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Dental plan!

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    #1982
    Lady von Purple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 318 ✭✭Lady von Purple


    justryan wrote: »
    Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail Monorail

    Mono... D'OH!!


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    #1983
    Funglegunk
    Registered Users Posts: 1,566 ✭✭✭Funglegunk


    Disco Stu: Did you know that disco record sales were up 400% for the year ending 1976? If these trends continue...eyyyyyyy!!


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    #1984
    Susie_Q
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,211 ✭✭✭Susie_Q


    I'm off to Emmet's Fix-it store to "fix" Emmet.


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    #1985
    MitchKoobski
    Registered Users Posts: 6,101 ✭✭✭MitchKoobski


    Homer: "Lisa, don't feel bad. Judas betrayed Jesus, but he still got paid."

    Skinner: "Ah, diorama-rama, my favorite school event next to Hearing-Test Thursday.”


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    #1986
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Local man loses pants, life
    Beaver rescue falls short

    Dog kills cat, self

    Man marries woman in wedding ceremony

    Big fat man has big fat heart
    Little thin man accused of robbery


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    #1987
    Sam Vimes
    Registered Users Posts: 21,611 ✭✭✭✭Sam Vimes


    Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.


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    #1988
    Sam Vimes
    Registered Users Posts: 21,611 ✭✭✭✭Sam Vimes


    Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!


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    #1989
    Sam Vimes
    Registered Users Posts: 21,611 ✭✭✭✭Sam Vimes


    And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker.


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    #1990
    Sam Vimes
    Registered Users Posts: 21,611 ✭✭✭✭Sam Vimes


    Krusty: Kids, we need to talk for a moment about Krusty Brand Chew Goo Gum Like Substance. We all knew it contained spider eggs, but the hantavirus? That came out of left field. So if you’re experiencing numbness and/or comas, send five dollars to antidote, PO box…


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    #1991
    Sam Vimes
    Registered Users Posts: 21,611 ✭✭✭✭Sam Vimes


    Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get.


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    #1992
    Funglegunk
    Registered Users Posts: 1,566 ✭✭✭Funglegunk


    Dudess wrote: »
    Local man loses pants, life
    Beaver rescue falls short

    Dog kills cat, self

    Man marries woman in wedding ceremony

    Big fat man has big fat heart
    Little thin man accused of robbery

    Human blimp sees flying saucer

    Franchise Fair - Where all your non-sexual dreams come true


    Sooo many great signage gags, going to have to start posting those too


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    #1993
    sensibleken
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,650 ✭✭✭sensibleken


    hey fatty, I got a movie for ya! 'a fridge too far'


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    #1994
    Susie_Q
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,211 ✭✭✭Susie_Q


    First I'll pull my legs out with my arms, then I'll pull my arms out with my face.


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    #1995
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    Ralph - Lisa,whats the answer to number 7?

    Lisa - Sorry Ralph,that would defeat the purpose of testing as a means of student evaluation.

    *pause*

    Ralph - My cats name is mittens.


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    #1996
    krudler
    Registered Users Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    sensibleken wrote: »
    hey fatty, I got a movie for ya! 'a fridge too far'

    its that guys voice that makes his lines funny.

    "I'm looking for a smart hamster"
    "This one writes mysteries under the name J.D. McGregor"
    "how can a hamster write mysteries?"
    "he starts with the ending then works his way backwards....look kid just buy before his mother eats him"


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    #1997
    Jordan 199
    Registered Users Posts: 11,940 ✭✭✭✭Jordan 199


    Whenever my faith in god is shaken, I think of the miracle of anti-freeze!

    -Cesar


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    #1998
    KnifeWRENCH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    Pelé is king of the soccer field. To be king of your kitchen, use Crestfield Wax Paper.


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    #1999
    Creature
    Registered Users Posts: 3,005 ✭✭✭Creature


    It's Krust-er-iffic Johnny Unitas, but is my top lip supposed to bleed like that?
    Probably.



    Spinning newspaper injures printer.


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    #2000
    Galway K9
    Registered Users Posts: 2,353 ✭✭✭Galway K9


    Mayor Quimby: "Ich bin ein Springfielder."
    Homer: "Mmmmm. Jelly Donuts."

    Very subtle one on the simpsons. Took me a few times to appreciate it.


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    #2001
    Susie_Q
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,211 ✭✭✭Susie_Q


    Shake harder, boy!


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    #2002
    Creature
    Registered Users Posts: 3,005 ✭✭✭Creature


    Woohoo! Look Marge, a couple of bucks!


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    #2003
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    "First consultation free, no money down."

    Oh I've been meaning to fix that:

    "First consultation free? No! Money down!"


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    #2004
    Creature
    Registered Users Posts: 3,005 ✭✭✭Creature


    Tonight on Action News, a tremendous EXPLOSION...in the price of lumber, president Reagen DIES...his hair. But first! Let's check the death count from the killer storm bearing down on us like a shotgun full of snow!


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    #2005
    dagdha
    Registered Users Posts: 645 ✭✭✭dagdha


    There's the truth :mad::mad: and the truth :D:D


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    #2006
    Dunny
    Registered Users Posts: 2,985 ✭✭✭Dunny


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RCs2RKiLlA


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    #2007
    derfderf
    Registered Users Posts: 1,588 ✭✭✭derfderf


    "Here the moment we've feared people. Many of you thought it would never happen but i insisted we train two hours every day for it. You all thought i was mad, many of you requested a transfer to another peanut factory. But now....CRASH"


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    #2008
    foxyboxer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,528 ✭✭✭foxyboxer


    On Marge's first day at the plant.

    "If anything goes wrong Marge always blame the guy who can't speak english....ah Tebor, how many times have you saved my butt"


    Later

    "I'm sick of people always getting promoted ahead of me, you, Carl, Tebor!"


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    #2009
    foxyboxer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,528 ✭✭✭foxyboxer


    Marge on the Lam. One of the best episodes. Not one dud joke.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6uto4wQY_g


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    #2010
    Sgt Hartman
    Registered Users Posts: 2,468 ✭✭✭Sgt Hartman


    Creature wrote: »
    It's Krust-er-iffic Johnny Unitas, but is my top lip supposed to bleed like that?
    Probably.



    Spinning newspaper injures printer.

    Grandpa: "Johnny Unitas? Now there's a haircut you could set your watch to!"


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    #2011
    the purple tin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,943 ✭✭✭✭the purple tin


    Lisa: Mom, there's a weird smell and a lot of cursing coming from the
    basement...and Dad's upstairs!


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