Online Dating

kieranfitz

That_Guy wrote: »

Because of good news we hope.

I wish. Over 2 years on pof and nothing what so ever. Nearly a year and a half on okc and 2 dates, one girl I was briefly in a relationship with, the second, just wasn't feeling it.

Ammsy500

Chatting to a guy on pof whose so my type but he only replies every few days and Ive seen hes been online. So annoying but hes one of the few on there that has replied with decent messages(ive had some shockingly bad txt msgs recently). Bit the bullet and asked him did he fancy a drink sometime so hopefully wont be waiting long for a response.

KTRIC

I got a really strange message on OKC last night from some lady. It was written like we spoke before and we never did. I heard it's a trick used by some to make you think you had some sort of connection before.

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

Chatting to a guy on pof whose so my type but he only replies every few days and Ive seen hes been online. So annoying but hes one of the few on there that has replied with decent messages(ive had some shockingly bad txt msgs recently). Bit the bullet and asked him did he fancy a drink sometime so hopefully wont be waiting long for a response.

any news?

Samich

Girl appears in search, I mail. I send a pic and she asks am I in college in Galway (at this moment I presume she recognises me), she doesn't, she says she "hasn't had the pleasure of coming across me". We only chat for a bit but things were good. She says she'll be on tomorrow (yesterday) and I say goodnight, I wasn't on yesterday due to being fierce busy with college. She has deleted her account.

Now I think I know who she is on fb as her name was her real name on pof. 3 mutual friends. Is there anyone who thinks I should contact her?

Larianne

Samich wrote: »

Girl appears in search, I mail. I send a pic and she asks am I in college in Galway (at this moment I presume she recognises me), she doesn't, she says she "hasn't had the pleasure of coming across me". We only chat for a bit but things were good. She says she'll be on tomorrow (yesterday) and I say goodnight, I wasn't on yesterday due to being fierce busy with college. She has deleted her account.

Now I think I know who she is on fb as her name was her real name on pof. 3 mutual friends. Is there anyone who thinks I should contact her?

Hmm.. I'd leave it myself.

newbee22

Samich wrote: »

Girl appears in search, I mail. I send a pic and she asks am I in college in Galway (at this moment I presume she recognises me), she doesn't, she says she "hasn't had the pleasure of coming across me". We only chat for a bit but things were good. She says she'll be on tomorrow (yesterday) and I say goodnight, I wasn't on yesterday due to being fierce busy with college. She has deleted her account.

Now I think I know who she is on fb as her name was her real name on pof. 3 mutual friends. Is there anyone who thinks I should contact her?

Speaking as a girl I don't think you should Samich, I think I'd run for the hills, but that's just me!:o

Samich

Advice taken

Ammsy500

managerman wrote: »

any news?

Well he responded alot quicker this time wasnt waiting a few days. We were exchanging a few stories about some past internet dates we both had and I just said something along the lines of 'well if you fancy having a drink sometime maybe it would be better than some of our past dates...' just threw it out there then got a message back agreeing that ye it would be better as we seemed to be getting along.....not a round about yes... just feel like we are becoming more like pen pals :rolleyes: Just at the stage where i want to go on a date already but dont want to be pushing it.

Sounds stupid but I was the one to message him first and it seems to be me doing the chasing. I know some guys on here have said they would like the girl to message them first but Im one of those old fashioned girls who likes a guy to make the first move or at least the next move. If i message him I would like it if hes the one to ask 'hey wanna go out sometime'.... I dont know i have that mind set that i seem 'desperate' doing all the chasing. Maybe one of you guys could enlighten me on this topic :cool:

Otis Driftwood

Honestly?

It sounds like he is angling for someone else at the moment but is keeping you at hand in case it doesnt pan out.I know with myself if a girl straight asked me out Id give a yay or nay straight away.

Sorry.

the_boss85

I joined POF yesterday and skimmed through around 20/30 profiles. I picked 4 or 5 that I had something in common with and was attracted to and sent them mails. I got zero responses.

From looking at previous posts I take it this is fairly common?

Ammsy500

Otis Driftwood wrote: »

Honestly?

It sounds like he is angling for someone else at the moment but is keeping you at hand in case it doesnt pan out.I know with myself if a girl straight asked me out Id give a yay or nay straight away.

Sorry.

Thanks Otis was thinking the same thing...im probably one of many hes chatting to, ah well wont be loosing sleep over it anyway

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

Well he responded alot quicker this time wasnt waiting a few days. We were exchanging a few stories about some past internet dates we both had and I just said something along the lines of 'well if you fancy having a drink sometime maybe it would be better than some of our past dates...' just threw it out there then got a message back agreeing that ye it would be better as we seemed to be getting along.....not a round about yes... just feel like we are becoming more like pen pals :rolleyes: Just at the stage where i want to go on a date already but dont want to be pushing it.

Sounds stupid but I was the one to message him first and it seems to be me doing the chasing. I know some guys on here have said they would like the girl to message them first but Im one of those old fashioned girls who likes a guy to make the first move or at least the next move. If i message him I would like it if hes the one to ask 'hey wanna go out sometime'.... I dont know i have that mind set that i seem 'desperate' doing all the chasing. Maybe one of you guys could enlighten me on this topic :cool:

honestly, if a girl asked me out id give her an answer straight away, no point in dwelling, i think maybe he isnt interested, so maybe just forget about him! plenty more lads on there to take you out on a date

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

Thanks Otis was thinking the same thing...im probably one of many hes chatting to, ah well wont be loosing sleep over it anyway

probably id say... it is a dating site!

sharper

I must be the only person on the planet that'd be nervous if he was asked out, would keep the conversation going and try to work up to saying yes.

Larianne

sharper wrote: »

I must be the only person on the planet that'd be nervous if he was asked out, would keep the conversation going and try to work up to saying yes.

so if someone asked you out you wouldn't say yes straight away?

sharper

Larianne wrote: »

so if someone asked you out you wouldn't say yes straight away?

Correct! These things aren't easy for everyone. Social situations with strangers are nerve wracking.

Larianne

sharper wrote: »

Correct! These things aren't easy for everyone. Social situations with strangers are nerve wracking.

But you might give the other person the wrong impression if you keep putting off answering them/avoiding the question. ..

Ammsy500

sharper wrote: »

Correct! These things aren't easy for everyone. Social situations with strangers are nerve wracking.

I can understand this for some people on dating sites especially when its your first one. When its new it can be quite 'scary' going to meet somebody off the internet and definitely nerve wracking!

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

I can understand this for some people on dating sites especially when its your first one. When its new it can be quite 'scary' going to meet somebody off the internet and definitely nerve wracking!

i guess so... but once you get into it, its grand? i have never met anyone so, not sure how id be like, prob be nervous, but get over it, once you settle down

sharper

Larianne wrote: »

But you might give the other person the wrong impression if you keep putting off answering them/avoiding the question. ..

Yes, it's a difficult problem to deal with. Even in general people are prone to thinking you're stuck up if you're quiet and avoid social situations ("Oh he thinks he's too good to talk to us/go out with us" etc).

Larianne

managerman wrote: »

i guess so... but once you get into it, its grand? i have never met anyone so, not sure how id be like, prob be nervous, but get over it, once you settle down

Its only natural to be nervous but putting off meeting someone with plant a seed in their head thinking your holding out for some reason or whatever.

managerman

Larianne wrote: »

Its only natural to be nervous but putting off meeting someone with plant a seed in their head thinking your holding out for some reason or whatever.

its like any other date, meeting a girl for a first time, let loose and go with the flow then

Ammsy500

managerman wrote: »

i guess so... but once you get into it, its grand? i have never met anyone so, not sure how id be like, prob be nervous, but get over it, once you settle down

Im always soooo nervous before i meet the person but i always relax once i get there. After the akward first few minutes of meeting i always feel like its just like meeting anybody else for a drink etc. you relax into it.... unless their strange or weird :pac: After the first few dates it gets easier you start to know what to expect. You realise their just like you, normal!

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

Im always soooo nervous before i meet the person but i always relax once i get there. After the akward first few minutes of meeting i always feel like its just like meeting anybody else for a drink etc. you relax into it.... unless their strange or weird :pac: After the first few dates it gets easier you start to know what to expect. You realise their just like you, normal!

ha ha! whats normal these days??! you on pof?

Ammsy500

managerman wrote: »

ha ha! whats normal these days??! you on pof?

I just mean their not a serial killer or some very strange computer geek I like geeks before anyone shoots me down just not strange ones. And yes i am on that site.

managerman

Ammsy500 wrote: »

I just mean their not a serial killer or some very strange computer geek I like geeks before anyone shoots me down just not strange ones. And yes i am on that site.

geeks are cool!! sure i'll pm ya

Otis Driftwood

Id like to remind people that this thread is NOT here to try and pick up guy's/gal's.

Whatever ye do via PM is yer own business but please keep it to PM only.

Cheers.

missbelle

managerman wrote: »

i have never met anyone so, not sure how id be like, prob be nervous, but get over it, once you settle down

I found that the pro of meeting someone that I'd met online, was that I had gotten a good vibe from their messages that this is someone who I'd get along with (I haven't met up with anyone unless I was chatting for a week or two), and that we have similar interests or seem to have good banter.

The chance you're taking is that their photo was over-flattering, or that there just isn't that 'spark' in real life. But,there is always that chance too when you compare that to meeting someone in a club on a Fri or Sat night when you've had more than a few drinks, and you are texting for a few days and decide to meet up. That's fairly nerve-wracking too, meeting the sober version of that wonderful guy/girl from the weekend that you can't quite remember what they looked like

Worth giving it a go though, and then you'll know

managerman

missbelle wrote: »

I found that the pro of meeting someone that I'd met online, was that I had gotten a good vibe from their messages that this is someone who I'd get along with (I haven't met up with anyone unless I was chatting for a week or two), and that we have similar interests or seem to have good banter.

The chance you're taking is that their photo was over-flattering, or that there just isn't that 'spark' in real life. But,there is always that chance too when you compare that to meeting someone in a club on a Fri or Sat night when you've had more than a few drinks, and you are texting for a few days and decide to meet up. That's fairly nerve-wracking too, meeting the sober version of that wonderful guy/girl from the weekend that you can't quite remember what they looked like

Worth giving it a go though, and then you'll know

defo agree with you on all points there... sure i just have to find someone to meet now!