Dental plan!

corblimey

Bart: There's my name, right there: Bart Simpson.
Milhouse: Looks more like Brad Stortch.
Martin: No! It says Betty -- Betty Symington.
Nelson: (punches Bart) That's for taking credit for other people's work.

dr.fuzzenstein

corblimey wrote: »

Bart: There's my name, right there: Bart Simpson.
Milhouse: Looks more like Brad Stortch.
Martin: No! It says Betty -- Betty Symington.
Nelson: (punches Bart) That's for taking credit for other people's work.

I didn't do it!

SEPT 23 1989

Krusty: No, no! Let me finish, I work like I drink, alone.
or with a monkey watching me.
That way, if I pass out, he turns me on my side

Frankie5Angels

Homer: WELL EXCUUUUSE ME FOR HAVING ENORMOUS FLAWS THAT I DON'T WORK ON! :pac:

corblimey

A gun is not a weapon, Marge. It's a tool. Like a butcher knife, or a harpoon, or... uh... an alligator.

Royce McCutcheon

Ralph: Look, Big Daddy, it's regular daddy

wnolan1992

Ralph: Daddy, when I grow up I wanna be just like you.
Skinner: Better start eatin' son!

corblimey

Mr.Stanky: Samantha, you're my little girl, and sometimes my imagination runs away with me. Just, just tell me what happened.
Samantha: Well, Milhouse and I...
Mr.Stanky: That's enough!

ivytwine

corblimey wrote: »

Mr.Stanky: Samantha, you're my little girl, and sometimes my imagination runs away with me. Just, just tell me what happened.
Samantha: Well, Milhouse and I...
Mr.Stanky: That's enough!

Ah Samantha! Ne pas de boys!

paddylonglegs

Homer talking to mindy -
Uh, murphy. You...you are a elf.... Uncontrollably, I think... Ah wee non ho regee bo

TheDoctor

Troy McClure: Come on Jimmy, let's take a peek at the killing floor.
Jimmy: Ohhh!
Troy McCLure: Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor, it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported.

ivytwine

paddylonglegs wrote: »

Homer talking to mindy -
Uh, murphy. You...you are a elf.... Uncontrollably, I think... Ah wee non ho regee bo

I'm tired of these jokes about my giant hand. The first such incident occurred in 1956...

corblimey

Hillbilly 1: I caught my wife in bed with my best friend.
Hillbilly 2: You bitter?
Hillbilly 1: Yeah, bit HIM too!

spitfireIRL

“Mr. Burns was admitted to a local hospital where he was pronounced dead. He was then transferred to a better hospital where his condition was upgraded to 'alive.'”

TheDoctor

Mr. Burns: Men, there's a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game. I know because... I crippled him myself to inspire you.
[Cuts to Milhouse in hospital]
Milhouse: I hope they win or Mr. Burns said he's coming back.

corblimey

Mr. Burns: Oops, I've said too much. Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
Smithers: You mean the revolver, sir?
Mr. Burns: Precisely. Be sure to wipe your own memory clear when you're finished.

spitfireIRL

Krusty's Accountant: Let me get this straight. You took all the money you made franchising your name and bet it *against* the Harlem Globetrotters?

Krusty the Clown: [miserable] Oh, I thought the Generals were due!
[watches the game on TV]

Krusty the Clown: He's spinning the ball on his finger! Just take it! Take it!
[the Globetrotters score]
Krusty the Clown: That game was fixed! They were using a freakin' ladder, for God's sake!

corblimey

Homer: Please, I can't go to prison. They pee in a cup and throw it on you! I saw it in a movie.
IRS Agent: You won't be seeing any prison movies where you're going... prison!

Lyrical

Homer: Aw, I've never been so miserable in all my life. But I can't take it out on Marge and the kids -- I've gotta carry the burden all by myself.

[walks in] Hi, honey, how are you?

Marge: Well, actually --

Homer: Aw, I can't go on with this charade any longer! I hate my job, I hate my life, and ever since I found out about this baby there's been nothing but bad luck.

Marge: My contractions started an hour ago.

Homer: It's just in one ear and out the other with you, isn't it, Marge?

wnolan1992

Lisa: [sarcastically] Well the wonders of the modern age now!
Homer: Wonders Lisa? Or blunders?
Lisa: That's what I implied (paraphrase).
Homer: Implied? Or implode?
Lisa: Mom, make him stop!

Summer wind

I never apologise.......I'm sorry that's just the way I am.

Homer Simpson.

Orim

Nobody snuggles with Max Power, Marge. You strap yourself in and feel the Gs.

corblimey

You know, Fox turned into a hard core sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice.

Royce McCutcheon

I don't like the idea of Milhouse having two spaghetti meals in one day.

ivytwine

corblimey wrote: »

You know, Fox turned into a hard core sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice.

But why?! She's such a fox....

I mean, what's on Fox tonight? Something ribald, no doubt!

alkymalky

Dental plan episode on Sky1 now!

Welsh Megaman

alkymalky wrote: »

Dental plan episode on Sky1 now!

Lisa needs braces!

csallmighty

"It was the best of times, it was the BLURST of times!"

ivytwine

Hired goons???

Dozen Wicked Words

Gloria: So.. what are you into?
Burns: In.. to?
Gloria: Yeah like.. what's a fun day for a hundred and four year old.
Burns: Oh I enjoy all the popular youth trends like uh.. piloting motor coaches and uuuh... collecting dog waste!


Wiggum: It's too dangerous. But I've got a sister you might like! She's completely hairless like those cats.
Burns: I don't care if she's Miss Hairless America. I'm spoken for. Step aside, I'll save Gloria myself.


Burns: Never forget Homer. There's no muscle stronger than the human heart.
Homer: What about the weiner? A guy on TV lifted a can of paint with his!


Oh, and anyone who doesn't know, the following site has brilliant mp3 clips of the quotable lines. This link for the best episode in season 13.
http://www.lardlad.com/assets/quotes/season13/CABF18.shtml