Dental plan!

corblimey

Skinner: Is this how you imagined your life, Edna?
Krabappel: Well yes, but then I was a very depressed child.

Riddle101

Always loved Moe's reactions to Bart's prank phonecalls.

"You little S.O.B.! If I ever find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!"

"Wait a minute! Listen to me, you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead. I swear I'm going to slice your heart in half!"

"Oh wait a minute! Jacques Stra... It's you, isn't it, you cowardly little runt?! When I get a hold of you, I am going to gut you like a fish and drink your blood!"

"Listen to me you, when I catch you, I'm going to pull out your eyes and shove 'em down your pants so you can watch me kick the crap out of you, okay?! Then I'm going to use your tongue to paint my boat!"

"Wait a minute! Listen, you little yellow-bellied rat jackass, if I ever find out who you are, I'll kill you!"

"Listen, you lousy bum, if I ever get a hold of you, I swear I'll cut your belly open!"

"Wait a minute! Listen to me, you little scum sucking pus bucket! When I get my hands on you, I'm going to put out your eyeballs with a cork screw!"

"Oh no! You rotten little punk! If I ever get a hold of you, I'll sink my teeth into your cheek and rip your face off!"

"Listen to me, you little puke. One of these days, I'm going to catch you, and when i do I'm going to carve my name on your back with an ice pick!

"Oh it's you isn't it?! Listen you, when I get a hold of you, I'm going to use your head for a bucket and paint my house with your brains!"

"Oh, do, that little, ooh.. I'm going to drive a golden spike where your Union meets your Central Pacific!"

What?! How dare you! If I ever find out who this is, I'll staple a flag on your butt, and mail you to Iran!"

"Wait a minute... If I ever get a hold of you... I will thank you for showing me the futility of human endeavor."

"Why you... I'm going to chop you into little pieces and make you into a Rubik’s Cube which I would never solve!"

Realt Dearg Sec

Technically, homer said the third last of those to Moe, but yeah those are great.

Realt Dearg Sec

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

Technically, homer said the third last of those to Moe, but yeah those are great.

In episode 2F09, when Itchy plays Scratchy's skeleton like a xylophone, he strikes the same rib in succession, yet he produces two clearly different tones. I mean, what are we to believe, that this is a magic xylophone, or something? Ha ha, boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.

Realt Dearg Sec

[Deleted User] wrote: »

In episode 2F09, when Itchy plays Scratchy's skeleton like a xylophone, he strikes the same rib in succession, yet he produces two clearly different tones. I mean, what are we to believe, that this is a magic xylophone, or something? Ha ha, boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.

I withdraw my question.

corblimey

Our city will not negotiate with terrorists! Is there a city nearby that will?

Rawr

Beanntraigheach wrote: »

MONO = ONE
RAIL = RAIL

..and that concludes our extensive three-week course.

jamesbere

I know you can read my thoughts boy, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.

corblimey

Cecil: I am Springfield's chief hydrological and hydrodynamical engineer.
Bob: Hydrological and hydrodynamical? Talk about running the gamut.

Beanntraigheach

Homer: I wonder why he's so eager to go to the garage.
Moe: The "garage", hey fellas, the "garage"! Well oo-la-di-da Mr. Frenchman!
Homer: Well what do you call it?
Moe: A car-hole!

Padkir

jamesbere wrote: »

I know you can read my thoughts boy, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.

I counted the meows before I could thank it. You've earned my respect!

corblimey

Lighthearted apron not included. Snapping fingers may not make food appear.

Dirty Dingus McGee

"I work like a Japanese beaver!"

A phrase I use all the time now.It's even on my CV.

dr.fuzzenstein

Homer: Look at those poor saps back on land with their "laws" and "ethics". They'll never know the simple joys of a monkey knife fight.

Realt Dearg Sec

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Homer: Look at those poor saps back on land with their "laws" and "ethics". They'll never know the simple joys of a monkey knife fight.

A homosexual party boat. They always have the nicest things.

banquo

Proud to say this is my LinkedIn profile:

The_Valeyard

banquo wrote: »

Proud to say this is my LinkedIn profile:

All right, let's see... "It was the best of times, it was the BLURST of times?" You stupid monkey.

corblimey

You know what you two need? A little comic strip called "Love Is..." It's about two naked eight-year-olds who are married.
(long pause)

Beanntraigheach

There, pretty as a picture.
Ach, zombies!
There, pretty as a picture.

RainyDay

Homer (in Moes, with a barrel over his head): Look at me, I'm the Irish Prime Minister.

strawdog

Moe closes down his Family Feedbag.

Moe: Go on, take it all. Get it all out of here.
Barney: You know, Moe, you might wanna keep the fire extinguishers.
Moe: Nah. Too many bad memories.
Barney: Well, look at the bright side, Moe: you still got us.
Moe: Yeah. Yeah, you know, that -- that actually makes me feel a
little better.
Homer: Why? That was the problem in the first place: you were going
broke because we were your only customers.
[Moe stares down, depressed]
Wasn't that the problem in the first place? That you were
going broke?
[Moe doesn't move a muscle]
Moe? Moe? Hey, Moe? Oh, you're thinking about all the money
you blew, aren't you?
[Moe nods]
What was it? Fifty, sixty thousand dollars? Moe? Look, maybe
it would help if you went over all the mistakes you made from
the beginning. Moe?
Moe: [finally loses it] What?!
Homer: Let me get a pad.

Froshtbit

RainyDay wrote: »

Homer (in Moes, with a barrel over his head): Look at me, I'm the Irish Prime Minister.

Prime minister of Ireland.

Realt Dearg Sec

Froshtbit wrote: »

Prime minister of Ireland.

In episode 2F09, when Itchy plays Scratchy´s skeleton like a xylophone, he strikes the same rib twice in succession, yet he produces two clearly different tones. I mean, what are we to believe, that this is some sort of a (laughs) magic xylophone or something? Boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.

[Mother sent me this same message last week. She was right to do it.]

corblimey

Homer: Yes, son, you can have an electric guitar just like your old man.
Bart: Dad, I'm asking if I can get a job.
Homer: Gig, son. When you're a musician, a job is called a "gig."

Rawr

Skinner: Up yours, children!
[Rides off on motorcycle]

You know, the door was open, Chief Break-everything!

corblimey

Skinner: Mother's gone too far. She's put cardboard over her half of the television. We rented Man Without a Face. I didn't even know he had a problem! What should I do?
Rev.Lovejoy: Well, maybe you should read your Bible.
Skinner: Um, any particular passage?
Rev.Lovejoy: Oh, it's all good.

Realt Dearg Sec

I'm trying mother!

You're failing, Seymour. What is it about you and failure?




Agnes has so many fantastic lines.

corblimey

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

I'm trying mother!

You're failing, Seymour. What is it about you and failure?




Agnes has so many fantastic lines.

Skinner: I'm not principal of the line, mother.
Agnes: And you never will be.

Omackeral

corblimey wrote: »

Skinner: I'm not principal of the line, mother.
Agnes: And you never will be.

It's the cutting delivery of that second line that makes it what it is.




I loved when he was trying to catch Bart bunking off school and was on his trail and found chewing gum.

Skinner (tasting the gum): Double mint. Trying to double your fun, eh Bart? ......I really wish more people heard that.