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So, who'd win in a fight?

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    #32
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,073 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    Killer Pigeon wrote: »
    No, Dawkins would take the hit so that Hawking would have time to prepare his powerpoint presentation on Magnetohydrodynamics. A few seconds after the introduction Jakkass' brain would be reduced to mush.

    I think you missed the bit where Dawkins was in the ambulance on his way to intensive care after Jakkass smashed his nose into his face.


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    #33
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    I think you missed the bit where Dawkins was in the ambulance on his way to intensive care after Jakkass smashed his nose into his face.
    I dunno... A closed mind might be seen as a handicap too! The ambulance might be full with more than one! :pac:


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    #34
    mcmoustache
    Registered Users Posts: 7,236 ✭✭✭mcmoustache


    If jakkass went straight for hawking and eliminated him, and then if dawkins killed jakkass with an atheist falcon punch, would it end in a stalemate?


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    #35
    biko
    Registered Users Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    If these guys could join god's side maybe

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfv-Qn1M58I


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZFG5PKw504


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    #36
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    biko wrote: »
    If this guy could join god's side maybe

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfv-Qn1M58I
    Was he serious or was he taking the piss?
    Thats the funniest thing I've seen in ages either way! :pac:


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    #37
    coffee_cake
    Registered Users Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    I don't understand why everyone calls him Stephen Hawkins instead of Hawking :confused:

    Anyway... Jakkass... I think any opponent would headdesk so much they'd lose! :D


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    #38
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,073 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    bluewolf wrote: »
    I don't understand why everyone calls him Stephen Hawkins instead of Hawking :confused:

    Anyway... Jakkass... I think any opponent would headdesk so much they'd lose! :D

    Not everyone:P


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    #39
    coffee_cake
    Registered Users Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    Not everyone:P

    No, just see it a lot, it's interesting how it's so widespread :)


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    #40
    Killer Pigeon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,132 ✭✭✭Killer Pigeon


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    I think you missed the bit where Dawkins was in the ambulance on his way to intensive care after Jakkass smashed his nose into his face.

    Well who cares there are still 26 boardsies here who will be willing to avenge their deaths, against the 11 boardsies who support a fairytale.


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    #41
    ejmaztec
    Registered Users Posts: 24,073 ✭✭✭✭ejmaztec


    mcmoustache wrote: »
    If jakkass went straight for hawking and eliminated him, and then if dawkins killed jakkass with an atheist falcon punch, would it end in a stalemate?

    So you decided against the atheist gun?:P Good choice.

    Anyway, in your revised scenario, you're forgetting God, who will transmorph into a water-soaked spongue, drowning Dawkins at the end of the next round.


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    #42
    Killer Pigeon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,132 ✭✭✭Killer Pigeon


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    So you decided against the atheist gun?:P Good choice.

    Anyway, in your revised scenario, you're forgetting God, who will transmorph into a water-soaked spongue, drowning Dawkins at the end of the next round.

    But Jakkass it still praying to God that he might appear in order to prove his existence but he doesn't appear so Jakkass fails epically.


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    #43
    take everything
    Registered Users Posts: 9,806 ✭✭✭take everything


    dlofnep wrote: »
    Trust me, I've wrote enough essays on the guy to last me a lifetime.

    :o:pac:;)


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    #44
    Plowman
    Registered Users Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭Plowman


    This post has been deleted.


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    #45
    Killer Pigeon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,132 ✭✭✭Killer Pigeon


    Plowman wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.

    Sorry, you entered the data all wrong, let me correct that for you;

    Internet's answer with more accurate data input


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    #46
    piby
    Closed Accounts Posts: 539 ✭✭✭piby


    Even though I'm a scientist I actually voted for God because if he was real than he'd be all powerful and totally kick ass!!

    I'm pretty sure it would go something like this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mnNpqc7rXA

    (Watch from 8:00-9:00 and replace Freddy with God and Nancy with Dawkins!)

    The very fact that Dawkins doesn't believe wins him the day!!


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    #47
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    Plowman wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.
    Killer Pigeon wrote: »
    Sorry, you entered the data all wrong, let me correct that for you;

    Internet's answer with more accurate data input

    Can't get much more conclusive than that.


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    #48
    Riddle101
    Registered Users Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭Riddle101


    My prediction. God wouldn't show up because he's not about to get involved in some petty squabble when he could be in heaven making love to Marilyn Monroe and Britney Murphy, and while Elvis Presley sings in the backround. So it would really be between Dawkins/Hawking and Jakkass. But Hawking is paralysed and most likely weak so it's really a fight between Jakkass and Dawkins. I give the edge Jakkass though.


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    #49
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,159 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    Well if he could be arsed, God's gonna smite but good.

    Hawking: I understand the laws of physics, I have added to some of them and from them I understand the nature of the very universe.

    God: Hang on a tic monkey boy. I've got prior copyright.

    Hawking: Hang on nothing. I've got fair use. Lets see you argue that in a universal court of law.

    God: Wut?!! I'll have you in court monkey boy. Oh shíte, wait. I havent talked to Satan in a while, there goes my legal team..... *thinks* Right you feck, a plague of... oh... Damn, coals to Newcastle there.... Sorry on that score. Well it made you more famous than other physics types. I was going for the Davros look. Did I mention I liked a brief history of time? Very good. Mostly correct too. Brought back some nice memories. Makes a nice change. Fancy a beer?

    Dawkins: Hang on you don't even exist!!

    God: Oh really? So you're talking to yourself, yet again? You see the big bang? yea that was me. Expansion and all that quirky shíte that gets you lot all confused, enough to have you conjuring up dark matter and such wankology? Me again. And don't get me started on that incident when you were 16. You know the one. Yea, not so loud now eh, Dicky boy? Omnipotent is little old me and I have a pretty damn good pan dimensional memory goin on too. Now feck off. Me and Steve are having a pint and an argument about the conservation of information at the point of a singularity. I'm gonna blow his head in a minute when I tell him singularities don't exist.... More to the point we were both in Star Trek. Were you? No. Didn't think so. Amateur.

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



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    #50
    philologos
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,479 ✭✭✭✭philologos


    I'm touched, but I wouldn't be "fighting" modern science to begin with! :pac:


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    #51
    mcmoustache
    Registered Users Posts: 7,236 ✭✭✭mcmoustache


    ejmaztec wrote: »
    So you decided against the atheist gun?:P Good choice.

    Anyway, in your revised scenario, you're forgetting God, who will transmorph into a water-soaked spongue, drowning Dawkins at the end of the next round.

    Atheist gun? That doesn't make any sense.....


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    #52
    Pace2008
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,587 ✭✭✭Pace2008


    Judging by Jakkass's demeanor on Boards I'd say he'd be one to turn the other cheek. Tag in that hardcore Catholic bloke who gets banned and re-reg's all the time, it seems like he's spoiling for a fight with the world in general.

    Dawkins's good at science'n'stuff, but I reckon my little sister could hook him around.


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    #53
    johnmcdnl
    Registered Users Posts: 3,739 ✭✭✭johnmcdnl


    cough cough cough it'd be a W/O :P


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    #54
    sponsoredwalk
    Registered Users Posts: 3,038 ✭✭✭sponsoredwalk


    bluewolf wrote: »
    I don't understand why everyone calls him Stephen Hawkins instead of Hawking :confused:

    F'ing hilarious when you read Hawking write about all the letters addressed to Mr. Hawkins explaining to him why general relativity & QM are wrong :p

    As for the fight, we all know it would just end up looking something like this in some way or another.


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    #55
    scientific1982
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,562 ✭✭✭scientific1982


    2 on ones not very fair see as god doesnt exist.


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    #56
    Pace2008
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,587 ✭✭✭Pace2008


    scientific1982 wrote: »
    2 on ones not very fair see as god doesnt exist.
    It's very likely you're right, but for once can we not all just suspend our disbelief and have a joke together on an obviously light-hearted thread?


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