Things you want to say to husband/boyf/ex's/friends/family/people *MOD NOTE POST #1*

LegacyUser

I was sitting at home doing paperwork. Next thing I get a what app from you. I had to read another lot of complaints. I tried to be supportive as I know you dealing with a lot at the moment.
You then tell me you are going to do x on Y date. This is despite me asking for your help on the same date a few weeks ago. So much for you telling me that you would try to get out of this.

I am going to give you a chance to sort this out.
You have let me down and canceled things a lot over the past few months due a number of reasons. If I am left on y date to deal with things on my own I won't forget it. I have been their a lot for you over the past two years so it is time for you to return the favor.

LegacyUser

Thanks Karma for letting that happen. It was the best laugh I had in a while. I can just imagine what was going though your mind when you realised who was in front of you.
You made no effort to hide it either.
It is not nice when your put on the spot like that and after all you did and said to one person over the past few years it could not have happened to a "nicer person".

The best is yet to come and you have no idea of when or where.

sunshine and showers

P, you are being an immature arséhole. I love you, but sometimes I want to kill you. :mad:

Sunny Dayz

Seriously, can you not just do it yourself - you have to interrupt me and get me to do things. And I'm left wondering why it takes me so long to get things done!

Starkystark

Dear "friend".

Would you ever just grow up! You're 30 next year - I'm 4 years younger than you and you act like a complete attention seeking child. There's always something wrong with you, and you take out on others. When you're not getting your desired level of attention - We are the ones that are always in the wrong. I actually think you think that it bothers me ignoring my messages - little do you know that it's one step further for me to letting you off for good. Grrrr your actually lucky you have some eejits that dance to your tune otherwise you'd be a very lonely girl.

erica74

If you didn't want me to hurt your feelings, you shouldn't have hurt mine for 18 years.

Bambi985

I love you with every fibre of my being but I know that this is as far as we go and it's the worst kind of hell I've ever known.

erica74

All this talk of the leaving cert reminds me of that terrible time in my life. Trying to study while you two fucking murdered each other. 6th year was from September until May, 8 months, and you couldn't just give it a fucking rest during that time, not even turn things down a notch?

You know, maybe I just didn't try hard enough but you try studying for a set of exams that might actually allow you to GET OUT while your parents are murdering each other and physically and mentally abusing you. It wasn't easy and it wasn't fair.

But then, in March, the day after St Patrick's Day, you saw me looking through a college prospectus and you ripped it out of my hands and threw it across the room. You laughed at me and told me there was no money to send me to college. So I decided fuck it, what's the point, and I threw in the towel.

Neither of you even noticed I had stopped going to school and didn't go back until I had to sit my exams. Yeah, I sat them, but my head wasn't in the game.

And do you know what weighed on my mind the most? You had money to send my brother to college. The same brother who abused me.
Where was my chance?
And for the past 12 years I have put up with snide comments and being looked down on because of your choices.

And it really does hurt at this time of year to see all the smiling faces, the joy and excitement, the hope about what's to come. I wanted that. Where was my chance?

erica74

So today I found out that our brother abused you too.
What to do.
Are we supposed to make him pay?
I'm so confused.

Vela

It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah.

Sunny Dayz

That "joke" and slagging is really not funny. Give it a rest.

DancingDaisy

Every time you had sex with me and knew I don't want to, that constituted rape, and a small bit of me died.
Every time I told you no, and you guilted me into it, that was coercion, and I hated myself for giving in.
Every time you told me that I was frigid or a prude or not good enough, I believed you and it made me worse.
Every time you told me that my telling you I had the right to say no was the same as me calling you a rapist, you made me feel like I had no voice.

I left, not because I didn't love you, but because I wanted to live, and you were slowly killing me with what you believe is love.

jennyhayes123

Ye are both killing me. Being Stuck in the middle is awful. It's tearing me apart

erica74

What you did to me shaped me as a person before I had any idea who I was.
I want to go back in time and cry my eyes out and shout "I don't understand what you're doing to me or what you're making me do". I want to shout "please stop". All I want to say is "no".
Do you remember how confused I looked? I remember how confused I felt. I still feel confused.

wendydoll

I wish you could see me right now, crying alone in the dark.

The sooner my heart realises you are a terrible, hurtful, unlovable and ungrateful person the better. The rest of me can't take you causing me so much upset anymore.

clairewithani

You have killed every bit of confidence I had. I have just realised I have spoken to hardly anyone apart from work colleagues for weeks. I can't even make small talk in shops any more. Why did I let you do this to me?

addicted to caffeine

To the students and staff of my college:

thank you for making it the best 2 and a half years of my life I can't believe it I'm finished today as it went by so quick Thanks for the card and the cake, and I'll pop by for a natter now and again

Regards,
ATC

wendydoll

You were right E, I was nothing more than an easy ride to him. I should have listened to you all along

erica74

Are we being frozen out for telling what he did to us? Your son is in the wrong, not me.
Then again, you weren't that great at being parents anyway. I just thought you might be interested.

stop animal cruelty

D

Oh just fuk off its my car,my problem. Fs.

Sunny Dayz

How am I going to know if you don't tell me? Do you not think I've enough to be doing without chasing around after everyone?

DunnoKidz

Dear Heart, why did ya have to look back at those old posts? I nearly forgot how much we loved him. Let's keep it that way, shall we?

wendydoll

I wrote you a letter last night, it took me over an hour to find the right words to explain my feelings. I know it will never change anything but I needed to do it just to get it all off my chest so you could understand me a little better and I could have my say without you interrupting me.

I have it sealed and ready to give to you but I don't know if there's any point giving it to you now. Would you even take the time to read it?

What should I do!!!!!

Eeden

Today (well yesterday, now) would have been a significant anniversary. Well I guess it still is an anniversary, whether I like it or not.

Seriously?!

At this moment in time I wish I could rewind back to Saturday night and tell you to take a running jump. Why bother saying all those things when you obviously didn't mean a syllable of it? It just bothers me that I actually thought you were genuine.

Another one chalked up to experience

Vela

Erica,

Your posts are heartbreaking. I am so sorry that you're hurting so much. I wish I could do something to help you. I just want you to know that it gets better. I promise you that.

For now, just get through and just keep getting through. Ask for help. Keep asking until you get it. Keep looking until you find it. And eventually, you will. Whether it's a friend, a therapist, a doctor, or even a support group. You just need an ally. You need someone to "get it" and tell you it's okay to feel how you're feeling. If you find that person, you'll be one step closer to finding yourself again.

You come across as such a strong-willed person and I have no doubt that you'll come out the other side of what you're dealing with right now. It'll never be completely okay. You'll never feel "completely fixed", but that's okay. You don't have to be. I don't think anyone really is in this life. Things will start to move again, time will stop making you feel like you're stuck in one place, and you'll find yourself moving forward again. And when that happens, you'll know that you can live with what happened to you. Not just survive. Live.

It doesn't feel like it now, but you'll get there and you'll get through this.

Vela

My dear Granny

You always pop up in my dreams when I need you the most. And here you are again. Last night I went to bed really stressed out, and I dreamt that you were standing in front of me and I was pulling you by that aran geansaí you used to wear - asking you to come with me. But you smiled and said you couldn't go, but that I'd be okay.

I woke up calm. Calm enough to figure out the **** that was stressing me out. And now, things are a little bit better - because of you.

I get the psychology theories behind dreams... that you're either a version of me or my subconscious dreamed you up to comfort me... or whatever. And I'm not even religious. All I know is that every time I'm down, you're there when I close my eyes. And I don't need to find an explanation for that. It just is. And it's enough.

sullivlo

Kalo mena.

When I realised this morning I had a little cry. Things are just so chaotic (in a good way) and I really wish I could pick up the phone and tell you all of the news.

Missing you

stop animal cruelty

S

Wtf?? Why say all those nice things and say youll take me on a date, then.......just like that.....radio silence. Why? Why play me like that? Fs. I dont think I did anything wrong, in fact remember I insisted we walk down to your favorite chipper, at 4am,just so u could get your burger? Is me? Do I give off some bad kinda smell or something?? Ugh. Hope I dont see u around.

The other S

Sign. How I want to see and be with you so bad. Im scared you might not like me, but fuk I still think of you everyday since we met. No other guy can match up to you,you are that perfect. I hope we stay in contact and hopefully meet in the near future. Hell, I like you so much, Im pretty in love with you...

wendydoll

I don't want to hear those word any more. The words mean nothing when your actions are the complete opposite.


And I wish I could just drop you from my memory the way you do me when you wish.