Dental plan!

Lyrical

Lisa: And now you can go back to just being you, instead of a one-dimensional character with a silly catch phrase.
Homer: (slips as he leans on his elbow and breaks a lamp) D'oh!
Bart: Ay, caramba!
Marge: (Grumbling) Mmmmmmmm!
Maggie: (pacifier sucking noise)
Ned Flanders: Hidely-ho!
Barney: (Belches)
Nelson: HA, HAAAH!
Mr. Burns: Ex-cellent!
(Long pause, then everyone stares at Lisa)
Lisa: If anyone wants me, I'll be in my room.
Homer: What kind of catch phrase is that?

dr.fuzzenstein

'Duffman's pension has been mismanaged! Oooh yeah!'

corblimey

Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem!

suicide_circus

Principle Skinner: (reading Bart's blatantly forged sick note) "please excuse my handwriting, I busted whichever hand it is I write with"

toastedpickles

Dad, I agree that Bart should be punished, but 'The Itchy and Scratchy Movie' is the defining event of our generation. How would you've liked it if someone told you that you couldn't watch the moon landing? Hmm.
'That's one small step for man. One giant leap for mankind.'
Yummy, yummy, yummy I got love in my tummy and I feel like loving you!

DazMarz

Dept. Of Labour Agent: We found a missing Brazilian soccer team working in your reactor core!

Mr Burns: That plane crashed on my property!!!

Noccy_Mondy

Manager: I'm sorry, but if you don't come up with that money by tomorrow, the bank is going to take your house.
Homer: Well, good luck finding it, because I'm going to take the numbers off tonight!
Manager: Well, we'll look for the house with no numbers.
Homer: Then I'll take off the numbers on my neighbor's house.
Manager: So, well then we'll look for the house next to the house with no numbers.
Homer: [thinks for a bit] All right, you'll get your money.

corblimey

toastedpickles wrote: »

Dad, I agree that Bart should be punished, but 'The Itchy and Scratchy Movie' is the defining event of our generation. How would you've liked it if someone told you that you couldn't watch the moon landing? Hmm.
'That's one small step for man. One giant leap for mankind.'
Yummy, yummy, yummy I got love in my tummy and I feel like loving you!

Homer: I know my punishment may seem a little harsh, but I can't go back on it. You're welcome to watch anything you want on TV.
Bart: TV sucks.
Homer: I know you're upset right now, so I'll pretend you didn't say that.

Royce McCutcheon

Attendant: Yeah, I did see some bikers drive by here with a blue-haired woman about ten minutes ago. Said they were gonna spend the night at that Crystal Lake camp ground. Section K, space 217. Yeah, I'm sorry I can't be of more help.

Homer Simpson: I guess I'll never find her.

dr.fuzzenstein

Royce McCutcheon wrote: »

Attendant: Yeah, I did see some bikers drive by here with a blue-haired woman about ten minutes ago. Said they were gonna spend the night at that Crystal Lake camp ground. Section K, space 217. Yeah, I'm sorry I can't be of more help.

Homer Simpson: I guess I'll never find her.

corblimey

Homer: Apu, if I've learned anything, it's that life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

paddylonglegs

Ma cans, ma precious antique cans!

haro124

Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Twenty. Your move, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: I'll take a hit, dealer.
[Homer deals Bond a card]
James Bond: Joker? You were supposed to take those out.
Homer: Oh, sorry.
[Homer deals Bond another card]
James Bond: What's this? "Rules for Draw and Stud Poker"?
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: What a pity, Mr. Bond...
[Oddjob and Jaws advance on Bond and grab him]
James Bond: But it was Homer's fault. I can't lose. I never lose.
[Oddjob and Jaws drag Bond out of the casino]
James Bond: At least tell me your plans for world domination.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Oh ho, ho, I'm not falling for *that* one again.

viper006

Ralph: What's a battle?
Principal Skinner: Hahahaha, lets go.
Superintendent Chalmers: Did that boy say what's a battle?
Principal Skinner: No he said What's that rattle, it's about the heating duct.
Superintendent Chalmers: Hmm, it sounded like battle.
Principal Skinner: I've had a cold, so--
Superintendent Chalmers: Oh so you hear r's as b's?

BeerWolf

Homer: Bring on the Swear Jar! Do I have to pay if I hit my hand with a hammer?
Marge: Yes, Homer.
Homer: What if I catch on fire?
Marge: No, Homer.
Homer: What if I see something really weird in the sky?
Marge: Yes, Homer.
Homer: What about when we snuggle?
Marge: Hmmm, that's okay.

____

Video -- Wtf? o.O

Ken Shamrock

HOMER
(leaning out the window and yelling even louder) MILHOUSE!!!

MILHOUSE
(yelling from a distance) WHAT?!!

HOMER
TELL BART TO COME HOME!!!

MILHOUSE
I THINK HE'S AT NELSON'S!!!

HOMER
WHO'S NELSON?!!

Riddle101

Rev Lovejoy: And now a hymm. In the Garden of Eden, by I. Ron Butterfly

Rev Lovejoy: Waitaminute.... This sounds like Rock and or Roll

Welsh Megaman

Riddle101 wrote: »

Rev Lovejoy: And now a hymm. In the Garden of Eden, by I. Ron Butterfly

Rev Lovejoy: Waitaminute.... This sounds like Rock and or Roll

*beachball*

dr.fuzzenstein

You're the fattest thing I've seen and I've been on safari!

corblimey

Riddle101 wrote: »

Rev Lovejoy: And now a hymm. In the Garden of Eden, by I. Ron Butterfly

Rev Lovejoy: Waitaminute.... This sounds like Rock and or Roll

Hey Marge, remember when we used to make out to this hymn?

Noccy_Mondy

I have a plethora coming up

Moe: Listen up, this is the busiest drinking day of the year. Where are the designated drivers? *two guys raise their hands* Beat it! I got no room for cheapskates!

*****

Homer: Fourty-two bathtubs, please.
Store clerk: You know, they're fifty for 3,000 dollars today.
Homer: I said fourty-two!

*****

Marge: What on earth happened down there?
Bart: One of the stills-
Homer: Uh, nothing, Marge. I think it must have been that bean I had for dinner!

*****

Marge: Homer, the Lord only asks for an hour a week.
Homer: In that case, he should have made the weekend an hour longer. Lousy God!

*****

And my own favourite.....

Homer: I would like the phonebook for a Hokido, Japan, please.
Librarian: Okay, here you go. The phonebook for Hokido, Japan.
Homer: Thank you. May I use your phone?
Librarian: Is it a local call?
Homer:....yyyyesss.

toastedpickles

This is a thousand monkeys working at a thousand typewriters. Soon, they'll have written the greatest novel known to man!
Let's see.. 'It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times!?'
You stupid monkey!

wnolan1992

"If you don't buy my recorrrrrrdd, then Al Qaeda wins!"


"Don't do the crime if you can't do the... key lime!"
"This is for your show's slight decline in quality over the years!"
"I've run out of pie related puns!"


Orphan: "Who will tweat my whooping cough? *coughs*"
Quimby: "Search me, come back when you want a giant rack."

Burns: "Now pie that Brownie, fruitcake!"

corblimey

Homer: I believe Freddy Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel

Jikashi

Lisa: I'm sure he'll be found innocent by a fair and impartial jury.
Homer: Aw, jury duty? I'll see that Quimby kid hanged for this!
Lisa: I knew it was a bad idea to watch him open the mail...

Heisenberg1

Arnie Pye: (describing Homer's actions) "He's jumping out of the car, Kent! He's trying to climb over the fence. Now he's realizing he's too fat. He's digging a hole like a dog. Now he's given up on that, and he's running back and forth. He's climbing into a pipe, and he seems to be stuck. His legs are dangling in a comical fashion. Oh, it's the saddest thing I've ever seen!"

Kent Brockman: "Arnie, Arnie, how are the children?"

Arnie Pye: (sarcastic) "I can't see through metal, Kent"

Chief Wiggum: "Alright Fattie out of the pipe!"

Homer Simpson: (seeing everyone take their kids out of his day care centre when they find out his true colours) No! No one is taking my kids from me! (jumps off stage and runs away with the kids) Run Children Run!
(Chief Wiggum and a mob of parents run after him calling out)
Cletus: Come Back Here with my Youngies!

Galway K9

See Jasper without a beard!! :O

time 0:10

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HlwtgaQZYDI

haro124

Marge: Now, be good for Grampa while we're at the parent-teacher meeting. We'll bring back dinner.
Lisa: What are we gonna have?
Homer: Well that depends on what your teachers say. If both of you have been good, pizza. If you've been bad, um... let's see, poison.
Lisa: What if one of us has been good and one of us has been bad?
Bart: Poison pizza.
Homer: Oh no, I'm not making two stops.

wnolan1992

Moe: Chief Wiggum! Can you help me find my bar rag?
Wiggum: I can't even find my car in the parking lot of the mall. There was half a kilo of heroin and two suspects in there!

McChubbin

Relavent!