Clothing grants when pregnant - Mod note post 40

kirstyor123

Nozebleed wrote: »

OP I hope you get the grant. did you say you were an unemployed single mother? you should get on the housing list too..

Cheers i hope i do too to ive to go down to my swo tomorrow to see if i can get it.. went the charity shop today and bought a few things out of the little bit of money i had left because after i pay my rent,bills and shoppping theres very little left...im unemployed and pregnant not single mother just yet and yes i have to get my butt over to get on housing list too

kirstyor123

CK2010 wrote: »

wow nice one, you give out about people making assumptions about you and then you lay down this bad boy.

i was pregnant at 16, i had no idea of these grants at the time, my maternity clothes consisted of three t-shirts in a size ten as opposed to my usual 8, a pair of maternity jeans and my school uniform because i stayed in school so i wouldnt be a "teenage pregnant money grabber who intends to stay on sw".

i used my birthday and x-mas money of that year to buy a buggy and i got a second hand cot off a family member. just because i was a teenager does not mean i was a money grabber.

while recieving SW to get me through college, i worked every saturday (while getting my degree btw) to ensure that i could pay for my daughters medical bills, which included many overnight hospital stays, prescriptions, gp visits, all the rest that comes hand in hand with having a child with an undiagnosable condition that they didnt take seriously at first because her parents were young,
i did not avail of the medical card purely because i was entitled.

i applied only for assistance that was needed, the bare minimum, to get me through college so i could actually provide for her myself.

im not attacking you and im not saying that you shouldnt get the grant, im just explaining that not all teenage parents are money grabbers. im also suggesting you dont make generalisations that you condemned others on this thread for making about you.

Oh my god of course not thats not what i meant.. the post to which i was replying to said that i was so i was putting them straight saying i wasnt.. i would never look down my nose to ANYBODY or any teenager on social welfare because i have been on sw since i was 18 on and off and i have good friends of mine and family that had babies pretty young and had to get by on sw....of course teenage parents are not just money grabbers.. i dont think any teenager would just get pregnant for the money you recieve on sw as being a mum is the hardest thing in the world especially for young girls..

wolfpawnat

kirstyor123 wrote: »

Oh my god of course not thats not what i meant.. the post to which i was replying to said that i was so i was putting them straight saying i wasnt.. i would never look down my nose to ANYBODY or any teenager on social welfare because i have been on sw since i was 18 on and off and i have good friends of mine and family that had babies pretty young and had to get by on sw....of course teenage parents are not just money grabbers.. i dont think any teenager would just get pregnant for the money you recieve on sw as being a mum is the hardest thing in the world especially for young girls..

I do, and she is the type of girl that is giving all younger mothers a bad name!

Nice girls that accidently get pregnant and just accept the cards they are dealt and get on with it. They are tarred in with this girl. It is wrong!

kirstyor123

sud1 wrote: »

I had a baby at 20 yrs of age..now 33..I had very little money but i did not go to a sw officer for money for clothes..i had 2 pants 1 black 1 brown both elasticated waist and about 4 jumpers these did me for the entire pregnancy..I cant understand how you would need a grant to buy clothes for this short period of time..go to dunnes, pennies or a thrift shop...there are people who are in much worse situations than you and need the money for keeping a house over their families head..just because your "entitled" does not mean you have to or should take it...

Well why didnt you get the grant if you had very little money ?? Are you too proud or you think other people need it more because thats rubbish! the people who need it are getting it and you should have to.. and you cant understand why i would need money for clothes when dunnes and penneys are there well ill tell you why..I do not live with my mother i am living in an apartment renting a room and my rent bills and shopping leaves me with near enough to NOTHING!! so yes even penneys is looking expensive at the minute.

CK2010

kirstyor123 wrote: »

Oh my god of course not thats not what i meant.. the post to which i was replying to said that i was so i was putting them straight saying i wasnt.. i would never look down my nose to ANYBODY or any teenager on social welfare because i have been on sw since i was 18 on and off and i have good friends of mine and family that had babies pretty young and had to get by on sw....of course teenage parents are not just money grabbers.. i dont think any teenager would just get pregnant for the money you recieve on sw as being a mum is the hardest thing in the world especially for young girls..

the post you were replying to referred to single mothers not teenage mothers, you said teenage mother. maybe you just assumed teenage automatically equates to single mother i dunno. from what i gather you were the first to use teenage mother in that context though, and it comes accross like you were the one stereotyping.

Fittle

Nowhere did I say you were a teenager, it was you who jumped on the bandwagon and mentioned another 'stereotype' of women who are parenting alone.

What I said is I know women like you who have an 'attitude' about sw. The attitude that they are 'entitled' to these grants, like it's some god-given right.

Look at it this way. There was another woman in a similar position to you on another website recently. She also had no support around her (I had none either btw, i was just lucky that two people bought me the big stuff - but I was 100% parenting alone, with no boyfriend/family around me, so I DO know what you're talking about here).

But her post was asking how she would cope when the baby came along - emotionally and financially. She was wondering if she could do it on her own and how she'd ever be able to afford childcare if she ever got back to work/how other women cope with the lack of sleep while parenting alone/how could she encourage the father to be involved, when he was showing little, or no interest whilst she was still pregnant.

She didn't say

'Now at six months all that stuff i bought is getting too small and if i am entitled to it then damn sure im going to get it!!'

And when she was given advice and support about her financial 'entitlements' she was very, very thankful that she would receive that support. It was her attitude to her situation that encouraged others to reply, and offer her support.

kirstyor123

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I do, and she is the type of girl that is giving all younger mothers a bad name!

Nice girls that accidently get pregnant and just accept the cards they are dealt and get on with it. They are tarred in with this girl. It is wrong!

Who exactly is that post aimed at ??

CK2010

I will however play devils advocate here and say that you do need to know your entitlements are before you go to your local SWO or CWO, generally they dont tell you what you're entitlements are, you've to tell them what you want first after being advised by an external source (eg. citizens info-which ive only ever had bad experiences with as they just read the website page to me and also got it wrong in the process! :rolleyes: -lucky im now qualified in social policy! lol!)
they generally do not volunteer the information no matter how hard done by you are.

kirstyor123

Fittle wrote: »

Nowhere did I say you were a teenager, it was you who jumped on the bandwagon and mentioned another 'stereotype' of women who are parenting alone.

What I said is I know women like you who have an 'attitude' about sw. The attitude that they are 'entitled' to these grants, like it's some god-given right.

Look at it this way. There was another woman in a similar position to you on another website recently. She also had no support around her (I had none either btw, i was just lucky that two people bought me the big stuff - but I was 100% parenting alone, with no boyfriend/family around me, so I DO know what you're talking about here).

But her post was asking how she would cope when the baby came along - emotionally and financially. She was wondering if she could do it on her own and how she'd ever be able to afford childcare if she ever got back to work/how other women cope with the lack of sleep while parenting alone/how could she encourage the father to be involved, when he was showing little, or no interest whilst she was still pregnant.

She didn't say

'Now at six months all that stuff i bought is getting too small and if i am entitled to it then damn sure im going to get it!!'

And when she was given advice and support about her financial 'entitlements' she was very, very thankful that she would receive that support. It was her attitude to her situation that encouraged others to reply, and offer her support.

Oh for gods sake why does everyone have a problem with the word entiltled ?? Women on sw are entiteld ( ill say it again ) to these grants simple reason being when on sw even penneys and dunnes start to look expensive so yes the word is entitled to.. It aint no god given right but the money is there to help you out simple as.

I have read posts from women who never went to there sw office for these grants and why not ? So they can get on some high-horse come on here and say that they done it all themselves and wouldnt go near there swo for anything well thats ridiculous the help is there for women on sw so go get it i say!!

CK2010

i think the issue is that people would like to see mothers doing as much as they can if possible before availing of their entitlements. not just applying for everything they can regardless of whether they genuinely need it.

just because a person is entitled it does not mean she should just take it. if you can get by without then do. its what people who arent eligible for SW do every day so people who are entitled to it should have the respect to do as much as they can themselves and then failing that of course apply for what you're entitled to.

thats my opinion anyway.

and also i do think there is something to be proud of if you do try providing for your own child rather than using social welfare, i dont think its a moral highground issue at all. thats not to say theres shame in not doing so- i just think every mother would prefer to provide as best she can herself for her child.

kirstyor123

CK2010 wrote: »

the post you were replying to referred to single mothers not teenage mothers, you said teenage mother. maybe you just assumed teenage automatically equates to single mother i dunno. from what i gather you were the first to use teenage mother in that context though, and it comes accross like you were the one stereotyping.

Well then i do apologise if by me saying teenage meant you any offence to you.. Its all the same to me teenage/single/married parents whatever. we are all doing the same job regardless of age or occupation

Fittle

kirstyor123 wrote: »

Oh for gods sake why does everyone have a problem with the word entiltled ?? Women on sw are entiteld ( ill say it again ) to these grants simple reason being when on sw even penneys and dunnes start to look expensive so yes the word is entitled to.. It aint no god given right but the money is there to help you out simple as.

I have read posts from women who never went to there sw office for these grants and why not ? So they can get on some high-horse come on here and say that they done it all themselves and wouldnt go near there swo for anything well thats ridiculous the help is there for women on sw so go get it i say!!

I don't think there is anyone on their high-horse here. We are ALL struggling at this moment in time. But few, if any of us can jump on a website and ask where we can get an extra 150euro for clothes. Today, I have exactly 12euro on me. I have no savings and am not paid until next week. I will be borrowing to get me through to next week, and if someone told me I could get 150euro for doing nothing, yes, I'd be there.

But I certainly would not be jumping down everyones throat who dared to question me - nor would I be shouting about my 'entitlement' to it - I'd be over the moon and would get the 150 as graciously as is humanly possible. It's all about attitude.

kirstyor123

CK2010 wrote: »

and also i do think there is something to be proud of if you do try providing for your own child rather than using social welfare, i dont think its a moral highground issue at all. thats not to say theres shame in not doing so- i just think every mother would prefer to provide as best she can herself for her child.

well i think it is a moral highground issue actually, being pregnant and on sw is hard enough than not taking some grants off sw beacuse YOU would rather carry the burden of where the cot and buggy is coming from and so forth..

wolfpawnat

Fittle wrote: »

I don't think there is anyone on their high-horse here. We are ALL struggling at this moment in time. But few, if any of us can jump on a website and ask where we can get an extra 150euro for clothes. Today, I have exactly 12euro on me. I have no savings and am not paid until next week. I will be borrowing to get me through to next week, and if someone told me I could get 150euro for doing nothing, yes, I'd be there.

But I certainly would not be jumping down everyones throat who dared to question me - nor would I be shouting about my 'entitlement' to it - I'd be over the moon and would get the 150 as graciously as is humanly possible. It's all about attitude.

I hate this, having to ring a family member and explain that I need €20 because my ESB took all I had saved in the bank. It is degrading and embarrassing. I know my family would do it for me, but I just wish I didn't have to

CK2010

well actually YOU are the one who is raising this child, YOU are its mother so yes, YOU should carry the burden. why should the state???

if you go to school, YOU do the work.
if you want a nice bar of chocolate YOU pay for it.
if you have a baby YOU pay for it.

if you genuinely cant then by all means go to your SWO but if you can then YOU pay for it!!!

thats not the moral high ground thats the joys of being a mother!

wolfpawnat

CK2010 wrote: »

well actually YOU are the one who is raising this child, YOU are its mother so yes, YOU should carry the burden. why should the state???

if you go to school, YOU do the work.
if you want a nice bar of chocolate YOU pay for it.
if you have a baby YOU pay for it.

if you genuinely cant then by all means go to your SWO but if you can then YOU pay for it!!!

thats not the moral high ground thats the joys of being a mother!

Well that is it, the first thing you have to remember when you are pregnant. You come second for the next 22 years!

If you need a hair cut, it may not happen. Nappies come first. I just got all my hair cut off, saves a fortune in looking after it and means I spend less on shampoo.

Clothes - if they fit and are not full of holes, they do not need replacing. I am wearing jeans I have had since I was 16, tops since I was 17 and I have not bought new underwear in a year!

Your child comes first. You do not register anymore. It is something women in financial difficulty are not listening to! They seem to think they are still priority. I know a girl on SW, the child is as good as abandoned all day in its room, while she watches the Xfactor and goes online to Littlewoods Ireland for her clothes and gets hair extentions put in, while her child has a inadequate diet as he is not even getting a multivitamin.

It is a selfish world we live in:(

PS, not putting you in as one of these girls OP

kirstyor123

Fittle wrote: »

But I certainly would not be jumping down everyones throat who dared to question me - nor would I be shouting about my 'entitlement' to it - I'd be over the moon and would get the 150 as graciously as is humanly possible. It's all about attitude.

I havent being jumping down peoples throats, defo not for questioning me anyways, i have answered questions like why cant you just go to penneys and charity shop and so forth and explained my situation.. Have you actually looked at some of the posts that was written after i asked for some information on these grants ? Lets just say some people make you out to be the worst person or mother in the world, I wouldnt even say i got a proper answer to my question just vile comments about getting grants off sw so yes maybe screaming' entiltled' wasnt such a good idea but believe me i am one of the people that actually do need the help

CK2010

kirstyor123 wrote: »

I havent being jumping down peoples throats, defo not for questioning me anyways, i have answered questions like why cant you just go to penneys and charity shop and so forth and explained my situation.. Have you actually looked at some of the posts that was written after i asked for some information on these grants ? Lets just say some people make you out to be the worst person or mother in the world, I wouldnt even say i got a proper answer to my question just vile comments about getting grants off sw so yes maybe screaming' entiltled' wasnt such a good idea but believe me i am one of the people that actually do need the help

but kirsty you were looking for info on a grant you already received. you wanted another installment. i get that you're entitled but tbh i dont blame people for being a little taken back at someone looking for more of something they were blessed to get in the first place.

i think if you were looking for info on just how to apply for that grant for the first time people would have been more than happy to help without a second glance.

kirstyor123

CK2010 wrote: »

well actually YOU are the one who is raising this child, YOU are its mother so yes, YOU should carry the burden. why should the state???

if you go to school, YOU do the work.
if you want a nice bar of chocolate YOU pay for it.
if you have a baby YOU pay for it.

if you genuinely cant then by all means go to your SWO but if you can then YOU pay for it!!!

thats not the moral high ground thats the joys of being a mother!

Oh 'I' will be paying for my baby myself after it is born because i can get a job and will find no better high than going out working to provide for my baby..

Its before its born that i cannot manage..
because i cant get a job...

You think i would rather sit in swo for 1 hr and have to ask a stranger for some money for clothes and baby essentials no of course i wouldnt!!
I d find no better high than going out to work for my baby everyday knowing that everything he/she owns comes from mummy wages packet and not sw.

CK2010

so then you should be able to see that its not a moral high ground.. going round in circles here!

angelfire9

wolfpawnat wrote: »

Well that is it, the first thing you have to remember when you are pregnant. You come second for the next 22 years!

If you need a hair cut, it may not happen. Nappies come first. I just got all my hair cut off, saves a fortune in looking after it and means I spend less on shampoo.

Clothes - if they fit and are not full of holes, they do not need replacing. I am wearing jeans I have had since I was 16, tops since I was 17 and I have not bought new underwear in a year!

Your child comes first. You do not register anymore. It is something women in financial difficulty are not listening to! They seem to think they are still priority. I know a girl on SW, the child is as good as abandoned all day in its room, while she watches the Xfactor and goes online to Littlewoods Ireland for her clothes and gets hair extentions put in, while her child has a inadequate diet as he is not even getting a multivitamin.

It is a selfish world we live in:(

PS, not putting you in as one of these girls OP

Mmmm.... a haircut... chance would be a fine thing my hair is almost at the stage where i can sit on it now but there is no way I can afford the 20-30 quid to get it cut, 30 quid = bread, milk and meat for the weekend
Maybe i should get my mother to cut my hair like she used to when i was around 10

Fittle

I agree wholeheartedly with CK - you received this grant already but you choose to spend it on clothes that wouldn't fit you during your pregnancy. That was your choice.
And then you're looking for another grant. The country is currently in dire straits - the whole country - not just you and few, if any of us, can get 150euro anywhere, for doing nothing!! None of us!!
So we're all a bit p!ssed off to put it mildly. And then we hear that pregnant women on sw are entitled to two grants to buy clothes....I'm not sure what you expect to hear when I literally have 12euro to feed myself and my child on for the next 9 days. Have you watched the news recently - can you see what's happening all around you?
Like I said, it's your attitude that is annoying - and I don't think anyone posted a 'vile' comment - most, if not all who were in anyway negative are just mightly p!ssed off with their own current financial woes, and then read here that pregnant women on sw can get money for clothes. I'm not sure what reaction you expected to be honest.

CK2010

angelfire9 wrote: »

Mmmm.... a haircut... chance would be a fine thing my hair is almost at the stage where i can sit on it now but there is no way I can afford the 20-30 quid to get it cut, 30 quid = bread, milk and meat for the weekend
Maybe i should get my mother to cut my hair like she used to when i was around 10

haha thats what ive done on many occassions! sitting there cringing and hoping for the best!

kirstyor123

CK2010 wrote: »

but kirsty you were looking for info on a grant you already received. you wanted another installment. i get that you're entitled but tbh i dont blame people for being a little taken back at someone looking for more of something they were blessed to get in the first place.

i think if you were looking for info on just how to apply for that grant for the first time people would have been more than happy to help without a second glance.

I know i know i explained already how with the first installment i messed up, i didnt get some proper maternity wear that would do me for whole pregnancy i know i should have cause now i really am in need of some stuff bump just popped out out of nowhere:o

Had to make a trip to charity shop today to see if i could find anything:o

Nozebleed

Fittle wrote: »

I agree wholeheartedly with CK - you received this grant already but you choose to spend it on clothes that wouldn't fit you during your pregnancy. That was your choice.
And then you're looking for another grant. The country is currently in dire straits - the whole country - not just you and few, if any of us, can get 150euro anywhere, for doing nothing!! None of us!!
So we're all a bit p!ssed off to put it mildly. And then we hear that pregnant women on sw are entitled to two grants to buy clothes....I'm not sure what you expect to hear when I literally have 12euro to feed myself and my child on for the next 9 days. Have you watched the news recently - can you see what's happening all around you?
Like I said, it's your attitude that is annoying - and I don't think anyone posted a 'vile' comment - most, if not all who were in anyway negative are just mightly p!ssed off with their own current financial woes, and then read here that pregnant women on sw can get money for clothes. I'm not sure what reaction you expected to be honest.

This is true...but its not in dire straits because women avail of clothing subsidies when they expecting on social welfare.

dumb_parade

I have a few questions for the OP.

Why arent you getting any rent allowance, as you stated earlier? From a quick look on the web you should be entitled to something.

Where is the father of the child in all of this? Surely he has to be contributing something? He too has a responsibility here too?

In terms of employment, i cant imagine there are going to be too many employers looking to employ visibly pregnant women. However some sort of temp work would prob suit and may be easier to manage at this stage?

wolfpawnat

angelfire9 wrote: »

Mmmm.... a haircut... chance would be a fine thing my hair is almost at the stage where i can sit on it now but there is no way I can afford the 20-30 quid to get it cut, 30 quid = bread, milk and meat for the weekend
Maybe i should get my mother to cut my hair like she used to when i was around 10

Had to get the student special and ask my MIL to pay the rest Embarrassing

CK2010

im just explaining why people acted the way they did, you asked why.

but tbh if you saw your bump getting bigger, which is inevitivble when you're carrying a baby, could you not have made sure to put a few bob aside on a good week before it got to the point where you needed new clothes?

i know that its hard to get by on SW and generally you cant save any, believe me i know, but if you cant do it when you've no baby how are you gonna do it when baby needs a doc visit out of the blue/shoes/all the other things that arent a regular expense that you budget and you dont have anything saved???

i get that you'll be working but you wont be from day one..

CK2010

dumb_parade wrote: »

I have a few questions for the OP.

Why arent you getting any rent allowance, as you stated earlier? From a quick look on the web you should be entitled to something.

Where is the father of the child in all of this? Surely he has to be contributing something? He too has a responsibility here too?

In terms of employment, i cant imagine there are going to be too many employers looking to employ visibly pregnant women. However some sort of temp work would prob suit and may be easier to manage at this stage?

afaik you dont get a family rate of rent supplement until bubba is born, not sure though.

kirstyor123

Fittle wrote: »

I agree wholeheartedly with CK - you received this grant already but you choose to spend it on clothes that wouldn't fit you during your pregnancy. That was your choice.
And then you're looking for another grant. The country is currently in dire straits - the whole country - not just you and few, if any of us, can get 150euro anywhere, for doing nothing!! None of us!!
So we're all a bit p!ssed off to put it mildly. And then we hear that pregnant women on sw are entitled to two grants to buy clothes....I'm not sure what you expect to hear when I literally have 12euro to feed myself and my child on for the next 9 days. Have you watched the news recently - can you see what's happening all around you?
Like I said, it's your attitude that is annoying - and I don't think anyone posted a 'vile' comment - most, if not all who were in anyway negative are just mightly p!ssed off with their own current financial woes, and then read here that pregnant women on sw can get money for clothes. I'm not sure what reaction you expected to be honest.

Oh get over it will you you sound like a jealous child just because your not eligible for these grants,,
Dont be pissed off with the people who are just because of your own current finances at the moment. You say i have an attitude my god read your post your the one with the attitude.