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told my dad....

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  • 21-10-2010 1:02am
    #1
    orlaithf700
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭


    well sunday night i got drunk and text my dad that iv a girlfriend, were going out 4 months like but was just always something i didnt feel comfortable telling my dad
    but i just said im sorry if this upsets you hopefully it wont but me and ... are going out and he basically said i had a feeling you were. sure if your happy thats all that matters
    but ever since sunday hes been a right snappy prick like, snide comments constant criticism etc
    makes me think maybe i shouldnt have told him at all....


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    #2
    DeVore
    Business & Finance Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 32,387 Mod ✭✭✭✭DeVore


    Maybe he is hurt you did it by text.... no criticism of you, just... he might be hurt and processing a lot right now. Give him time and maybe talk to him.

    DeV.


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    #3
    ninty9er
    Registered Users Posts: 9,366 ✭✭✭ninty9er


    Is it possible that it's just your dad being himself, but now that you've told him you're expecting things to be different and noticing stuff?

    If not, just sit down somewhere (where you have an easy quick escape route) with him and ask if it's an issue for him. If you werre expecting a negative response at least one way or another you'll know where you stand, but he is still talking to you which is probably something you were worried about beforehand, so it's all good compared to your expectations.


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    #4
    Asphyxia
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,740 ✭✭✭Asphyxia


    I admire your courage some people can never tell there parents about their sexuality. If you think he is being snappy and rude towards you the best thing would be to sit down together and talk it out before it turns uglier.


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    #5
    orlaithf700
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭orlaithf700


    if he was being himself he'd be all happy etc but hes not its like he frowns upon it i guess. just glad i dont live with him anymore ha


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    #6
    Chuchoter
    Registered Users Posts: 4,305 ✭✭✭Chuchoter


    I'd be a snappy prick too if my daughter came out to me by text.


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    #7
    jimmypitt
    Closed Accounts Posts: 243 ✭✭jimmypitt


    crayolastereo wrote: »
    I'd be a snappy prick too if my daughter came out to me by text.

    +1. Shows a complete lack of respect.

    My Dad would be super pi*sed if i ever dared tell him any major piece of news via a text message. For God's sake what kind of a reaction would you expect.


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    #8
    CluelessGirl
    Registered Users Posts: 181 ✭✭CluelessGirl


    I think you may be a little unfair on your Dad.

    You have had time to come to terms and deal with your sexuality.

    It will take him time also........it does not mean he doesn't love you or accept you.

    Parents just need time to understand it and accept it and yes they will be disappointed at first.

    Its not as simple as Hey Dad I'm gay and he is going to go great and that is that.

    All the dreams and expectations they may have had for you will change and that takes time to get your head around.

    My Mum and Dad are great and accepted me but that doesn't mean they don't feel and get upset about different things now and then......communication is key!

    Thats my take on it.

    They are only human....be patient.


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    #9
    Annasopra
    Registered Users Posts: 41,062 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    talk to your dad, If he is struggling with coming to terms with it refer him to www.lovingouroutkids.org

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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    #10
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    He's probably upset with the way you told him.
    Speaking as a parent, I'd be wondering what my daughter is playing at by texting me about something so important.
    That's a face to face conversation, not a sms one. You basically cut off any kind of discussion on it by letting him know in such a way.
    Sit down with your Da and apologise for dropping this information via sms, explain you were too afraid to do it in person. It will help clear the air.


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