NightClubs

mstan

A white man working in the toilets

Edit: Already been mentioned!

mstan

Fionn MacCool wrote: »

I was actually going to post this but in a less racist fashion.

I know they're only trying to make a few bob, and we're really good friends with one of the guys in a club here, but most of them are just plain rude/annoying when they expect you to give them money because they gave you a bit of loo roll. I'd like to go for a piss without having to feel guilty every time I ignore the human bog roll dispenser.

Benny the ponanny man by any chance!?

Gaudizeit

A cattle mart

Sisko

ColeTrain wrote: »

The whole night club culture needs to be overhauled. No gimmicks as such but simple changes.

Turn the lights up a little bit, turn down the shi* music ( or change it up , fk popular music ) and lower the price of drink.

The way it is now, the only way you can converse with a cailín is either by going to a overcrowed smoking area or acting like a knob on the dancefloor, dancing to shi* music and looking like a complete spanner in the process. Also, there is nothing to do but 'laps' around the place, as you can't make conversation. It's a obvious ploy by the nightclubs to keep you at the bar drinking, as you'd rather get drunk as funk than standing around staring into space.

No coincidence either that the best part of ones night is back at a house before the club, having a few drinks with mates and getting the choose good music while engaging in conversation, something that's hard to do on a night out.

The whole thing isn't helped either by the amount of idiots that frequent night clubs but that's a different debate on society as a whole :cool:

This^

I never feel motivated to go 'clubbing' and what pisses me off is the presumed stigma attached "If you don't go clubbing you have no life" etc.

WTF like. I don't like dancing, I don't like **** music, I'm not the kinda guy that enjoys getting shit faced then sexually harass random women , I don't wanna have to drop pills to enjoy myself and I fucking want to be able to actually have an conversation with my mates if I have to spend so much money to get drunk.

Bollocks, I mean eye candy is great and all but thats the only postive with so many other negitives , house sessions are just far more enjoyable.

Can't understand people who say that's 'weird'

mstan wrote: »

A white man working in the toilets

WTF does it matter what colour skin he has? GTFO of here with that bollocks.

klose

Frikkin' lazer beams*






*attached sharks optional.

Rabies

johndaman66 wrote: »

Rabies I feel that them comments are actually very unfair and factually incorrect. There is no doubt in my mind that a fair share of those who frequent the niteclubs who belt out the pop music crap are also social drug users and not necessairly are on higher incomes even generally.



I actually take issue with them comments too. I'm 29 (probably a bit old for the whole niteclub thing really) and can well afford a drink and the odd special here and there. Thats not to say I like the idea of paying €5.30 for a bloody bottle of Smirnoff Ice either though in a niteclub (as I did recently when getting a round in).

I work in the industry and know how the market works. Have managed clubs (house, electro,DnB, Dubstep, Fidget, trance), disco bars (commercial house, top 40 and commercial electro) and also have managed bars and restaurants(retro, rock, pop, alternative). I have covered the spectrum of ages, know crowd, spending habit etc.
My earlier statement isn't covering everyone, but does cover most. Next time you're out in a proper club, take a good sober look around and come back to me.

Lukker- wrote: »

I also prefer the Spanish system where clubs don't open until 2 and don't close until about 7, this gets more people leaving at different times and stops the "Abra Kedabra/Supermacs" rush at 2:30, but it probably wouldn't suit Irish culture. (can't imagine what state people would be going into a club at 2)

Ireland needs later closing or staged times. it reduces queues for taxis, less street fights and slows the rate of drinking. But the side effect is you think about drinking longer.

flas

blow69 wrote: »

The music needs to be turned down and/or changed. I mean, who actually enjoys music at that level on a night out? Surely most DJs out there are tired of playing the same crap, and I bet that's not the kind of music they want to play.

The smoking area should be a third the size of the club with a decent-sized bar inside and with sufficient temperature and ventilation. It's sad to say, but this is where the best times can be had. You can actually hear what people are saying and everybody is having a good time.

A different kind of layout or blueprint of the floor plan with cool (quirky even, but not gimmicky) features.

Drinks promotions every night e.g €3 vodkas. And they should get those showerhead type soft drinks dispensers. Stop charging €2+ extra for the 200ml bottle you throw at me and expect me to mix the drink myself. It's actually unbelievable how common this is in Irish clubs. In other countries they mix the drink for you and put in a little straw and maybe even a piece of fruit. i know, crazy right?


Is that too hard to ask for? I think not.

I would love to open my own club..

in other countries the customer doesnt mind about waiting the extra couple seconds for barmen to do this! in ireland, the customers start shouting that the barman is taking too long and just wants to get served as quick as possible, imagine if everyone was mixing everyone in a nightclubs drinks, the customers would be going ape **** where as in countries they would not be and would relax when they are out.

and the piece of fruit, well every barman worth his salt will put a slice of lemon into a vodka and tonic or gin and tonic because any barman worth his salt would ask the customer on ordering these drinks if they want one in it, its a natural addative to these drinks.

danh789

timmywex wrote: »

What would be cool things to have in a nightclub....apart from hot women and all that...

A couple of Blackjack, Roulette etc. tables

johndaman66

Rabies wrote: »

My earlier statement isn't covering everyone, but does cover most. Next time you're out in a proper club, take a good sober look around and come back to me.

OK Rabies I'm not sure if we would agree on what a proper club is in the first instance but also not sure if there is a common definition either. I think we would probably agree that there aren't too many of them if any in Republic of Ireland. I seldom be abroad so don't think I'll be in a proper niteclub any time soon. Not exactly sure what I'm meant to be looking out for either mind you. Assuming you are suggesting that a club playing a particular gerne of music attracts a particular type of clientelle perhaps maybe. But having said that though I don't think you are any more likely to get more social drug users in a niteclub playing proper trance and house music than one playing commercial tripe, less if any maybe. Ireland is probably not a good country to draw comparisons from as practically all clubs seem to cater for the masses and not a particular group or category. Suppose many of the smaller towns have only one real niteclub too or at least only one obvious choice where everybody flocks to after the pubs close so guess this is bound to be the case.

Lukker I think you made some very valid points in your post.

scorpioishere

orourkeda wrote: »

No blacks in the jacks

May be you should take up the job instead, i bet you'll do better.:D

Piste

timmywex wrote: »

A bad time to ask this but being it a saturday night but...


What would be cool things to have in a nightclub....apart from hot women and all that...

I mean like beer bong's, super soakers with vodka/bouncy castles or the likes....anyone any crazy suggestions on what your local club should have?

The crazier they are probably means the better they are :cool:

Trying to see what would make a crazy night here, or just how wierd people are

Octopussy in the Academy (Dublin) has a bouncy castle, ballpit, jcuzzi, wedding chapel with Elvis, limbo and an 18ft Pool

Deleted User wrote: »

Less people or quieter music.

That's just a pub really.

starbelgrade

greetings wrote: »

Signs that are strictly enforced.
'No fat chicks'

Signs that are strictly enforced.
'No fat heads'

df1985

a good lighting and sound system.

not going from R&B to dance to journey/kings of leon in 10 minutes.

Ireland will never have proper nightclubs with our opening hours, what id give for Pacha to set up a club here!

Piste

Piste wrote: »

That's just a pub really.

Yeah, can we just go there instead?

billox

flas wrote: »

in other countries the customer doesnt mind about waiting the extra couple seconds for barmen to do this! in ireland, the customers start shouting that the barman is taking too long and just wants to get served as quick as possible, imagine if everyone was mixing everyone in a nightclubs drinks, the customers would be going ape **** where as in countries they would not be and would relax when they are out.

and the piece of fruit, well every barman worth his salt will put a slice of lemon into a vodka and tonic or gin and tonic because any barman worth his salt would ask the customer on ordering these drinks if they want one in it, its a natural addative to these drinks.

also in ireland alot of people will think you've watered down their drinks if you mix it for them...and the fruit thing would piss me off if i got a lump of fruit with every drink....i think it could even be illegal in ireland for a barman to mix someones drink i could be very wrong though

flas

billox wrote: »

also in ireland alot of people will think you've watered down their drinks if you mix it for them...and the fruit thing would piss me off if i got a lump of fruit with every drink....i think it could even be illegal in ireland for a barman to mix someones drink i could be very wrong though

if someone asks you to do it fair enough, but as said above the majority of customers would be like was there a full measure in that glass, or you put too much in, i want another one, things like this, most people are dicks when they are drunk and ordering at a bar!

billox

flas wrote: »

if someone asks you to do it fair enough, but as said above the majority of customers would be like was there a full measure in that glass, or you put too much in, i want another one, things like this, most people are dicks when they are drunk and ordering at a bar!

at least some people realise it...barwork is probably one of the most thankless job you can work in..people think its just pouring drinks for people they don't know how tough it can be or even how dangerous it can be

orourkeda

A liberal sprinkling of these:

http://www.examiner.com/images/blog/EXID28142/images/Lady_Gaga_strap_on_dildo_Q_Magazine.jpg

orourkeda

scorpioishere wrote: »

May be you should take up the job instead, i bet you'll do better.:D

Do you reckon? Would you like to be my assistant? You sound like the type who thinks you're above that sort of thing.

billox

Mr.S wrote: »

- Longer opening hours. Its pathetic that the plug is pulled @ 2:30am/3AM here. Sure most people are only making it into the clubs around Midnight. Would love to see clubs being open till 4AM.

- Drink prices. Order anything thats not on promo and you'll pay through the teeth for it. IMO all drinks (pints, shots, vodka + mix) should be under a 5er.

Thats about it really, music genre varies from club to club, as despite what people say, Dublin (at least anyway) has a club for pretty much every type, you just got to know where to go.

only way for pubs/clubs to drop prices is for the government to drop the amount of tax they charge them

ballsymchugh

Mr.S wrote: »

Midweek, a club in Dublin sells pints of beer for €3. At the weekend, they sell the same for €5.50.

The know that students wouldn't come if its expensive, but the weekend crowd (IE working people with €€€€) will

So drinks can be cheap, just they are greedy fkers out there!

also, at weekends after 11pm, the prices go up again. there's no need for that messing at all.

OutlawPete

eeloe wrote: »

Staggered closing times

Hey!!

I always stagger at closing time :mad:

Conor_M1990

danh789 wrote: »

A couple of Blackjack, Roulette etc. tables

thats a casino not a nightclub

Rabies

df1985 wrote: »

Ireland will never have proper nightclubs with our opening hours, what id give for Pacha to set up a club here!

I was supposed to have them over for a big club night about two months ago.
The guy handles the Australasia rights to the brand sold it to us with out Pacha consent... he got in **** from them and he had to pull it

scorpioishere

orourkeda wrote: »

Do you reckon? Would you like to be my assistant? You sound like the type who thinks you're above that sort of thing.

The job will suit you the best. I leave it to you and i don't think they need assistant as they work on their own. Obviously the lazy one will need assistant.

Charlie Haughy

Well, in the south east anyway, id love for the "nightclubs" here (which most arent even the slightest like one) to play actually good dance music (electro house, techno etc.) not lady gaga and beyonce all night. Also some good promotions on drinks, and a good set of varying lights, not a dance floor with a spotlight on it that never changes where everyone can see you dancing. But this will never happen because of many reasons we all know of....

shrewd

starbelgrade wrote: »

Tea, scones & some good books.

haha.., LMAO. are u for real?

OutlawPete

shrewd wrote: »

haha.., LMAO. are u for real?

Yes, Star is in fact .. Withnail!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6m6LhZJdCQY

Snowie

timmywex wrote: »

A bad time to ask this but being it a saturday night but...


What would be cool things to have in a nightclub....apart from hot women and all that...

I mean like beer bong's, super soakers with vodka/bouncy castles or the likes....anyone any crazy suggestions on what your local club should have?

The crazier they are probably means the better they are :cool:

Trying to see what would make a crazy night here, or just how wierd people are

its quite easy me working behinde the bar....:)

saywhatyousee

billox wrote: »

only way for pubs/clubs to drop prices is for the government to drop the amount of tax they charge them

i can get a double vodka and red bull in sligo for 5.50 in a night club
double morgan spice and coke is 6 euro in the pub i go to
in dublin what would they cost probaly about 14euro
there is plenty of room for publicans to drop their prices

seanbmc

timmywex wrote: »

A bad time to ask this but being it a saturday night but...


What would be cool things to have in a nightclub....apart from hot women and all that...

I mean like beer bong's, super soakers with vodka/bouncy castles or the likes....anyone any crazy suggestions on what your local club should have?

The crazier they are probably means the better they are :cool:

Trying to see what would make a crazy night here, or just how wierd people are

I have been to a place that has these things bar the beer bongs.

starbelgrade

seanbmc wrote: »

I have been to a place that has these things bar the beer bongs.

The "bongs" are called "yards", as in a "yard of ale" because they are a yard long & traditionally filled with ale.

raven136

The crowd who go to niteclubs surely are under 30's.They go to get hammered,eye up half naked chicks,drop pills,listen to very loud music they already own and pay a fortune for drink.To be honest every now and then with a good group a night like this can be great fun.

--Kaiser--

They do nightclubs much better abroad I find.

fakearms123

A few adjustments would be great for nightclubs:

- ecstasy dispenser by the bar
- black man in the jacks gave oral sex instead of hand towels
- liposuction clinic for all the fat chicks who come into the club
- and cigars for all the boys!! Yaaahhooooooo!!

Sanjuro

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vlOhj4eTpA