Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all! We have been experiencing an issue on site where threads have been missing the latest postings. The platform host Vanilla are working on this issue. A workaround that has been used by some is to navigate back from 1 to 10+ pages to re-sync the thread and this will then show the latest posts. Thanks, Mike.
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Film reviews, AH Style.

  • 06-10-2010 8:44pm
    #1
    google faps
    Closed Accounts Posts: 112 ✭✭


    MOD SNIP

    OP Banned for being a dick.


«13

Comments

  • #2
    Kasabian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,689 ✭✭✭Kasabian


    Why ruin all these movies for us that had not seen them?

    Seriously I wanted to watch Shutter Island.


  • #3
    KeithM89_old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,806 ✭✭✭✭KeithM89_old


    Transformers - Sh1t

    Transformers 2 - Sh1t


  • #4
    mstan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 286 ✭✭mstan


    Thanks for ruining a load of ****ing films for me


  • #5
    phasers
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,159 ✭✭✭✭phasers


    Those are called spoilers mate


  • #6
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    Avatar = Blue

    But not in the old fashioned meaning of blue in regard to films :D


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    Superbus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,784 ✭✭✭Superbus


    Godfather - too long; didn't watch


  • #8
    El Guapo!
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    District 9 -- Sh1te film with a poxy accent all the way through. "Fookin prawns"


  • #9
    Sticky_Fingers
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,379 ✭✭✭Sticky_Fingers


    One night in google faps mom
    > resultant offspring ruins a load of movies for people on the internet


  • #10
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    google faps wrote: »
    Donnie darko - F*ck knows.

    Spoilers ffs! :mad:


  • #11
    pablomakaveli
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,752 ✭✭✭pablomakaveli


    Snakes on a plane = does exactly what it says on the tin


  • Advertisement
  • #12
    clikityclak
    Registered Users Posts: 470 ✭✭clikityclak


    OP you just ruined Shutter Island for me, I didn't even have to click into the thread, boooooooooooooo:mad:


  • #13
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    Back to the future: midget nearly rides his ma


  • #14
    Micky Dolenz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 44,080 ✭✭✭✭Micky Dolenz


    It's Ok to look now. The OP had to leave


  • #15
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    There Will Be Blood : About a man who likes to drink milkshakes.


  • #16
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    about a boy = it's a film eh... about a boy


  • #17
    phasers
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,159 ✭✭✭✭phasers


    Mmmm milkshakes


    Citizen Kane: There are no canes.

    That doesn't work written down...


  • #18
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    Ghostbusters : Hamlet set in New York


  • #19
    Professional Griefer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,116 ✭✭✭Professional Griefer


    To the 2nd poster, I'm sorry that guy ruined shutter island.
    Without doubt one of my favourite movies of all time. fantastic.

    Freddy Got Fingered is also, quality:D


  • #20
    El Guapo!
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,438 ✭✭✭✭El Guapo!


    FERRIS BUELLERS DAY OFF = AWESOME!! :D


  • #21
    epgc3fyqirnbsx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,228 ✭✭✭epgc3fyqirnbsx


    The Never Ending Story

    It ended


  • Advertisement
  • #22
    dezzyd
    Closed Accounts Posts: 197 ✭✭dezzyd


    [Freddy Got Fingered is also, quality:D[/QUOTE]

    Don't know about the entire film but - "daddy would you like a sausage" still stays with me for some reason :confused:


  • #23
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    Football Factory - A film about football hooligan scumbags

    Texas Chainsaw Massacre - A film about murderous scumbags

    Dracula - A film about vampire scumbags

    Trainspotting - A film about junkie, dole scrounging scumbags

    Harry Potter - A film about magic student scumbags


  • #24
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    48 hours : 96 minutes.

    Another 48 Hours : 93 minutes.


  • #25
    King Felix
    Closed Accounts Posts: 532 ✭✭✭King Felix


    Mutiny on the Bounty.

    It's about a mutiny on the Bounty.


  • #26
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    Rocky = it's not about geology and it's not set in the mountains...


  • #27
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    King Felix wrote: »
    Mutiny on the Bounty.

    It's about a mutiny on the Bounty.

    Good movie. I got it in a boxset with Marathon Man, Galaxy Quest and Ghost of Mars.


  • #28
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    bonerm wrote: »
    Good movie. I got it in a boxset with Marathon Man, Galaxy Quest and Ghost of Mars.

    took a second .....

    most excellent :D


  • #29
    ascanbe
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,089 ✭✭✭ascanbe


    Titanic:
    the ship sinks

    The Passion of the Christ:
    doesn't end well for the titular character


  • #30
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    This reminds me of a one-word review I read of Dogville: "Dogsh1t".

    The Breakfast Club:
    80s emo chick becomes jockette by lunchtime, snogs jock; pampered prom queen princess and jaded bad boy from the wrong side of the tracks who despise each other... snog by lunchtime; virginal nerd... remains virginal nerd.


  • Advertisement
  • #31
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    Yisroel Attractive Chair wrote: »
    The Never Ending Story

    It ended

    I think there was

    The Never Ending Story 2

    Then it ended ...


  • #32
    King Felix
    Closed Accounts Posts: 532 ✭✭✭King Felix


    bonerm wrote: »
    Good movie. I got it in a boxset with Marathon Man, Galaxy Quest and Ghost of Mars.

    A good selection.


  • #33
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    There was a Neverending Story III... then it was realised that the franchise had gone from awesome to lame.


  • #34
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    Dudess wrote: »
    There was a Neverending Story III... then it was realised that the franchise had gone from awesome to lame.

    Will it never end? :p


  • #35
    Kasabian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,689 ✭✭✭Kasabian


    Dudess wrote: »
    There was a Neverending Story III... then it was realised that the franchise had gone from awesome to lame.

    The hint was in the title.


  • #36
    bonerm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭bonerm


    Dudess wrote: »
    There was a Neverending Story III... then it was realised that the franchise had gone from awesome to lame.

    It's usually a bad sign when the best thing in your film is Jack Black.


  • Advertisement
  • #37
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    This one sticks in my mind
    Lindy West, on Sex in the City II wrote:
    If this is what modern womanhood means, then just fucking veil me and sew up all my holes
    http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/burkas-and-birkins/Content?oid=4132715


  • #38
    DazMarz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭DazMarz


    Top Gun: a bunch of closeted homosexuals fly around in big, long, hard metal things and flirt with each other when they're on the ground.

    Escape From New York: he escapes

    Escape From L.A.: he escapes... again... but it's not as fun this time

    The Matrix: he shoulda took the blue pill...

    Gone In 60 Seconds: took them longer than that......

    Mad Max: his name is Max and he's Mad

    Goodfellas: No pizzas were harmed during the making of this film...

    Speed: It's Die Hard on a bus.

    Air Force One: it's Die Hard on a plane

    Face/Off: it's Die Hard with face swapping and John Woo

    Sudden Death: it's Die Hard with Steven Seagal

    Die Hard: it's Die Hard


  • #39
    Seaneh
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,300 ✭✭✭✭Seaneh


    Dean09 wrote: »
    FERRIS BUELLERS DAY OFF = AWESOME!! :D

    Watch Ferris Buellers Day Off again, but apply the story of fight club to it.
    Cameron is Ed Norton, Ferris is Brad Pitt...

    Seriously... think about it...
    Trippy.


  • #40
    Seaneh
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,300 ✭✭✭✭Seaneh


    Tom Cruise movies.

    Top gun: He's a pilot. a really good pilot. he has a crisis of confidence, meets a woman, falls for her, becomes the best pilot in the world.

    Cocktail: He's a bartender. a pretty good bartender. He has a crisis of confidence, meets a girl, falls for her and becomes the best bartender that ever did live.

    Days of thunder: He's a nascar driver, a pretty good nascar drives, he has a crisis of confidence, meet a girl, falls for her and becomes the best nascar driver in the wrold.


    rinse and repeat as required.


  • #41
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    Seaneh wrote: »
    Tom Cruise movies.

    Top gun: He's a pilot. a really good pilot. he has a crisis of confidence, meets a woman, falls for her, becomes the best pilot in the world.

    Cocktail: He's a bartender. a pretty good bartender. He has a crisis of confidence, meets a girl, falls for her and becomes the best bartender that ever did live.

    Days of thunder: He's a nascar driver, a pretty good nascar drives, he has a crisis of confidence, meet a girl, falls for her and becomes the best nascar driver in the wrold.


    rinse and repeat as required.


    You stole that from Rich Hall.

    Skip to 50 secs in.... http://www.guitarsolos.com/videos-rich-hall-tom-cruise-sketch-[8Vmg9e785lo].cfm


  • Advertisement
  • #42
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    Return of the Jedi: He was left on his own =[


  • #43
    Seaneh
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 18,300 ✭✭✭✭Seaneh


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    You stole that from Rich Hall.

    Skip to 50 secs in.... http://www.guitarsolos.com/videos-rich-hall-tom-cruise-sketch-[8Vmg9e785lo].cfm

    yup.


  • #44
    smokedeels
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,883 ✭✭✭smokedeels


    My Dad's synopsis of Avatar: "The one with the 'lad in the wheelchair"


  • #45
    orourkeda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,918 ✭✭✭✭orourkeda


    Basic Instinct = Sharon Stones fanny.


  • #46
    The Maverick
    Registered Users Posts: 417 ✭✭The Maverick


    Downfall: Huge Spoiler!
    The germans lose the war.


  • #47
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    Caddilac Man: Nothing to do with Caddilacs and the bloke doesn't sell a single car...


  • #48
    WindSock
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    My Left Foot: Stewie Griffin explains it best


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANaQY5550YU


  • #49
    bm365
    Registered Users Posts: 252 ✭✭bm365


    Herbie: A Volkswagen with a mind of its own driving around all over the place and going mad - if that's not scary, I don't know what is!


  • #50
    The guy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,373 ✭✭✭The guy


    The passion of the christ:
    Jesus dies


  • #51
    flyton5
    Registered Users Posts: 1,112 ✭✭✭flyton5


    Red Dawn - Best film EVER!!

    Soon to be remade I believe. Watch the original. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Dawn


    Teeth - I'll Never look at a vagina the same.


    Top Gun - Kelly McGillis is hot
    Witness - Kelly McGillis is wrecked...but gets her baps out. Yes yes.


  • Advertisement
Advertisement