Dental plan!

EagererBeaver

Skylinehead wrote: »

"Well, my work is done here"

"What do you mean, my work is done here? You didn't do anything!"

"Didn't I?"

Anchor?! Anchor, let's see...

Think harder Homer.

corblimey

Marge: Homey, you know, it's funny. Both my mother and your father seem pretty lonely.
Homer: Hee hee hee! That is funny.

dr.fuzzenstein

Need help, does anyone recognise what I think is a quote by Lisa along the lines of "it adds a new dimension of terror to poverty".
Am I imagining things? I've googled it but found nada.

Reiver

Dirty Dingus McGee wrote: »

A Solar eclipse. The Cosmic ballet goes on.

Does anyone wanna switch seats?

Beanntraigheach

Springfield will have its first annual "Do What You Feel" festival this Saturday, whenever you feel like showing up.
It will be a welcome change from our annual "Do As We Say" festival, started by German settlers in 1946.

Cold War Kid

Marge, you can't go out on Saturday - that's our special night.

What's so special about it?

What's so...?! Oh... I don't know, a little show called Dr. Quinn: Medicine Woman? :rolleyes:

custard gannet

Behind these doors a federal judge will ladle out bowls of rich, creamy justice, in a case the media have dubbed "beat up waiter". This reporter suggested "waitergate", but was shouted down at the press club.

Orim

Dr. Hibbert: That's monstrous! I'll have no part of it.
Homer: Can you recommend a doctor that will?
Dr. Hibbert: ...Yes

Jump to ->

Dr. Nick: Hi Everybody!

dr.fuzzenstein

Dr. Nick: “Now, there are many options available for dangerously underweight individuals like yourself

suicide_circus

Rainer Wolfcastle: The film is just me in front of a brick wall for an hour and a half. It cost 80 million dollars.

Orim

suicide_circus wrote: »

Rainer Wolfcastle: The film is just me in front of a brick wall for an hour and a half. It cost 80 million dollars.

Jay: How do you sleep at night?

corblimey

With the bridge gone and the airport unfortunately on the other side of the bridge, a number of citizens are attempting to jump the gorge with their cars. It's a silent testament to the never-give-up and never-think-things-out spirit of our citizens.

AlmightyCushion

Orim wrote: »

Jay: How do you sleep at night?

On top of a pile of money, with many beautiful women.

Rawr

Orim wrote: »

Jay: How do you sleep at night?

Ranier Wolfcastle: Sherman, I just realised you insulted me. [He pulls out a rifle]. Now you must die!

Jay Sherman: Hey McBain, your shoe's untied.

Ranier Wolfcastle: From here, they appear to be tied, but I will go in for a closer look.

(Sherman calls for a taxi and leaves)

(hours later)

Ranier Wolfcastle: ...on closer inspection, these are loafers.

corblimey

Milhouse, lower those eyebrows! (he lowers one) And the other one!

dr.fuzzenstein

The bartender even looks like John Travolta!
Yeah. Looks like.

suicide_circus

No more pills or alcohol,
No more pot or demerol,
No more stinkin' fun at all!

RhubarbCrumble

"Lisa, stop blowing my sex. Your sax, your sax, stop blowing your sax!"

corblimey

Marge: So... you want to go on tour with a travelling freak show.
Homer: I don't think I have a choice, Marge.
Marge: Of course you have a choice.
Homer: How do you figure?
Marge: You don't have to join a freak show just because the opportunity came along.
Homer: You know, Marge, in some ways, you and I are very different people.

Professey Chin

Rev. Lovejoy: No Homer, God didn't burn your house down, but he was working in the hearts of your friends be they Christian, Jew, or... miscellaneous.
Apu: Hindu. There are seven hundred million of us.
Rev. Lovejoy: Aww, that's super.

dr.fuzzenstein

corblimey wrote: »

Marge: So... you want to go on tour with a travelling freak show.
Homer: I don't think I have a choice, Marge.
Marge: Of course you have a choice.
Homer: How do you figure?
Marge: You don't have to join a freak show just because the opportunity came along.
Homer: You know, Marge, in some ways, you and I are very different people.

I love this so much, I have to quote it, because it is just so awesome!

Rawr

Troy McClure: Hello, everybody. I'm Troy McClure star of such films as 'P' Is For Psycho and The President's Neck Is Missing.
But now I'm here to tell you about a remarkable new invention.

(Picks up orange and presses it into his eye-socket)
Troy McClure:Until now, this was the only way to get juice from an orange. But that's all changed-- thanks to the Juice Loosener.
Let's meet the inventor, Dr. Nick Riviera.

Dr. Nick Hello, Troy. Hi, everybody!

Everybody: Hi, Dr. Nick!

Dr. Nick: Troy, would you like a glass of orange juice?

Troy McClure: I sure would. But won't we have to pay those outrageous grocery-store prices for something the farmer probably spit in?

Dr. Nick: Not anymore! All thanks to the new Juice Loosener.

(Fills Juice Loosener with a bag of oranges and switches it on.

Troy McClure: DOCTOR, ARE YOU SURE IT'S ON? I CAN'T HEAR A THING!!!

Dr. Nick: IT'S WHISPER QUIET!

(A single drop of Orange Juice falls into the glass.)
Troy McClure: Wow! You got all that from one bag of oranges?

Dr. Nick: That's right. Order now and you'll also get Sun 'n' Run the suntan lotion that's also a laxative.

dr.fuzzenstein

"Peoples' Choice Awards" is America's greatest honor.
Styrofoam is not made from kittens.
The UFO was a paper plate.
The nerds on the Internet are not geeks.
The word "cheese" is not funny in and of itself.
The older Flanders boy is Todd, not Rod.
Lyndon Johnson did not provide the voice of Yosemite Sam.
If you are reading this, you have no life.
Roy Rogers was not buried in his horse.
The other UFO was an upside down salad spinner.
Our universities are not "hotbeds" of anything.
Mr. Dershowitz did not literally have four eyes.
Our viewers are not pathetic sexless food tubes.
Audrey Hepburn never weighed 400 pounds.
The "Cheers" gang is not a real gang.
Salt water does not chase the thirsties away.
Licking an electrical outlet will not turn you into a Mighty Morphing Power Ranger.
Cats do not eventually turn into dogs.
Bullets do not bounce off of fat guys.
Recycling does not deplete the ozone.
Everything is 10% fruit juice.
The flesh eating virus does not hide in ice cream.
Janet Reno is evil.
V8 juice is not 1/8 gasoline.
Ted Koppel is a robot.
Women aren't from Venus and men aren't form Mars.
Fleiss does floss.
Quayle is familiar with common bathroom procedures.
Bart is bad to the bone.
Godfry Jones' wife is cheating on him.
The Beatles haven't reunited to enter kick boxing competitions.
The "Bug" on your TV screen can see into your home.
Everyone on TV is better than you.
The people who are writing this have no life.

custard gannet

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

The bartender even looks like John Travolta!
Yeah. Looks like.

That accent:pac::pac:

letsseehere14

I don't think I was rehabilitated but ughhh I guess they needed the extra bed.

Beanntraigheach

Some folk'll never eat a skunk but then again some folk'll
like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel.

reap-a-rat

Beanntraigheach wrote: »

Some folk'll never eat a skunk but then again some folk'll
like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel.

Some folk'll never lose a toe but then again some folk'll, like Cletus the Slack-jawed Yokel.

wnolan1992

reap-a-rat wrote: »

Some folk'll never lose a toe but then again some folk'll, like Cletus the Slack-jawed Yokel.

HEY MAW! GET OFF THE DANG ROOF!

dr.fuzzenstein

Oh boy, that monkey is going to pay.

Welsh Megaman

Marge, can you set the oven to cold?