non muslim guy and muslim girl

petemg

hey all

right basically im a Christian guy (not strict) and i like a Muslim girl (fairly strict) and i respect her religion and understand how it affects things, i havent bought the subject with her as i dont want her to feel awkward around me so not sure how she feels, but i do know she is always happy around me and relaxed. What should i do? Should i tell her just to be honest with her?

Thanks guys any advice appreciated

Pete

mmalaka

What are you looking for in this relation?

As you said in your post her religion will affects things......The Muslim girl is not allowed to marry a non Muslim man....

petemg

well if im honest mmalaka i would like the chance to be in a relationship with her (if she wanted the same)

But i also respect that our religions (as i wont just blame Islam) make it tough the main thing i would like to know is would it be right to tell her my feelings towards her first?

mmalaka

If she is fairly strict as you said...she will not accept to be in a relationship with you and so this will make her feel awkward around you

petemg

and what if i looked at converting, i was close a few years ago after taking a look at my friends Quran.

mmalaka

Converting will make things much easier for her......good luck

Bodhisopha

I sense a sitcom!

Kurd your enthusiasm?

petemg

Thanks mmalaka

Bodhisopha i sense a t**t

Fanny Cradock

It seems like folly to consider converting because you want to smooth the waters for a potential relationship. Conversion should be on the basis of a conviction you have about the teachings of Islam, nothing else.

irishconvert

Fanny Cradock wrote: »

It seems like folly to consider converting because you want to smooth the waters for a potential relationship. Conversion should be on the basis of a conviction you have about the teachings of Islam, nothing else.

I agree but as the OP said he was close to converting before I would suggest he looks into it. I originally wanted to convert so I could marry my now wife. However when I delved into Islam I discovered it really made sense to me so I converted for real.

Fanny Cradock

Well that is fair enough. But I can't help but suspect that this is a case of shifting the furniture.

stevoslice

wasn't there some girl in iraq stoned to death for converting to islam so she could marry her boyfriend.

wonder if that would have happened if the sexes were reversed.

ahh here it is
Du'a Khalil Aswad

Bottle_of_Smoke

thebhoy wrote: »

wasn't there some girl in iraq stoned to death for converting to islam so she could marry her boyfriend.

wonder if that would have happened if the sexes were reversed.

ahh here it is
Du'a Khalil Aswad

That's horrific, really shows you humans aren't all that different to other animals.

irishconvert

Please stay on topic guys

petemg

Well guys it went from bad to worse,

she told me she isnt muslim (she said that she said muslim as its easier to explain) and actually she is yasidi and obviously this makes things difficult

biko

Too bad mate, well plenty more fish in the sea

ChocolateSauce

petemg wrote: »

Well guys it went from bad to worse,

she told me she isnt muslim (she said that she said muslim as its easier to explain) and actually she is yasidi and obviously this makes things difficult

That does make thinks touph....I read up on that religion...you know they revere the angel Tawûsê Melek, whom the Muslims, and by extension possibly the Christians, believe to be Satan. According the wikipedia article anyway.

But to get on topic, I think it is disrespectful to your own religion and to hers to consider converting for the sake of a relationship. It shows you value neither.

Terri26

Sorry can I please ask for clarifaction of the following. I was under teh impression that a Muslin man could marry a Jew Or Christian (as they were people of the book) but not atheists polytheistic religions etc. Obviously it would be preferable if they married another Muslim but Jewish nd Christian marriage is accepted. is this true?
also if Muslim men are allowed to do this are Muslim women not allowed to do it hence why Irish convert felt he had to convert? I am asking a question here not trying to make an assumption? thanks am trying to get a better understanding of Islam in general

macam girl

TBH, just because some body follows a religion does not mean that anyone interested in them, has to convert ? I do not have a religion and my husband is muslim! I also know plenty of muslim women/men who date/marry non-muslims, catholic etc and vice versa. It really depends on how orthodox/ unorthodox regarding their religion the person is.

hivizman

This is what Sheikh Yusuf al-Qaradawi writes in his book The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam (New Delhi: KitabBhavan, 2006, p. 185):

While a Muslim man is permitted to marry a Christian or Jewish woman, a Muslim woman is not allowed to marry a Christian or Jewish man. There are many sound reasons for this difference. First, the man is the head of the household, the one who maintains the family, and he is responsible for his wife. And while Islam guarantees freedom of belief and practice to the Christian or the Jewish wife of a Muslim, safeguarding her rights according to her own faith, other religions, such as Judaism and Christianity, do not guarantee the wife of a different faith freedom of belief and practice, nor do they safeguard her rights. Since this is the case, how can Islam take chances on the future of its daughters by giving them into the hands of people who neither honour their religion nor are concerned to protect their rights? A Christian or Jewish wife of a Muslim lives under the protection of a man who respects the basic tenets of her faith, her scripture, and her prophets, while in contrast to this the Jew or Christian recognises neither the divine origin of Islam, its Book, or its Prophet. How then could a Muslim woman live with such a man, while her religion requires of her the observance of certain worships, duties, and obligations, as well as certain prohibitions. It would be impossible for the Muslim woman to retain her respect for her beliefs as well as to practice her religion properly if she were opposed in this regard by the master of the house at every step.

This passage has a clear, taken for granted, view of marriage as placing women under the protection and control of men. As the husband is viewed as "ruling" the household, the husband's religion is deemed to dominate (a bit like the old political concept of cuius regio, eius religio [whoever rules is the one who decides on the religion]). A Muslim male can, it is asserted, tolerate a non-Muslim wife from among the "People of the Book" (but not from among the polytheists or unbelievers), but a non-Muslim male, it is assumed, cannot be trusted to accommodate the faith of a Muslim wife.

oceanclub

hivizman wrote: »

the husband's religion is deemed to dominate

I must tell my wife this.

P.

irishconvert

oceanclub wrote: »

I must tell my wife this.

P.

Everyone knows the wife rules the roost!

oceanclub

irishconvert wrote: »

Everyone knows the wife rules the roost!

I go to Mass at least three times a year, and yet so far she hasn't read a single Dawkins book for me...

P.