Dental plan!

Limerick Dude

Rega wrote: »

Out with the old in with the nucleus

*laughs uncontrollably*

"DROPPED HIS NOTES"

corblimey

Lisa: I believe you're required to provide a vegetarian alternative.
(Lunchlady Doris picks up a hot dog in a bun, shakes the weiner out, and slaps the bun down on Lisa's tray)
Doris: Yum. It's rich in bunly goodness.
Lisa: Do you remember when you lost your passion for this work?

jazz101

So I said to him, 'Look, buddy. Your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that."

Rawr

Goodnight Springton! There will be no encores!

corblimey

Oh hello, Principal Skinner. No, Bart has never been to Hong Kong. Good night.

Tennessee State Police? No, my son's car was not crushed in Knoxville. I don't know where to begin telling you what's wrong with that.

No, Bart is not available tomorrow to deliver a human kidney to Amsterdam.

Homer, are you laughing at me?

RainyDay

Mr. Burns: No one says I can't buy a second grade election. Why, I had enough money to fix People Magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive." [He shows off his sexy cover on his People Magazine] Most of the money went to convincing them that I was alive.

Nerdkiller1991

Beanntraigheach

Bart: People of Springfield, Whacking Day is a sham! It was started in 1924 as an excuse to beat up the Irish.

Irish Caricature: 'Tis true. I took many a lump, but 'twas all in good fun!"

paddylonglegs

Crippled Irishman: oh mr burns sir. Aaaah, ooooh, no. Ah, the legs god gave me!

EagererBeaver

jazz101 wrote: »

So I said to him, 'Look, buddy. Your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that."

"Coping with loss"

Dirty Dingus McGee

Mr Burns:Well let's look at the contract ourselves. (reading) Benefits? Perks? A green cookie on Saint Patrick's Day? Ho ho, it didn't used to be this way, Smithers. No, it didn't used to be this way at all...

Beanntraigheach

paddylonglegs wrote: »

Crippled Irishman: oh mr burns sir. Aaaah, ooooh, no. Ah, the legs god gave me!

Who'll provide for me little ones?!

IvySlayer

Moe: Listen up, this is the busiest drinking day of the year. Where are the designated drivers? [Two guys raise their hands] Beat it! I got no room for cheapskates

Marge: What happened to you, Homer? And what have you done to the car?
Homer: Nothing.
Marge: I don't think it had broken axles before.
Homer: Before, before! You're living in the past, Marge! Quit living in the past!

corblimey

Moe: Aw, c'mon, look at me. I'm a gargoyle. What with the cauliflower ear, there, and the lizard lips...
Carl: Little rat eyes...
Homer: Caveman brow...
Lenny: Don't forget that fish snout.
Moe: Okay, I get it. I ain't pleasant to look at.
Lenny: Or listen to.
Carl: Or be with.

razorblunt

Brad: We can all learn a lot from this young man here, this... this...
Bart: Rudiger.
Brad: Rudiger. And if we can all be more like little Rudiger.
Marge: His name is Bart.
Brad: His name's not important.

corblimey

Lou: You know, the funniest thing though; it's the little differences.
Wiggum: Example.
Lou: Well, at McDonald's you can buy a Krusty Burger with cheese, right? But they don't call it a Krusty Burger with cheese.
Wiggum: Get out! Well, what do they call it?
Lou: A Quarter Pounder with cheese.
Wiggum: Quarter Pounder with cheese? Well, I can picture the cheese, but, uh, do they have Krusty partially gelatinated non-dairy gum-based beverages?
Lou: Mm-hm. They call 'em, "shakes."
Eddie: Huh, shakes. You don't know what you're gettin'.

corblimey

Don't you hate pants?

EagererBeaver

corblimey wrote: »

Don't you hate pants?

This gets me every time. Incredible line, the way be shouts it from the back of the room, the timing, the quick follow up to the convo with Carl and Lenny. Everything about is perfect. One of the best ever.

razorblunt

EagererBeaver wrote: »

This gets me every time. Incredible line, the way be shouts it from the back of the room, the timing, the quick follow up to the convo with Carl and Lenny. Everything about is perfect. One of the best ever.

There's a few of those throwaway lines that never lose their funny.
There's another in the episode where the heating in the Church has broker an Lovejoy on the altar passes comment on it to which someone off screen shouts:

"yeah, what's up with that?"

I think I use that regularly.

paddylonglegs

razorblunt wrote: »

There's a few of those throwaway lines that never lose their funny.
There's another in the episode where the heating in the Church has broker an Lovejoy on the altar passes comment on it to which someone off screen shouts:

"yeah, what's up with that?"

I think I use that regularly.

It's actually "yeah, what's the story?" But I'll let it slide this time...

Realt Dearg Sec

paddylonglegs wrote: »

It's actually "yeah, what's the story?" But I'll let it slide this time...

I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder.

letsseehere14

The British tabloids will have a field day

corblimey

As for Science versus Religion, I'm issuing a restraining order. Religion must stay 500 yards from Science at all times.

corblimey

Thirty-five years in show business and already no one remembers me.
just like what's-his-name and whosits and, you know, that guy, always wore a shirt...?

corblimey

Well if no-one else is going to do it...

corblimey wrote: »

Thirty-five years in show business and already no one remembers me.
just like what's-his-name and whosits and, you know, that guy, always wore a shirt...?

And now, the Crazy Old Man Singers!

wnolan1992

corblimey wrote: »

Well if no-one else is going to do it...



And now, the Crazy Old Man Singers!

Up until like last year, I always thought they were singing:

"Old Grandma she ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be."

corblimey

Tangentially related to the day that's in it...

TV: The following is a public service announcement. Excessive alcohol consumption can cause liver damage and cancer of the rectum.
Homer: Mmmmm... beer...

corblimey

Homer: Hey kids, wanna drive through that cactus patch?
Bart: Yeah!
Lisa: Yeah!
Sideshow Bob: (from under the car) No!
Homer: Well, two against one!

corblimey

Homer: Marge, you're standing in the way of my boyhood dream of managing a beautiful country singer!
Marge: Your boyhood dream is to eat the world's biggest hoagie! And you did it at the county fair last year, remember!?

Realt Dearg Sec

Only WHO can prevent forest fires?
*Bart presses YOU*
You have selected you, referring to me. That is incorrect. The correct answer is you.