This one guy is an asshole - being led on!

AnnyHallsal

Two signs you're an asshole:

1. You suggest being f*ck buddies on a first date
2. You say "Why did you wear red if you weren't going to f*ck me?"

Not sexist. True.

bonerm

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

Sounds like the best solution tbh. Be sure to post pix if you go down this route.

Saibh

The difference I see is you fancied him for 5 years, he didn't seem to.

Where you expecting him to feel the same way towards you once you decided to do something about it?

Jesus Wept

Perhaps he felt it was time to move things along considering the first phase of your relationship (exchanging numbers) took 5-6 years.

OutlawPete

Slight generalization with the thread title, but no bother.

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him then ..

So, you knew him for five or six years as you worked with him, carry on ..

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips. He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Sounds like he was sussing out if a threesome was on the cards.

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages.

Well, seen as you knew him for years, it's my guess that you were attracted to him as he's a bit of a bastard, but now that he has treated you badly, you blame him.

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal.

Bastard.

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

What does he want?

To shag you with your flatmates I would say.

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Sersiously i understand dogs more.

Look, bastards turn you on, don't complain then when they turn around and act like one.

What you want to do is try and be attracted to nice guys who treat women well.

Course, 'sexy bastard' has a better ring to it that 'sexy nice guy'.

Gran Hermano

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

How can i give it to him when he wasn't coming for it?

Try not to scare him. Would donning a balaclava or brown paper bag assist?

TheZohanS

Sardonicat wrote: »

Was in no way trying to imply that all guys behave like this.

Cool

From what I could infer from the OP's post, IMO, this guy was just taking the piss.

People have the right to change their minds, maybe the OP did something to turn the guy off, we'll never know as we weren't there.

Just because you go on a date with someone doesn't mean that there has to be a second, the guy might well have been taking the piss, but again we'll never know.

I do not think that "men are assholes". I've been equally critical of women in other posts in relation to their behaviour towards boyfriends/exes

Cool.

Sardonicat

[QUOTE=TheZohan;68130105



People have the right to change their minds, maybe the OP did something to turn the guy off, we'll never know as we weren't there.

Just because you go on a date with someone doesn't mean that there has to be a second, the guy might well have been taking the piss, but again we'll never know.



[/QUOTE]

Am agreeing with you 100%. Was just giving my take on it. OP posted so that she could get various opinions. I also suggested that she may have had a bit of a fantasy thing going on.Fancying someone for 5-6 yrs aint healthy imo.

Sardonicat

sorry bout the messy post ^^^

AlmightyCushion

Roro4Brit wrote: »

Can't they just stfu and get their tits out, that way everyone is happy.

I bet the ladies all love you. I reckon you should take your own advice. The STFU part not the getting the tits out part.

Super-Rush

Popcorn anyone?

poisonated

Ok I'm not sure how much of this new but...

1)You are in after hours, if you wan't to have a serious discussion go to personal issues.

and

2) Don't tar all men with the same brush. I am a guy and I don't play these stupid games. It's not just men that do it, it's women aswell. I look at people doing this sh.ite and I really can't understand their motivation.

AlmightyCushion

super-rush wrote: »

Popcorn anyone?

I'd much rather some cop porn.

Prof.Badass

OP, may i suggest that perhaps you are inexperienced with men?


First of all, if he was single and you fancied him, you kept those feelings to yourself without trying anything for 5 YEARS :eek:!!! I mean, you should have been able to worm your way in there somewhere without saying it outright over those 5 years. At least if he dumped you after 1 year you'd have closure and could move on.

But most importantly, i think you might have scared him off. How many times did you call/text him exactly? Have you been single for long? I'm jumping to conclusions here, but if i'm correct he probably was initally somewhat into you, but with all your excitement you came across as kinda desperate and it made him think there must be something wrong with you. It's not uncommon for people to unknowingly sabotage themselves in this way, especially if they've been single for a long time and it's their first proper chance.

I have a friend who basically destroyed what chance he had with a girl by giving her 27 missed calls over a weekend when she didn't reply to a text :eek:. It was kinda funny , but also kinda sad too . I know you might feel excited, but you have to be able to play it cool sometimes .

No point crying over spilt milk though. Life is a learning experience.

me_right_one

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips.

He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages. Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal. Yes it was when he asked to come into my room.

What does he want? Sersiously i understand dogs more. And before anyone says women can be assholes too, yes i know they can. Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

He wants a ride woman. Lets get this straight:

1) You made the move on him
2) You gave him your number
3) He thinks, "Hmmm, a vaginafied human has shown an interest in me. Perhaps we can both benefit from this transaction. She obviously wants my cockadoodledoo or she wouldnt have persued me, perhaps I'll oblige and we're both happy!
4) He asks is it ok to, ahem, "go up to your room", with your flatmates around. He didnt mean to check out your wallpaper!!!!!!!!
5) You dont say what happened next, but you obviously rejected him.
6) He thinks, "She persued me, then rejected me. What does she want? I understand dogs more!!!!"

YA SEE?

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

This Dublin musician fella you might have seen on the telly once contacted me through a social networking site. I .. ahem .. reluctantly gave him my number. His first message was, I sh*t you not, "Do you live alone?"

Your guy sounds a lot like him.

He sounds nothing like him. The OP went after the fella, not the other way round. Said fella even had the consideration to think of the flatmates!

Sardonicat wrote: »

He wanted to get his ego boosted. You boosted it. Now he's moved on.

Why do some women have this fascination with ego? He wanted his hole, nothing to do with ego:mad:

Sardonicat wrote: »

Was in no way trying to imply that all guys behave like this. From what I could infer from the OP's post, IMO, this guy was just taking the piss.

:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: How on Earth was HE taking the piss? OP instigated proceedings, when he agreed and suggested jiggy, she pushed him away! WTF like? Did she just want to have a little tea party with him?

Sound Bite

AAARRRGH!

According to boards lately, all men are lying, cheating bastards who just want a quick shag & all women are prick teasing, drink stealing, gold diggers who belong in the kitchen. Who knows why we bother will each other at all?


One man didnt fancy ya thats all. Sounds like he was after a quick shag, possibly even more but when you hounded him with text messages, he decided you were more trouble than you were worth.

(PS - if you want tea & sympathy go to PI not AH ).

AlmightyCushion

Sound Bite wrote: »

According to boards lately, all men are lying, cheating bastards who just want a quick shag & all women are prick teasing, drink stealing, gold diggers who belong in the kitchen. Who knows why we bother will each other at all?

Could be worse. We could be ginger or left handed.

bnt

Sound Bite wrote: »

AAARRRGH!
...
(PS - if you want tea & sympathy go to PI not AH ).

I recommended that the OP visit the "Relationship Issues" forum ... then I read a few posts there, and now I'm a bit depressed. I think she's better off here, to be honest.

Lia_lia

This thread is clearly bollox.



Or is she being serious?

clikityclak

Eh he was obviously looking for the ride and maybe thought you were too, then realised you weren't. He may be gone elsewhere to get his h0le.





also I'm a lady!

ballsymchugh

AnnyHallsal wrote: »

This Dublin musician fella you might have seen on the telly once contacted me through a social networking site. I .. ahem .. reluctantly gave him my number. His first message was, I sh*t you not, "Do you live alone?"

Your guy sounds a lot like him.

Christy Dignam? don't think he'll be doing much from the hospital bed anyway.

mikerowsopht

what ya need to do is call him over
be in yer room naked
when he comes in just say

"Just lob it in boss, none of dat fancy stuff"

you sound like a bit of a head-wrecker though tbh so that's prob why he's gone n legged it loike.

If you answer yes to any of the following question then they can also be put down to why he legged it:

Are you Fat?
Do you have Ginger hair?
Are you a troll
Do you look like and speak like Vicky Pollard
do you look like a man?
Do you have a moustache or beard?
extra facial, bube or armpit hair
do you have rolls
do you smell or sweat constantly

if you answer yes to any of the above questions then that's why

Chairman Meow

Men are assholes?

Yeah, well women are all snakes with tits.

orourkeda

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Why do they do it?

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him but since i left the job a couple of weeks ago, i thought fk it il try it anyway.

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips.

He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages. Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal. Yes it was when he asked to come into my room.

What does he want? Sersiously i understand dogs more. And before anyone says women can be assholes too, yes i know they can. Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

steak and a blow job.

Feeona

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him but since i left the job a couple of weeks ago, i thought fk it il try it anyway.

If you fancied him that much, you should have gone for it work or no work. You're after wasting 6 years of your life lusting after someone who doesn't feel the same way.
6 years you'll never get back

curlzy

:rolleyes: Men are not hard to understand, Women are not hard to understand. ASSHOLES are hard to understand (both genders). My advice, stop attracting assholes and start looking for men, you'll recognise them when you met one, they're awesome, they don't play mind games and generally are a hell of a lot of fun. And for god's sakes when you do encounter an asshole run away, don't ****ing internalise it and feel bad about it, do you want the assholes to win???? They do when you end up posting on boards whining about not being able to understand them, don't bother trying to understand them, it's a total waste of time, when someone show's you their assholey side (:D tee hee) RUN AWAY!!! And I'd say change your username, it seems to be a self fulfilling prophecy.

senordingdong

A/S/L?

Sanjuro

It's time for another episode of Good Idea, Bad Idea.

Good Idea- posting on a forum to get advice on an issue that affects your personal life.

Bad Idea- posting it in After Hours.

pickarooney

Can we get the director's cut of the first post? We seem to be missing, oh, just about all the pertinent facts.

starbelgrade

starbelgrade wrote: »

Worked with this bird for 5 years. Never paid that much attention to her, though she was always looking at me. Found it a bit weird, but didn't dwell on it too much.
.

Were you working in an aviary?

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Could be worse. We could be ginger or left handed.

starlit

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Why do they do it?

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him but since i left the job a couple of weeks ago, i thought fk it il try it anyway.

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips.

He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages. Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal. Yes it was when he asked to come into my room.

What does he want? Sersiously i understand dogs more. And before anyone says women can be assholes too, yes i know they can. Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

He wanted a bit of your gee and ride ya. Simple as that. A kiss doesn't always mean anything, to a guy it means its a quicker way to your knickers if he plays the nice, cool, sexy guy and plays his cards right. To girls well, a kiss is a kiss but not every kiss means something to girls, some just kiss guys like guys shag girls to get another notch on their bedpost in the case of girls its another notch on their belts. Then there are times that the chemistry and the spark can happen for girls when they kiss some guys so if that happens then well the girl is more likely to follow suit and cop of with the guy more easily.

Although he asked if the flat mates mind if he went into your room for a visit, well it wasn't just you and the room he wanted to visit it was your bed and hopped you would put out. Also to warn the flat mates if they would hear anything...If you didn't offer yourself on a plate and let him into your room even if it was just for a chat should it have mattered if things happened or not, it would have been a better way to find out than just hanging around waiting and not doing anything about it. 5-6 years is a long time you should have gone for it as soon as he asked you. Ye did knew each other it wasn't like ye were strangers?

Well, he is a bit of an eejit if he didn't reply and ignore your texts but some men are like that if they aren't entirely interested or lost interest or realised you weren't going to put out and more or less his thinking is why bother.

He wanted sex nothing more from what I gather from your post. Don't think he wanted anything serious if he did he would have pursued you until you gave in!

Ya I understand what you mean by 'dogs' they are loyal and friendly and can more or less tell you how they feel and tell you what they want by their behaviour and actions. If you like men then why become a lesbian? It might be easier said than done. If you went the bi-way maybe that might help ease your dislike of men acting like gombeens towards women. Best to stick with men, 'you can't live with them you can't live without them', true saying! I don't sympathise with 'your man' though. He is a player can't you see that? Best of without him and go for a nice lad that will treat you with more respect. Plenty more fish in the sea and plenty of talent and eye candy out there if you know where to look! You deserve a nice lad though every girl does. He is out there somewhere but try not to put it off so long without saying it to a lad 'I fancy you'. Best to know before any heartbreak and be able to test the waters before things ever get too serious between you and your beau!

Best of luck OP

OutlawPete

snuggles285 wrote: »

If you like men then why become a lesbian? It might be easier said than done.

Quite true, I went Lesbian once .. she didn't like me.

Plus, if HardLuckWoman did go lesbian and a woman treated her like that awful guy did in the OP did - I'm not so sure that a: 'Women are assholes' thread, would go down too well.

I say, stick to being heterosexual OP - your thread topics won't nearly be as limited

Orando Broom

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Why do they do it?

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him but since i left the job a couple of weeks ago, i thought fk it il try it anyway.

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips.

He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages. Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal. Yes it was when he asked to come into my room.

What does he want? Sersiously i understand dogs more. And before anyone says women can be assholes too, yes i know they can. Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

You sound a little bit stalk-y.

Have you/ had you a reputation in your job for following fellas? How many fellas have you gone out with?

Needy Girls get no lovin. FACT.

the purple tin

Your thread title made me think that you were calling men assholes for letting themselves be led on

Biggins

hondasam

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Why do they do it?

Fancied a guy for ages. 5 or 6 years to be precise. Didn't do anything cause i worked with him but since i left the job a couple of weeks ago, i thought fk it il try it anyway.

Gave him my number and he was more than happy to give me his and he went to kiss me on the lips.

He rang me a couple of times and even asked me would my flatmates mind if he came into my room if he came to visit me. Wtf does all this mean?

Am i right to be mad at him since he's all talk and he's been ignoring my messages. Even had the neck to tell me the kiss was no big deal. Yes it was when he asked to come into my room.

What does he want? Sersiously i understand dogs more. And before anyone says women can be assholes too, yes i know they can. Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

five or six years, you have waited this long, ye cant have much of an attraction for each other.

liah

Hah. :pac: It's a bit of a laugh to see more than a few men getting uppity and snarky about this, after all that moaning before about how if it happened to you you'd just ignore it.

Ah, ironing. Better get back to it.

hondasam

Orando Broom wrote: »

You sound a little bit stalk-y.

Have you/ had you a reputation in your job for following fellas? How many fellas have you gone out with?

Needy Girls get no lovin. FACT.[/QUOTE]

Apparently the get no sex either.

hobochris

Dudess wrote: »

So this one guy is representative of "men"? And he's not an asshole for not wanting the same as you want.

I'm afraid so, we voted him in at the last big meeting.

You know the way things go in this country though, once someone is voted in, they are very hard to get rid of, no matter how incompetent.

OutlawPete

liah wrote: »

Hah. :pac: It's a bit of a laugh to see more than a few men getting uppity and snarky about this, after all that moaning before about how if it happened to you you'd just ignore it.

Ah, ironing. Better get back to it.

Funny, in the other thread earlier when it was women being critised, you posted:

liah wrote: »

Grow up.

Funny how you only seem to have an issue when it is women being critised.

Strange definition of "equality" that.

liah

OutlawPete wrote: »

Funny, in the other thread earlier when it was women being critised, you posted:



Funny how you only seem to have an issue when it is women being critised.

Strange definition of "equality" that.

Well, after our feedback thread where you and many others made it blatantly obvious that men don't care about all these things and us women were just being ridiculous I thought you didn't mind.

Strange definition of "equality" indeed.

jimthemental

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

would my flatmates mind if he came into my room?

That's disgusting, make sure he puts down newspaper in the landing and the doorway first.

marxcoo

this thread confuses me....

Sykk

Ok.. What the hell is everyone talking about?

pickarooney

How to make good threads:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0q_q53wsyHU

OutlawPete

liah wrote: »

Well, after our feedback thread where you and many others made it blatantly obvious that men don't care about all these things and us women were just being ridiculous I thought you didn't mind.

"There are none so blind, as those that will not see."

liah wrote: »

Strange definition of "equality" indeed.

There is no mass sexism against women in this forum Liah, never was and never will be.

I don't think there is anything wrong with this thread by the way, zero.

However, if there were a thread titled: "Women are assholes" ..

It would have been locked long ago, as the usual suspects would have been complaining.

Yet, here we have a 'Men are assholes' thread and not an eye-lid batted by those that would if the sexes were reversed.

Now THAT is sexism.

jimthemental

HardLuckWoman wrote: »

Maybe i should just become a lesbian?

bonerm wrote: »

Sounds like the best solution tbh. Be sure to post pix if you go down this route.

:pac:

liah

OutlawPete wrote: »

"There are none so blind, as those that will not see."



There is no mass sexism against women in this forum Liah, never was and never will be.

I don't think there is anything wrong with this thread by the way, zero.

However, if there were a thread titled: "Women are assholes" ..

It would have been locked long ago, as the usual suspects would have been complaining.

Yet, here we have a 'Men are assholes' thread and not an eye-lid batted by those that would if the sexes were reversed.

Now THAT is sexism.

Not an eye-lid is batted? There's guys in here complaining in the exact same fashion as women would if there was an equivalent thread and women standing up for men.

Also, this is one of the first threads I've actually seen like this. Threads generalizing against men come around very, very rarely. This week alone there's been at least two similar threads about women. Don't even want to think how many there's been in this month alone.

EDIT: Just want to say I don't agree with her generalization, I just think it's a bit funny that certain guys jump all over this despite not being able to understand the problem women would have with it.

Dudess

OutlawPete wrote: »

There is no mass sexism against women in this forum Liah, never was and never will be.

Well there are certain posters who clearly have an issue with women and they are given a voice all they want - never have I seen any of them banned.

Yet, here we have a 'Men are assholes' thread and not an eye-lid batted by those that would if the sexes were reversed.

Now THAT is sexism.

Oh ffs, look at my post from the start...

Methvet Nian

OutlawPete wrote: »

"There are none so blind, as those that will not see."



There is no mass sexism against women in this forum Liah, never was and never will be.

I don't think there is anything wrong with this thread by the way, zero.

However, if there were a thread titled: "Women are assholes" ..

It would have been locked long ago, as the usual suspects would have been complaining.

Yet, here we have a 'Men are assholes' thread and not an eye-lid batted by those that would if the sexes were reversed.

Now THAT is sexism.

Did you complain to the moderators. You cannot complain that nobody batted an eyelid if you did not bat an eyelid.

Would it not be the moderators who should close this thread if everyone complained rather than the women you are complaining about? Can they close the thread?