and one the 3rd week. The first week i was getting 3/4 winks on average and day, that went down to one a day then last week one the whole week. i know when my profile was first setup, it was probably the top of all searches but i didnt think the drop off in interest should be that dramatic. My profie hasnt changed since i joined so what gives?
My second issue is sending bunches of emails and girls not even reading them. (i have a premium account so i can tell if they read them). I checked when girls where last active to make sure i wasnt emailing somebody who hasn't been on in 3 weeks. So i've sent a bunch of emails to girls and they havent read them which is quiet fustrating. Fair enough if i sent and email and they read it but didnt feel compelled to reply. But then i read a girls profile where she said she doesnt have a full account so she cant read email (WTF is the point in joining?). It seems a bit of a scam to me that you can send emails to girls, who dont have a proper account and cant even read you're email and Match.com doesnt even tell you this when you send an email.
(Also Match.com sending me my matches to girls who havent been online in 3weeks :mad:)
I sent 3 emails the last week when i was last on and i see the 3 girls havent read them yet.
So i have been emailing 3 girls with mixed results:
Girl #1: Some good emails back and forth and we will probably meet up this week when she is back from holidays. Only issue is she only had a few pics up on her profile when i first started emailing and she looked cute but since then has put up more pics and she doesnt look great so if i had seen the other pics i wouldnt have emailed (sorry that sounds really bad). So i dont know if i should meet up with her cos i know i'd be wasting her time.
Girl #2: Nice looking girl, seems like good banter. Emailing back and forth, i send her an email and she doesnt log in for 3 days. I see when she does log in she hasnt read my email...so ok fair enough she hasnt had time to read it. Its been a week now and the weird thing is she's looked at my profile a couple of times since i sent the email, but still hasnt read my email!! Any ideas whats going on? Maybe she accidently deleted the email or something. I'm going to give it a couple more days and just shoot her another email, but its certainly weird.
Girl #3: Very beautiful girl, the best looking by far. We exchanged about 3 or 4 emails, her responses were always very enthusiastic, but then nothing...Just didnt reply to my last email, a bit disappointing. She's been online since and has read it. I'm going to take it she's not interested but why did she bother to reply in the first place? i may shoot her an email in a couple of days in a desperation move (i guess i have nothing to lose).
Ive sent a bunch of emails and probably getting 1in5 to respond so i dont know if its worth the hassle going forward. Im probably taking it more personally than i should, but taking time to write emails with the prospect that the girl may not even look at it is a pain.
Your first mistake is admitting to having dual accounts... i think the mods tend to frown on that sorta thing!! :pac:
As concerns your post...
very good looking guy..... Not meaning to sound smart, but who says? Your mum? You? Blood relations tend not to be the best arbiters in this example.
I would regard myself as a decent enough looking bloke, but there's nothing about me that makes a woman swoon when i walk by. I certainly wouldn't say I'm very good looking....even though my mother does!!
scared_silly wrote: »My second issue is sending bunches of emails and girls not even reading them. (i have a premium account so i can tell if they read them)
The ladies not reading the mails thing has been done to death here. There is one user on here who stated that she got over 200 mails in a week and physically didn't have the time to read them all. Maybe these women are already conversing with other blokes and don't want to start another conversation thread as they could well be approaching meet up stage with the other chap. Maybe they had a look at your profile and decided "not for me".... it does happen, even to the very good looking ones among us. There are a whole bunch of reasons. Either way, don't let it frustrate you, just pick yourself up, dust yourself down, and move onscared_silly wrote: »But then i read a girls profile where she said she doesnt have a full account so she cant read email (WTF is the point in joining?). It seems a bit of a scam to me that you can send emails to girls, who dont have a proper account and cant even read you're email and Match.com doesnt even tell you this when you send an email.
The girl who doesn't have a full profile could well have let her premium membership lapse. I know a girl in real life (who recommended match to me) who is still on it, but has a lapsed profile. And they can still see your profile. One other thing to remember, match, and all these other sites are providing a service. It's in their interest to get money out of you. So making it that you have to pay to read mail.... well yeah, it may be a pain in the arse, but it's not really a scam. you know what you are getting into. And match does say whether or not a profile is full/premium when you are looking at it.scared_silly wrote: »Girl #1: Some good emails back and forth and we will probably meet up this week when she is back from holidays. Only issue is she only had a few pics up on her profile when i first started emailing and she looked cute but since then has put up more pics and she doesnt look great so if i had seen the other pics i wouldnt have emailed (sorry that sounds really bad). So i dont know if i should meet up with her cos i know i'd be wasting her time.
Not everyone is going to have all perfect pictures. There was an initial attraction on your part, why not meet and see if there is a real attraction. Or are you really that vain?scared_silly wrote: »Girl #2: Nice looking girl, seems like good banter. Emailing back and forth, i send her an email and she doesnt log in for 3 days. I see when she does log in she hasnt read my email...so ok fair enough she hasnt had time to read it. Its been a week now and the weird thing is she's looked at my profile a couple of times since i sent the email, but still hasnt read my email!! Any ideas whats going on? Maybe she accidently deleted the email or something. I'm going to give it a couple more days and just shoot her another email, but its certainly weird.
Maybe she's decided you are not worth her time??? Maybe she's very good looking and out of your league and she doesn't want to waste your time. Maybe she saw some different pictures of you and if she had seen them first she wouldn't have responded.
I wouldn't bother shooting her another mail. She's obviously decided not to bother pursuing it any further. if she was interested, and had accidentally deleted your mail, there is nothing stopping her from mailing you....scared_silly wrote: »Girl #3: Very beautiful girl, the best looking by far. We exchanged about 3 or 4 emails, her responses were always very enthusiastic, but then nothing...Just didnt reply to my last email, a bit disappointing. She's been online since and has read it. I'm going to take it she's not interested but why did she bother to reply in the first place? i may shoot her an email in a couple of days in a desperation move (i guess i have nothing to lose).
I'm afraid that she's another one to leave to one side. No point in mailing her again and pestering her. She'll only get annoyed, and then you have no chance whatsoever. if you leave it for a month or 2, then mail her again, it might be better.... and if you do wait until then don't make reference to the fact that you were in contact with her before.scared_silly wrote: »Ive sent a bunch of emails and probably getting 1in5 to respond so i dont know if its worth the hassle going forward. Im probably taking it more personally than i should, but taking time to write emails with the prospect that the girl may not even look at it is a pain.
Yeah, you are taking it too personally. It's not a guaranteed life changing thing. When you mail a girl consider it a bonus if she responds, not a necessity.0 -
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Is this the norm now ??
It's becoming more popular in real life as well. I've heard a good few stories about people who were dumped by the other person simply blanking/ignoring them. And I thought being dumped by text was bad :eek:
Not surprising really that people choose to end their online correspondences in this manner, if there are basically no consequences at all for doing so. Quite sad 0 -
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looks like i shall be adding to the unsuccessful stories myself! the guy i was dating for the last 4 weeks upped and disappeared on me too...
fair enough if he decided it wasn't going to work out (it was going quite well!), but i would have thought id deserve at least a text :rolleyes:
so back to the drawing board for me (aka pof) mind you, im not sure if i have the patience for it anymore!
That is a pity. Yes he shouldn't have blanked you, especially since you had met up a few times. I might ignore a first message from someone, but if there has been any chat, and certainly after meeting up, I would let them know where they stood, so that they can move on and look for someone else.0 -
That is a pity. Yes he shouldn't have blanked you, especially since you had met up a few times. I might ignore a first message from someone, but if there has been any chat, and certainly after meeting up, I would let them know where they stood, so that they can move on and look for someone else.
yup, i think thats just common decency, something which some people don't seem to have
we had 8 dates in all, always txting, ringing etc and then he went cold..i tried texting him or mailed him on facebook to find out what had happened, but he ignored me! so thought id look up pof, and there he was
that seems to be the new way of dumping alright, go back online and hope the other person gets the hint? I think its cowardly, i wudnt dream of doing that to someone!0 -
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I went out with a girl 3 times and after the 3rd date she started ignoring me. She didn't respond to my texts so I didn't bother trying to contact her any other way. Am a bit surprised as things were going ok but it was weird. During the 3rd date I suddenly felt very strange and remember thinking to myself "This isn't working". She was at my place but I didn't make a move on her. Perhaps that's why she blanked me after, who knows.
Sometimes you can just lose the spark?
Its a hard one to explain thou :rolleyes:
I thought alright during my last date, that something wasn't right..
Whats meant to be, will be 0 -
Sometimes you can just lose the spark?
Its a hard one to explain thou :rolleyes:
I thought alright during my last date, that something wasn't right..
Whats meant to be, will be
Sorry didnt see the earlier post about seeing him for 4 weeks - thought it was one date thing! No thats a bit off - has happened to me too though. Seems to be a case of if I dont contact her she will get the hint (or him cos Im sure women do it too).0 -
Sometimes you can just lose the spark?
Its a hard one to explain thou :rolleyes:
I thought alright during my last date, that something wasn't right..
Whats meant to be, will be
That worries me a bit. I always thought there's either a spark or there isn't. I didn't think it would ever be the case that I'd lose interest after a few dates. I guess it's not the biggest stretch of the imagination anyway.0 -
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yup, i think thats just common decency, something which some people don't seem to have
we had 8 dates in all, always txting, ringing etc and then he went cold..i tried texting him or mailed him on facebook to find out what had happened, but he ignored me! so thought id look up pof, and there he was
that seems to be the new way of dumping alright, go back online and hope the other person gets the hint? I think its cowardly, i wudnt dream of doing that to someone!
Yes it is very cowardly. It doesn't take that much to send a text or e-mail, and they could ignore any contact after that if they wanted, but just to let the person hang on for a bit wondering is bad form. I hadn't realised you had had so many dates, which only makes it worse I think.0
This discussion has been closed.
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