Why is AH so misogynistic?

Nodin · 15-09-2010 9:49pm

Kimia wrote: »

Well, yea. Did you read the sexual harassment thread?

You'll pardon me quoting myself when I say

I don't read every thread

Thats one thread. And a recent one.

Kimia wrote: »

I think the point people are making is that it's constantly happening, so much so that it's hard to make a point as a women in these gender debates without being shouted down, just because you're a woman.

"Constantly happening" so much that nobody reports the posts and that a good number of us who wouldn't approve of that kind of thing haven't noticed it as a phenomena at all.....

AckwelFoley · 15-09-2010 9:50pm

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

they've been so comfortably in the lad majority their whole lives. But cheers to the ones who do, the noble souls.

Really, did you ever have to pay a mans rate on car insurance, yet ive never had an accident in my life

Have you ever walked by another woman and notice the subtle clenching of their handbag because i might rob her

Ths is no lie - without fail almost every time i go to the nightclub Ive had women, pull my shirt up, pinch my arse and do things that if a man did it to a woman he would get a slap in the face for..

So, if these things happened to women its sexism, if it happens to a guy he's a pussy for bringing it up

liah · 15-09-2010 9:50pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

Class joke.

And that's the rub. Some people find some things funny, others don't.

What makes it funny, though? Genuine question.

Wibbs · 15-09-2010 9:50pm

Why? Tradition and demographics. Across the site. Mostly men until very recently. Users and mods. Both have changed for the better on that score. In AH mostly younger guys for the most part. [AH answer]men who can't get laid or who have gotten laid by the wrong woman and bitch and moan over their choices.[/AH answer]

I'll say this and coming from a pretty unreconstructed man, I do feel uncomfortable with some stuff said. I've reported it from time to time. Not just here. Someone earlier mentioned Humanities as if it doesnt happen there and lo and behold I reported an example of OTT thinking regarding women there this very day. When I was modding PI/RI I was right píssed off with the PUA nonsense and its attendant misogyny and we clamped down on that guff pretty quickly. We get similar guff in the Ladies lounge. Funny the mods in the Gentlemans club get far less guff from women who post there. Doesnt sit well on my gender on that score alone. A lot of it is peer acceptance and fear. More the latter. if you have the fear, the one easy way to deal with the fear is attack and better in numbers.

TheZohanS · 15-09-2010 9:50pm

Dr. Zeus wrote: »

It's called irony dude

Ah irony.

So does this mean you're finally starting to get it, dude?

liah · 15-09-2010 9:51pm

snyper wrote: »

Really, did you ever have to pay a mans rate on car insurance, yet ive never had an accident in my life

Have you ever walked by another woman and notice the subtle clenching of their handbag because i might rob her

Ths is no lie - without fail almost every time i go to the nightclub Ive had women, pull my shirt up, pinch my arse and do things that if a man did it to a woman he would get a slap in the face for..

So, if these things happened to women its sexism, if it happens to a guy he's a pussy for bringing it up

Really? I don't usually see anything but support for men from boards women on those subjects. Certainly never seen anyone get called a pussy for bringing them up! Have you a link?

fonecrusher1 · 15-09-2010 9:52pm

Ive said it earlier i'l say it again.

An overly-modded After Hours is a scarey thought. Doomed i tells ya.

Boards would lose an awful lot members if it went down that road. Practically half the people who visit boards only come here for AH.:pac:

starbelgrade · 15-09-2010 9:52pm

liah wrote: »

What makes it funny, though? Genuine question.

You want to know why the joke is funny, or why I found it funny?

Dr. Zeus · 15-09-2010 9:52pm

TheZohan wrote: »

Ah irony.

So does this mean you're finally starting to get it, dude?

No

Catari Jaguar · 15-09-2010 9:53pm

Nodin, we get it you don't think there's sexism / misogyny in AH. Doesn't mean there isn't. Maybe you don't know what it is?

But considering how the comments are about & aimed at women, obviously it would be women that notice it and have a problem with it. And they do.. So it is there.

Jokes to you aren't jokes to everyone. And if I can't tell racist jokes then why be allowed tell anti-women ones? I'm sure women are very sorry to let equality and stuff kill your buzz.

This goes beyond jokes, and into the most petty comments like if a girl poster says something about a woman the response given to her is "STFU, you're bitter cos she's hotter than you". WTF! And the "Yea, I'd do her" is getting very old. How many babes of RTE threads are there now?

I know girls inc me that picked gender neutral names on purpose to avoid being single out as Dudess and Liah clearly are on this thread.

liah · 15-09-2010 9:55pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

You want to know why the joke is funny, or why I found it funny?

Well, both. I mean, I've found sexist jokes funny, but I've always had trouble figuring out exactly why, other than that it's just a common thing to be joked about and therefore it's supposed to be funny. Conditioning, maybe? I don't really know. I just think it's interesting to see if anyone has ever actually thought about why they find that stuff so hilarious.

Kimia · 15-09-2010 9:56pm

snyper wrote: »

Really, did you ever have to pay a mans rate on car insurance, yet ive never had an accident in my life

Have you ever walked by another woman and notice the subtle clenching of their handbag because i might rob her

Ths is no lie - without fail almost every time i go to the nightclub Ive had women, pull my shirt up, pinch my arse and do things that if a man did it to a woman he would get a slap in the face for..

So, if these things happened to women its sexism, if it happens to a guy he's a pussy for bringing it up

I have said this so many times. Why is it a competition? I could list out a few negative things that happen to me because of my gender too, but why bother?

I think it's awful that there's double standards but to be honest, who's calling you a pussy for bringing it up? Not women.

midlandsmissus · 15-09-2010 9:57pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

You want to know why the joke is funny, or why I found it funny?

No...I'd be wondering more along the lines of why it's still funny after the hundreth time it's said?

Repace couch with any other word and it's the same joke OVER and OVER and OVER!

AnnyHallsal · 15-09-2010 9:59pm

That "legend" thread about the poor girl who fainted on the Luas and wasn't wearing underwear .. some of the jokes on that thread were horrendous. I don't think they should have been censored. But a moderating voice could have pointed out that maybe the prospect of filming or sexually assaulting an unconscious woman isn't all that funny.

Celly Smunt · 15-09-2010 10:00pm

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

That "legend" thread about the poor girl who fainted on the Luas and wasn't wearing underwar .. some of the jokes on that thread were horrendous. I don't think they should have been censored. But a moderating voice could have pointed out that maybe the prospect of filming or sexually assaulting an unconscious woman isn't all that funny.

it was the dart tut.

starbelgrade · 15-09-2010 10:01pm

liah wrote: »

Well, both. I mean, I've found sexist jokes funny, but I've always had trouble figuring out exactly why, other than that it's just a common thing to be joked about and therefore it's supposed to be funny. Conditioning, maybe? I don't really know. I just think it's interesting to see if anyone has ever actually thought about why they find that stuff so hilarious.

I don't think there's much to be gained from over analysing jokes. Some sexist jokes are funny, others aren't - the funny ones are usually funny because in some way they are actually true & therefor aren't really sexist, but just observational.. that particular one was a witty re-work of an old joke, in response to a post. It was more situationally funny than stand-alone funny.

Anyway, it made me smile & it was light hearted.

Nodin · 15-09-2010 10:02pm

cherub rock wrote: »

Nodin, we get it you don't think there's sexism / misogyny in AH. Doesn't mean there isn't.

O I'm sure it occurs. What I question is the frequency.

Prof.Badass · 15-09-2010 10:02pm

cherub rock wrote: »

Wtf is wrong with society?

A huge proportion of men are bitter towards women, although they may not ever admit it (heck, some of them might not even realise it). I know this because growing up I was one of them.

Without going into a whole rant about all the unfair treatment men recieve, i will just give the main example;

Let's propose a man is lucky enough to become a father, and lets assume he is lucky enough to be married to the mother (as then he has some rights to his child). From then on he is at the mercy of this woman. The law gives her the power to take away his children (at a whim) aswell as a good chunk of his wealth (now he does have some rights, but that's not the point). If he's not married, then how much of HIS children he gets to see is COMPLETELY up to the woman. Now, most women aren't 100% pure evil, so most men might manage avoid a worst case scenario, but that's not the point. The point is that the woman has this power to destroy a man's happiness, a prospect which many young men find frightening.

Think about this for a second. She has this enormous power over him, while he is completely powerless. Now this isn't some "oh that will never happen" scenario. Family breakdown is quite common in Ireland and any guy with half a brain will realise there's a good chance it will happen to him in the future.

A lot of guys might like to pretend they don't care for children, but in reality most people want to reproduce someday, and if they're a half-way decent person they'll want to raise their children too.

Is it right for young men feel such hidden bitterment towards women?
No, it's not.
But it is understandable that some do.

cherub rock wrote: »

Wtf is wrong with society?

Attempt 2.

Irish people are ****ed up when it comes to gender relations. Both men and women feel resentment towards the opposite sex. This is because
1. A culture that doesn't embrace equality, it instead forces sexist stereotypes on people (especially boys/girls) which breeds resentment.
2. High levels of gender segregation in children/adolescents leads to a less than satisfactory level of familliarity and understanding between the sexes, which has knock on effects.

I remember reading a thread on sex and intelligence (started by a female poster actually) which had basically rapidly descended into a good old fashioned battle of the sexes. Each time a female poster made a put down it annoyed me but each time a male poster put down women, it didn't even make me feel good, it just made me feel relieved. T'would have been better not to start the thread at all.

I don't care if there are differences between the sexes, society would be vastly better off if we didn't have to deal with any of this shit. That's why gender equality is the only option.

cherub rock wrote: »

Wtf is wrong with society?

Attempt 3.

Boards has a male majority so misogyny tends to win out over misandry.

Dionysus · 15-09-2010 10:02pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

Class joke.

And that's the rub. Some people find some things funny, others don't.

I found it funny, but that very fact highlighted, for me, why it was wrong (if you understand).

If we had some battle between misogynist and misandrist threads all of this might be acceptable, and very probably great craic. We don't and as such it is not right that women are the recipients of so many sexist "jokes" which have the effect of deriding women in a wide variety of areas of life. The fact that women don't react with similar threads against men makes me, as a guy, feel that it's not something they wish to "joke" about. We should accept that perspective rather than say they need to get a sense of humour.

As such, respect would be better served by After Hours mods trying to empathise with how women, and many men, might view such posts. 'Respect' for people should, in my view, determine the acceptability of posts here.

AckwelFoley · 15-09-2010 10:03pm

liah wrote: »

Really? I don't usually see anything but support for men from boards women on those subjects. Certainly never seen anyone get called a pussy for bringing them up! Have you a link?

It was in response to your comment that we men are sheltered in our lads enviroment our "whole lives" therefore taking it out of the AH context

Kimia wrote: »

I have said this so many times. Why is it a competition? I could list out a few negative things that happen to me because of my gender too, but why bother?

I think it's awful that there's double standards but to be honest, who's calling you a pussy for bringing it up? Not women.

No, not a competition, but if you are going to complain about men, can i not tell you that this sexism you speak of is not exclusive to women?

AnnyHallsal · 15-09-2010 10:05pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

Some sexist jokes are funny, others aren't - the funny ones are usually funny because in some way they are actually true & therefor aren't really sexist, but just observational..

Anyway, it made me smile & it was light hearted.

How much of the sexism is true? Maybe this is what makes some of the female posters a little uncomfortable. That this is everywhere on Boards would seem to suggest that it is believed to be to some extent true. And the more it's repeated the truer it seems, til posters don't notice it at all.

Celly Smunt · 15-09-2010 10:08pm

i haven't read all the posts over the last few pages because i'm lazy but my opinion on what i think is going on is that,nobody has the right to give out about anyones sense of humour,a sense of humour is part of a person just like a nose for instance,therefore i feel no matter what the topic,if somebody finds it funny they're perfectly entitled to laugh or thank posts and reply in this instance,anybody who judges somebody else because of their sense of humour is an idiot.

i'm am probably totally out of context

starbelgrade · 15-09-2010 10:09pm

Dionysus wrote: »

I found it funny, but that very fact highlighted, for me, why it was wrong (if you understand).

I honestly don't believe that there is such a thing as "right" or "wrong" when it comes to the written word, be it jokes, books, articles etc. There is just weel written, or badly written.

I agree with much of the rest of your post, though I have to admit that I haven't noticed misogony being rampant in AH. Possibly because if it is, it doesn't affect me & if there's misanymy (or whatever it's called) from female posters, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Kimia · 15-09-2010 10:09pm

snyper wrote: »

It was in response to your comment that we men are sheltered in our lads enviroment our "whole lives" therefore taking it out of the AH context

No, not a competition, but if you are going to complain about men, can i not tell you that this sexism you speak of is not exclusive to women?

What's your point though? I mean, yes of course, sexism is not exclusive to women. Absolutely agree with you. But this thread is about the overwhelming misogyny in AH and how female posters are shouted down or made to feel unwelcome due to their gender. We're not talking about IRL here, we're talking about AH and how women's posts are treated. I mean, I could just counter with how I can't smile at a man in a pub without him thinking I want to have sex with him (and if I do have sex with him I'm a slut, but if I don't have sex with him I'm a tease) but if I look at a man and don't smile, I am a bítch (and possibly a lesbian, frigid, icequeen).

And round and round it goes.

Catari Jaguar · 15-09-2010 10:09pm

Nodin wrote: »

O I'm sure it occurs. What I question is the frequency.

A thread called "Butter faces" opened a half an hour ago. Recent enough?

midlandsmissus · 15-09-2010 10:10pm

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

That "legend" thread about the poor girl who fainted on the Luas and wasn't wearing underwar .. some of the jokes on that thread were horrendous. I don't think they should have been censored. But a moderating voice could have pointed out that maybe the prospect of filming or sexually assaulting an unconscious woman isn't all that funny.

I actually found that thread horrendous, but you know with so many people liking it and thinking it hilarious I just didn't know what to do.

It's hard to stand up against the majority, and I'm really grateful that there are some mods listening to us at last.

It really is getting very bad mods, I don't find that 'get back in the kitchen' joke bad in itself, but when it is said after every post you make, and then you're completely ignored, and only the male posters are listened to, it's too far!

for a start there should be more femle moderators, there is only one at the mo am I correct?

AckwelFoley · 15-09-2010 10:10pm

cherub rock wrote: »

A thread called "Butter faces" opened a half an hour ago. Recent enough?

so?

Women dont pick men on looks?

Celly Smunt · 15-09-2010 10:11pm

snyper wrote: »

so?

Women dont pick men on looks?

just the wallet?

midlandsmissus · 15-09-2010 10:12pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

I honestly don't believe that there is such a thing as "right" or "wrong" when it comes to the written word, be it jokes, books, articles etc. There is just weel written, or badly written.

I agree with much of the rest of your post, though I have to admit that I haven't noticed misogony being rampant in AH. Possibly because if it is, it doesn't affect me & if there's misanymy (or whatever it's called) from female posters, it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

Amazing how the 'he drives she dies' had the male posters on here up in arms though...you notice it alright when it's directed at yourself.

AnnyHallsal · 15-09-2010 10:12pm

starbelgrade wrote: »

I have to admit that I haven't noticed misogony being rampant in AH. Possibly because if it is, it doesn't affect me ..

Exactly, so to the male majority there's no problem and the women should just shut up ..

Why is AH so misogynistic?

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