Dental plan!

bluecatmorgana

Doctor: you can expect to go through five stages. The first is denial...
Homer: no way because I'm not dying.....
Doctor: second is anger......
Homer: why you litttle! arrrrgghh..
Doctor: after that comes fear....
Homer: whats after fear?! whats after fear?!
Doctor: bargaining...
Homer: Doc you gotta get me outta this, I'll make it worth your while.
Doctor: finally....acceptance..
Homer: well we all gotta go sometime..

bluecatmorgana

click click click!
Gun shop owner: woah! careful there Annie Oakley.
Homer: I dont have to be careful I Have a gun!

bluecatmorgana

fiddledee, that will require a tetnus shot

myflipflops

Sometimes life is just one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

bluecatmorgana

default?! whoohoooo! The two sweetest words in the English language!

De fault!
De fault!
De fault!

Bart: Hello, I'm Doctor Hibbert. I'm afraid I'm going to have to amputate... your butt.

Milhouse: All right, if you think you must.

take everything

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Never liked that episode.

Johnny Favourite

doh

Sam Vimes

sponsoredwalk wrote: »

Remember, yor job and the future of your family hinges on your successful
completion of nuclear physics 101. Oh, and one more thing, you must find
the jade monkey before the next full moon.

Smithers: Sir we found the jade monkey. It was in the glove compartment
Burns: And the ice scraper? And the road maps?
Smithers: They were in there too
Burns: Excellent. It's all falling into place

ashblag

Mr burns::D
Some men like to hunt for sport,
Others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for,
Is an outfit that looks good...

See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish setter.

See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.

Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle
It shall rest,

Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest,
See my vest.

Like my loafers? Former gophers -
It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo
Would be best,

So let's prepare these dogs,
Mrs. Potts: Kill two for matching clogs,
Burns: See my vest, see my vest,
Oh please, won't you see my vest

I really like the vest.................

Galway K9

Lord, as an offering i have this cookies and milk, if you wolike me to eat them for you give me no sign....that will be done! NYOM!:D

IvySlayer

Smithers there's a rocket in my pocket.

The_g-man

Grampa: Son, you've got to marry that girl!
Homer: Because it's the honorable thing to do?
Grampa: [slams his hand on the table] No, because you'll never do any better. Ha ha, you lucky bum! The fish jumped right in the boat, and all you gotta do is whack her with the oar!


Homer: Step aside. I'll deliver this baby.
Dr. H: Uh, why don't you let me handle it, Homer?
Homer: Oh, a college boy, eh?


Herbert: While you're here, I want you to make yourselves right at home. Any time you're hungry, any time day or night, Cook will make you anything you want.
Homer: Even pork chops?
Herbert: Absolutely. We have a tennis court, a swimming pool, a screening room...
Homer: If I want pork chops any time in the middle of the night, your guy will fry them up?
Herbert: Sure, that's what he's paid for. Now, if you need towels, laundry, maids...
Homer: Wait, wait, wait. Lemme see if I got this straight. It's Christmas Day, 4am, there's a rumble in my stomach...
Marge: Homer, please.

Galway K9

I think the best gag they kept runnign was Sideshow Bob and stepping on the rakes!

*smack* UHHHHHAAAARRRRRRHHHHH!:D

ashblag

Homer:You'll have to speak up, i'm wearing a towel!

Cranky Mc Funhouse

You see my wife has been most vocal on the subject of the pretzel monies.. ''Where is the pretzel money?, When are you going to get the pretzel money? Why aren't you getting the pretzel money right now?'' and so on..

krudler

I love Fat Tony

"we dont get even, we get stabby"

"the kiss of death, well thats all I need!"

Busi_Girl08

"Just plop them in front of the TV. I was raised with the TV and I turned out TV"

"A hoy hoy?"
"Greetings friend. Do you wish to looks as happy as me? Well, you've got the power inside you right now. So use it. Just send $1 to Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don't delay! Eternal happiness is just $1 away"
"Hm..eternal happiness for a dollar....Eeeeh I'd rather keep the dollar."

laurashambles

Kent Brockman: While we speak in an educated manner, they tend to use low brow expressions like "oh yeah?" and " c'mere a minute".

Homer: Oh yeah? They think they're better than us, huh? Bart, c'mere a minute.
Bart: You c'mere a minute.
Homer: Oh yeah?? *shakes fist*

take everything

"Shake harder, boy!"

Adyx

Homer: "Sure, I told him that I loved him...but I never told him I was IN love with him".

Chief Wiggum: "Hey that's my line! Bake him away toys!"

My two favourites, can't believe they weren't posted.

davetherave

Go Banana!


Willie: Check out the Willie world news. I review the new tractors. They're all ****e.

xzanti

I thought you said he was dead?

No, I said he sleeps with the fishes...

Ewww

Busi_Girl08

"Hey there, computer geek. You will be connected in no time.."

Sofiztikated

Adyx wrote: »

Homer: "Sure, I told him that I loved him...but I never told him I was IN love with him".

Chief Wiggum: "Hey that's my line! Bake him away toys!"

My two favourites, can't believe they weren't posted.

The wiggum quote has been. Many times at this stage.

Seosaimh77

Two! Four! Six! Eight!
Homer's crime was very great!

"Great" meaning "large" or "immense",
We use it in the pejorative sense!

krudler

Seosaimh77 wrote: »

Two! Four! Six! Eight!
Homer's crime was very great!

"Great" meaning "large" or "immense",
We use it in the pejorative sense!

Love that joke

Cant sleep, clown'll eat me...

Busi_Girl08

"Hello mudda, hello fadda, here I am at...Camp Grenada!"
"Marge? Is Lisa at Camp Grenada?"

Seosaimh77

Wont someone please think of the children

krudler

Busi_Girl08 wrote: »

"Hello mudda, hello fadda, here I am at...Camp Grenada!"
"Marge? Is Lisa at Camp Grenada?"

"gotta change that tape, dear god I've gotta change that tape!"
"gotta change Maggie, dear god gotta change Maggie!"