Cyber-Bullying

sNarah

I was reading up on the Phoebe Prince case today, a 15 year old girl who commited suicide after being bullied at school and online. Whereas other factors also lead up to the tragic event, I did get me thinking about abuse and bullying through social networks.

- Has anyone here encoutered such experience with their own children?

- Do you know what they get up to online? Who they talk to? Perhaps even, if the child themselves are pestering other children online?

- How do you deal with abuse being thrown at your child, through Facebook, instant messaging, Bebo and other channels, How do you handle your own child being bullied in the safety of their own home?

I'm just looking to see a few reactions from parents on this issue as I am fascinted by the scale of online bullying and wouldn't have a clue what to do if my own child felt victim of this (I don't actually have any, so perhaps "my future child" would be a better statement).

Any thoughts on this?

metrovelvet

What a horrific end to this situation. I was reading up on it too. I was particularly disgusted to find that the mother of one of the guilty girls defended her daughter.

Not only that, but the bullying continued after her suicide where these people were leaving nasty messages on Pheobe's facebook page.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/03/30/2010-03-30_mom_of_teen_charged_with_bullying_south_hadley_hs_student_phoebe_prince_into_sui.html

The teachers knew about it. The whole community knew about it.

It's like the Field. Bullies cant be successful without the community's complicity.

This is the horror version of Mean Girls.

kelle

There was a similar case in Ireland, but sickeningly nobody was prosecuted for it!

http://www.independent.ie/national-news/teen-driven-to-suicide-by-girl-bullies-torture-1380632.html

At least the Americans take no s**t and hopefully there will be justice for this poor girl - though sadly it won't bring her back.

sNarah

Mh. I'm not sure if I necessarily agree with the prosecution - though somewhere somebody should be held accountable. Whether that are those students, the school or her therapist, I'm not sure. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying they are innocent (they're not) but a lot of other circumstances where at the basis of her suicide, the bullying on that particular day were the final straw.

What also surprised me was the way Phoebe herself did some serious online bullying when she was still in Ireland on Bebo - It's amazing to see how quickly the tides can turn with teenagers and the cruelty that happens.

Her parents were unaware of this and denied it for a long while, until it was confirmed that the IP address was that of Phoebe. The abuse was very similar that what she endured herself and her parents didn't have a clue of what she was writing online. Which brings me back to my original question: how do you control something like that? Looking over a 15 years old shoulder all the time, I can imagine, probably wouldn't work? How does a parent ensure that their child isn't on either side of this? (Being abused or being abusive)? It just completely baffles me how complex these things can become!

PorridgeHead

I think that cyber-bullying should be treated no differently than physical or face-to-face bullying. If parents are OK with their kids being a bully in the physical world, then that's the problem. If parents don't know how to teach their kids that they can't do it in the "hidden Online World", then they need to invest a bit of time learning how they will Parent their Kids in the online environment.
The internet may be just a transactional facility for Generation X (now the parents), but it is a whole other thing to Generation Z (current Kids). Unfortunately if Mum and Dad are a bit web-shy or technology-shy, then how are they going to do the Parenting bit?
I think we parents need to be aware of and involved in the activities which our kids are involved in.
Check out this link from the Jack & Jill Children's Foundation. https://www.jackandjill.ie/2010/07/reassureme-com-parenting-online-programme/
They are promoting a Parental Supervision system which should be used to open a dialogue with the kids, and they benefit from nearly half of the proceeds.

Kildrought

Are you named, or related to someone who is named, in the report?

millebisous

none of the above but i do know the person! the blog is gone now