Online Dating

Galvasean

KyussBishop wrote: »

.
May as well chat to her a bit even if ya don't fancy her (not just out of politeness either; though understandable if ya get a lot of mail); good opportunity to get to know someone regardless of dating

I don't know about that. I'd hate to be seen to be leading anyone on / wasting their time. Besides, I have lots of friends. I signed up to a dating site to find dates, not mates. I'm sure most are the same.
Heck, I was actually considering putting my profile on hidden (kind of might be half seeing a girl from IRL) when the message arrived.
Basically, has anyone any tips to converse with someone on such a website and show you aren't interested but in a polite way?

The_Morrigan

Hyperbullet wrote: »

Or she could be a Velociraptor waiting to pounce!

Now that is a jump in thought process!!

KyussBishop

Ya fair enough
Good question; it's certainly nicer to say something than to simply ignore people, like what usually happens; not certain on what is good to say mind, perhaps make mention of what you did here? (your half-seeing someone and thinking of making profile hidden)

Larianne

Galvasean wrote: »

I don't know about that. I'd hate to be seen to be leading anyone on / wasting their time. Besides, I have lots of friends. I signed up to a dating site to find dates, not mates. I'm sure most are the same.
Heck, I was actually considering putting my profile on hidden (kind of might be half seeing a girl from IRL) when the message arrived.
Basically, has anyone any tips to converse with someone on such a website and show you aren't interested but in a polite way?

I think you just have to say thanks but no thanks.

Galvasean

The_Morrigan wrote: »

Now that is a jump in thought process!!

To be honest, if it was a Velociraptor I would be extremely interested...

The_Morrigan

Galvasean wrote: »

I don't know about that. I'd hate to be seen to be leading anyone on / wasting their time. Besides, I have lots of friends. I signed up to a dating site to find dates, not mates. I'm sure most are the same.
Heck, I was actually considering putting my profile on hidden (kind of might be half seeing a girl from IRL) when the message arrived.
Basically, has anyone any tips to converse with someone on such a website and show you aren't interested but in a polite way?

Maybe tell her that you're just in the process of organising a second/third date with someone and that her mail came just as you were about to amend your profile.
Technically that is true - just make sure you amend your profile or change it to hidden!

Otis Driftwood

Galvasean wrote: »

I don't know about that. I'd hate to be seen to be leading anyone on / wasting their time. Besides, I have lots of friends. I signed up to a dating site to find dates, not mates. I'm sure most are the same.
Heck, I was actually considering putting my profile on hidden (kind of might be half seeing a girl from IRL) when the message arrived.
Basically, has anyone any tips to converse with someone on such a website and show you aren't interested but in a polite way?

Lol at the non committal Galva.
:pac:

yoyo83

just tell them straight out, i tell them sorry not interested at the moment im only browsing is all. works for me lol

Galvasean

Otis Driftwood wrote: »

Lol at the non committal Galva.
:pac:

Hey, I'm the one that wants to move things forward. From my experience, contrary to the stereotype portrayed in rubbish American TV shows, women are often terrified of commitment.

yoyo83

i think men are terrified of commitment

Otis Driftwood

Galvasean wrote: »

Hey, I'm the one that wants to move things forward. From my experience, contrary to the stereotype portrayed in rubbish American TV shows, women are often terrified of commitment.

yoyo83 wrote: »

i think men are terrified of commitment

Anyone can be terrified of commitment in fairness.Its not a gender specific thing.

yoyo83

i know but i think its more in common in men then women, i should know happens alot to me with fella, they go off the radar

Galvasean

yoyo83 wrote: »

i know but i think its more in common in men then women, i should know happens alot to me with fella, they go off the radar

Happens to me a lot with women, I should know.

Aaaaaaand we're back to Otis' post.

PS: please note I said women are often terrified of commitment, so I wasn't generalizing.

yoyo83

Galvasean wrote: »

Happens to me a lot with women, I should know.

Aaaaaaand we're back to Otis' post.

PS: please note I said women are often terrified of commitment, so I wasn't generalizing.

ok

Kevin Duffy

In trying to end an exchange or not follow up on something, I tend to say thanks, but we don't seem to have as much in common as I'd like in order to take it further, so I won't waste your time, best of luck, hope you find what you're looking for. It's neutral and bland, but it really is the basis on which I'd be cutting things off, so I think it's fair.

stargazer 68

Kevin Duffy wrote: »

In trying to end an exchange or not follow up on something, I tend to say thanks, but we don't seem to have as much in common as I'd like in order to take it further, so I won't waste your time, best of luck, hope you find what you're looking for. It's neutral and bland, but it really is the basis on which I'd be cutting things off, so I think it's fair.

Sounds fair enough. There is nothing worse than someone replying to your mail and chatting for a while and then find out that they aren't interested. Best be honest straight off - wish I could take my own advice!! :rolleyes:

oompaloompa

*sigh*

Was chatting to a nice guy yesterday evening, just logged in to check for messages.... 6 new, 3 from him...

2nd & 3rd mails.... 'why aren't you talking to me/why oh why don't you love me' type messages!!! :eek:

Galvasean

oompaloompa wrote: »

*sigh*

Was chatting to a nice guy yesterday evening, just logged in to check for messages.... 6 new, 3 from him...

2nd & 3rd mails.... 'why aren't you talking to me/why oh why don't you love me' type messages!!! :eek:

:eek: Just... RUN!!!!

Larianne

Galvasean wrote: »

:eek: Just... RUN!!!!

Or Block user.

coffee_cake

oompaloompa wrote: »

*sigh*

Was chatting to a nice guy yesterday evening, just logged in to check for messages.... 6 new, 3 from him...

2nd & 3rd mails.... 'why aren't you talking to me/why oh why don't you love me' type messages!!! :eek:

:eek:
Holy moly...

oompaloompa

Yep I'm just choosing to ignore!

I actually always thought that it was only girls who had the crazy type streak!
:P

MudSkipper

:eek:

did he not see you hadnt read his first message? or even that you'd not been online?

Guess my unintentional tactic of reading messages on the go or at work and not getting round to replying until the evening would weed out the desperados like that one fairly quick....... bullet dodged there oompa

Maguined

oompaloompa wrote: »

*sigh*

Was chatting to a nice guy yesterday evening, just logged in to check for messages.... 6 new, 3 from him...

2nd & 3rd mails.... 'why aren't you talking to me/why oh why don't you love me' type messages!!! :eek:

Insecurity is such a turn on. :rolleyes:

Galvasean

So the sis continues her experiments in online dating. She set up a POF account yesterday at about 7pm. She now has 16 pages of mails. That's right 16 pages, not 16 individual mails, 16 PAGES. Bear in mind there are 10 messages per page :eek:
All this from setting up an account, filling it in, uploading photos and buggering off for a while.
Puts things into perspective for me, ie: don't feel discouraged if girls don't reply lads. They probably can't handle all the mail!

Maguined

Galvasean wrote: »

So the sis continues her experiments in online dating. She set up a POF account yesterday at about 7pm. She now has 16 pages of mails. That's right 16 pages, not 16 individual mails, 16 PAGES. Bear in mind there are 10 messages per page :eek:
All this from setting up an account, filling it in, uploading photos and buggering off for a while.
Puts things into perspective for me, ie: don't feel discouraged if girls don't reply lads. They probably can't handle all the mail!

:eek:

You sure you are the hot one of the siblings?

Galvasean

Maguined wrote: »

:eek:

You sure you are the hot one of the siblings?

She got the smarts, I got the looks.

..at least that's what mammy told me.

Gillo

Maguined wrote: »

Insecurity is such a turn on. :rolleyes:

Really is it, thats great because I wasn't sure.
You are going to reply now aren't you? like soon...

Seriously though, I was chatting to someone like that for a short while, mails were grand it was only when we started texting each other, complete nightmare if I didn't write back within five minutes there was another text; "where are you? / "Write back please". I'd definitely be ignoring them Oompa.

oh yeah, speaking of "not wanting to let go" I checked my credit card statement this morning and it turns out a site I had been using actually run a rolling subscription and had charged me €100 since the start of the year despite me not having signed in since mid Dec, it's my own fault for not checking my statements each month but as I hadn't being using card for anything I didn't bother looking at them (so yeah my own fault), but just in case anyone else out there is paying for a site, just make sure you're aware if it's a subscription or a once off payment.

frag420

Galvasean wrote: »

So the sis continues her experiments in online dating. She set up a POF account yesterday at about 7pm. She now has 16 pages of mails. That's right 16 pages, not 16 individual mails, 16 PAGES. Bear in mind there are 10 messages per page :eek:
All this from setting up an account, filling it in, uploading photos and buggering off for a while.
Puts things into perspective for me, ie: don't feel discouraged if girls don't reply lads. They probably can't handle all the mail!

I wonder if she read my mail? I better mail her to make sure.

ha ha

oompaloompa

Galvasean wrote: »

So the sis continues her experiments in online dating. She set up a POF account yesterday at about 7pm. She now has 16 pages of mails. That's right 16 pages, not 16 individual mails, 16 PAGES. Bear in mind there are 10 messages per page :eek:
All this from setting up an account, filling it in, uploading photos and buggering off for a while.
Puts things into perspective for me, ie: don't feel discouraged if girls don't reply lads. They probably can't handle all the mail!

I second this! I honestly couldn't reply to all the mails I get. I'd be quitting work just to reply to one liners!

I only reply to mails where the guy has made an effort to mail me. If he has taken the time to write a proper message, then I will always reply.

Mind you, I would adopt same approach in a pub situation... if a guy makes effort to come over and start chatting, I'll always chat to them. It's manners, and you don't have to be rude just if you aren't attracted to them. Who knows, you could bag yourself a great friend.

I have friends (sometimes I'm a little ashamed of them), if a guy they don't fancy tries to chat to them, they will actually turn their body away from them and ignore. More recently, a friend was chatting to guy on a night out, another friend kept trying to actually pull her away from him, all the time saying... don't talk to him... he's rotten. Disgusting behaviour.

amandaf675

jesus... i never have mail on pof