Dental plan!

IvyTheTerrible

The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now.

coonecb1

I love how the news guy in the helicopter's name is 'Arnie Pie'. They could have easily titled his segment, 'Pie in the Sky', but instead....


Kent Brockman: Now, let's go over live to Arnie Pie with 'Arnie in the Sky!'

Brendog

Oh no! that sinister looking kid is coming to kill me! HELP! HELP!!! *falls over*

Jordan 199

Marge: Careful now. These are dangerous streets for us upper-lower-middle-class types. So avoid all eye contact, watch your pocket, and suspect everyone.

Snake: Three card monte!

Homer: Woohoo! Easy Money!

Nervous Wreck

dan1895 wrote: »

Mr. Burns: I wonder if this Homer Nixon is any relation to Richard Nixon?

Smithers: I doubt it sir; they spell and pronounce their names differently.

corblimey

Thanks, Mayor Simpson! From now on, we'll all be taking golden showers!

timmy880

Kent Brockman: Tonight on Smartline, our report from the Middle East will not be seen, so that we may bring you a man who bought an ice cream cone.

Homer Simpson: That's me.

Kent Brockman: Of course, that has nothing to do with the fact that the ice cream parlor and this station are owned by the same company, but I digress.

Jordan 199

Homer: Wait a minute, there's something bothering me about this place. I know! This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit. Enjoy your death trap, ladies!

Woman: What's her problem?

Jordan 199

Freddy Quimby: Hey, what the hell is this?

Waiter: It's a bowl of Show-dair.

Freddy Quimby: Wait a minute. Come here. What did you call it? Say it loud enough for everyone to hear. Come on! Say it.

Waiter: Show-dair.

Freddy Quimby: "Show-dair?" "Show-dair?" It's "chowdah." Say it right.

Waiter: Show-dair.

Freddy Quimby: Come back here! I'm not through demeaning you.

Brendog

Who the hell is this guy?

Lionel Hutz court appointed attorney, I'll be defending you on the charge of...murder one! Wow even if I lose I'll be famous.

PrettyBoy

"I noticed he wore sneakers - for sneaking!"

(Grandpa on Molloy, the Cat Burglar)

Dunny

Homer: "Oh, look at me! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man - from Happyland! In a gum-drop house on Lollypop Lane! ... Oh, by the way, I was being sarcastic."

Marge: Well duh

corblimey

I'll take care of this! Jumaji! Does anything from the movies actually work?

sensibleken

Burns giving exercise classes: Push out the jive, bring in the love.

PrettyBoy

sensibleken wrote: »

Burns giving exercise classes: Push out the jive, bring in the love.

"SIX-HI-YI-YA!"

PrettyBoy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-E5NaWlBuc

Brendog

PrettyBoy wrote: »

"SIX-HI-YI-YA!"

"Give me a ride or everybody dies"

talla10

corblimey wrote: »

I'll take care of this! Jumaji! Does anything from the movies actually work?

FBI reading Homers mail; Look at this guy!! Some guys write to movie stars- he writes to movies. Dear Die Hard you rock!!

Glico Man

Eddie: Do you hold a grudge against Montgomery Burns?
Moe: No. [buzz] All right, maybe I did. But I didn't shoot him! [ding]
Eddie: Checks out. Okay, sir, you're free to go.
Moe: Good, 'cause I got a hot date tonight. [buzz] A date. [buzz] Dinner with friends. [buzz] Dinner alone. [buzz] Watching TV alone. [buzz] All right! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog! [buzz] Sears catalog. [ding] Now, would you unhook this already, please?! I don't deserve this kind of shabby treatment! [buzz]

coonecb1

[Homer and Marge visit Mr. Burns who is dressed for wrestling]

Mr Burns: Back when I wrestled at Yale, I was in the lightest weight category: "ether weight." Now, get ready to face the wrath of the "New Haven Nuisance!" Side-mount! Takedown! Advantage! Reversal! Reversal! Clinch! Clinch, I say!

Marge: Listen, I'm late for a PTA meeting.

Acacia

Moe: I'm so desperately lonely.

kieran26

Pumpkin sales have been goin up and up all through the month of October, i reckon they'll peak right around early january.

teddansonswig

Oh Smithers, I would have said anything to get your stem cells

the purple tin

The bone's the very thing, methinks, to prank my sister and the dink.

PrettyBoy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRsPheErBj8

dominiquecruz

Larry brings Homer to eat at Burns' mansion -

Mr. Burns: Does your son bring home nitwits and make you talk to them?
Homer: Oh, all the time! Have you ever heard of this kid Milhouse? He's a little weiner..

the purple tin

No one must know I dropped my glasses in the toilet. Not I, the man who drafted the Paris Peace Accord.

Fear Uladh

...and one more thing, you must find the jade monkey, before the next full moon.

Actually sir we found the jade monkey, he was in your glove box.

And road maps and ice scraper?

They were in there too sir.

Excellent, it allllll falling into place.

talla10

kieran26 wrote: »

Pumpkin sales have been goin up and up all through the month of October, i reckon they'll peak right around early january.

Homers Stockbroker; I keep telling you Simpson you gotta sell all your pumpkins by Halloween!!HALLOWEEN!!

Riddle101

talla10 wrote: »

FBI reading Homers mail; Look at this guy!! Some guys write to movie stars- he writes to movies. Dear Die Hard you rock!!

Especially with that guy in the elevator.

P.S Do you know Mad Max?