Dental plan!

dr.fuzzenstein

Galway K9 wrote: »

No, You're gay for moleman!

No-one's gay for Moleman.:(

Lyrical

Moe: You go through life, you try to resist the urge to punch people in the face, and for what? For some pimply little puke to treat you like dirt! Well, I'm better than dirt! Well... most kinds of dirt. I mean, not that fancy store-bought dirt. That stuff's loaded with nutrients. I... I can't compete with that stuff.

Suryavarman

Ned: Excuse me neighbour! I couldn't help but notice you picked pretty much all of my flowers!
Homer: Can't make a float without flowers...
Ned: Uh, sure enough, but did you have to salt the earth so nothing would ever grow again?
Homer: Hehehehe.. yeah.

Noccy_Mondy

Homer: Look at that red-headed kid. There must be twenty dollars worth of grease on his forehead alone.

FarmerBrowne

Noccy_Mondy wrote: »

Homer: Look at that red-headed kid. There must be twenty dollars worth of grease on his forehead alone.

My God, you're greasy

Limerick Dude

FarmerBrowne wrote: »

My God, you're greasy

Mr. Maruka, Help!

Dirty Dingus McGee

"Compadres! It is imperative that we crush the freedom fighters before the start of the rainy season. And remember - a shiny new donkey for whoever brings me the head of Colonel Montoya”

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

There's a doin's a transpirin!

Galway K9

Cletus: Hey, Mr TV man, look what i can do!
( shows the missing finger trick)
Cletus: Wanna know how i do it?
EPA guy: 3 Generations of inbreeding?

dr.fuzzenstein

But he's a loser! He's pathetic! He's...a Simpson.

toastedpickles

I suggest you leave immediately.

Or what? You'll release the dogs, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you?
Well, go ahead, do your worst!

My worst eh?!

Smithers! Release the robotic Richard Simmons!

paddylonglegs

Iv had "blow the man down matey, blow the man down" by the sea captain in my head for the last few days now

Omackeral

Hi, you've reached the Corey hot-line. $4.95 a minute. Here are some words that rhyme with Corey: Gory. Story. Allegory. Montessori.

The Plank

http://vimeo.com/24701987

'If he fights back I'll say that he's gay'

Noccy_Mondy

Bart: Dear God, we paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing.

Sunglasses Ron

Announcer: Okay, the capital of North Dakota is named after what German ruler?

Homer: HITLER!

Marge: Hitler North Dakota?

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

Oh well, I suppose its time for your bribe. You can have the washer and dryer over where the lovely Mr Smithers is standing, or you can trade it all for what's in this box.

viper006

Lionel Hutz: Homer, I dont use the word "Hero" often but you are the greatest hero in American History.

pojfexcsc

"So what do you do?"

"Well Sir, I stand out in front of cars and sue the drivers"

dr.fuzzenstein

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

Oh well, I suppose its time for your bribe. You can have the washer and dryer over where the lovely Mr Smithers is standing, or you can trade it all for what's in this box.

The box, the box!

pajor

A great line and general insult:

"Hey fun boys! Get a room!"

Omackeral

"I’ve had a lot of jobs in my life: boxer, mascot, astronaut, baby proofer, imitation Krusty, duck driver, hippie, plow driver, food critic, conceptual artist, grease salesman, carny, mayor, grifter, body guard for the mayor, country western manager, garbage commissioner, mountain climber, farmer, inventor, Smithers, Poochie, celebrity assistant, power plant worker, fortune cookie writer, beer baron, Kwik-E-Mart jerk, homophobe, and missionary, but protecting people, that gives me the best feeling of all."

Noccy_Mondy

Who can prevent forest fires? You have selected you, referring to me. That is incorrect, the correct answer is you.

Sunglasses Ron

Homer begs Marge to take him back into the house

Homer: Wait a minute...wait, that's it! I know now what I can offer you
that no one else can: complete and utter dependence!

Marge: Homer, that's not a good thing!

RobbingBandit

Still one of the best scenes.

Edna Krabappel: Okay, now who can pick out the predicate in this sentence?

Sleeping Homer Simpson: Ahhh!

Edna Krabappel: What is it now, Bart?

Bart Simpson: Night terrors, Ma'am.

Sleeping Homer Simpson: Ahh! Cobras!

RobbingBandit

Noccy_Mondy wrote: »

Who can prevent forest fires? You have selected you, referring to me. That is incorrect, the correct answer is you.

Not from this scene but still funny as hell.

Homer: When a fire starts to burn there is a lesson you should learn, something, something then you'll see you'll avoid catastrophe.

C14N

RobbingBandit wrote: »

Not from this scene but still funny as hell.

Homer: When a fire starts to burn there is a lesson you should learn, something, something then you'll see you'll avoid catastrophe.

Homer: Ahbababab! If ifs and buts were candy and nuts-ngh, how does the rest of that go?

C14N

Homer: He's a carnie! And part of a noble tradition! Carnies built this country, the carnival part of it anyway.

suicide_circus

Guide: "On May 21, 1864 the men of the 9th Bearded Infantry were sunning and fluffing their beards in the sun.Suddenly, enemy troops crested that hill over there."

Civil War recreation enemy actor: "Fort Springfield, we surrender unconditionally! We're sick! We need leeches and hacksaws to saw off our gangrenous limbs."

Guide: "But the Springfield brigade was too brave to accept their surrender."

Civil War recreation Springfielder actor: "Come on, boys.Those white flags are no match for our muskets! Charge!"

Guide: "And the Springfielders heroically slaughtered their enemies as they prayed for mercy."

C14N

suicide_circus wrote: »

Guide: "On May 21, 1864 the men of the 9th Bearded Infantry were sunning and fluffing their beards in the sun.Suddenly, enemy troops crested that hill over there."

Civil War recreation enemy actor: "Fort Springfield, we surrender unconditionally! We're sick! We need leeches and hacksaws to saw off our gangrenous limbs."

Guide: "But the Springfield brigade was too brave to accept their surrender."

Civil War recreation Springfielder actor: "Come on, boys.Those white flags are no match for our muskets! Charge!"

Guide: "And the Springfielders heroically slaughtered their enemies as they prayed for mercy."

Reminds me of

Tour Guide: The enemy surrounded the fort, and said that if the captain was sent out, the rest would be spared.
Bart: What did they do?
Tour Guide: They sent him out!
Bart: Was he killed?
Tour Guide: And how! That's why they call it 'Fort Sensible'.