Dental plan!

strokeslover

"Don't you get it Springfield? It's over. You lose!

Now if you'll excuse me, all this talk has made me hungry."

Heisenberg1

strokeslover wrote: »

"Don't you get it Springfield? It's over. You lose!

Now if you'll excuse me, all this talk has made me hungry."

Shake harder boy !!

Heisenberg1

Dr. Hibbert: Well, your cholesterol level is lethally high, Homer, but I'm more concerned about your gravy level.
Homer Simpson: Now, wait a second. You doctors have been telling us to drink eight glasses of gravy a day!
Dr. Hibbert: [laughs] Well, you're a little confused.
Homer Simpson: Oh, confused, would we?

the purple tin

Executor: May I offer my condolences on the untimely passing of your
Great Aunt Hortense. As her only living heirs, you stand to
inherit her entire estate.

Homer: Poor Aunt Hortense! BOO HOO HOO woo hoo BOO HOO HOO woo hoo!

spitfireIRL

the purple tin wrote: »

Executor: May I offer my condolences on the untimely passing of your
Great Aunt Hortense. As her only living heirs, you stand to
inherit her entire estate.

Homer: Poor Aunt Hortense! BOO HOO HOO woo hoo BOO HOO HOO woo hoo!

"Here you go, 100 dollars each. The rest goes to Ann Landers, as was stipulated in your aunt's will... oh I'm sorry, I must have continued talking after you left the office. I do that sometimes."

Heisenberg1

"Next, on Exploitation Theatre, it's Blackula, followed by Blackenstein, and the Blunchblack of Blotre Blame!"

Funky.

Heisenberg1

Marge, give me your address book, four beers, and my conversation hat.

Hockney

Smithers: Here you are, sir. Wild raspberry compote, celery root remoulade, and pheasant under duck. I hope you enjoy it?

Burns: Oh stop fishing for compliments Smithers, and go home to your can of mushroom soup!

Smithers: Sir, a kind word every now and then....

Burns: I'M CHOKING IT DOWN!! ISN'T THAT THANKS ENOUGH?!

Smithers: (walking off) Sometimes I don't know why I bother....

the purple tin

Jack Marley: Would it be alright if I said a few words?

Mr Burns: Oh Me, me, me! I need all the attention just because it's my party, eh?

Jack Marley: [stands up] Please don't make me retire. My job is the only thing that keeps me alive. I never married and my dog is dead-
[Burns signals the band and they start playing 'for he's a jolly good fellow' loudly]

Jack Marley: But I'm not finished!

Mr Burns: Oh yes you are!
[signals to Lowblow and Crusher who haul Marley away and throw him out on his ear]

Ava_e

Homer frantically filling in his tax returns

Homer how many kids do we have ? no time to count I'll just estimate ... uh nine

Heisenberg1

Captain Tenille: I'm a man of few words.
Any questions?

Homer: Is a poop deck what I think it is?
Captain Tenille: [laughing] I like the cut of your jib.

Homer: What's a jib?
Captain Tenille: Promote that man.

Heisenberg1

TV ANNOUNCER
Coming soon, it's "Truckasaurus: The Movie", starring Marlon Brando as the voice of John Truckasaurus.
JOHN TRUCKASAURUS
You crazy car, I don't know whether to eat you or kiss you.
TV DISCLAIMER
Celebrity voice impersonated.

Riddle101

Ava_e wrote: »

Homer frantically filling in his tax returns

Homer how many kids do we have ? no time to count I'll just estimate ... uh nine

Marge: Homer, we do not have 9 kids.
Homer: Shut up,not listening. Ok if anyone asks. Marge you require 24 hour nursing care, Lisa is a clergyman, Maggie is seven people and Bart was wounded in Vietnam.

wnolan1992

Mr Burns: "Conga, conga, conga! We love Monty Burns more! Conga like you mean it! Please don't make me shock you!"

Heisenberg1

wnolan1992 wrote: »

Mr Burns: "Conga, conga, conga! We love Monty Burns more! Conga like you mean it! Please don't make me shock you!"

Watching that now

talla10

Marge; Homer you never told me your boss lost all his money and had to sell the power plant!

Homer; I can't remember every little detail about my day

Marge; You told me about that candy bar you found four times!

Bart; You found a candy bar?

Homer; Gather round my son and i shall tell you a tale!

Heisenberg1

William Bonney (Billy the Kid) and his evil gang of undead henchmen have risen from the ground.
Billy: Now I’d like you to meet the hole-in-the-ground gang!
Townspeople: [Gasp]
Billy: Frank an’ Jesse James !
Townspeople: [Gasp]
Billy:…the Sundance Kid!
Townspeople: [Gasp]
Comic Book Guy: What happened to Butch Cassidy?
The Sundance Kid: (imitating) What happened to Butch Cassidy? We’re not joined at the hip, you know!
Billy: And the most evil German of all time… Kaiser Wilhelm !
Townspeople: [Mutterings of "Who?"]
Frank: He ain’t no cowboy!
Wilhelm: Sure I am! [stops to think]…uh.. yippy wippy, wippy!
Frank James: OK, he’s in!


William Bonney: Now we can rob the bank, give the money to the poor, rob the poor, and shoot the money!

callaway92

"But I’m gonna have to go with Shasta, since she liked makin’ bacon on the beach"

http://sphotos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/s480x480/250303_10151225305171139_89619293_n.jpg

Heisenberg1

Señor Spielbergo: "Schindler es muy bueno. Burns es el Diablo.

Burns: "Me and Schindler are like peas in a pod! We're both factory owners; we both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked dammit!"

---

the purple tin

Mrs Krabappel: Seymour, you're being totally unfair and the teachers won't stand for it.

Skinner: You don't have the guts to strike.

Mrs Krabappel: You don't have the guts to take us all on.

I]they start walking away from each other[/I
I]Bart pokes his head out of a locker between them and makes a loud chicken noise[/I
I]Skinner and Mrs Krabappel both spin around[/I

Skinner: That's it!

Edna: Stee-rike!

talla10

Smithers; Simpson why aren't you in work?

Homer; I made mistake at work so Lenny sent me home to think About what I did but I can't remember what I did so I'm watching tv

Riddle101

talla10 wrote: »

Smithers; Simpson why aren't you in work?

Homer; I made mistake at work so Lenny sent me home to think About what I did but I can't remember what I did so I'm watching tv

Smithers: Well Lenny's reign of terror is over. Mr Burns has bought the plant back.

Heisenberg1

Principal Skinner: Congratulations Simpson. You just fell for our sting and won yourself three months detention. There's no such thing as Scotchtoberfest.

Groundskeeper Willie: There's not? Ya used me Skinner! Ya used me

Heisenberg1

Marge: 30 cents off Shake N' Bake? Homer!

Homer: We can spare it Marge. We've been blessed.

Homer: My own son going on his first date. (singing) Sunrise, Sunset, Sunrise, Sunset, (sings faster) Cats and the cradle and the silver spoon. Yes, we have no bananas. (starts sobbing)

Jordan 199

Cletus: Hey, slow down! I wants ta talk to ya! Give us 300 pretzels.

Marge: You see? A little persistence and patience pays off. That will be $300.

Cletus: Hey, I don't think so. I got me 300 coupons.

Marge: I should have said limit one per customer.

Cletus: Shoulda but didna, so hand them over. Hey kids, we're eating dinner tonight! Come out Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dillon, Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, Brittany, Wesley, Rumor, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Cloe, Max, Hunter, Kendall, Katelan, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Keera, Ian, Luaran, Q-bert, Phil.

.jacksparrow.

Jordan 191 wrote: »

Cletus: Hey, slow down! I wants ta talk to ya! Give us 300 pretzels.

Marge: You see? A little persistence and patience pays off. That will be $300.

Cletus: Hey, I don't think so. I got me 300 coupons.

Marge: I should have said limit one per customer.

Cletus: Shoulda but didna, so hand them over. Hey kids, we're eating dinner tonight! Come out Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dillon, Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, Brittany, Wesley, Rumor, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Cloe, Max, Hunter, Kendall, Katelan, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Keera, Ian, Luaran, Q-bert, Phil.

I just spoke that whole seen in my head,in cleedas accent!

Heisenberg1

Homer: You're right Marge.. I'll do it.. But if I die during the operation will you do one thing for me?
Marge: Oh, anything sweetheart...
Homer: Blow up the hospital...
Marge: Hmm, I said I'll do it... so I guess I'll have to...

DazMarz

Homer runs through the forest in the dead of night, he trips and falls. Ominous "X-Files"-style music plays and an eerie green glow comes from the forest. A weird looking creature that glows green, has huge eyes and a high-pitched voice emerges. Homer looks on in horror.

Homer: Bah-ha! Please! Don't hurt me!

Creature: Don't be afraid...

Homer: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHH!

he has run through a large field of long grass and has spelled out YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHH! in it

Heisenberg1

Legs: Johnny Tightlips, where'd they hit ya?
Johnny Tightlips: I ain't sayin' nothin'.
Legs: But what'll I tell the doctor?
Johnny Tightlips: Tell him to suck a lemon.

Heisenberg1

Gloria S.: Johnny-boy hasn't been able to cut it, man-wise, for some time, not that I'd want stench of gin and sour defeat pressed against me.

John S.: That's enough, Gloria!

Reverend Lovejoy: John, why don't you speak?

John S.: She never cooks, she doesn't keep a clean house, she
[shouts]

John S.: smokes and she drinks and she talks profanely! She's the queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: No, I'm not.

John S.: [shouts] Queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: No, I'm not!

John S.: [shouts] Here's your crown, Your

Majesty. Queen of the harpies!

Gloria S.: Get away from me, you swine!



One of my all time favourites.