Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

lalee17

Dear ******,

I miss you. We were together for two years, and now it's over. I can't believe it. I'd do anything to get you back, anything. I know that we were supposed to be together. If you gave me a chance to start over, things would be different. I can't stop thinking about you. No girl has ever come close to you in my life. I just wish you'd talk to me again, I'm so sick of crying.

A.

flowerchild

Dear G

I have to go, so I have come back to say goodbye. I have tried so very hard to reconnect with you, and it isn't happening, and it is never going to happen, and I need to accept that. I get very confused about our (non) relationship. I have never felt this way before or tried so very hard, with anyone. I am accustomed to being yearned for, not yearning. I am accustomed to moving on, relatively easily. And since I have been married I have never before felt anything for a man who is not my husband, let alone a disembodied person who I can't see, hear or touch. It feels bizarre, very strange, but still it has happened.

I feel like I have been knock, knock, knocking on heaven's door. Saying 'hello, is anyone there?' and getting no response. And that experience of 'no response' is very consistent. So from that point of view I need to accept that your choice not to respond is both intentional and congruent. You are not too busy to respond. You are choosing not to respond.

If that is true, then I would think that you would prefer not to have anything not to respond to. That is, it is easier for you if I stop trying. It is more courteous. Because I am finally getting the message that you want me to go away. So I will.

I was sitting in the kitchen with my husband this morning talking to him about this. Where we are at, me knocking, and you not responding, and crying about how I felt. He was very kind, neutral about the fact that I was talking to him about my feelings for another man. He did say to me that he was genuinely confused about why it was taking so long for me to 'get it'. Because from his point of view you have been rejecting me for a long time. He said that he was confused because I am an intelligent woman who normally gets something in a nanosecond. That I don't have a history of crushes, let alone unrequited crushes, so he doesn't understand what is happening here. But his advice, and it is rare for him to give advice, was to stop playing and being on the forum, and reading the posts on the forum. Because it is not good for me. It does not serve my needs.

And he is right. I know that.

I feel stressed about the rejection, which I experience every day. I am still a good person but I am more sharp with my children and with my husband than I used to be, and I don't like to be sharp. I am kind and caring and open and warm. And that is how I intend to stay. Being true to myself and true to my image of myself.

So I need to let you go. Which is weird because you have already let me go, so how could I let someone go who I do not have? I don't know, but the truth is the only control I have is over myself.

I woke up this morning saying 'I hate you'. I didn't intend to say it. It just popped out. And it popped out a few more times as I lay in bed before I got up. What was confusing was I didn't know who the 'you' was. Was I saying I hate you? Or was I saying I hate me? Or was I expressing anger towards my husband? I actually have no idea. But I do know that I don't want to wake up with confusion and negative thoughts and feelings and a morass of sadness. Which is what is happening.

I have a life here, on the other side of the world. And it is a good life, with a good man who accepts and understands me, and loves me with a passion. And I have work that I enjoy and clients who think I am wonderful. I have opportunities to study whatever I want, and to put the time into it to do really well. I have fantastic children who I need to concentrate on so that they can grow up to be the very best they can be. And all of that means that I need to let go this thing that I don't understand.

I feel connected to you in a way that I don't understand, and I tried to find a way to have that connection and still be true to my life here. I tried very hard, for years. And it's just not happening.

So it's goodbye. I say it with love, not hate, nor indifference. I wish the result were different. But it isn't. And that's life.

Best wishes. Much love.

M

Carter12

Dear N,

Please leave me alone, please let me move on. Im wore out now. Its been 10 years and I havent the strength to do it anymore.

Stop saying your going to leave me alone, upsetting me, and then contacting me again the following week.

It was so hard to let you walk out the door yesterday, how i stopped meself from asking you to stay ill never know. Maybe I am finally getting stronger.

D x

Asphyxia

Dear ????

Why do you have to be so difficult? It's not funny when children are involved :mad: Your 1 year child started calling me Ma today! He should be calling you that but I'm not surprised seeing as I take care off him 5 days a week. You're his mother and you don't even care...

When you asked me today to mind him for the weekend I felt heartbroken that you wouldn't want to have him with you over Easter I don't even understand why I'm surprised.. drink, drugs and your boyfriend comes first before him! I had a feeling it would happen so I had already bought him a little Easter egg and a few toys.

I had him for three weeks straight the day after you brought him home from the hospital, I bought him a costume and dressed him up on Halloween for the party, I had him on his first birthday, I brought him to the beach yesterday for the first time and now I have him for Easter! These are all things you should have been a part of.

It makes me so sad that you have no care for him I was so upset I cried a little lastnight My boyfriend and I have just lost respect for you, you really don't deserve an amazing happy baby like him! :(:(

D

allandanyways

Dear x

Cop the fcuk on to yourself and grow a pair. I'm sick of your childish behaviour, it's not my fault your life is a mess.

Don't begrudge my happiness just because you're a miserable bítch.

Sincerely

Me.

Novella

K,

I used to be incredibly envious of you. I used to think you sailed through life, and that I got the bad end of the deal. Y'see, mam stopped working when you were born, she took care of you herself... but she was never able to do that for me. I guess I always sort of felt like mam, dad and you were a family... without me. You kind of were, 'cause I grew up with nanny and grandad (and that was amazing) but it was so hard not to feel like I didn't belong.

I know now that it wasn't as easy for you as I always thought. I know how stressful it is to live up to those really high standards that are always set for you. I crumbled under the same. For me, in my head, I thought I needed to be better than everyone else, academically in my case, to make mam proud, to make her love me.

It isn't that she ever meant to put me (or you) under pressure, she truly did (and does) just want the best for us. She wants us to have all of the things she never had, I think. She's so sad though. She's sad and she worries we will be too. That's why she's obsessed with us being 'the best'.

I try to protect you a lot. No one ever tells you how wonderful you are, there's never any praise. Sometimes I wish I could just make mam see, I wish she'd understand that you're perfect. Even without the fact that you're so intelligent, even if you weren't ridiculously talented at both hurling and football, you're such a good person. I've heard people say, "He makes the world a better place", but you honestly do.

In the last year, you have made me proud on more occasions that I could count. Sure, there were the times when you won things and there were your fantastic mock Leaving Cert results, but above all, I'm proud of the caring, loyal, strong, funny (I could go on all day...) young man that my baby brother has grown in to. It has been a pleasure to stand on the side-lines (both literally and figuratively) and watch.

I hope you know how much I love you.

S

Storminateacup

Dear Trouble,
I was so frightened of you when I first met you. You were a bit older, and such an asshole to everybody. I'll never forget the night we first started to talk - you were drunk and I was too frightened of you to ignore you. I'm so glad that I was too. You turned out to be the best friend I could ever have.

As we got to know each other more, I started to rely on you a lot. You were there to pick up the pieces from my toxic relationship, my out of control behaviour and you held me and let me cry about things I fought so hard trying to escape from. You are still the only person, no matter whats happened, that truely knows me. You have been the only person i've ever been friends with that truely cared about me and what happened to me.

Its because of you that I found enough strength to pick myself back up, to keep going despite everything else at the time telling me otherwise.

You might act like an asshole to everybody else, but youve never been anything but an angel to me. I love you more than I am capable of loving people I've known my entire life. You really and truely are the best friend I could ever have asked for.

You know, for the past 5 years, you've held my hand and helped me become the stronger person I am today. I'll always be here for you, if you ever need me. Don't forget that.

I love you,

Mess. x

LegacyUser

Dear S
You are my only friend and I'm sorry I'm so hard on you sometimes. I don't know which way is up for most parts of my life, I only act like I know whats going on and you're even more lost than I am. Sometimes I wish I didn't know you because I love you so much it hurts and I don't know if we'll ever get to be together and being around you makes me sick with anxiety over it.

Moomoo1

wow. I just read the whole thread in one go this morning. It's quite something.

Konata wrote: »

You caused me so much pain. I did everything I could to block it all out - the guilt, the shame, the memories that cut so deep into my mind. In order to run away from you, I gave up so much of what I had. I couldn't leave my room for fear of bumping into you on campus and I spent my time drinking, eating and cutting. Anything to forget about it.

It's over a year later but still none of our friends know. Two of them know we had sex... but not one knows the truth. I'm afraid to tell them, afraid to create that rift, afraid that you'll call me a liar. Is it better to leave it this way? You mean nothing to me anymore and I know I'll be ok.

But for raping me, for taking my virginity and for plunging me into the severest depression I've ever experienced, I know that I will never, ever forgive you.

people like that should rot in hell :mad:.

ironictoaster wrote: »

When I first met you, I had the biggest crush on you ever since summer. We had an unreal amount in common, so much more than anyone I know. I knew I really liked you when I realised had to repeatively delete my inbox on my phone after the ridiculously long conversations we had and countless chats on facebook about the most random things. During our 1st year of college, I finally grew a pair and told you how I felt face to face. Unrequited love at it's finest. I recently found you're relationship with a guy back from your home country, I was saddened and hurt, but I got over it eventually.

However, what you have done tonight has killed a small part of me as well my confidence on getting close to anyone again. I cannot sleep or eat hence why I am on the internet so late. A small part of me is thinking why him over me. it's like you knew what I was about to witness was going to **** with my head for a very long time. The fact it was one of my few friends doesn't help either

I hope that poor guy knows from your country know what he's getting himself into when he travels way half across the world to come over here next week after saving for months just for you.

ouch. I know the above is trivial compared to the death and violence that many of the others have written about, but I still winced. It's really hard to take when someone you revere and idolise falls down like that.

Ickle Magoo

Moomoo1, this thread just does what it says on the tin and is for people to post things they want to say, it's not for asking/giving advice/discussion/bumping posts/etc.

Many thanks.

Moomoo1

Sorry.

I'll write a proper entry later.

LegacyUser

To Mam,
I never got to say goodbye to you and that just ate away at me for so long when you died. I wish I got to go home that weekend and maybe I would have noticed you weren't feeling well and maybe you would be alive today! I still find it hard to get my head around you were here one minute and dead the next. Its mad how things can change in a blink of an eye! If something positive can come from your death, I appreciate time and people more! I go home way more to see Dad and sure dad is dad and as you know couldnt get better. We couldnt talk about you for a long time after you died, even on that first Christmas day after you died we went to the graveyard separately knowing where the other was gone but just couldnt mention you, I suppose for fear we would set each other off crying. Christmas dinner was miserable without you but as the Christmas days have gone on its got better and now we often bring you up in stories and what would you say in sceanories. We nearly didnt have a Turkey this year with the terrible snow but after a hair-raising car journey home I arrived home safely with a Turkey in the boot. Sure dad would have eaten anything but couldnt let you down thinking I was feeding him something like rashers on Christmas Day! I have told others to appreciate their mams more, some take it on board but I know others just think whatever! I know people dont understand grief unless they go through it. I would love to have one more conversation with you to tell you how much I love you and thanks for everything. I have found as the years have gone by I realise there was no much I never got to ask you about! Hope I make you proud!

Storminateacup

daddy, you are my rock. i love you so much. i have no idea what i would do without you.

LegacyUser

We have only been together a few short months, but you already have become the best girlfriend I have ever had. You're amazing to me, you make me smile and laugh and you're still there when I do silly things, like overreacting over something that didn't need it whatsoever. You told me you probably would have had the same reaction and it made me feel so much better, once the overreaction had gone and the guilt kicked in. I have so many issues, fears and anxieties from a not-so-easy life and past relationships, but you seem to understand this and accept them. I'm trying, so so hard, to get over these. I'm getting there, I feel. You're worth the effort. You make me want to be a better man.

Thank you.

LegacyUser

To,

I wish I could still talk to you. Its been years but when I see you my heart strings still pull. I miss you, you were my first love. We went through so much together and now we cant even talk about it even though its the biggest event thats had huge significants in both our lives.

So much has happened. And although we have both moved on I still think about you and hope you are ok.

You will always hold a place in my heart and I truely hope you are happy.

I know in some world we were meant to be together but unfortunatley its not this one.

I still love you and think I always will.

Yours,

littlebows

N,
then, now, always.
C.
xx

LegacyUser

to my boy,

Every day I feel so grateful to have you as a friend. Although we live far apart, you are my closest friend. You are so special to me and I hope to have you in my life forever. I love you very much.

H xxx

merlie

L

I am sorry for not being there when I should have been. I know I made a mistake and this I do regret. I could have done things better.


M

Elphaba

You'll be gone 5 years this year and I still think about you all the time. Usually it makes me smile but sometimes if I'm upset over something I think of you and it sets me off cos I just wish I could sit and talk to you. I know you are happy cos you're with Grandad now and you were apart for so many years. I always bring your gaurdian angel with me whenever I travel and it feels like you're watching over me. I will always always cherish the last time I spoke to you XXXXXXXX

cyan95

Dear MIL,
Just to let you know I absolutely hate you. Since FIL died you have made mine and your son's life a misery. I have never seen anyone like you where you have to be the centre of attention all the time. You are an energy vampire and a totally toxic person to be around.:mad:
What you don't know yet it that we are both going to Canada next year basically to get away from you and to get our lives back on track as they have been off track for the last three years.
The one thing I will never forgive you for is that you never let your son grieve the loss of his father - because then you wouldn't be centre of attention.

I hate you, I hate been around you so in a couple of months I won't be - so who are you going to hang onto - your other useless excuse of a son in England - and make their lives miserable.

You miserable b***h - life is wasted on you.

LegacyUser

This is to someone who i know reads boards a lot, though not sure ever registered.

2 years ago i made the biggest mistake of my life, left my wonderful girlfriend because...i dont know why. Because i was an idiot. For someone else who turned out to be demented at best. And it wasn't a mistake just because my new girlfriend turned out to be a nightmare. Even at the time i just KNEW it was wrong. That i did the wrong thing. You even said it, you were not upset at first because you knew i'd realise the mistake i was making. If only i did.

Since meeting her my life is ruined, lost all my friends to her issues,job, i'm a slave to her problems, and cant leave for various reasons at the moment though i very very much want to. thought the grass is greener, it most certainly was not!

Why am i leaving this message here? My girlfriend checks my phone records, uses my email, im not able to talk to people, she listens in on my phone, etc etc

So to you, though i cant leave any details for fear of being discovered, I'm so sorry. I was so wrong. I was an idiot. you treated me like a king and i threw it away. Maybe you'll read this, maybe you wont. And how will you ever know its you I'm talking about? Or that its me. I don't know.

I picture you sat at your desk reading this on your break in work or maybe on your iphone as you come into work on the train, stopping and maybe somehow just knowing its me. Just want you to know there hasnt been a day gone by i dont regret leaving, i've wanted to say im so sorry for years now and sadly this is the only way i can.
You are an amazinig person, i know i hurt you so so much, i hope the hurt is long gone and your living an amazing life. I feel so so stupid. I had it all and i was too selfish and immature to know it.

Sometimes in life you got to make mistakes to learn and grow up. Wish i had my set of values i have now back then. Wish i still had you. I know i deserve the egg on my face, and i deserve the worst. I brought all this on.

Anyway, to you - where ever you are, I am so sorry. I need to say it, even like this because I have nightmares about it still.

I hope for the day i can come see you, like a friend - like you asked at the time and i refused not coz i wanted too, but at the time had too.

Until then i have loads of memories of you.

Goodbye from a fool

xx

doubtfir3

That year we spent together was simply the best of my life.. you enlightened me so much sexually, you showed me that i didn't need to work so much, showed me that i had nothing to prove to my dad, that I am a good person and you pushed me to experience all that life has to offer.

When you had to go back to France I was devastated... It took me 3 years to "get over you".. but I never truly did.. I was so happy that we were so in love and so very honest with each other always.

So, now that you have settled at home and want me to come visit I know what's on your mind.. we talked about it!!!

But, can I give up everything I worked for here in Ireland? Yes, it has lost its gloss and I'm not fulfilled here.. and I've never met anyone even remotely like you or someone who could come within 100 miles of the way you make me feel.

I love you and want to come running to spend the rest of our lives in bliss, happiness and living my ideal life in France..

But, can I make the leap?! I'm afraid!

xx

itac

Dear Mum, Dad, Big Brothers, Big Sister and my two Nieces.

Thank you so much for everything. I wouldn't be who I am without the love and support of you guys. Everytime I've felt life has been getting the best of me, one of you has said or done something to make me realise I can get through whatever's ahead of me.

Losing Gran so suddenly made me realise just how important family are, how lucky I was to have been born into our family; and just how loving, supportive, funny, warm and wonderful you all are. We all have our faults, but true love recognises the ugly moments in life as well as the beautiful. I know that no matter what life throws at us, we are as just as together in comfort as we are in sorrow, and I'm so grateful to still have you all in my life.

I may not always show it but I do love you all from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for making me, and more importantly, thank you all for being you...♥

MissMiami

To Shane,

I miss you so much and can't wait to see you in person again. It's been the toughest few months of my life and I wish you had been here with me, as it was hard enough without you been gone too. I know we will be back together soon and hopefully can make some great memories! New York is going to be amazing and who knows what journey in life we will take afterwards!

Love you loads,
T

By the way, my heart is still racing after that skydive, I don't think I'll ever recover!

LegacyUser

Dear H

It's been a while. The majority of the time, I feel nothing towards you. There is still part of me that wants you to know how much you hurt me. I don't think you ever will. You sent me fake apologises; a veneer for the passive aggressive rage you felt. You were always the victim and never could take responsibility for the actions and decisions you made. I should have seen it in the way you treated your mother. One thing I always wanted to know, did you think I was a fool? To believe all the lies, to loves you despite your increasing bad treatment of me, I think I was a fool. I don't know how I would feel if you agreed. All I wanted was the truth and you could never give it to me. I guess I'll never know. You'll make some woman a very unhappy wife, of that I'm sure. I really don't mean it in a malicious way. I feel bad for any woman who is made to feel the way I did. I hope you can change, I don't know if you want to though.

cdaly_

Silly Chap wrote: »

my new girlfriend turned out to be a nightmare. ...

Since meeting her my life is ruined, lost all my friends to her issues,job, i'm a slave to her problems, and cant leave for various reasons at the moment though i very very much want to. ...

Why am i leaving this message here? My girlfriend checks my phone records, uses my email, im not able to talk to people, she listens in on my phone, etc etc

Leave her. Leave her now.

doubtfir3 wrote: »

But, can I give up everything I worked for here in Ireland? Yes, it has lost its gloss and I'm not fulfilled here.. and I've never met anyone even remotely like you or someone who could come within 100 miles of the way you make me feel.

I love you and want to come running to spend the rest of our lives in bliss, happiness and living my ideal life in France..

But, can I make the leap?! I'm afraid!

Take a 1-year career break and go to France. You'll know when it's getting near time to come back to Ireland...

Wibbs

cdaly_ to quote my fellow mod one page ago...

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

this thread just does what it says on the tin and is for people to post things they want to say, it's not for asking/giving advice/discussion/bumping posts/etc.

Many thanks.

Leslie91

To.......

You were my first love. Love is blind. I learnt the excruciating way. I cannot understand how I did not see what was going on, how much of a fool I was being made look. It seems everyone else knew but me. You cheated more than once, why?, what did I do wrong/not do right. I did not deserve that. I deserved more.

And you know what I got more, much more, more than you could ever be. You were/are a poison and I wish the worst for you. I am in a better place.

L.

Fluorescence

Dear Y,

I'm sorry, I've no idea what I'm doing. I'm allowing myself to grow close to you again, even though that's not what I want, and I'm just going to hurt you... AGAIN. Jesus, you'd think I would have learned before but apparently not. Yet, here I am stringing you along AGAIN. If you'd any sense at all you'd run miles but you don't. You're too damn nice (and you think I'm nice, but you've no idea...). Seriously - what the flying fig rolls am I doing?

I'm sorry. Fuck. I should stop talking to you, stop answering your messages, stop enjoying the attention, but I can't seem to help myself. I'm pathetic. I just wish you'd see it and stop feeding my ego. Lord knows I don't need it.


Fluorescence

Gunslinger92

Dear G,

You have no idea how much I am dreading the summer, dreading being away from you for weeks at a time again. There will be moments where I question is it all worth it, worth the pain and the misery and the tears and the missing you. But those moments will be mere nanoseconds, because I know full well it will be so much more than worth it. You are my best friend as well as my boyfriend. I'd trust you with my life. I can see myself building a life with you. Most people would laugh at me for that, because we are so young, but I don't care.

I just want you to know that I will stay strong. I don't want you to worry about me, because I know you do. I will be fine, you will be fine, and we will continue to be amazing.

R