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I was asked for a light today..

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Comments

  • #52
    kelle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,243 ✭✭✭kelle


    I was asked for a cigarette one night when I was on my way to meet work colleagues in a restaurant. I just said "Sorry, I don't - haven't picked up that habit yet!" meaning to be funny but - jesus, the evil look she gave me! Two days later, this happened!


  • #53
    Kidchameleon
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,482 ✭✭✭Kidchameleon


    I had a **** on a plane


  • #54
    hidinginthebush
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,679 ✭✭✭hidinginthebush


    alwaysadub wrote: »
    I got a letter asking to see my bank statements.
    The cheek of them just assuming i have a bank account!

    That you Bertie?


  • #55
    moondrizzle
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11 ✭moondrizzle


    I went and hot a haircut today, the barber did not need to spray my hair because it was already slightly wet from the rain.


  • #56
    staker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,677 ✭✭✭staker


    I found out today a billion is 1,000 million, as opposed to 1,000,000 million- there was me thinking the country was fucked:rolleyes:


  • #57
    Irish Guitarist
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,736 ✭✭✭Irish Guitarist


    A while ago someone asked me if I had a fag. I couldn't be bothered telling him I didn't smoke so I just said "no". He waited until I was at the end of the street and then shouted "F**K YOU!" about six times.

    Next time anyone asks me for a fag or a light I'm going to tell them I don't smoke. Either that or I'll stab them.


  • #58
    aujopimur
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,953 ✭✭✭aujopimur


    I got a letter addressed to The Occupent.


  • #59
    BrokenArrows
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,498 ✭✭✭BrokenArrows


    I have a keyring torch that i pull out in these situations!


  • #60
    SugarHigh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,265 ✭✭✭SugarHigh


    jackiebaron wrote: »

    PS carrying a lighter even when you don't smoke is a good way to be a helpful chappie to a lady who needs one...NO?
    And you might just get to ride the bum off her.
    carrying a light when you do smoke is a good way of not looking like a complete fücking moron.


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  • #61
    newmug
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,571 ✭✭✭newmug


    Myself and a friend were waiting outside a nightclub for a taxi, my friend was smoking, I wasnt cos I dont. This lad walked up and asked for a light. My mate replied "guay outa that". Yerman couldnt believe it. He started shouting "Do you know who I am? I could have you killed in a second, no-one would even know! I've seen your face, I'll remember you, you f@ggot". With that he walked up to one of the bouncers, who not only gave him a light, but supplied a ciggie aswell. All the while yerman was mumbling "look at those f@ggots over there, did you see that?"

    My mate was a dick, but yerman was an even bigger dick.


  • #62
    FlutterinBantam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,575 ✭✭✭✭FlutterinBantam


    Magenta wrote: »
    I was asked for my favourite humming noise today..
    Yes, I was visiting a clinic at the Mater Hospital and upon regging ya wan behind the counter went through my details and landed me with this bomb of 'what's your favourite humming noise'.

    I just went 'wtf' in my head and after an awkward slience said 'err none'.
    Then she just wobbled her head and promptly kept typing into her pc.

    Now, what frigging relevance is my favourite humming noise in order to get treatment in a hospital?

    Thought Ireland was in the 21st century and why would a hospital care about my favourite humming noise :confused:

    Me knob rasping off yer flaps missus....

    :o Your'e a girl... ,sorry 'bout that.


  • #63
    foxinsox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,080 ✭✭✭foxinsox


    ballsymchugh wrote: »
    .

    so, what insignificant few seconds could you have made a big deal out of today??:D

    The fact that the guy (with the frogs requiring painting) came into my work today:

    Me: "Hi"
    Guy: "Grand day out"
    Me: "Yeah it is"


    He never mentioned the feckin frogs.... :eek:


    I could have made a big deal of it..

    But I didn't..


  • #64
    Tubsandtiles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 673 ✭✭✭Tubsandtiles


    Was it dark out by any chance ? :D


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