Stories of Gardaí being useless.

Sofa King Great

dilallio wrote: »

GOING to bed the other night, I noticed
people in my shed stealing things.
I phoned the gardai but was told
no one was in the area to help.
They said they would send someone
over as soon as possible.
I hung up. A minute later, I rang again.
‘Hello,’ I said, ‘I called you a minute ago
because there were people in my shed.
You don’t have to hurry now, because I’ve shot them.’
Within minutes there were half a dozen
squad cars in the area, plus the garda helicopter
and the emergency response unit.
They caught the burglars red-handed.
One of the gardai said:
‘I thought you said you’d shot them’
To which I replied:
‘I thought you said there was no one available.’


Then again, it might have been just a dream ...

I realise this was just copied and pasted but the writer assumes that the ERU and he helicopter should turn out to a shed being robbed

nibtrix

Raquel Obnoxious Coupon wrote: »

Maybe because there is no 'four courts' garda station?.

harcourt maybe??

lord lucan

nibtrix wrote: »

harcourt maybe??

Probably the Bridewell i'd imagine.

FouxDaFaFa

About 15 years ago when my Dad was working in a bank in Waterford the bank was held up by members of the INLA. They didn't hurt anyone but waved some guns around and tied the employees up while taking the money. One of the workers triggered an alarm which alerted the Gardaí and sure enough they were there in minutes, breaking down the door. OF THE WRONG BANK.

By the time they got to the actual crime scene the employees had managed to free themselves and were just sitting around, possibly playing "Stop the bus" or something.

ILA

THFC wrote: »

Only problem with the Gaurdai is that some of them are power-hungry assholes who look for any excuse to arrest yeh.

Video or GTFO!

[bout 15 years ago when my Dad was working in a bank in Waterford the bank was held up by members of the INLA.

When did the INLA rob a bank in Waterford in 1995, or for that matter, rob a bank at all? They're usually the least bank robbery orientated physical force republican group out there so I'm very curious as to whether you can verify this event, and therefore, your anecdote.

Cheeky_gal

ILA wrote: »

Video or GTFO!

When did the INLA rob a bank in Waterford in 1995, or for that matter, rob a bank at all? They're usually the least bank robbery orientated physical force republican group out there so I'm very curious as to whether you can verify this event, and therefore, your anecdote.

Your name is I-N-L-A and you're complaining about the I-L-A.

Ooooh me smells a criminal :P

FouxDaFaFa

ILA wrote: »

Video or GTFO!

When did the INLA rob a bank in Waterford in 1995, or for that matter, rob a bank at all? They're usually the least bank robbery orientated physical force republican group out there so I'm very curious as to whether you can verify this event, and therefore, your anecdote.

They didn't rob it as an organisation, but some of them were members. I also didn't say '95 specifically, all I know is I was young at the time. Early 90s.
I will interrogate my father the next time I see him if you wish!;)

kylith

Raquel Obnoxious Coupon wrote: »

Maybe because there is no 'four courts' garda station?.

nibtrix wrote: »

harcourt maybe??

Nope, not Harcourt.
I can't remember the name of it, but it's close to the Four Courts

*google*

Bridewell, probably.

Corsendonk

Its shooting season! why would you call them to ruin the fun!

kylith

FouxDaFaFa wrote: »

They didn't rob it as an organisation, but some of them were members. I also didn't say '95 specifically, all I know is I was young at the time. Early 90s.
I will interrogate my father the next time I see him if you wish!;)

Was that the bank in Ardkeen by any chance?

ILA

FouxDaFaFa wrote: »

They didn't rob it as an organisation, but some of them were members. I also didn't say '95 specifically, all I know is I was young at the time. Early 90s.
I will interrogate my father the next time I see him if you wish!;)

Ah well it's just that it's an important difference which often gets lost in media reports and discussions with the effect than an organisation is tarnished by the acts of individuals operating outside their remit.

wolfpawnat

I was on a night out in a West Clare seaside town one night. Left the night club, 2 fellas beating the living daylights out of each other on the footpath, two male gardaí walk down the street............ and step off the footpath to get around them and continue walking! no joke! The Garda van was apparently full and drving a few to the nearest open barracks and the 2 didnt want to have to deal with the ladds and remain near the nightclub til the van came back!!!

That said as a youngster, my dog was hit and killed by a car, a garda took me and my dog (dog wrapped in a blanket) and drove us home! V nice of him!

MagicSean

FouxDaFaFa wrote: »

About 15 years ago when my Dad was working in a bank in Waterford the bank was held up by members of the INLA. They didn't hurt anyone but waved some guns around and tied the employees up while taking the money. One of the workers triggered an alarm which alerted the Gardaí and sure enough they were there in minutes, breaking down the door. OF THE WRONG BANK.

By the time they got to the actual crime scene the employees had managed to free themselves and were just sitting around, possibly playing "Stop the bus" or something.

Surely that is the alarm companies fault. The panic button doesn't go straight to the station. It's like chinese whispers with those systems.

Noodleworm

Unfortunately my local gardai are NEVER in the station. I've ben trying to get an age card off then for over a year now. The station in the town refuses to do it, saying it has to be the little village station near me that does it. I live near a ferry port where a lot of drugs have been found so I assume thats where they always are.

Any interaction I've had with them, they are nice people doing there job. It just annoys me how fussy they are about what station you go too.

DoneDL

Got stopped yesterday morning by a cocky young guard who said "you were doing 140km in a 100km zone", I said "no I wasn't , that van couldn't do 140km". He them insists on searching the interior, so I said " you need a warrant", He says "No I don't". I said "Anyway there's a body in the back, and a gun in the front but there not mine because I stole the van". He gets on the radio, 15 minutes later a carload of serious looking lads with machine pistols show up. "Wheres the body" asks the sergeant, "What body " says I. "This guard says that there's a body in the back", "Oh **** off" says I "next thing he'll be telling you I was doing 140km in a 100km zone"

FouxDaFaFa

ILA wrote: »

Ah well it's just that it's an important difference which often gets lost in media reports and discussions with the effect than an organisation is tarnished by the acts of individuals operating outside their remit.

According to Dad, Dominic McGlinchey was one of the men involved.

kylith wrote: »

Was that the bank in Ardkeen by any chance?

Turns out it was actually Wexford, not Waterford! Geography has never been my strong point.

30H!3

DoneDL wrote: »

Got stopped yesterday morning by a cocky young guard who said "you were doing 140km in a 100km zone", I said "no I wasn't , that van couldn't do 140km". He them insists on searching the interior, so I said " you need a warrant", He says "No I don't". I said "Anyway there's a body in the back, and a gun in the front but there not mine because I stole the van". He gets on the radio, 15 minutes later a carload of serious looking lads with machine pistols show up. "Wheres the body" asks the sergeant, "What body " says I. "This guard says that there's a body in the back", "Oh **** off" says I "next thing he'll be telling you I was doing 140km in a 100km zone"

And then you woke up?

Kimono-Girl

DoneDL wrote: »

Got stopped yesterday morning by a cocky young guard who said "you were doing 140km in a 100km zone", I said "no I wasn't , that van couldn't do 140km". He them insists on searching the interior, so I said " you need a warrant", He says "No I don't". I said "Anyway there's a body in the back, and a gun in the front but there not mine because I stole the van". He gets on the radio, 15 minutes later a carload of serious looking lads with machine pistols show up. "Wheres the body" asks the sergeant, "What body " says I. "This guard says that there's a body in the back", "Oh **** off" says I "next thing he'll be telling you I was doing 140km in a 100km zone"

poor you, have you 99 problems?

Chuchoter

I used to get a lift home with a girl who's Dad was a gardai. He drove at high speeds down a very windy road, full of speed bumps ON HIS MOBILE!!!! I thought I was going to die.

prinz

DoneDL wrote: »

"This guard says that there's a body in the back", "Oh **** off" says I "next thing he'll be telling you I was doing 140km in a 100km zone"

That's a poor version of that joke.

mikemac

You live in Meath OP

There could be two squad cars expected to cover a huge area of the county.
Call the gardai and the nearest squad car might be 20km away

CorkMan

One night I was going to sleep,
I was lying in my bed falling off,
I heard a big bang in back garden,
I immediately rang the gardaí,
they said they'd send out a unit immediately,
I waited 5 minutes with my brush in hand,
they didn't show up so I went outside,
then let out a very big sigh,
I saw a witch cooking up some magic,
then the police arrived and put her in the wagon.

This is not a dream, she is still being processed ATM.

Jonesy101

A taxi driver friend of mine was parked in a rank in Dublin city center. While there a Gard as the usually do ask them a couple questions and look at there license etc. Everything was alright so the Gard having nothing better to do informed him that he could "do him" for not being clean shaven. Said its against the law for a taxi driver to have stubble. So said taxi driver asked what if he was growing a beard as theyre not illegal. Gard said "well that is a grey area". What the hells that about?

Six Gards came into my hotel last night as I work on reception, it mustve been a prank call or something, they went on their way. Its reassuring to know theyre there in case of some trouble in the hotel.

talla10

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I was on a night out in a West Clare seaside town one night. Left the night club, 2 fellas beating the living daylights out of each other on the footpath, two male gardaí walk down the street............ and step off the footpath to get around them and continue walking! no joke! The Garda van was apparently full and drving a few to the nearest open barracks and the 2 didnt want to have to deal with the ladds and remain near the nightclub til the van came back!!!

dont believe this for a second!!

deisedave

FouxDaFaFa wrote: »

They didn't rob it as an organisation, but some of them were members. I also didn't say '95 specifically, all I know is I was young at the time. Early 90s.
I will interrogate my father the next time I see him if you wish!;)

Being from Waterford I know this happend, I think it was the bank in Lisduggan your talking about.

deisedave

talla10 wrote: »

dont believe this for a second!!

I live next to a night club unfortunately and I have seen this happen with people fighting and guards ignoring it quite a few times.

On another note, From my view alot of guards can be very hostile towards young males for no reason, I have had a few dealings with them and was harassed searched and told lies. When I complained about what had happened there was no record of me ever having any dealings with any gardai.
But thats tends to be by the younger male gardai, Most of the cops are grand and do there best to help and make the country better.

RockinRolla

Garda gave drunk guy keys to a new car just so he could sleep.

/thread.

AckwelFoley

Lets not paint all members of our esteemed force with the one brush.

There are arseholes in all cross sections of society

Lets look at some of their good work

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCznvywH9G4

m.j.w

Girlfriend works in a shop, they were robbed (her purse and some goods were taken). Gaurds were called and they showed them the cctv and it was done by romainians. The gaurd said "no point trying to look for them, we will never find them"

lynski

talla10 wrote: »

dont believe this for a second!!

i do! they are constantly over stretched and have to ignore stuff.
we watched a guy high on angel dust going ballistic on the main street of a small town one night, breaking windows on houses and cars, terrorising a half dozen elderly people in their homes. He spent 20 minutes head-butting a plateglass window trying to break it, until he did. 40 minutes or more of this guy going wild.
The local station, which was one of the windows he broke, was closed. all gone home for the night. we were on the phone to 999 4/5 times panicked in case he came to our house as he had it in for my dad. we were told they were on their way from next town 10 mins away. after 30 mins we called the lads mother and she and her bf came down and get him and took him to hospital. the guards arrived over an hr after first call. never charged him, did not talk to the terrorised old folks, nothing. we ended up with 6 shaky pensioners in our kitchen for a few hours. the butcher whose window went in sold up and retired as a result.
There are members of the travelling community in the town who are driving new land rovers at 15! said it to one of them one night in the pub and he said sure i have all the papers to prove i am over 18, wink wink. i know how old they are and i have not lived there for 20 yrs, and the guards dont? yeah right.
on a personal level, i have had mostly good experiences dealing with them tho, just hate the lazy ones who cant be bothered dealing with anti-social behavior of certain members of the community