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Search for BM through Agency

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  • 13-08-2010 12:54pm
    #1
    Mammyof2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23 ✭


    Hi,

    I would appreciate any advice adopted in 1975, I have been to the agency and they have just initiated a search for the BM, in your experience if the BM has not registered or initated a search does that mean they would not be open to contact. Has anybody found their BM through this method and how long did it take.

    Many thanks.


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    #2
    kathy finn
    Registered Users Posts: 324 ✭✭kathy finn


    hi, i went through cunamh with my search for my birthmum. i started the search and my mothers name was not on the contact register. it took nearly a year from my first meeting with my social worker to find out she had passed away in 1994. i kept intouch with my social worker often over the year and she always explained how she was coming on in the search. she did find my birthmothers sisters and my birthdad for me. my advice is to keep intouch with your social worker and don,t be afraid to ask anything your not sure of remember they ar working for u.. hope this helps kathy


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    #3
    tyview
    Registered Users Posts: 210 ✭✭tyview


    Hi mammyof2,

    I've been through the HSE as my agency had closed. I had my first meeting about a month ago and they said it could take a while. They sent me a copy of my non identifying information last thursday morning in the post, two hours later the social worker rang me to say she's found BM. BM was delighted to hear I was OK. She also said she did enquire about tracing some time ago but was put off by something she saw or heard from an adoptee who said that they would hate their BM to search for them. I know I wouldn't have been like that but that put her off.

    My BM wasn't on the contact register either so it doesn't have to mean that they don't want contact. They may be just as afraid of rejection as we are!


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    #4
    Ostrom
    Registered Users Posts: 3,483 ✭✭✭Ostrom


    Hey, i went through the HSE, and also did my own trace whilst waiting. She maintained contact with the agency over the years and so was contactable within a few months of my inquiring - i seem to have been much more fortunate in this respect.


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    #5
    Mammyof2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23 ✭Mammyof2


    Hi All,

    Thanks so much for your responses.

    KathyFinn, I am so sorry you never got to meet your BM.

    Tyview - hope it goes well for you, have you had any contact yet?


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    #6
    tyview
    Registered Users Posts: 210 ✭✭tyview


    Mammyof2 wrote: »
    Hi All,

    Thanks so much for your responses.

    KathyFinn, I am so sorry you never got to meet your BM.

    Tyview - hope it goes well for you, have you had any contact yet?


    Hi, Ive written my first letter to her but she'd probably only be getting it in todays post. The SW forwarded it on to her so fingers crossed I hear back about this time next week.


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