Dental plan!

paddylonglegs

scottmcb04 wrote: »

Dr nick outside burning office:

"Inflammable means flammable, what a country!"

Call 1800-DoctorB. The B is for bargain!

ivytwine

The coroner? I hate that guy!

pajor

ivytwine wrote: »

The coroner? I hate that guy!

Such a beautiful day. I think I'll go out the window!

burnhardlanger

Ma Cans, Ma precious antique cans! Aww look what ya dun to em.

Reoil

Homer talking to his penis at a urinal:
"Oh, they're talking about the movie! Hurry up, you idiot! No, no, don't stop! I'm sorry I got mad. I'll do that thing you like!"

Wotsername

Marge: There are only 49 stars on that flag.

Grampa: It'll be a cold cold day in hell before i recognise Missouri.

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

Homer: "Now we all know the 13 stripes are for good luck. But why does the American flag have precisely 47 stars?"
Apu: "Because this particular flag is ridiculously out of date. The library must have purchased it during the brief period in 1912 after New Mexico became a state but before Arizona did."
Homer: "Uhhh... partial credit."

banquo

"Look Smithers, a bird has become petrified and lost his way."
"I think that's a rock Sir."
"Yes well, we'll just see what the lab says about that."

Burlap_Sack

Brad Goodman: Troy. This circle is you.
Troy McClure: My god! It's like you've known me all your life!

dr.fuzzenstein

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

Homer: "Now we all know the 13 stripes are for good luck. But why does the American flag have precisely 47 stars?"
Apu: "Because this particular flag is ridiculously out of date. The library must have purchased it during the brief period in 1912 after New Mexico became a state but before Arizona did."
Homer: "Uhhh... partial credit."

Examiner: Wait, wait... just say slavery.
Apu: Slavery it is, sir!

wnolan1992

Bart: Our forgotten veterans. Their guns are quiet now. Their helmets lost, or pawned. And yet here they are, making flags out of old clothes. Sure, they may not have the right number of stripes. And the colors are all wrong. And some purists will tell you the American flag doesn't contain the word "Jordache". But you know, if they run this up the flagpole, I'll salute. I'm Bart Simpson.
Lisa: Hmm, thank you Bart, for yet another touching "Bart's People". Now, turning to...
Bart: I just think our veterans deserve a little recognition.
Lisa: That's what Veteran's Day is for, Bart.
Bart: But is that really enough to honor our brave soldiers?
Lisa: Eh, heh, heh...they also have Memorial Day.
Bart: Oh, Lisa, maybe you're right, maybe you're wrong! The important thing is, veterans deserve a day to honor them!
Lisa: [through clenched teeth] They have two!
Bart: Well maybe they should have three. I'm Bart Simpson.

toastedpickles

900 DOLLERYDOOS?!?!

Wotsername

Lou: Another case of Monopoly related violence.

Chief Wigum (disgusted): How do those Parker brothers sleep at night?

haro124

LISA: All right, how do we pay off our foreign debt?
ADVISER: I’m afraid it looks pretty grim. We’re going to have to give them amber waves of grain, the purple mountain’s majesty, and the shores of Tripoli.
LISA: We don’t own the shores of Tripoli.
ADVISER: Shh. By the time they find out, we’ll have taken our cyanide pills.

iDave

Your watching Eye on Springfield

Heisenberg1

Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.
Homer: Pfff. That's no reason to block the TV

Bruno Dundridge: Hey, you're just some punk kid, aren't you? Well, you picked the wrong guy to tangle with, mate!
Bart: [laughs] I don't think so. You're all the way over in Australia. Hey, I think I hear a dingo eating your baby.

toastedpickles

Heisenberg1 wrote: »

Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.
Homer: Pfff. That's no reason to block the TV

Bruno Dundridge: Hey, you're just some punk kid, aren't you? Well, you picked the wrong guy to tangle with, mate!
Bart: [laughs] I don't think so. You're all the way over in Australia. Hey, I think I hear a dingo eating your baby.

Ooh! Ah, that's it. I'm going to report this to me member of Parliament. Hey, Gus! I got something to report to you.


That's a bloody outrage, it is! I want to take this all the way to the Prime Minister. Hey! Mr. Prime Minister! Andy!

Eh, mates! What's the good word?

Heisenberg1

You work and you slave and you steal just enough for a sweet lick of that shiny brass ring.
Don't I get a lick? Doesrt Gil get a lick? - Simpson, HomerJ.
- [Whimpering] Hey, put in a good word for ol' Gil, would ya? Mr.
Simpson, this government computer can process over nine tax returns per day.
Did you really think you could fool it? No, sir.
I'm really sorry, sir.
An older boy told me to do it.
You're looking at five years, minimum.
No, sir.
Please, I can't go to prison.
They pee in a cup and throw it on you! I saw it in a movie.
You won't be seeing any prison movies where you're going- prison! [Sobbing] No, please! I'll do anything.
Anything? Well, that's a start.

Heisenberg1

Agent Johnston-Be on the lookout for a 1936 maroon Stutz Bearcat.

Cheif Wiggum- Uh, that really was more of a burgundy

Moe: "So Lenny, let's say you pull a thorn outta the Pope's butt, and he grants you one wish, what'll it be?" Lenny: "Hmm, only one, huh? Well... I've always wondered what it'd feel like to wear something that's been ironed." Carl: "That'd be sweet. What about you, Moe?" Moe: "Ah, gee, I was gonna say a night with Joey Heatherton, but an ironed shirt... damn, that's tempting."

Burlap_Sack

January February March April wrote: »

I went to a certain carwash in Santry (I won't say which one) and it was ****. My car is making a funny noise after coming out of it and the car is still fucking dirty. I was essentially robbed of 6 Euro. Thieving scum.

Bart: Why are we still grifting? The car's paid for; doesn't that balance out the universe?
Homer: In a way, but I also remembered some other stuff, like my bike that was stolen in third grade. Plus the baldness.
Bart: Okay, I'm sold.

J. Marston

Lionel Hutz Esq.

Works on contingency?

No, money down!

toastedpickles

Australia! America!

Homer, that's enough!

Australia! America!

-punch-

Here in America we don't tolerate that kind of crap, Sir!

ivytwine

There's nothing wrong with the bidet, is there?!!!

toastedpickles

My mind is always open to new ideas

OINIONS?! IN THE PEAS?! WHAT THE HELL?!!?

OntheStrings

Grampa: I used to be with it, then they changed what it was. Now what I'm with isn't it, and what's it seems weird and scary to me. It'll happen to you too!

Conall Cernach

Some from an episode on RTE2 today
Bart: You're up to something, aren't ya?
Homer: No! I'm just going out to commit certain deeds.


Moe: Hawaii here we come. Ananakooli, Makawani, Ana-ona, Nanawula Wa, Hawaii...ha
Homer: Hawaii? What about Hawaii? Moe? Who's going to Hawaii? Am I going to Hawaii?
Wiggum: Stop saying Hawaii in there.

Dr Robotnik

Why do you think I brought you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Because I didn't hear anyone laughing. Did you?

Dirty Dingus McGee

A sign gag from the Bart vs Australia Episode.

"Cultural Centre.Cart your arse on in."

ivytwine

When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, like that movie, Spaceballs . Instead it's been dark and disturbing, like that movie, Police Academy. ..

RobbingBandit

Abe: I am the Lindberg Baby.
F.B.I Agent: Sir are you trying to stall us or are you senile.
Abe: A little of column A, a little of column B.