Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Dental plan!

Options
1…149150152154155…323

Comments

  • Options
    #4532
    toastedpickles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,607 ✭✭✭toastedpickles


    spitfireIRL wrote: »
    Quiet Lou, or I'll bust you down to Sergeant so fast it'll make your head spin!

    I already am sergeant chief


  • Options
    #4533
    paddylonglegs
    Registered Users Posts: 3,538 ✭✭✭paddylonglegs


    Ahoy ahoy?


  • Options
    #4534
    Fuzzytrooper
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 896 Mod ✭✭✭✭Fuzzytrooper


    Yarr I'm not attractive


  • Options
    #4535
    Nerdkiller1991
    Registered Users Posts: 3,998 ✭✭✭Nerdkiller1991


    paddylonglegs wrote: »
    Ahoy ahoy?
    *kazzoo mode* "Hello, Mr. Burns. This is the kidnapper. Do you miss your son?"


  • Options
    #4536
    pajor
    Registered Users Posts: 3,573 ✭✭✭pajor


    Nerdkiller1991 wrote: »
    *kazzoo mode* "Hello, Mr. Burns. This is the kidnapper. Do you miss your son?"

    Yes I'm missing one son. Return it immediately!


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #4537
    FarmerBrowne
    Registered Users Posts: 484 ✭✭FarmerBrowne


    Seeing that it is the season:

    Abe: What a voice, young Homer is gonna make me a millionaire

    Homer: Fall on your knees, O hear the angel voices, O night diiivinnne, hey my voice just broke, oh night when christ was born


  • Options
    #4538
    Nerdkiller1991
    Registered Users Posts: 3,998 ✭✭✭Nerdkiller1991


    pajor wrote: »
    Yes I'm missing one son. Return it immediately!
    "If you really miss Larry, then prove it and you can have him back today."


  • Options
    #4539
    toastedpickles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,607 ✭✭✭toastedpickles


    Welcome to the internet, my friend, how can I help you?

    I'm interested in upgrading my 28.8 kilobaud internet connection to a 1.5 megabit fiber optic T1 line. Will you be able to provide an IP router that's compatible with my token ring ethernet LAN configuration?

    ...

    Can I have some money now?


  • Options
    #4540
    Bertser
    Registered Users Posts: 633 ✭✭✭Bertser


    Edna: You haven't dealt with women for a long time, have you, Sergeant?

    Skinner: Are you asking me out?


  • Options
    #4541
    Chancer3001
    Registered Users Posts: 5,480 ✭✭✭Chancer3001


    Can't sleep.
    Clown will eat me.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #4542
    Marzipan85
    Registered Users Posts: 133 ✭✭Marzipan85


    What really matters is my title. I think I'll make myself... vice president. No, wait! Junior vice president!


  • Options
    #4543
    Marzipan85
    Registered Users Posts: 133 ✭✭Marzipan85


    BURNS
    That's the kind of man I need on my team, Smithers. A real scrapper. A self-made man, like me. Bring this Grimes fellow to me. I want to make him my Executive Vice President.

    SMITHERS
    Yes, Sir.

    [The next day, Burns watches television again. Smithers brings in Frank Grimes.]

    BURNS
    Smithers, I've just seen the most heroic dog on television. He pulled a toddler from the path of a speeding car, then pushed a criminal in front of it. Find this dog. I want to make him my Executive Vice President.


  • Options
    #4544
    Noccy_Mondy
    Registered Users Posts: 6,845 ✭✭✭Noccy_Mondy


    Marge: Why don't we do something to take our minds off the storm? [looks through a box] Oooh, a Rubik's Cube! Let's all work it together.
    Lisa: Okay, start with diagonal colors.

    [Marge turns the cube]

    Homer: Use your main finger on the yellow side and your other finger on the orange side and turn it.

    Marge: My main finger?

    [the family begins to talking at the same time]

    Marge:     One at a time!

    Bart: Spin the middle side topwise. Topwise!

    Marge: Now I remember why I put this down here in the first place!


  • Options
    #4545
    Noccy_Mondy
    Registered Users Posts: 6,845 ✭✭✭Noccy_Mondy


    Flanders: (to Moe) You ugly, hate-filled man!

    Moe: Hey, hey, I may be ugly and hate-filled, but I... um, what was the third thing you said?

    (Okay i'll stop now :P)


  • Options
    #4546
    toastedpickles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,607 ✭✭✭toastedpickles


    Homer, you are the most horrible human being i have ever met

    Hey I got off easy!


  • Options
    #4547
    That_Guy
    Registered Users Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Groundskeeper Willie: It won’t last. Brothers and sisters are natural enemies! Like Englishmen and Scots! Or Welshmen and Scots! Or Japanese and Scots! Or Scots and other Scots! Damn Scots! They ruined Scotland!
    Principal Skinner: You Scots sure are a contentious people.
    Willie: You just made an enemy for life!


  • Options
    #4548
    Noccy_Mondy
    Registered Users Posts: 6,845 ✭✭✭Noccy_Mondy


    Ned: Howdily-doodely.

    Homer: Greetings, friends. Do you wish to look--

    (Ned hangs up)

    Ned: Oh, it's that darn recording again.

    Maude: Of course it was. It's been calling all night. Just unplug the phone.

    Homer: Greetings, friends--

    (Ned hangs up)

    Ned:     Shoot!

    Maude: That is it, Ned! If you don't unplug that phone right now, you're sleeping on the lawn.

    Homer: (shouts through his window) Will you two shut up?! People are trying to sleep!


  • Options
    #4549
    toastedpickles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,607 ✭✭✭toastedpickles


    Seems appropriate for the above post :pac:

    You'l have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel


  • Options
    #4550
    McChubbin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    I've been laughing at this clip for the last 10 minutes. Seems appropriate considering I've been awake since 3am.


  • Options
    #4551
    Welsh Megaman
    Registered Users Posts: 72,613 ✭✭✭✭Welsh Megaman


    I got propane in my urethra ;)


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #4552
    Nerdkiller1991
    Registered Users Posts: 3,998 ✭✭✭Nerdkiller1991


    Welsh Megaman wrote: »
    I got propane in my urethra ;)
    King of the Hill thread is that-a-way, I tell you what.


  • Options
    #4553
    Welsh Megaman
    Registered Users Posts: 72,613 ✭✭✭✭Welsh Megaman


    Nerdkiller1991 wrote: »
    King of the Hill thread is that-a-way, I tell you what.

    Featured in a Simpsons episode when Homer is flicking tv channels, hence the wink emoticon to suggest being fooled...thank you, come again!


  • Options
    #4554
    wnolan1992
    Registered Users Posts: 14,009 ✭✭✭✭wnolan1992


    "I suped up my riding mower! ugg-ugg-ugg-ugg!"

    [...]

    "Oh no! I've killed Mr. Wilson! Looks like it's back to jail for me... ugg-ugg-ugg-ugg-ugg!"


  • Options
    #4555
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 41,065 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    What the.....

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • Options
    #4556
    Noccy_Mondy
    Registered Users Posts: 6,845 ✭✭✭Noccy_Mondy


    Groundskeeper Willie: And that's how Willie waters. Now you take the hoose.

    Nelson: The moose?

    Groundskeeper Willie: The hoose! The hoose!

    Nelson: Is this right?

    Groundskeeper Willie: Ack! Turn off the noozle!!

    Nelson: Noodles?! What noodles?!


  • Options
    #4557
    Nerdkiller1991
    Registered Users Posts: 3,998 ✭✭✭Nerdkiller1991


    Welsh Megaman wrote: »
    Featured in a Simpsons episode when Homer is flicking tv channels, hence the wink emoticon to suggest being fooled...thank you, come again!
    I know that. I was just making reference to what the line was referencing.


  • Options
    #4558
    paddylonglegs
    Registered Users Posts: 3,538 ✭✭✭paddylonglegs


    Nerdkiller1991 wrote: »
    I know that. I was just making reference to what the line was referencing.

    Why were you referencing it if he already knew what the reference was?


  • Options
    #4559
    SmallTeapot
    Registered Users Posts: 1,759 ✭✭✭SmallTeapot


    ^^^^ Won't someone think of the children!! :P


  • Options
    #4560
    ivytwine
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,114 ✭✭✭ivytwine


    This just popped into my head randomly, started chuckling to myself...

    Homer: "Yes, you sir- you look like a man who needs help satisfying his wife!"

    *punch*


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #4561
    burnhardlanger
    Closed Accounts Posts: 218 ✭✭burnhardlanger


    Krusty: It wasn't my fault.....it was the Percodan....if you ask me that stuff rots your brain...and now a word from our new sponsors......PERCODAN?!?!?!.....awww crap!!


Advertisement