Dental plan!

KeithM89_old

From halloween special:
"Another local peasant has been found dead, drained of his blood with two teeth marks on his throat. This black cape was found on the scene. [The cape says "DRACULA."] Police are baffled."

SeaFields

They hired me for my motivational skills. Everyone at work says they have to work much harder when I'm around

Homer J. Simpson.

Horse_box

Kent Brockman: Now, this technology is new to me, but...I'm pretty sure that's Homer Simpson in the oven, rotating slowly. His body temperature has risen to over 400 degrees - he's literally stewing in his own juices.

KeithM89_old

"Ladies and gentlemen, uh, we've just lost the picture, but what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has apparently been taken over- 'conquered' if you will- by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive Earthman or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves"

Galway K9

KeithM89 wrote: »

"Ladies and gentlemen, uh, we've just lost the picture, but what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has apparently been taken over- 'conquered' if you will- by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive Earthman or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves"

"HAIL ANTS!"

klose

Simpsons christmas boogy!

derfderf

KnifeWRENCH wrote: »

Out wit ze old, in vit ze nucleus.

BAHAHAHA, he dropped his papers.

talla10

Marge; Homer it's supposed to be leather patches on a tweed blazer not the other way round. You've ruined a perfectly good jacket!

Homer; Correction Marge ; Two perfectly good jackets!

----

Apu; There he is. The head of Kwik E Mart corporations worldwide, He is who i must ask for my job back.

Kwik E Mart Head; You many ask me three questions.

Apu; Well good because i only have one question.

Homer; Are you the head of the Kwik E Mart?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes

Homer; Really?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes

Homer; You?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes. Thank you my children i hope this has been fulfilling. Thank you come again.

Apu; Well i need...

Kwik E Mart Head; Thank you come again

Apu; But..

Kwik E Mart Head; Thank you come again.

Homer (outside) ; Well that was a waste of time. was he really the head of the Kwik E Mart?

the purple tin

Ned- kids, did anyone pray for giant shoes?
Rod- I did.
Ned- well okaley dokaley.

silverspoon

Can I borrow a feelin'?
Could you send me a jar of love?
Hurtin' hearts need some healin',
Take my hand with your glove of love!

Superbus

silverspoon wrote: »

Can I borrow a feelin'?
Could you send me a jar of love?
Hurtin' hearts need some healin',
Take my hand with your glove of love!

Kirk van Houten won the 1000th post lottery.

He better get paid.

sheesh

talla10 wrote: »

Marge; Homer it's supposed to be leather patches on a tweed blazer not the other way round. You've ruined a perfectly good jacket!

Homer; Correction Marge ; Two perfectly good jackets!

----

Apu; There he is. The head of Kwik E Mart corporations worldwide, He is who i must ask for my job back.

Kwik E Mart Head; You many ask me three questions.

Apu; Well good because i only have one question.

Homer; Are you the head of the Kwik E Mart?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes

Homer; Really?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes

Homer; You?

Kwik E Mart Head; Yes. Thank you my children i hope this has been fulfilling. Thank you come again.

Apu; Well i need...

Kwik E Mart Head; Thank you come again

Apu; But..

Kwik E Mart Head; Thank you come again.

Homer (outside) ; Well that was a waste of time. was he really the head of the Kwik E Mart?

Shut up shut up you stupid fat man.

That_Guy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQW2t4SxvJ0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4w3zdkmw2E4

krudler

to beat Flanders, you have to think like Flanders!
"I'm a big four eyed lamo, and I wear the same stupid sweater every d-"
To the river!

Wossack

krudler wrote: »

to beat Flanders, you have to think like Flanders!
"I'm a big four eyed lamo, and I wear the same stupid sweater every d-"
To the river!

Bart: Wow Dad, you took a baptism for me. How do you feel?
Homer: Oh, Bartholomew, I feel like St. Augustine of Hippo after his conversion by the Ambrose of Milan
Ned: Wait! Homer, what did you just say?
Homer: I said shut your ugly face, Flanders!
Ned: Oh fair enough

Gunsfortoys

"Well McGarnigle, Jimmy is DEAD!! They slit his throat from ear to ear"

McGarnigle: "Hey! Im trying to eat lunch here!"

"You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel."

talla10

silverspoon wrote: »

Can I borrow a feelin'?
Could you send me a jar of love?
Hurtin' hearts need some healin',
Take my hand with your glove of love!

BAA-HAAA!!!It's got your picture on it!!!

Deeper Blue

Grampa: "I'm not sorry I had you, son. I was always proud....that you weren't a short man."



Homer: "Look Marge, you don't know what it's like. I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order. The whole freaking system is out of order. You want the truth? You want the truth?! You can't handle the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown."

Tom Slick

Arrr, I hate the sea and everything in it!

Busi_Girl08

Flanders - "Knock that off, you two, it's time for church!"
Todd - "We're not going to church today!"
Flanders - "WHAT?! Give me one good reason!"
Rod - "It's Saturday!!"
Flanders - "Oakily dokily doo!!!"

yeppydeppy

I've got a lot of hearsay and conjecture, those are kinds of evidence.

yeppydeppy

Mr. Burns: Yes, I'm a wealthy man but I'd gladly give it all away for just a little more.

and another one:
Mr. Burns: That excellent was excellent!

KeithM89_old

It's like a freakin' Country Bear Jambaroo around here!

talla10

Homer; So if we're 'deadlocked' we have to become 'stranded' at a four star hotel where we will receive free room, free food ohh free willy!

Principal Skinner; Justice has nothing to do with a disobedient whale, Simpson, now vote!!

Homer; How are the rest of you voting?

Jury; Guilty!!

Homer (writing); How many s's in innocent?

Jury groans

Homer; Well I'm sorry but i think Freddie Quimby should walk out of here a free hotel!

---

Mayor Quimby doesn't believe in law and order. He believes violent criminals should be allowed roam the streets ready to strike again!He even released Sideshow Bob a man twice convicted of attempted murder!....Vote Sideshow Bob if you were running for Mayor he'd vote for you!

Ulysses Gaze

Homer: The experts say that if you want an animal to do something, you should do it yourself first to show him how.
Marge: (angry) I'm not going to the bathroom in the backyard!
Homer: Sorry, your majesty.

rcaz

Busi_Girl08 wrote: »

Flanders - "Knock that off, you two, it's time for church!"
Todd - "We're not going to church today!"
Flanders - "WHAT?! Give me one good reason!"
Rod - "It's Saturday!!"
Flanders - "Oakily dokily doo!!!"

Hens love Roosters
Geese love Ganders
Everyone else loves Ned Flanders!

Gi joe!

My legs hurt.

talla10

Superintendent Chalmers; Oh my god man what is happening in your kitchen??

Skinner; The Aurora Borealis?

Superintendent Chalmers; The Aurora Borealis??At this time of day, this time of year in this part of the country localised entirely in your kitchen???

Skinner; Yes

Superintendent Chalmers; May i see it?

Skinner; No.

Tom Slick

~
// r `justice